Enforced chastity & its growing popularity

I think male chastity is becoming more popular. I occasionally look at TikTok, it's always good for killing time if I've 10-15 mins to kill. Mostly it shows me engineering, cooking ,dancing & political clips . Occasionally it throws up fem Dom / fetish clothing clips . Because the algorithms identify your interests based on what you watch I have been getting lots of clips of young women talking about and promoting male chastity. This isn't confined to a few older people . This is people in their 20' being open about their lifestyle choices and fetish's. Bdsm is becoming much less taboo as is chastity.

 

What kind of young women? Particular sub cultures? Prodommes?

 

There are a few that I think might be pro dommes. Some that I don't think are . There seem to be quite a few goth types although most of those tend to be open about being sub . Cosplay also seems very popular along with latex and boot fetish's. I would say most are in their 20's .seeing the next generation being so open about these things is really quite heartening.

 

My wife has always enjoyed sex and can be very aggressive in her tastes and desires. When we started to date, I saw her as this cute little thing, but on the second date she took me to her dorm room and basically had her way with me. She could also be outrageous and I found trusting her gave me unique and varied experiences. She is also Bi and was another thing that surprised me in the beginning and also led to some real hot adventures. After we got married and had kids, we got involved with swinging and she was the wife all the guys wanted to be with because she was wild in bed.

Over the years between raising kids and her business taking off, our sex life slowed down and I looked for other interests. I amassed a large collection of DVDs of 80s and 90s porn and used them on occasion. Like most guys here, I got caught jerking off, the upside was I was not cheating on her with anyone else. It was a wake up call for both of us and as the kids went away to school and her business took off, we had more time to play.

My wife knew I had a thing for Erica Boyer videos and with her natural red curly kinky hair could transform herself into her double. First it was sexy role playing, then a few 3sums with her girl friend, then bdsm and acting out old Bruce Seven roles and movies, and then chastity. She likes controlling my cock, giving me orgasms, and still dressing and slipping into her Erica Boyer role. When she really wants to leave me frustrated on those weekends I remained locked, she would dress up like Erica and have me please her over and over again. Once and a while I would get pegged or wear a strapon for her to wear, but the worst part was when she was really devious.

Her and a girl friend would dress up, her like Erica and her GF like Nina Hartley, ties me to a chair, and please each other until exhaustion. Then a DVD would be turned on and the next 60 minutes was watching and Erica video while they washed up or had a snack. Then they would come back and untie me before heading off to bed and leaving me high and dry.

Porn and a wife with an imagination, deadly combination.

 

i agree, this lifestyle has become more popular since the turn of the century. it jjust seems so... natural. i understand civilization cycles between the male/female dominant role and suspect that transition is happening now.

 

WOW Giles...you have a PhD in this!

 

Shhh.

 

Thank you Mistress Sabine for asking this question.

I think all the things said about orgasms being better after a delay, and males being aware of the problem with porn, etc, are part of an overall trend.

We are simply at a time when female power is on the rise. It hasn’t shown up in the aggregate yet, but females are outperforming males on pretty much every metric of educational attainment, job performance, emotional intelligence etc.

Sexual relationships have always involved power differentials. The idea of a couple having equal power is a transient one at best. It has never been true throughout millennia of human history, and didn’t really become a mainstream idea until the 60’s and 70’s.

To cut a long story short, even if it seems like just fun in the moment, I think the trend is one part of a shift towards exploring the shift towards how sexual power works in an increasingly female dominated society.

I don’t expect a complete role reversal - we are past that time, but I do think we are going to see a much wider range of female dominated relationship styles emerging, with increasing levels of male submission being accepted as the norm and being expected by women.

I realize this excludes gay relationships from consideration, but from my perspective gay people have always needed to be more conscious in negotiating power relationships, and are essentially ahead of the curve that the rest of society is following.

Play is how we explore new parts of our reality, and given this wider trend, playing with male sexuality being controlled, and beyond that actually letting it be controlled, is just part of how we adapt to the changed social world.

 

I'm very reluctant to deduce some global trend from my personal observations. Reading in the filter bubble of my interests, the Internet provides me with what I'd like to be the reality. But on the other hand, mainstream-media only very rarely picked up a juicy story of some guy trapped in a CB and calling the fire department for help. Also I have jet to see e.g. a relevant advertising during the super bowl.

Yes, I am living this lifestyle as it is my dream - but only in the private confines of our home. Whatever happens outside of this shelter is beyond my grasp. I am very keen on family and friends and colleagues NOT FINDING OUT about me. The nature of a fetish / kink is to be hidden from others (unless it explicitly incorporates others). So how can we judge, on what happens in a seizable portion of bedrooms?

One strategy is for sure, to follow the money: Estimated sales of chastity devices and the creativity of creating jet more designs seem to support the argument. But we should be careful, not to mix the possession of a cock-cage with their application. Many of these devices might just collect dust in some drawer. Especially it is not uncommon, to read of people owning not just one but a dozen.

From another argument, we see a slow increase of women in leading positions. Part of it is for sure due to voting and education and sexual liberation by contraceptive ... but all this happened decades ago. IMHO it is too early to judge on any effect, that chastity might have on society.

Also the western world tends to count an uninterrupted phase of freedom since the end of WWII despite Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and the never-ending conflicts in Africa, because all of those didn't seriously threaten our homes and our daily life. Violence and crimes of war are separated from us through a TV-screen - once we are fed up with it, we just switch to a different channel.

But what has this done to the traditional male warrior? There is a very wide spectrum with many shades that would possibly not exist in face of a real threat. Only living in relative safety allows us to indulge these penchants - be it wearing a CB or collecting guns, storming capitol hill and playing Rambo.

As we were not fighting any outer enemy for decades, the pressure to align with our direct neighbors lessens. It is OK, to retreat into the privacy of our home. As long as everyone pays her/his tax bills and doesn't overstep the law, they are free to do, as they please. Therefore we see a newfound richness of culture and a multitude of styles and ways to organize and prioritize our life.

Coming back to the chastity-kink, I think it is only a tiny fraction of the full picture. Thanks to the internet, the birds of a feather can lump together. But at the same time, we can blissfully ignore everything that does not fit into this view. The result is what I call: FemDom Propaganda.

I don't want to step on any-ones toes. This is in no way negative ... partly I am here, to read exactly that: "Males on the decline - Women rule the world - all problems solved!" Only that I am not 100% convinced. To further challenge this: Have you ever considered, what females can do to other females? In the end they are still humans and get corrupted by their own power the same way as males do.

Only in a direct quarrel with a man, a female would most likely not resort to physical violence. So the image of them being talkative and verbal only holds under the threat of natures unequal distribution of muscles. But as stated before, we haven't experienced war or lawlessness since WWII. So the consequences of speaking up for the women lessened - though we still have a way to high rate of domestic violence and abuse.

Apropos - would more widespread application of chastity belts mitigate sexual harassment? I doubt it. A) the male would still possess the muscles to push a female around and B) confessions in this discussion already show, that the CB also doesn't really stop porn consumption.

That is why I think, there is a lot of wishful thinking going on here.

 

For many couples chastity and sometimes FLR bring the focus to a relationship that allows both to grow and enjoy each other.

 

I think it also creates exactly the sensual non-intercourse-focussed space recommended by sex therapists for couples trying to revive desire in the relationship.

 

Very interesting was not aware of that practice.

 

I suspect that dominant women are often turned off by any attempt to manipulate them, including setting up romantic moments. So if the dominant is the "lower desire" partner, it's very hard to end up in anything other than a dead bedroom scenario... and kink comes to the rescue.