Thrills and hardships of a man wanting permanent lock up

Day 14, no orgasm
What started out as a promising morning ended on a let down, not for me but for My Love.
I was awakened this morning to My Love gently brushing her hand up and down my morning wood, when she realized I was awake she whispered for me to grab Her Magic Wand, She used it on me until She decided She wanted to have me inside Her. With the help of Her Wand and property She quickly brought Herself to Her first orgasm and me to edge, I dare not orgasm as My Love is never satisfied with one, however being so close was amazing.
My Love continued to grind herself on Her property along with Her Wand, nearing her second orgasm the phone rang! It was Her work, they needed Her to go in early, incredible let down for Her but an incredible stroke of luck for me!
I was blessed to watch Her enjoy using Her tools to achieve one orgasm and lucky enough to get me to the edge for an incredible feeling of pure joy and yet continue my streak of denial.
My high is incredible today, so frustrated yet so happy!

 

Day 15, no orgasm.
My Love will be away for the weekend, I am to stay home and finish a project I am working on, new deck for our hot tub, and take care of our dog.
It's a long weekend here in Canada so I will be going to at least 18 days without an orgasm, happy about that even though I feel like I could explode. I'll need to stay busy so my mind doesn't get the best of me.
I do have a list of other tasks to complete this weekend, we will be updating that list prior to Her leaving.
Here's to a wonderful weekend following instructions and working to see a smile on My Loves face when she returns!

 

I had a nice evening tonight, tackled a few of the tasks I was given. In my part of the world we are going through a heat wave, well into the high 30's Celsius, without the humidex. I decided to take a skinny dip in our pool before going to bed. With the water being so warm and the thrill of being naked I got a little excited, that's when I realized I've never swam with my cage on, so I got out and put it on and jumped right back in, it was amazing.
For me, self locking is not as exciting/frustrating as when My Love instructs me to lock up but the feeling of floating in our pool with nothing on but my cage was so relaxing. It's such a beautiful night and I felt so content, only thing missing was the Love of my life. I'm going to bed now, caged, relaxed, in love and wanting nothing more than to see My Love when She returns with all I was instructed to do completed! Lots to do tomorrow.

 

Day 16, no orgasm.
Felt so good this morning to waking up feeling my bulge trying to break out of my cage, it seems like forever since I've been locked up, I enjoy it so much.
The high I am feeling this morning is amazing, I know that most of you will understand when I say that my entire body aches for relief, releif meaning I want to spend the day doing exactly what My Love wants.
I have my list of chores and have full intentions on completing them. It is one of those mornings where I would love nothing more than to kneel at her side while She pets my head like the Sub I desire to be, spending the day taking care of Her every need.
Enjoy your day CM, I hope all of you are feeling the joy I am!

 

Day 17, no orgasm.
I spoke with My Love this morning the conversation went like this;
ML "Have you masturbated this weekend?"
Me "No, you didn't give me permission"
ML "Are you serious about the whole asking to jerk off?"
Me "Absolutely"
ML "Have you edged yourself"
Me "Again, you never said I could"
ML "How long has it been since you had an orgasm?"
Me "today is day 17"
ML "are you frustrated yet"
Me "A little but I'm fine with that"
ML "Are you wearing your cage?"
Me "Yes, I know you think I'm a little attached to it, but I enjoy wearing it and it's easier to control my erections therefore my temptation to masturbate is not as bad"
ML "Tell you what, spend some time this morning in your cage watching some porn and edging yourself, if you get the things I asked you to do you can play with your toys this evening, ill check on you later"
So.....after getting aroused by porn and frustrated with an edging session, I am now off to get my chores done, I'll keep you all posted if I have earned some play time.

 

