Mental Health

Hi Goddess Gala. Really sorry to hear about your struggles. Made worse by not having access to your meds. Glad you have them back. Good you have some positive things to help see you through until your meds kick back in and your health improves. Vent on, it really does help

 

Dear Mistress, Thank you for your attention to this subject and your helpful question.

 

Hey there. I hope things start picking up for you soon now you have access to your medication again.
I've suffered from depression on and off since I was a young teenager. In 2013 I had a booster vaccination which led to a severe depressive episode which lasted almost 3 years. I was on medication and saw no real improvement and had to start looking at my lifestyle carefully to see how I could improve my quality of life.
The first thing to go was men. I had been entering unhealthy relationships and the drama that came along with them was really creating too many ups and downs. Of course the highs are great, but I'd been unwell for so long I had to start wondering how I was using the highs as a crutch and relying on sex to avoid other problems when I really didn't want to commit to a relationship. I was using men and that behaviour obviously comes with consequences.
The next thing to go was alcohol (or any other substance). This is a life changer. I've been t total for over 2 years and would never go back.
Next was regular exercise. I started swimming every week. At first I hated it. And I'm a crap swimmer. My daughter begged me to get in the pool with her each week and I'd try to avoid it with a passion. But then I started to adapt, and now I love it. I go twice a week. Im fitter than I ever have been and I have no aches or pains. Its encouraged me to keep exercising in different ways and I love feeling strong and healthy.
I've been depression free for over 2 years, probably the longest I've ever been in my life and I'm ready to start a fully committed relationship for the first time in 7 years. It has taken time. There's no quick fix. But it's definitely been worth it. X

 

I suppose everyone's different with how they want help when they're feeling low. I always like little things that remind me that people are thinking of me. My neighbour might put my bin out, or if my mum buys me cake from the bakery out of the blue.
People are often self obsessed and paranoid when they're depressed, so i suppose it's important to just listen to the mundane stuff too without trying to cheer them up and change things for them, and just know that they'll be more fulfilled and back to 'normal' when it's lifted.

 

Thanking everyone for this thread but needing to add my 2 cents:

Depression and Male Masturbation do NOT go well together......the classic escape/drop syndrome is extremely hard to break.

Thankfully chastity and female oversight are a solution.

Please take a moment to consider chastity in this light vs. the sadly classic male fantasy fulfillment that only exacerbates the problem.

A shout of appreciation to the women who undertake the challenging process of breaking males of their weakness and lack of willpower.

Thank you,
stevie

 

I was listening to the radio in the car today. The slot was actually talking about gaming addiction. One of the guests on the show spoke about his addiction and depression. In his darkest hour he decided to commit suicide. He had got as far as writing a suicide not when a friend set a text to invite him to join him and some other friends to a movie.

Just that one feind reaching out was enough to stop him ending his life.
I think being there to listen can be all that is needed at times.

 

You know what the best thing is? A hug. Followed by talking. It doesn't really matter what it's about. Something mundane or interesting, it doesn't matter. And don't worry if you just ramble on with no interaction from them. Someone in a depressive moment may not respond or even give you an indication that they are listening. But in reality they are focusing on your words as a lifeline. To get calm. To get to a happy place. To quiet the din of crazy thoughts in their head.

In my town there is a support network of people who don't know each other -at all- but make themselves available to just talk on the phone with others when they are needed.

I've battled depression and anxiety since I was a teenager. A few years ago I suffered an almost complete collapse. Similar to others, I've found certain triggers to avoid. Alcohol. Caffeine. Lack of exercise. Isolating yourself (don't be alone).

My wife had the same question- how do you help someone? Thankfully it's really easy. A hug and a chat.

 

20 odd years ago I hit a real low
I did the whole counseling and antidepressants things and both helped, especially the counseling. I was able to deal with childhood issues with a clearer head and it set me on the right road to better mental health but...one thing I've realised is that if you are susceptible to these tendancies, they can come back and bite you when things get bad again.

Over the last 4-5 years, my resolve has been tested again. The end of a long term relationship, redundancy/career change, a couple of significant bereavements, middle age angst/hair loss/weight gain etc. have all contributed.

Two things have helped massively, exercise and meditation.

The exercise part I shouldn't even have to explain. It tskes considerable effort when you're down but it's so worth it. Those endorphins really do help.
I learned to do transcendental meditation, with a mantra about 25 years ago but once the novelty wore off, I only returned to it sporadically. These days, anyone with a smartphone can do a version of it.
There are numerous apps that talk you through deep breathing, muscle relaxing exercises, before getting into the subliminal element, emphasising positive thoughts and actions.

The key is to make it part of your routine, do it every morning. It really does work and your inner strength grows day by day.

The other thing that really helps me is being creative. I've been a musician for years and am niw far too old to want to 'make it', but I enjoy writing and recording music so much. It's a big part of my life and really puts me in that 'happy place' more than almial anything else.
Hope that helps.

 

Exercise and more exercise!! I find that helps me center myself, especially if I can go to exhaustion. Seems to help me get out my head, if I’m making sense. I’ve tried meditation, but I have a horrible time controlling my thoughts. I hope everyone is doing well!!

 

I'm lucky that I've never suffered from depression but my dad battled severe depression and other mental illnesses a while ago and while the severity of it has greatly decreased it still has to be managed.

Seeing what he went through has encouraged me to take my own mental health a lot more seriously. I work in a high pressure job that's extremely stressful at times, so now I make sure that I set aside time each week to focus on mental health. It might be some form of meditation, it might be yoga or it might be something else, but I now always do something

 

A healthy diet, exercise, hug my dogs, and to live all things in balance. I created a "10 things" list to help prevent overstimulation and preserve a relaxed mind. I can only listen to, watch, or read from the ten things that I have put on this list. It helps you figure out what you truly enjoy and want to support.

