"Long lock-ups get easier over time"

A few days and my body is still bouncing around with hormonal imbalance.
A week is just barely enough to start to stabilize.
18-20 days I hit a stride where it all starts to feel really good
By day 30 I've invested so much and am feeling ungodly frustrated (but enjoying it) and am half way to orgasm all the time. Dripping precum at a moments notice. But I don't want to lose the feeling, have to start over.

What's a guy to do? It's why I stay out of the decision making process. My wife knows when she needs me to have a release.

 

My experience is that it gets easier.

I found that during a normal day, after being locked for ~2 months, that I wasn't always horny and thinking about sex, but as soon as my GF was around or if we were fooling around then my interest would peak.

Instead of being permanently hyper-aroused my arousal was spikey and really quite focused on her.

There is always a constant background hum of horny, but I think I just got used to it - maybe it still screams but I learnt to control my thoughts better.

 

It gets easier. It gets the new normal. Like not using your cock for her pleasure. It changes and will be easier. Maybe easier is the wrong word. It gets better. In every point.

On the opposite, after almost 2 1/2 years in chastity being unlocked and walking around like this is strange.

 

And a terrible speller! I’m teasing sorry.

Wanting to cum and not being able is never easy. It gets easier to lower your expectations of when that will be. It gets easier to handle that time might be a long time from now.

You don’t get less horny, but how you deal with it gets easier. Heck, sometimes after my wife cums using her wand, and I’m caressing her legs while she does so, it almost feels as if I came. My breathing slows with hers, and it feels like a refractory period after I’ve cum.

 

Once you’re addicted to chastity and the cage, you’ll really start to love the frustration you’re feeling! Back when my Wife would still give me a few days of freedom and a bunch of sex and orgasms after a long lockup, I’d start to crave the cage and lock again. And so would she, and after a few times of that, she realized it was time to stop the freedom days.
This last 8 months what I’m learning and is new for me, is now I only get a ruin or one full orgasm and then it’s weeks of denial again, and so even after the full, I’m not really having the subdrop at all or a big feeling of relief. So the ache and frustration level is on a new level I haven’t experienced in the years of doing this. It’s exciting and putting me in a submissive headspace my Wife is loving, she has embraced everything about this, orgasm denial, limiting my erections more, cut piv way down even from last year, pegging and spanking me more and more, it’s got me a total mess. I love every second of it!

 

With the longer times of denial (>3 months) there is definitely a change that happens with respect to the horny levels, calmness, and energy for other things.

It's a big hump to get past, and that is why you need that cage

 

It’s all about the journey and how we navigate the path of service to our soul mate & Goddess!

 

It’s all about the journey and how we navigate the path of service to our soul mate & Goddess!

 

I’m not so sure long term lockups get easier over time.. although it could be said more experiences do have a “conditioning effect” and expectations can develop…but remember these five things:
Surrender, Submit, Sacrifice, Serve, and Survival!
These five rules help me daily!

 

Agreed they are bald face liars

 

Hear, hear. Especially if she's been teasing me before so that I'm ravenously horny while pleasuring her (whether with tongue and fingers or strap-on), I often collapse in a puddle of emotional release when she has her final orgasm, and just lie cuddling in a blissful, post-orgasmic state, racing breathing and heart slowing down, as if it were *my* post-orgasm, not hers.

 

I agree!

 

I disagree. I definitely think it gets easier. Sometimes that’s actually to a disadvantage, wouldn’t it be nice if the drop just lasted 3 or 4 days. You were hormonally charged after a week?

Think back to your first lock up. Those first three days. 7 days. 2 weeks… milestones, all difficult to achieve. The overwhelming desperation!
Now those first three days you rue the release, you wish it didn’t happen. That week is spent in a dreary haze. 2 weeks and you’re finally rediscovering the love of frustration.

It gets easier because you understand you don’t want that release at all.

 

I share that view.