So, as I posted Sunday, My Love instructed me to watch porn and edge myself. Throughout the day She would text me to see how I was doing and encourage me to edge a couple times, it was nice.
Shortly after dinner time She asked about my chores, I did have them completed so She allowed me to clean myself up and play with my toys, I was told, "no orgasm but if your dildo happens to make you leak from your cage that's okay, have fun"
So I proceeded to take a bath and clean myself up for toy play. I crawled into bed with my favourites, turned on some porm and began to play with myself. It wasn't long after I really began to enjoy myself that I heard some noise, before I could move our bedroom door swung open, there I was laying with my legs spread and a toy up my hole and someone was standing it the doorway, was I ever happy to see it was My Love! She surprised me and came home a day early!
As She entered the room, She told me not to stop, she reached in Her drawer to get her nightgown, again looking at me said "Don't stop, I'm gonna run a bath, you can come wash me when you need a break."
Needless to say I was quite embarrassed, even though My Love knows I play with toys, She has never caught me, however this was a setup, She knew she was coming home and She wanted to catch me.
Knowing all this I still couldn't play with my toys while She was in the next room, I would feel uncomfortable so as She was running her bath I ventured into the bathroom to express to Her my embarrassment. She agreed it was a complete set up, She wanted to know if I followed instructions when She was away. My Love told me I had nothing to be embarrassed about and if it feels good why not enjoy it! She said "Come on, while my bath is running I'll toy you for a bit!"
I got on all fours and She slide my toy in and out of me while her bath ran. When she left our room she asked that I get Her restraints ready, then come and wash Her back.
After Her bath she tied me up, put on her strap on and proceeded to use me for Her pleasure, once She was satisfied with hammering me, She pulled out inserted my plug climbed on top of me and proceeded to have three orgasms, with the help of Her Wand, once she was satisfied, She took her Wand and rubbed it on the sweet spot of my hardness and edge me a number of times before She allowed me a orgasm!
It was an incredible surprise that She came home to surprise me, and even more incredible was how She used me. I thanked Her, as always!
Day 2, no orgasm

 

I don't get that treatment as often as I would like but I sure do enjoy it when I do!

 

Day 4, no orgasm.
It has been a nice few days, very hot so we have been spending quite a bit of time in our pool, We are somewhat secluded from eyesight with our fence so My Love insists once I get in to take my shorts off and throw them in the middle of the deck, she knows that I am somewhat of an exhibitionist, although not to the general public however I do get somewhat of a thrill knowing I could get caught.
My Love has the ability to get herself to orgasm with the pressure from the pool infeed after the pump, not sure if that's the best way to explain it, its kinda like a jet in a hot tub, anyhow the night before last as I sat on the deck, I had the opportunity to watch Her get herself off that way, what an incredibly lovely sight to watch Her be pleased, there is nothing more that I enjoy.
Last evening was slightly different, we were both in the pool and I was holding Her in my arms, She asked that I carry Her to the jet, I held Her in position while She brought Herself to a wonderful orgasm, again so beautiful to watch and I was given the privilege to hold Her and feel Her body twitch as the feelings of that orgasm ran through Her body.
I don't believe I could ever cukhold, I know My Love wouldn't, if She did it would be with another woman, She has already told me of that fantasy, but I often wonder if I enjoy watching Her please herself so much wonder if I would be turned on watching Her enjoy another individual, be it man or woman.

 

Thank you @Mash2214!
My commitment to this lifestyle grows every day, it was not that long ago that I realized that my selfishness was getting in the way of our relationship blossoming into what it is becoming.
My commitment to My Love and her needs has never been stronger and it continues to grow every day, as does our relationship.
The more I read up on this type of lifestyle the more it mesmerized me and my curiosity got the best of me. So I purchased my first cage, when it arrived and I showed it to My Love She was not interested at all.
One day while I was away for the weekend, She jokingly said "I should have made you wear that cage you bought" I quickly sent her a picture with me wearing it, that is when her interest started. I purchased a Key Holder Guide for Her and She read it and was curious so we began our journey, we have had some bumps in the road but I believe it to be shaping up rather nicely.
I am not under lock and key as much as I would like to be, I truly do understand Her reasoning as to why She does not wish for that, however it is becoming more frequent.
The hardest part for me to learn was that I was being selfish even though I didn't realize it, this site helped me open my eyes to that, and I continue to try to distance myself from that part of me.
The feeling I get when I have been without for a span of time yet seeing My Love still enjoying my touch is the greatest gift I could ask for. I continue to grow and continue to learn how to direct my entire self to being the best Sub I can be without forcing Her to do anything She is not comfortable with, She must understand and grow as well, She must learn that I am truly devoted to Her and there is nothing I want or need in return.
This journal helps me express my feelings to like minded individuals and allows me to get different opinions and perspectives on the issues we all face on a daily basis, as I have read here many times, this was my choice and not Hers it is a choice I do not regret.
Thanks for following.

 

