Limited or denied blowjobs?

Before chastity, my wife always sucked my cock to make it harder, and especially liked sucking both my balls in her mouth and pulling them away from my straining cock. Since chastity, nothing, ever -- when he's caged he doesn't get hard. When he's allowed out it's because she wants to use him for her pleasure. I think chaste submissive men need to realize that alpha men get their cocks sucked, and that women know they don't have to and shouldn't suck a submissive guy's dick. It's really kind of inappropriate, it might confuse a submissive guy or make him forget his place. In a chastity relationship, oral sex is the core of wife worship; chaste husbands don't get blowjobs.

 

To be fair to my Wife, She told me when we first started having sex when we were dating that she did not like oral sex (either giving or receiving,) and that her prior boyfriend had ended their relationship because of this.

So I had fair warning.

 

At the same the she told me about tantric sex practice of men not ejaculating. I wasn't ready for that for many years.

 

It's both amusing and sad to see the gatekeeping in the sex community. Oral sex is not inherently a submissive act. A lot of women (like men) enjoy giving pleasure to their partner. Mrs Edge used to be fairly enthusiastic about this, and in getting me worked up, it would arouse her as well. Similarly, she enjoyed getting me worked up with her hands, because who doesn't enjoy seeing their partner writhe and squirm around the bed?

Obviously, being permanently locked means that I don't get them anymore, but that's because Mrs Edge has adopted (rather easily, I might add ) the mindset that she gets all, or at least 90% of the pleasure in our lovemaking.

But the idea that subs don't get oral is something made up by somebody and passed along as some kind of rule that people follow for no good reason.

 

"She gets all, or at least 90% of the pleasure"? Now I don't believe that for a minute! The pleasure you receive from pleasing your better half is more than 10% I'm sure. The sheer joy of your partners orgasms and the unbeatable feeling of your own frustration must surely be on par with her pleasure! Indeed, I have said on this forum before that I get as much pleasure from Mrs Chaste orgasms as she does! Oh and just for the record, no blowjobs in the last 6 years!

 

Well, I guess that I should have been more specific that she gets the physical pleasure. Naturally, I get a lot of emotional pleasure in giving her so much physical pleasure.

 

I know exactly what you mean! Do you find that the "physical pleasure" you receive from your own orgasm really doesn't measure up to the "emotional pleasure" of being left "gagging for it" after she has had her pleasure? Odd creatures us humans!

 

Since being locked, I have received MORE oral attention. She uses the act as a tease leading to denial. It is disturbingly effective, and she loves my frustration.

 

My last attention down there I had won a bet. It was her idea so I thought when she lost I was going to get some mind bending way overdue oral. She spent about 1 minute down there and said “ ok lock up”. I whined a bit about a bet was a bet and got “ you didn’t think I was gonna let you cum in my mouth did you?! No cum goes in yours not mine” and a cute little laugh.

Next bet will be more specific lol

 

In pretty much every iteration I've seen of this topic on any forum, the general response seems to be: the meaning of the act depends upon the people engaging in it.

Generally, I look at the person who gives oral sex as similar to a person who gives a massage: they're in charge of the recipient's comfort, safety (consider where the giver's teeth are), and pleasure (depending on the type of massage, of course). The recipient can direct the giver's movements, or lie back and concentrate on simply feeling. The spin one puts on it, the attitude one brings to it, and the role one acts out is up to each person / couple.

I detest the taste of semen, so I could live merrily without a guy ever coming in my mouth again. However, I do like giving blow jobs ... in a dominant manner.

I've asked enough questions about preferences and experiences, read enough, taken enough classes, and experimented enough to know that I'm quite good at it. (Granted, different people have different preferences, but in general I do okay.) I have noticed something interesting, though: the more I please myself while performing fellatio, the more my partner enjoys receiving it. I think one can feel a difference between talent + enthusiasm vs. talent + running on automatic:

• my "automatic" behavior usually involved getting a bit tired of holding my mouth in such a way that my teeth wouldn't be an issuing, bobbing my head, and waiting for a guy to come ... but being bored.

• my "fun" behavior involves tuning into his sounds, his breathing, and his motion, and then easing off or being more intense depending on where he seems to be, stopping to use my hands on his cock, balls, or taint while I lick rather than suck, apply a gentle pressure with my molars without moving my head (thus avoiding the dreaded accidental scrape), murmuring a little dirty talk or an evil chuckle, etc., and thus staying engaged, and stopping when I'm just too tired or want to do something else.

Submissive cocksucking, to me, involves waiting for it to be over while experiencing jaw ache, and dreading a mouth full of something I consider nasty-tasting. Dominant cocksucking involves actively playing with my favorite toys, becoming low-level tease and denial play that doesn't involve me being the one to lick up anything.

I can't speak for other people's experiences of performing fellatio, but I've realized that when I'm more "dominant" in cocksucking I enjoy it far more. I've also noticed my partner's get quieter and move less when I slip into automatic mode, and become louder and more physically active when I engage more - thus suggesting that they're more fans of cocksucking when I own it as a fun activity rather than just as something I'm doing for them.

