Breaking your Man

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  1. Mascara^Snake
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    #1 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    This is a term I’ve been using for many years now. Surprisingly whenever I mention it here, people still write and ask me what I’m referring to.

    So this is a post about breaking your male sub into chastity.

    In brief; I discovered it purely by accident shortly after my man had introduced the concept of male chastity into our relationship.
    We were “experimenting” with it and he was wearing it now and then and telling me for how long he should wear it and when he needed unlocking. It was his thing and I went along with it. then there was an incident (entirely unrelated to chastity) that changed the tables.
    He did something that really upset me. As a result I decided not to unlock him when it was agreed he would be unlocked. I continued to keep him locked up even when he began complaining. I could see that it was doing him no physical harm so I just kept him locked.
    I told him that I didn’t want to hear any begging and complaining and if I did then I would extend the time he was locked.
    He realised that I was serious and he stopped complaining. I kept him locked for another week after he finished.
    It was close to a month by that stage and I think it was in the last week that I really noticed the dynamic change.
    That’s when my interest was sparked and it became more my game than his.
    I’ve known many who have tried this and experienced similar results to varying degrees and would recommend it to any new keyholder.
    It’s up to the individual to judge when to unlock him but you need to bear in mind that it has to be beyond his comfort zone and control.

    It's a little like the age old practice of breaking a horse in ready to accept a rider.
    And it will change the dynamic of your game.
     
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  2. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    #2 LesterBallard, Jun 2, 2018
    Yes, I think it's that "just outside his comfort zone" that is so important. And an element of surprise - if he doesn't know when release is coming he just has to get on and behave appropriately.
     
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  3. Mascara^Snake
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    #3 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    I don't subscribe to the idea of having a release date. I think it's better if the release depends on my mood and his behaviour.
     
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  4. Cornelius
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    #4 Cornelius, Jun 2, 2018
    Some guys have all the luck. Sorry for whatever he did to upset you, but it looks like you found the silver lining on that cloud.
     
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  5. Mascara^Snake
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    #5 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    Well yes I was pretty much just playing to his fantasy before that happened.
    The change in dynamic in that last week awakened me to the potential.
     
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  6. Digital
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    #6 Digital, Jun 2, 2018
    I always thought the idea of setting a release date at the start can put pressure on the dominant. Taking it one step at a time gives you a lot more freedom and more flexibility. You don't have to worry about breaking any promises. You can just enjoy the journey and monitoring how it affects your partner. You will know when they reach breaking point and how much more they can realistically take. He will trust and respect you for pushing him a little out of his comfort zone and supporting him through it. Just have fun and it should help bring you closer together.
     
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  7. Mascara^Snake
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    #7 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018

    it is indeed putting pressure on the dominant and at the same time impinging on their choice.
    And yes if you are punishing him by locking him for longer than is comfortable, you definitely need to be supportive and caring.
    Breaking him does not need to be a punishment at all. just a process to help get the dynamic established. The fact that it was born of punishment in my case was purely incidental.
     
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  8. Cornelius
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    #8 Cornelius, Jun 2, 2018
    From the male sub perspective, you are no longer playing, but making him live his fantasy, I hope you can make him regret ever telling you about chastity, thats where my fantasy will become reality.
     
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  9. Mascara^Snake
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    #9 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    Well to cut a long story short. he and I are no longer together.
     
  10. Cornelius
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    #10 Cornelius, Jun 2, 2018
    I just figured that out when I read your profile.
    Hopefully all is well now. I'm happy you were
    I figured that out after I posted that and I read your profile.
    I hope all is well now. Sounds like a lot of good came out it though. Nothing quite like learning you enjoy something new.
     
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    #11 Digital, Jun 2, 2018
    It is a very admirable skill when a Domme can maintain control without limiting herher opti and making false promises. It helps them stay pure and honest making them more deserving of there partners full respect and trust. He has nothing to worry about if he knows she is also caring and supportive as she guides him on his journey.
     
