1st time doing chastity as Alpha male...guidance please!

It's a conundrum. Those of us that are in a powerful position in the world most need the feeling of submission when we are with the person we are most vulnerable to. Seems like we need the relief from having control. But I also think we deeply enjoy the thrill of not having control and not knowing what will happen next. I often think of it like a coaster ride. Once the steel bar locks down on you and it pulls out to the click, click, click part of the track....you know you are going to ride it all the way to the end and you have no idea what twist and turn you have coming your way.

You can be as alpha as you want, but our biological libido forces us, even makes erotic the vulnerability we experience from the charms of a woman. Personally, I think this was evolutionary required for civilization to take hold. Otherwise our nature would be too destructive for civilization to prosper.

My wife had to see how much chastity made me focus on her and had to read to understand our biology. Funny how women are just as uncertain about what makes us tick as we are uncertain about what makes them tick. However chastity can break those barriers over time, but it does take time. Eventually your KH will put 2 and 2 together....than good luck ever getting out of chastity.

 

Well the good news is she hasn't freaked out about it.

Be careful not to try to go too fast too soon. Chastity when she is out is a great idea. Let her see the positives. Let het come to her own conclusion. Don't force the issue.

Have a chat about it, but don't try to push her. Sell the benefits but keep it low key.

Good luck

 

Hello and welcome to chastity mansion! Good luck in your journey!

I’m a alpha male as well. Manufacturing/Management job! Have to be competitive! In charge of many people! I used to come home all worked up! Sex was for my pleasure. She is very submissive and I didn’t care about wife’s pleasures. Realized that was wrong!!! Experimented with chastity! Basically told her I’ll be the alpha male in your life but you will be the alpha female in our bedroom! She loved the idea! Today, I still make critical decisions with her input, but she definitely has control in the bedroom! She is happy!

I’m not locked all the time like some guys love to be. I’m taking it slow with my wife! When she’s feeling frisky or wants sex for a special occasion, she usually has me lock up in advance. I never know when I’m going to be released and I’m not allowed to ask either! Most of time she keeps me locked for 7-10 days!

 

I think just as many wives would prefer NOT to have to ask us to take the trash out, just as many (in proportion) would prefer not to have to ASK us to lock. My wife rarely asks me to lock, but she always appreciates it when I do.

In fact, her comments are more like "why aren't you locked?"

 

When I got my piercing, had to be cage free for ahile. My wife was persistent about getting me back in the cage. She likes that husbund far better and she enjoys ramping up the teasing to keep husband focused.

 

Lock up give her the keys and hand her $50 and say have fun with the girls. Worst she's gunna do is take the 50 and have fun with the girls. But she may send u a picture of the keys to tease you. Just be careful she don't try to rip the cage off when she comes home all hot and bothered.

 

I think the whole alpha thing gets thrown around to much. We aren't pack animals, we are complex animals that trough trial and error develop a society structure that works for the most part. All that being said there's no wrong or right way to do this. There's a couple submissive things I like. Being locked for me isn't a time challenge either, I like being locked till she wants to fool around. Just my two pence

 

I might be locked, but I am no.1 in charge at work. If anything i feel more confident in the knowing that my relationship with my wife is probably closer and better than the lot of them. I'm still an egotistical alpha out of the house, and sometimes in the house, it has just made me focus more on her. For men less is more when it comes to ejaculation. Edge all you like, but the intensity of the edging and only coming every 5 or so days (usually for me, though I'm on 8 at the moment) is so worth the wait.

 

When the Zombie apocalypse comes, I would eat you alive. Lol

 

Look on holytrainer cage (holytrainer V4 small). YOu can check some on Aliexpress. From my experiences its much better than CB600S

 

I agree. I have the standard, small and nano. I'm usually in the small and 2nd largest ring. Hardly know it's there most of the time and it is really simple and no pinching to put on

 

Joey, you're uncertainty is the confusion of your exterior alpha role and your interior recognition of your desire to be submissive with your fiancee. 100% through-and-through alpha guys don't get the "urge" to try chastity or buy themselves a pink cage. You're recognizing and coming to accept as you mature that your interior personality is multi-faceted and you're accepting that you want to share it with your fiancee and not keep that part of yourself secret from her. This is not something that will go away, and it's wonderful that she accepts this side of you; believe me, if she was horrified or thought you were less than the man she loves she would have told you that already. Instead, she's playing along because she sees it's in her interest to develop this submissive, attentive, vulnerable side of you -- a side most women wish their man exposed. The bottom line here is that it's *you* who needs to accept and expose yourself. The submissiveness or beta side you feel is real. You can acknowledge it and live it and share it with her, and still be a leader in your job. Indeed, knowing yourself better may make you a better leader, just as it makes you a more honest lover. Good luck.

 

Had a PA piercing a year ago n have been uncaged since. Few weeks ago I locked up n told my wife, Hold these for me. Ive def missed that achy ball feeling! Now looking for a light wgt pa chastity device.
Joey: just start wearing it full time. Find a comfortable one n wear 24/7 as much as you want. Dont make a big deal of it with her n keep it low key(pun intended! Lol) like anything else this too will soon pass. She’ll soon accept that you enjoy being locked n that it only benefits her. You’ll be so horny n willing to do anything for her that you just may spoil her! (Most probly) Be careful what you reap!
Nothing Dom/Fem in our 33yr marriage just 51/49 n she def knows she holds the balls in the family!
Hoping you both enjoy your chasity!

 

Check in with her and ask her how she feels about it. Let her go first. This shows that you care about what she is feeling and what she has to say.

As to be 100% Alpha or 100% Beta/ Submissive... It is a lie.

No one is 100% of Anything.

It's Yin and Yang.

Its like a coin where one side is Alpha and one side is Beta.

We are all shades of BOTH sides of the same coin.

Keep talking to and checking in with not only her, but yourself as well.

Life is a journey of discovery and change. Enjoy the journey.

Iso.

 

Didn't read all of your post, but will say, try be in that with open mind and enjoy the fun .
U will love it

 

I was almost gonna call bullshit about no 100% alpha would lock himself up. "Well I'm not having a pink one!" As I was puffing up in my head, thinking "Well I did!". Then I thought about it some more, and agree, great post. Iso puts it well too. "No one is 100% of anything"

I have a feeling you're gonna be fine mate.

 

Hello, first off welcome to the mansion.!! seems like yo

Hello welcome to the mansion.!!!

first a good age to try it you both being young and etc. but like everyone said so far yes go slow and go day by day and hope it will stick but im glad she seems to be enjoying it so far which means thats a good thing.!!! i dont think this will affect your relationship at all being she seemed to like it so i feel this will just add more to it overall. Also i like you got the cage in pink hehe. but i like the lock in lust cages better than the cb 6000s ones. but good luck and enjoy but most importanly have fun.!!!!!

 

Why do you want to be caged?

For me, I was masturbating too much and wanted help leaving it alone during, or certainly toward the end of her period. There had been complaints about lasting too long and making her sore, which makes the situation worse, as then she's not on the mood. She accepted me wearing all the time to help with that and then I started developing other deeper feelings of devotion to my wife. The effect was very quick and profound, and still developing. Feels weird without it now. I blogged the first three months quite thoroughly, but since the new year didn't write much.