 

If you're so inclined, I'd recommend reading The Beast by Tracy Thompson. A beautifully (but painfully) told memoir of her struggles with depression, from youth through professional prime. It's very much an inner story -- what life experience is like for someone with severe depression, told very effectively. I think it did a lot for my ability to empathize, and from there to comfort.

 

A couple of my thoughts.

Never, ever, let me repeat, NEVER, say anything like, so, have you gotten past your depression?

You don't really understand depression unless you have it. It isn't really that easy to explain. A friend that suffers from Bipolar disorder told me once, imagine waking up every day feeling bad, and not knowing why? That gave me insight. Even he couldn't fully understand the intricacies of his illness.

Yes, illness. Shallow minded people can accept the fact that various cancers, heart disease, diabetes are legitimate diseases of various defective organs such as the heart and pancreas. However, they can't wrap their head a round the fact that the brain is just another organ.

Our bodies are the most complicated chemical factory there is. Nothing else even comes close. If one gland doesn't produce the exact amount of chemical needed, it can be throws our system into disarray.

If your pancreas doesn't produce the right amount of insulin, and at the right time, to keep your sugars balanced, and you do nothing, you will die. So you take insulin.

If your chemistry is off, and your glands are not working correctly, you mental state suffers as a result. So you take medicines to balance or supplement your chemistry to help keep it in balance.

For some reason, some think its acceptable to do this for your pancreas, but not your brain? Those are the people that need their head examined.

People aren't "crazy". Their chemistry is out of balance. The drugs aren't for crazy people", they're for balancing out the chemistry.

With the right balance of medicine, the diabetic feels better, not perfect, but better, and the victim of depression can be helped to feel better, not perfect , but better.

Just like you wouldn't offer ice cream to a diabetic, you don't offer remarks that would offend, or belittle a dear depressed soul.

I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. I'm not crazy. But my chemistry needs a little help. I will say the medicine did help me, and continues to even now. I also will say that my situation also affected me severely, and I just had to get my head in a better space.

That's where chastity came in. The adjustment in my mental attitude with permanently locking myself in chastity was amazing. When I wilfully put myself in a position to avoid any type of stimulation, I was able to mentally refocus. No longer was I, or am I, going to allow that to happen.

Fully committing to being locked forever means I never again have to think about whether it is ever going to happen, or constantly wishing it would. That is where I was, and the unfulfilled desire is something that is so good, so constant, that a few seconds of pleasure is no comparison to the constant feeling of security and bliss that my chastity cage provides. I have no desire to unlock, no wish for anything to happen. My chastity cage is my new life.

 

I'd suggest treating the underlying medical cause of the depression, and, if effective, move off pharmaceuticals. Oftentimes the body is missing a vital nutrient affecting cellular methylation or methylation is thrown out-of-whack by a particular environmental toxin. This book Nutrient Power might be a possible place to start. https://www.amazon.com/Nutrient-Power-Heal-Biochemistry-Brain/dp/1626361282

 

Very interesting indeed. Perhaps someday chastity will be a treatment option for a variety of mental illness and your doctor will have you fitted with a custom cage that will be covered by your medical insurance.

 

I lost my Mother in 2003 and, at the same time she was in hospice care, my wife started to bleed out in her right lung and I nearly lost her. Trying to work 10+ hours a day in a high stress job, spend evenings at the hospital with my wife and make a 14 hour round trip every weekend to spend as much time with my Mother as I could in her final days drove me over the edge. The VA put me on antidepressants to help me cope. I have been off them a couple of times but am on a strong dose now because of home situations, not related to my wife, that are beyond my control. I see my shrink every other month and things stay in control and fairly well balanced.

 

Try visiting a therapist who focuses on trauma therapy. It will make all the difference.

 

We have 3 adopted kids, 2 of them have special needs due to FASD (look it up it will surprise some of you). About 18 months ago i hit an all time low, very depressed and feeling like i was failing as a husband and a dad. As I'm a "man" i did what most "men" do best and keep it all bottled up and think I'll be ok. I wasn't and i realised that when one day i was at work and my manager who is also one of my good friends at work asked how the kids were and i just burst into tears, she took me into a side room with a brew and talked to me. I let it all out at her, she sat there and listened to it all, she gave me some advice about seeing a counselor and going to my docs. I was prescribed some pills and work put me onto their medical team. I had a few sessions with a counselor and i was surprised how much it helped me.
I wouldn't ever say I'm over it as it does come back every so often. The difference is now I'm more aware of it and i don't keep things bottled up anymore.
My wife is super supportive and has been my rock through it all, she lets me vent it all at her and listen and help me through it.
The best way I've found to help someone with depression is to just be there for them.

 

A very necessary thread. Thank you for posting.

I have also suffered through depression for much of my life. I have survived many things that probably have more influence on my outlook than I can know. Once in a while it all becomes too much, and overwhelming, which is when I know I need more than anything to feed the internal hunger before it devours me. The internal hunger, as I see it, is not something that has tastes, or preferences. It is more like a timed response, like a cycle. Preemptively giving it attention from within allows me to maintain a more level headed outlook. I have achieved this mostly through exercise. Eating right helps a lot too. Above all things, respect. I can only respect myself as much as I can respect others, even if they are strangers to my day to day life. We never know what is lurking right behind the curtain of a face. Many people hide very well, in plain sight. That is why it is so important to treat people with kindness, even if you see something you do not like. Most likely too if your perception provides you negative outlook or judgments against others, you will have a similar view of yourself.