  12. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    #12 Rectrix, Jun 2, 2018
    To me it seems that the entire point of wearing a cage and having a keyholder is to go "beyond his comfort zone and control." The thoughts and feelings that loss of control engenders are the holy frail. The knowledge that my penis and the erection I've been so narcissistic about are no longer mine. The knowledge that I spurt freely like other men anymore. The reinforcement that I'm in a relationship and have prioritized and submitted to my wife. Allowing myself to get beyond being in control, get beyond false socialized macho, accept the submissive and feminine side of my personality -- these are the exact emotional reasons I do this. Oh, and the fact that it makes me horny like a teenager for my wife, so horny that throbbing in my cage while I worship her feels enervating. Out of control is the whole point -- break me down please, Ma'am.
     
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  13. filltee
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    #13 filltee, Jun 2, 2018
    There are a number of chastity & FLR /FD related publications that almost all emphasise that once you have established that he can wear his device and not need (or believe he needs) to be let out almost daily, then on any or even no pretext his first lengthy period of denial ought to be double what he thinks he is capable of handling.

    But again its very much dependent upon the dynamic of your relationship and how you both see that developing. Despite the strength mental and or physical of the KH the one that is being controlled has to be in agreement for TTTWD to continue to work successfully as it develops.

    There may be one or more directions either of you may be willing to explore as part of what you have and logic says not all will work for everyone what is important is that you can find a compromise that will work for you both.
     
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  14. Mascara^Snake
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    #14 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    Love it :)
     
  15. Mascara^Snake
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    #15 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    So true and this may not work for all.
     
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    #16 mcfeely, Jun 2, 2018
    Our first (last?) foray didn't go well, she wasn't doing what we had disussed and agreed on and I was having real issues with her behavior. I also expect I wasn't meeting her expectations. Our follow up discussion didn't go well and she found the device in the garbage cut into pieces. Kind of the opposite of this thread because she was super upset (was she broken?). Unlike most of the men here, I am not the one wanting chastity. I am willing and eager to "play" but flr, etc.... isn't for me. I suspect that like a lot of men here,she found out expectations and reality don't always match.
     
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    winstonmacgregor Long term member

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    #17 winstonmacgregor, Jun 2, 2018
    Have you ever introduced/put chastity on to someone that was unaware of the concept? Or at least did not initially want it?
     
  18. Mash2214
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    #18 Mash2214, Jun 2, 2018
    Breaking your man seems so harsh. What do you want someone who’s week and has no self confidence and is walked on in his public life. Or someone that is submissive to hie Mistress and serves her needs but still can be functional in the other world. What do you want a Broken man or a Controlled one, the two can be very different.
     
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  19. Mascara^Snake
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    #19 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018

    Lol, umm if you're forcing her to break you then it's not really the same thing.
     
  20. Mascara^Snake
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    #20 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    I have yes and I prefer it that way purely because he has not been infected by all the fantasy rubbish and has no prerequisites or chastity fetish needs.
     
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    #21 RangerCuck, Jun 2, 2018
    I actually read her post as "breaking" him so he could be controlled, not specifically for the purpose of having a "broken" man. Maybe she didn't mean that, but that's what I took from it.
     
  22. Mash2214
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    #22 Mash2214, Jun 2, 2018
    That would make for a very interesting and unique arrangement. It would be nice to read about. Thank You MissAmanda
     
  23. Mascara^Snake
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    #23 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    You are exactly right.
    Don't worry about what Mash has written.
     
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    #24 Mascara^Snake, Jun 2, 2018
    Mash darling if you think i'm about to start writing one of those wordy blog things in installments designed to expose my sexual experiences and preferences in their entirity for all and sundry to gorge on then I'm afraid I'm going to have to dissapoint you.
     
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    #25 Rectrix, Jun 2, 2018
    It appears to me you're being trolled.
     
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