Experiences With The End Of Orgasms?

I'm in a more traditional, vanilla marriage; that is, I'm not submissive, my wife Mrs Edge isn't a domme, and except for the chastity device, we have a fairly typical marriage, so not sure if this will apply to you.

That said, we hadn't agreed last year to go long term. That is, I'd been in and out of chastity for some time previous to last March, and the length of time was always variable, although it tended to be weeks to months because we often play off each other.

Last year, Mrs Edge had me use a Vixskin "replacement" strapon (it's very, very lifelike, and the model we use is pretty similar to my own size and shape). As the months ticked over, it became clear that, while never saying it was going to be a year, that's what she was shooting for. Last month when I mentioned the year was coming around, she told me that she didn't plan to unlock me, and that it was going to go on for "at least another year."

So, I'm close to the anniversary now, and have been reflecting on this. For us, it's been an exciting and enjoyable time. I didn't ask for it, but seeing her get so excited and aroused keeps me aroused, which makes enduring the lockup much easier. Mrs Edge isn't committing to any time period, but the both of us have an agreement that we will keep going as long as it's fun for the both of us.

Long term chastity is exciting to think about, but in practice it can be boring. We have sex a couple times a week, but sometimes holidays or social events will prevent that. We're both coming off some nasty cold that was going around and we hadn't been intimate in weeks. If you're used to wanking in the middle of the night to fall back asleep, that route is now cut off (Zzquil helps). And there's still the daily maintenance (I lube with lotion in the morning and clean up in a hot shower at night). Once a month I get to remove it for a deeper cleaning, inspection, and a shave/trim, but that's two minutes in the shower. It's down to a routine, and routines aren't usually sexy.

I can tell you that I'm still aroused most of the time, and even though I know I'll be wearing my "replacement," I still look forward to making love just as much (and Mrs Edge may look forward to it even more, which could be slightly disconcerting). Again, though, the idea is that no matter how long she wants to take it (in the heat of the moment she says "forever," but who really knows) we're both enjoying it, which is key.

And again, we're an otherwise traditional, vanilla couple. You and your partner may have a different relationship that will impact your perceptions and outlook.

 

Mrs Edge and I have been at this for *coff coff* years, so this isn't my first go-around with long term denial.

Over the years I've managed to cope by somehow (and I can't tell you how) becoming emotionally satisfied by making *her* satisfied. I've long since managed to be able to sleep through the night in a device, and to enjoy the intense arousal that one gets after making love with no orgasm. At some point, I can look at Mrs Edge laying back like a quivering pile of Jello, and even though I'm still aroused, I manage to feel, I guess, satisfaction in a job well done. I've sublimated the arousal into satisfaction and enjoyment.

Not sure how helpful this is, but that's how it works for me.

 

It has its ups and downs. I didn’t really realize it until I read this thread and stopped to think about it, but it was last February the last time I was allowed an orgasm. Wow, time flies. Anyway, back to the subject; it is sometimes very, very hard and then there are other times when I really don’t even think about it.

Today is actually a hard day. All day since I woke up I have been craving an erection and orgasm. I saw my wife getting dressed today, and seeing her with her underwear off made me miss the feeling of being in her vagina so bad. She saw me staring and grinned mischievously just to rub it in.

But there are times when the feelings aren’t so intense. And there are the occasional random emissions that bring relief for a day or two, though they are never very pleasant and certainly not satisfying. Just a feeling of relief like emptying your bladder. Not having a full prostate can be nice.

Really the hardest times are when the wife doesn’t want to do anything. My only real sexual pleasure aside from the teasing she gives me is pleasuring her and enjoying her orgasms. When she doesn’t want to do anything it can be very hard to be bursting with desire and no outlet.

 

When my old friend became my KH and took over my self-locking. Some promises were made and eventually a contract that we have never felt the need to finish. We never discussed how long my period or subsequent periods of denial would be.

Through mutual agreement.
I promised I would not try and cum without permission and would take whatever steps possible to prevent an 'accident' should the need arise
Towards that end have promised at all times unless otherwise directed to wear a chastity device
I promised never to ask to be allowed an orgasm
I promised never to ask when my next orgasm would be
She promised she would never reveal when my next orgasm would be
I have promised never to ask if my denial has become permanent
She promised that If or When permanent my denial begins if it hasn't already she will not tell me. I will have to work it out for myself.
Specifically and perhaps most significantly If at any time I am allowed out of the device I have promised to put it back on if or whenever she tells me to.

there are other mutually agreed details too but not relevant to the OP.

So although we never discussed the duration of this first denial a little under 2 years I may have already started permanent denial I have no way of knowing. If I have not then there is nothing further to mention

But in that sense I; may have been taken in that direction, rather than initiated it.

If I have begun permanent denial then I can see some of the potential the advantages and or if you prefer the positives of that...for me. It will certainly be a learning experience for me. I have felt certain submissive feelings arise that were not there previously I am not averse to them and we have discussed seeing how those might develop.

Am I ready for permanent denial? I do enjoy the head-fuck that I want and sometimes that I need to experience an erection or orgasm but much prefer the feelings generated by not being allowed them and being prevented from doing so. I enjoy the frustrated attempts at getting erect in the cage knowing nothing will come of it. I enjoy feeling horny almost any time I am not fully preoccupied knowing nothing will come of that either.

