Devanillaing her

Day 14 and Madame Vanilla is tense, grumpy and a little frightening today, so Im avoiding getting in her way.
I d love to go to the bathroom and rub one out looking at some insta boobie-girls.
This is the hard reality of chastity.
I ll go for a bike ride though Id prefer to masturbate.

Ps
On another note, I ve received a fingerprint padlock to fit the current lockbox...which encloses the emergency key. I ll have to get Madame's fingerprint registered as sole operator of the new lock.

 

Day 15...and forty days during which I have come ONCE...though after snuggling this morning I played with the cage peehole and released a couple of blobs of real cum.

Madame is in a better mood today, I always want to fuck her more when shes smiley. So I suggested it.

She told me that she was ok to have a fuck only when she didn’t feel dead tired and when we are not likely to be interrupted by a child...ofcourse she has the

 

After her run this morning I knelt down in front of her as she was stripping for her shower and she let me have a full vulva kiss and lick. Delicious.
I took her panty to the laundry basket, it was soaken. Yummy.

18 days since cumming. 43 days with only one cum. Im more motivated by putting my sperm as far inside Madame Vanilla as possible rather than just cumming.

Thats what wife-controlled chastity is about, right?

 

I put the soaked and stained gusset right up over my nostrils and breathed through the damp cloth...oh I found myself on the Edge of cumming without any physical touching my body, my penis locked in steel for so long. ..I stopped myself before going over the Edge, as this was more or less plain unauthorized masturbation.
Disgusting habit. And such a nasty underhand way of doing it.
Ofcourse one could say she should not leave her soiled panties lying around...even say she should not soil them...ah no, that's wrong, right?

 

Day 21. And 46 days with just 1 full cum.
I did produce globs yesterday night that I needed to catch in a kleenex...almost a ruined cum, and it helped me sleep.
Madame was very grumpy earlier in the week, I really dont feel like fucking her at those times.
I told her she was grumpy, and she made an effort yesterday but I was still feeling down from her prior bad mood...
Difficult telling her this without being disrespectful.
But I have been gawking outside on my bike rides, and I feel bad about that.
So once again this is chastity when it feels shitty.

 

She was all nice and snuggly early this morning.
Skin soft and smooth and nipples perky.
My steel pulsing hard into her buttocks and thighs.
She stretched herself in to me.
My balls strangulated.

Then up and out cos she was hungry.

Hope the grumpiness is all gone.

 

Been up and down this weekend. Pulsed my steel into her thigh early morning.
Have only cum once in 48 days.
Sort of losing the want and desire to cum, infact Im no longer sure what it feels like.
For sure Madame Vanilla doesn’t think much about my locked cock nor that I haven't cum for a record time. Infact it is of NO importance to her.
When she's fine and ready she ll have me cum inside her, but who knows when. Could be at Christmas.
Sort of quite funny that I would beg and plea to get to this point. Funny, right?

On another note I had 2 sexualised dreams last night, though I didn't cum in the cage. One dream was of a girl I knew as a teen 45 years ago, whom I wanted to have sex with but never happened....?

 

25 days since my last cum.
50 days with just 1 cum, and that was with Madame Vanilla's vagina swallowing me and squeezing the gewy fruit out until the cock was all squished.
In fact she pounded me in an unforgettable way.
And now I await excitedly my next pounding.

I did clean up yesterday unlocked...but even when I thought of masturbating I kept control...just a couple of globs...

 

My mind is more and more scrambled...the cock tries to erect when my wife just talks to me.
I soooo luv her body.
Shes done something funny with her pubes, its super bushy but all teeny weeny.
I can t stop thinking of her vagina swallowing and snatching the cock so tightly.

Shes just not bothered about the cock never cumming.
Initially she was quite worried that it would harm me, but I explained that there is no physical necessity for the cock and balls to cum.
So it may be a long while. Shes just not bothered.

 

52 days with just 1 cum.
It was a delight and has stuck in my mind every minute for the last 4 weeks.
Madame Vanilla climbed on top of me and engulfed my cock with her vulva and pumped me hard while her vagina sucked out my gooey seed and made me groan and suffocate while she quietly whimpered; and then ejected the squished fruit and then spat out the goo down her inner thighs.

