Not letting my husband see me naked

If this thread was about the merits or issues with living in an FLR, or if it was a discussion about our experiences of living in an FLR, or whether they are a realistic way to live, then your thoughts, opinions or questions would be very definitely valid.

But it isn’t.

Also I wrote “doesn’t hold much weight” not “holds no weight” and “rather devalued” not “devalued.”

 

If a couple got together and decided someone was going to be in charge, both agreeing to live with those decisions and the boundaries set, I think it would be a case of “I hear your complaint, I understand you’re upset, and I feel your frustration...the answer is no.”

When I started all this I thought it was going to be daily hours and hours of fore play and teasing, taken out of my cage all the time, and at least weekly orgasms. Turns out that is not what she had in mind. But we had an agreement before we started, and I agreed to do only what she wanted, and she agreed to only do what she wanted. I can’t be too upset when what I want doesn’t match with what she wants...because her wants are the only thing I agreed to. Well we have a few more,,,we split financial responsibility, and I make decisions about my son.

I didn’t think I was going to go from jacking off any time I felt like to not once had n over 3 years and likely never again...but I asked her to be in control and she doesn’t think I ever need to touch it. That’s what ya get

 

eminently fair, of course. thank you for your delightful riposte. : )

 

It’s similar here in that it’s nothing like I would imagine, but we asked so who are we to complain.

 

As others have commented, it is not so unusual for a Mistress to not allow her sub to see her naked. I knew a Mistress who would not let her sub see her naked and made him sleep in another room. He was summoned to her bedroom only when she needed his services.

It is quite natural for anybody to feel vulnerable when naked, we are so used to the protection of our clothes, and in my opinion no woman should ever feel vulnerable.

There is something exciting about never seeing somebody, who you are close to in so many ways, naked. For me I love the mystique of only being able to imagine what her body is really like, it is another form of tease and denial.

 

Just out of curiosity, but would you consider this to ever be the case if the genders were reversed?

I have been studying this lifestyle and FLR's for the past month and slowly questioning myself and finding answers; but quite frankly I find myself identifying more with the women here than the men.

I think it leads back to the date-rape i experienced at the hands of a predator 8 years ago. Thoughts? Any would help with the confusion I sometimes feel.

 

i have read this exchange with a great deal of interest. i will speak only of what i feel, and make no assertions of individual comments. i will start by saying that i am in an FLR, and would not be there had it not been for the gracious exploration of my Wife, my Queen.

i am not entitled to see my Queen naked. i very much want to. I very much appreciate her beauty. i love her, and i love that we discuss our preferences. we sleep naked, and i cuddle with her in my cage. (well, i wear it, W(w)e do not both fit into it) If Her preference was for me not to see Her naked, it would be discussed and W(w)e would evaluate our feelings. Whether or not in an FLR, it is always someone's own choice to present their naked body. Likewise, the male has a choice of what to do, in or out of an FLR.

Merely seeing someone naked IS NOT GROUNDS to leer or touch. Using the analogy of the meal that someone referred to, one could under the same approach never walk through a restaurant if they were hungry. Using the logic of permission you would eat off every table you pass! In case we need to be reminded, how about 'Me Too'.

i am fortunate to have a voice in my marriage. Frankly, i could not be in a marriage without one. Yes, i am submissive and my Wife is my Dominant. i am not Her doormat (unless She asks me to be!) and W(w)e share our lives. i have an opinion. i also have accepted that i do not have the final word.

i am a submissive, not a slave. That distinction is important in our relationship. While i can be a bratty submissive (and oh how i pay), a slave has no right to be bratty. Regardless of the title used, neither i nor any male have the right to abuse the privilege of being in a female's presence. Misuse is grounds for everything from punishment, to a marital review, to legal proceedings. This discussion is about human rights when it comes to a male pawing a female.

Finally, i am a husband, whether in female attire and a cage, i am Her husband. Yes, i have rights. my rights are to stay or leave, NOT to tell Her what to do. Her choice is made based on Her desires and Her desire to hear me.

To be in an FLR is a reality of our relative position. For me, an FLR is a privilege and while not forced, i choose to kneel. my Queen chooses to consider my needs, not necessarily to abide by them, but to consider them. W(w)e share mutual respect, not equal status.

 

Our loving FLR is founded on, amongst other things, my adoration and worship of Miss A's body.

Intimate or sexual touching is not allowed without her permission, but looking is not restricted generally. All looking is done with the utmost respect.