Just over 3 weeks ago I experienced a delicious full orgasm, my first in a long long time, and then a couple of days cage free (after being poorly and being cage free for two weeks).

I regret it, it was lovely, and we both came at the same time which was magical, but it really messed me up. I've been caged ~3 weeks now and the crazy horny feelings are starting to go back to a delicious simmer I had been experiencing pre-illness.

Prior to illness I was supercharged, full of energy, focused, determined - I felt great. Some switch had been flipped in my head. I'm looking forward to feeling like that again soon.

The experience was a good one, it reminded me that orgasms (or ejaculations, not sure which) are bad for me.

 

Likewise on your and @littleguy3's thoughts. The first two weeks after an orgasm is a roller coaster ride of instability, pure raging lust, and memories of the orgasm. Then things feel dull for a few days, before the slow simmer starts.

Now on day 36 or so it's full on boil of energy and [good] frustration. And knowing I can't anticipate that she may sneak an orgasm in on me has really changed things up. The dynamic has become immediately very different.

As for the orgasm vs ejaculation. My understanding is that orgasms are ok, not the ejaculation associated with it. But I have not had an ejaculation-less orgasm (though dying to experience it).

 

Completely different view
We don't have a set time between my sexual release
Week one is mess of emotions but then settles down and reality sinks in that this is it for a while
Personally I enjoy the control , the teasing and frustration that comes with long term chastity
Does it get easier longer term not sure but it certainly becomes more interesting

 

Before we can respond to this with any degree of understanding
would you please define
LONG LOCK-UP

Some of these comments are by people that have not yet experienced what some others consider to be a long Lock-Up

Questions need clarity if they are to be properly addressed

 

At least 3 months without the key going in the lock.

 

There you go people have something to work with now

It is my experience that most people when guiding/instructing couples in the early stages of experimenting with TTTWD seem to advocate that once its established that the cage/belt can be worn 24/7 for a week that the first lock-up duration be at least 3 months

I'll leave this for others to respond as it is a very long time since I had such a short lock-up

 

Don’t think I’d seen this reply prior to today. Apologies for my ignorance. I’m pretty sure this reply is more about ‘experiencing a drop’ than the ‘difficulty over time’ but I’m going to roll with it.

I was speaking generally around the drop, I don’t tend to experience these either. However, at the time I was writing in a place of feeling the like. How could that be so I hear you ask? You remember my writing after my last ruin, I was full of motivation, desire, excitement, longing… it was a mixed bag of positivity.
Yet, my mood fell off the proverbial cliff…

I was reading your responses:

We all attribute our moods to our point of last orgasm, but after what I have just experienced (and particularly reading Jays comment around illness) I have a different view on all this.

Any lock up is easy, no matter how long the time period, as long as it is met with the warmth of stability.

The hormonal cycle is apparent and creates the difficulty/joy/frustration, but not necessarily as a direct result of orgasm. There are other factors, in my scenario it was the enforced disinterest in my wife, it could be sickness, or could be stress etc. Without the stability, or the sense of growing frustration the effects can be noted. We then reach a simmer. Habituate to the situation. Peace is restored while-ever the situation remains constant…

Ok, my toddlers jumping all over me so I have completely lost my train of thought.

 

Ii don’t think other people’s situations need to be addressed. A long lock-up to some could be a cake walk to others, it’s relative to your situation.
If you were continuously locked for just 3 days, two weeks would seem extreme.
If you go 6 months, you might need two years to feel the same.
Could the conclusions drawn from either party be valid?

 

Once you have tried, it is hard to pass the first days, but with time and experience a week locked, then a month locked or more became the reality and you love it. It is an addiction and when you wife decide to stop the cage, you really miss it.
After a few years in chastity (and FLR for me) it is your new "normal" and you get used to as said by others.
To succeed you need a dynamic, for me wearing the cage was like having a PIV I really enjoy it with its pain.
For others it is the domination relation or the pegging.

I guess you need to find your way of loving it.