 

My wife gave me a blowjob in October, as a stress relief to her, during a very difficult time. It was a complete surprise.

That was 5 months and 10 days ago. I hadn’t had one in the 2 years, 8 months and 12 days prior. I thought they had implicitly become off the table.

I still remember it, as I wrote about how good it was. It was like she ripped a demon from my body.

My prior one was January 2017. I wrote how long it had been then since the last two in 2016. I didn’t know I’d go over 2.5 years until the next one.

“1st time in forever. I said don't stop and she slowed down to a crawl and released her grip. Extended my orgasm out. I spilled over and I begged her not to stop. She kept sucking and licking until my true orgasm hit. Fuck I've missed that.

I came so loudly the neighbors dogs started barking.

Then she locked my cock up in chastity and took the key. ❤”

I ended up being denied orgasms for a (then) record 70 days soon after. She had me promise that she’d own all my pleasure indefinitely during that long tease and denial. Later she made her control over my masturbation and orgasms permanent, telling me there’s no backing out now.

I do remind her of how good her oral skills were and are. And how much I enjoyed it. She likes hearing it. She used to take pride in her cock swallowing and deep throating skills. Now she loves to smirk in response and doesn’t move to wrap her luscious lips and talented tongue around my cock anymore.

I do miss her mouth. I really do. But she says the frustration is good for me.

 

Blow jobs were nearly always a start to sex. Not any more though since chastity came along.

 

Well, since I'm never unlocked anymore, my only orgasms are ruined ones in my cage (although once in a while Mrs Edge will encourage one along that feels 90% like a "real" one). That said, over the last few years, I've discovered that I get almost all the feelings that I used to have: the buildup, a mindless pleasure, and a refractory period when she's had enough.

I like to say that I get pretty much everything except the 10 seconds of fireworks.

 

Preach my man. There are so many femdom and submisisve-male clichés/tropes that get pushed on newbies as if there is only one way to do it right. But that's a whole different discussion topic...

Anyway, my wife is one of those who genuinely enjoys giving blowjobs and is really turned on by cum. So we're in a weird spot where a 24/7 chastity arrangement takes some enjoyment away from her. And since cuckolding is off the table, I definitely have to meet her half way.

As a result, blowjobs still happen, albeit less frequently than they used to. However, this is more related to the hygiene challenges that go along with long-term chastity wear. Before blowjobs could be spontaneous, whereas now things need to happen in just the right order... First, we both need to be aroused, which sounds obvious but busy schedules often keep us out of sync. And since she won't put her mouth on a cage that I've been wearing for a while, a blowjob can really only happen on a day when I've either earned an unlocking or have one scheduled. Once the cage is off, I have to shower immediately to make sure everything is clean for her...not exactly a "quickie" process.

 

She has made it clear that she doesn't really like giving blowjobs, and the ones I got in the past were just her trying to please me. They don't happen anymore, and I honestly don't miss them since I was never too enthusiastic about them.

 

I am not permitted blow jobs any more, or any sex with my madam, that is reserved for her bull, I am permitted edging when I have been exceptionally good, apart from that it’s anal stimulation only for me.

 

On Jan 4th, she put her lips on me for 20 seconds. Nothing since. I recently asked her when my next one was going to be. She said, "you’ve had your 20 in 2020. That’s it. Don’t expect anything more"

last year she did it three times for a minute or less. She was surprised when I told her that. But she said, "eating me is far more of a priority." And walked away.

 

This whole thread makes me sad. When I was in my late teens / early 20's, if I had any idea how negative the general female population of the world is regarding blowjobs, I would have married that one woman who could suck a tennis ball through a garden hose and dealt with whatever downside may have come with that particular relationship. Out of my 28 1/2-year marriage, she took a 20-year break in the middle, and that was before I discovered and tried to introduce her to male chastity. Another reason I am surprised that she hasn't embraced MC with more enthusiasm.

Given the amount of gusto the male population has for eating pussy (especially when locked!) you'd think the corollary would be true.

 

I'm not allowed blow jobs and I'm not even in chastity. But I don't care as I can still have regular sex.

 

My wife hasn't gone down on me since the 80's. My keyholder would never go down on me. My wife did allow me freedom to explore my kink side though, and I had many amazing blowjobs, up until a few years ago. Now my dick is just something to pee with, and I'm good with that, because I had so much freedom in the past. She knows I got head, and used it for sex during kink, and that's part of why she's agreed with my keyholder that I stay chaste from now on, including with her. She occasionally likes getting oral, but it's mostly dildo's and harnesses. My keyholder is queer, and has occasionally worn a dildo for me to worship and experience things orally from that perspective.

 

Yes I do this too when I feel like it, especially when my sub is beggin to cum. He only gets more frustrated from it, which is fun for me.

I am the only one allowed orgasms when I want them, but I do like oral sex and give it when I feel like it.

 

Lady Kat used to give me blow jobs often when we started dating. But since chastity came into our lifes 11 years ago that has completely stopped. I accept the fact i will never receive another blowjob. Now i deep throat her strapon every chance i get.