Im not really interested in other women, insta fitties, porn...and masturbating as before chastity. I just await that jewel of a moment when my wife will decide she needs filling up by her husband.

And that does encourage me to be a good husband. Though my mind is scrambled as I realise I may not be cumming until Christmas...however I will beg her if it gets that long.

 

Wife's mood is down since midday yesterday.
Now I am not the cause and I seem unable to offer a remedy. Yuck. Feel like taking the steel off and rubbing one out.

 

Her mood is back up.
I look at her legs in her minishorts, and I want to fuck her, says he with the cock fighting the steel cage.

 

Gone astray for the last couple of weeks.
Have a cumbersome houseguest until tomorrow so nothing sexual going on.
Saw Madame in a cotton flannel shorty when she got out of bed and realised what a beautiful camel toe she has.
Wanted to masturbate but didn’t. ..I d like her to lock me up.

 

Sex in bed this morning. First time in a long while she has wanted it and taken it....2 maybe 3 months!
I locked up afterwards. Haven t yet gotten the key back in her hands.
Realising that I must learn to have sex with her on her terms ie 4 times a year.
I feel so good giving her what she wants. And I so WANT HER. I cant keep my eyes off her perky nipples and her rump. So good for our marriage.

Last few weeks been masturbating and looking at porn and instagram fitties. So bad for our marriage.

 

I got fed up with 2 weeks of her being grumpy and uninterested so I stole the key and unlocked early October. Nothing I could do when real life stressors take hold.
So I masturbated daily to an instagram stream of fitness babes.
Funny thing is I do it compulsively without any real need, just in search of relief that it doesn't actually bring.
And she said nothing...and I resented the whole thing.
I guess we are still learning how to keep me locked, chaste and respectful.

 

This morning I asked to kiss her beautiful BALD puss.
Yum. Cock strained against steel.

 

Been a long while, unlocked.
Madame Vanilla thinks it would be bad for my health for her to lock me, despite all my arguments to the contrary.

Still need to have another discussion. I dont think she wants to have any more Piv, or very rarely. Her vagina is drier and less supple leading to a slight pain last time we did.

So we have had no sex or physical contact since November.
Sometimes we have a short hug in the bathroom.

I locked up today for the first time in over 6 months and before going out to the store I left her the keys in the shower room with a post-it asking, pretty much pleading for her to keep the keys hidden for a few days and to appreciate the change in my attentiveness.

When I got back she was wearing a sexy sundress and those keys were gone. I immediately checked her bedside drawer to see if they were just ...out of the way...but nope, she has put them in a secret place.

And she has not stopped TELLING me what I should do to help her. So she seems to be digging the challenge of upgrading my attentiveness.

And I cant stop wanting to touch her body.

We ll see how this time plays out.

 

I was reading through a post here that points out that male chastity is not about the cock and balls but about focussing on the Lady's needs.
I think I might be beginning to understand.
I am deliberately trying to think less about the cage and content and more about helping Madame and being affectionate to her.
She let me snuggle this morning. She is very beautiful. I am so lucky. I forget that when Im unlocked.

 

Lying naked in bed this last night next to my beautiful wife with my hand on her butt...I've been forgetting what a privilege this is. Worth much more than a 5 second masturbation to pornographic 2-D images.
Here are my 5 senses being fed by this woman.
How did I forget?
A liitle bit of spooning this morning then she went for her run....I wrung my brain and went to empty the dishwasher, clean her specs, and get her breakfast ready.
Wow feels good.
Not thinking about the cage and content.

Yesterday we celebrated 15 years together with chocolate cake and pink champagne. Then we watched her favorite show and I caressed her calves commenting on how her skin is so soft.

I DO hope she is noticing the difference with before. I will ask her after a week locked.

 

I am intrigued if having suggested this time round that she hold my keys "for a few days" instead of an open-ended plea will releave the pressure on her...

 

My balls are full now, so they are up to their dirty mind games like waking me in the middle of the night, and dribbling through the poor squished cock.
See Im thinking of myself and not of Her.
Thats the change I must make this time around.