 

I have had in the past certain protocols to follow in the relationship, I must express verbaly and with plenty of cuddles my love and desire of my Mistress and upon realising she is waking to perform oral sex or analingus if shes on her front until she turns over, yet at other times I have been ordered to keep my eyes lowered to her feet and ankles, not allowed to see her body naked or clothed, this is frustrating yet erotic for me at the same time as my submissive nature enjoys worshipping her feet/shoes or stockings. The uncertainty of my protocols changing is also interesting and exciting. Mixing things up can be fun.

 

Have really enjoyed reading and folllowing this thread, love getting a glimpse in to others FLR’s and how you all set out your rules and protocols depending on the boundaries of your FLR.
From my point of view, things changed a lot when we progressed to cuckolding, after a few months madam confirmed there would be no piv sex for me any more. And madam was never happy with being naked in general, the only time madam would be naked was the rare times we would switch and that was only on my insistence,
With that disappearing when we commenced cuckolding I haven’t seen madam completely naked in years.
As we have many other fetish’s around Bdsm, when we do have a play session madam or both of us are in ether latex pvc or Lycra or a specific costume.
The only time I almost see her naked is if she chooses to wear one of her translucent latex catsuits, and quite ironically these are her favourite ones.
However madam always prepares and dresses by her self first and I am only permitted to enter once she needs zipping up and polishing.

 

My wife and i both have been so comfortable with each other nude while showering, bathing, sleeping in summertime, et cetera that it would be strange for both of us to change that. She made clear from well before we were married that she would not tolerate being groped (a lingering hug or kiss on the neck from behind is different and OK with her). Long before we went down the path of an FLR, i learned not to screw with her strongly stated preferences so that has not been a problem. Her rule is when she puts my collar on me, i don't look above her waist unless instructed to the contrary, regardless of what she is wearing (or not wearing).

 

I think that sounds quite reasonable. My KH / Wife has forbidden me from groping her and cuddling up in bed because she says I am disturbing her sleep. So I am laying there locked up next to my sexy KH / wife who I can’t touch. Pure torture and very erotic. It makes you desire your KH even more I imagine your husband feels the same.

 

wow, an interesting strategy ......
well being in FLR , you make the rules and he obeys .. this will implant a deep idea in his mind of how you are a privilege and he needs to earn your permission for every thing he does .he is being nurtured by a fine lady to the real path of being a man , he should be honored .

 

Wow... I.... don’t know if I could handle it...looking forward to seeing Her in all Her glory is what gets me through the work day sometimes!! I hope She never reads your post!

 

So I tried an experiment. Based on what Ms Tara found offensive, I decided to do the opposite. I didn't stare, ignored her when naked , didn't make any references to my wifes beauty, chose to give her space and not touch her etc. Her comment, was "whats wrong, don't you love me ?"

 

It is your privilege and right, you share your body and nakedness with whoever you want and with who you think deserves it.
You, as Domme decides and the submissive/slave obeys your wishes.

 

My Queen and I have evolved over the years, I did use a chastity device but now it’s the Honour System. 9 months now and it’s permanent.. I’m now my Queens slave. As she rightly points out I have no marital rights.
So I’m not allowed to look at my Queen naked anymore.. when she wants an orgasum I fetch her toys and kneel by the bed blindfolded. Occasionally my Queen will have me hold her toy but not touch her.
I find I have become more submissive,

Not for everyone each morning I start my day by sucking on an IceCube of her pee. I’m only allowed to kiss and lick my Queens ass or kiss her feet…
I’m enrolled to learn massage followed by a course in manicure/ pedicure.
The change to Master slave has made a very positive impact on both our lives.
My Queen would never go back now.
Just us

 

Fist time I am seeing this post but man I feel terrible for these relationships...

 

It does feel like attempts at stripping away layers of intimacy

I would be miserable in such a situation and wouldn't be able to stay in it very long

 

Unfortunately, this is a standard for me.. I am forbidden to watch and touch my pussy - except for very rare cases when I can give it an orgasm with my hand, but without looking or licking it after my lover.. I am forbidden to touch my breasts, but I can sometimes watch them as a reward.. kissing only as a friend.. next to the mouth or in the neck.. luckily I can adore her feet with my mouth

 

Thank you for sharing I have been experimenting with Chasity in hopes that my wife will find it to be a nice tool to prevent self alone time.

 

My wife has no problem with me seeing her nude

 

I feel terrible for you. I couldn't imagine going through life that way.