My Lady enjoys my situation and being in control of it. In turn I enjoy being locked denied and controlled by someone that wants to do those things for her own pleasure.

In short I have not had an explosive or any orgasm for a long time and find that I recall what they are like I do miss them and sometimes feel I need one but I might be close to being ready to say I don't want another.

I can without reservation say I would much rather at anytime give my partner pleasure sexual or otherwise than seek my own, but that is perhaps becuase it does give me pleasure to do that.

 

The key question is not how would you cope, but do you want it in the first place? There has to be mutuality in these decisions. Are you willing to consider the idea of permanent chastity? Whether or not the answer is yes, I think you need to discuss this with your domme.

 

We have always played that my wife decides when or if I orgasm. The longest she ever took it was a little over 4 months. For me the idea that chastity time would be known, would kill some of the drama. That would be true if it were 4 dyas, 4 weeks, 4 months or never. I don't want to know that anymore than I want to know when I'll die.

I'll give you a specific example of how this played out for me once. It was only a week after I had been allowed a full orgasm. She was teasing me with the magic wand on the cage. I knew there was no way she'd let me cum again so soon, but I was enjoying it none the less. As I felt my orgasm building I warned her expecting her to stop. Instead she held it on and it was the most shockingly profound orgasms I ever had.

If the time is set, that drama and anticipation go away.

 

Fair enough. Good luck to you both.

 

After such a long time without an orgasm, do you still feel consistently frustrated or is it easier to deal with it?

 

It varies. Sometimes the frustration can be intense, sometimes it’s not that bad. I have never tracked it to see if there is a cycle, but there does seem to be at least some regularity to it. And a lot probably depends on age and health, different people are going to have different hormone levels.

There is always at least a moderate level frustration, no matter what. Even on the easiest of days I still find myself looking at my wife and wish I could be in her and have an orgasm. Sometimes those feelings aren’t very intense and sometimes they are.

 

We’re not down this path. She did keep me denied full orgasms for 88 days last year. I had crashed through the 60 day barrier based on prior experience, and started to crave the idea of being kept like that forever. She would edge me so very gently and I’d pour out slow, and spill over thick and stay hard. I adored her completely. I didn’t want to cum. I didn’t want to orgasm.

Unfortunately (?), I became both too clingy emotionally, and too sensitive physically. I started skirting away from her touch. I both held her in a needy fashion and shied myself away from being edged. She didn’t like that.

And so she gave me a full orgasm to reset my brain. I loved it but I didn’t want it at the time.

Most recently she got me to spill over just from her words (she told me I was going to wait to cum). She was thrilled.

Perhaps we can break out of my unpleasant behavior of being oddly too clingy and pushing away from her caresses. In retrospect, as I write this, I realize that I had tried to take control. And that was when she ended the experiment.

It’s apparent that she cherished the control and power over anything else. She tells me I need to be reminded sometime what I’m missing.

So permanent denial of explosive orgasms would be hard for her unless it’s something she wanted and I didn’t insert myself into the decision making. Does that make sense?

Yes. I can see it working. But you need to keep yourself actually following what she wants. I feel I slipped into being a pushy sub and made it less fun for her.

Giving up expectations fully and completely is very difficult.

 

'Mauve' ?? sorry I can't figure that one out ...

 

I thought "maybe"?

 

I am allowed a ruined orgasm once in a while, but no full blown orgasms. I don't miss it because I love the feeling of being horny all the time, and so does my wife. I get teased twice a day and I always beg her to let me cum, but she won't let me...she always knows best.

 

Oh I love that line She knows best. It's so true

 

i have been taken to the permanent chastity lately as well, so this thread is of the upmost interest. tough the « eternity » started in January, i have been denied any wanking for more than three years, with (obviously) or without a cage. i have been granted three orgasms in that span, including two through a hole carved in a grapefruit. so She has gradually prepared me for that eternity. i shall of course miss the release of the dopamine, but what i am gaining in return? the experience of a lifetime. well, the story (and the eternity ) is just in the first chapters...

 

Thank you for reading me. She definitely took me to that path, but though it is coated with what i name « the terra incognita », i fully trust Her that this decision will be beneficial for Her and for me. She once mentioned the notion of how the ennuques were very close to their masters/mistresses, though submissive they could be the confident, ally, like not even a lover could be. so far, i can say that She is very caring, pushing me to be stronger, wiser, healthier, and most of the time She is very proud of Her pet which is extremely gratifying, more powerful than a semen release...

 

Here is where I can say permanent (Yeay) without defining it. O is for over, as in no O. Never. Actually permanent nO. Not even milk and cookies. I don't miss it because being locked up (can't say permanent, because I am unlocked for hygiene only) is a lot more fulfilling. No letdown. I am always up. Irony intended. No more worries. Its just fun being in a cage, a lot more than not being in one. That just makes me crazy. I said yes to nO.
This has been my experience with "the end".

I honestly do not know the core reason why this feels so good. I know it does, and how it makes me feel, but it is kinda crazy and unexplainable. If you know, please tell me. Is it my genetic programming? Is it a mental thing that goes physical, or a physical thing that goes mental? When I first even knew about chastity, it just grabbed me. I couldn't get it out of my head until I tried it. Once I got my first device on, it was like heaven. Everything started to feel better. Its been that way ever since.