Day 8, no orgasm.
Wow, where to begin..it was a great weekend. Friday night was a quite one, some pool time and a few glasses of wine. We ended the hard work week with a complete body massage prior to bed, my erection was quite noticeable.
Saturday morning, the usual coffee in bed for my Love served nude, we had and dinner and dance to attend that evening so instead of Her normal foot massage, I was honoured to paint Her toenails that morning, that's one of my biggest turn ons. Afterwards we had a nice breakfast and enjoyed the day by the pool.
Sunday morning was again our typical routine, coffee and foot rub, we then travelled to visit some family for the afternoon, we had a great discussion on the way regarding the night she wanted. It had been awhile, she felt, that we enjoyed each other. She told me that when we get home She wanted me to trim and shave Her property, "I'll be needing that tonight"
When we got back home, we had a couple drinks by the pool until I was instructed to get back in the house and take care of Her request. Once I was finished she came back in, told me to show Her the job I did. She made me stand there while She inspected me, since I've told Her how that kind of turns me on inspections are happening more often, She noticed my arousal as She circled me I was also given a couple spanks, She kissed me and told me She was satisfied with the job I did. She then instructed me to fold the laundry while she took Her bath. I was allowed to wash Her back and dry Her off, as I was kneeling in front of Her, She requested I give Her a kiss down below, "No licking, just a couple kisses, kissing it shows respect" Wow! She does get into this at times.
When we got to our bedroom, a full body massage for Her was required. Afterwards She instructed me to get the Wand and lay in my back with my legs spread, after she seen my stiffness She positioned Herself between my legs, layer on her back and brought her beautiful shaven self right up towards her property, She began to masturbate with the Wand all the while holding my stiffness up against it as well quickly bringing me to the edge, She orgasmed 3 times never once allowing me inside Her, only stroking and vibrating me to the edge over and over, finally She looked at me and told me to clean Her up, once again bringing Herself to orgasm with my oral stimulation. After catching Her breath She asked if I was okay, if I wanted to ejaculate, I said "No Thank you, having you edge me for that long and witnessing your four orgasms, as long as you are satisfied so am I"
We then rolled over closed our eyes and fell asleep.

 

I have always kept myself smooth and well trimmed, there is no other way

 

Thruthfully...No!
What's more surprising is how, at one time, ejaculating was all I thought about! I much prefer the thoughts that go through my mind now.

 

Day 10, no orgasm.
Difficulties this morning controlling my erections, seems like I walk and just my jeans rubbing up against it arouses me.
As we progress on this journey I must admit that My Love is really starting to try to understand this whole orgasm denial/chastity/flr lifestyle. We are having more and more discussions about it, it is Her who seems to bring it up.
Last evening while we enjoyed an after supper glass of wine, She began asking questions about why I choose to abstain from ejaculating and how only satisfying Her allows me to be sexually fulfilled. She asked why I get excited when I get a list of chores, She told me that She can tell how much I enjoy it, to the point She said "Your eyes light up when I boss you around and call you My Bitch".
I did my best to explain, it is sometimes difficult because I don't always know why I am the way I am, all I truly know is that all I want is to please and satisfy My Love and be the best husband I can be. I asked Her not to judge me and label me "weird".
"Quite the opposite" She said "I love the attention. I love when my friends tell me they are jealous of how attentive you are" I was very happy to hear that.
Even though My Love doesn't understand She told me She is "willing to play the part" as She does see the advantages and benefits in it for Her. She told me that those types of discussions are helpful in trying to wrap her head around everything. It was truly a great conversation. I am feeling closer to My Love than I ever have
Afterwards, My Love took Her bath, I was allowed to wash Her back and dry Her off, one of my favourites, again she laughed at how hard I get when I do that. I showered and when I went to the bedroom My Love surpringly called me to her side of the bed told me to stand and turn for an inspection, as I turned I received two hard slaps on my backside, I completed my turn and my erection was obvious. My Love began to orally bring me to edge, once I got there she kept me there for some time, when she was finished she turned me around gave me a couple taps in my backside again.
As She laid back in bed, I was told to kneel on the floor beside her, She began to pet me and said "Good boy, you can kneel while your erection subsides". I crawled in bed when I regained some composure rubbed My Loves back as we fell asleep.

 

My Love truly is an exceptional woman, I adore her immensely.

 

i agree @Breathe, the support and encouragement I see on this site is amazing!

 

Thank you, I agree that we share some common interests @_and_smile.

 

Day 11, no orgasm
It's been a great day so far!
We were up a little earlier than usual, I was responsible for getting the coffee as per the usual routine, My Love decided She wanted to play with Her property this morning, not getting me to the edge, just some nice fondling enough to get me erect, which is not difficult in my current frame of mind.
Afterwards we got ready for work, and kissed each other goodbye. My Love will be away again this weekend, I know it seems She is away often, without getting into details there are unusual circumstances causing us to be go in different directions on the weekends but that will end soon.
Anyhow, when I got to work it didn't take long for the first text to come through. First off She told me She was wearing my favourite pants, She looks amazing in those. I was then told about how She had no underwear on, and it went on like that for well over 20 texts telling me about all the things She wants to do to me. I asked her to stop because she was getting me going, She said that was the idea!
After a while My Love told me She would wait for me before leaving, I told her that was sweet to wait for a goodbye kiss, "That's not why, I'm locking you up and taking the key" YES!!!
You can imagine how excited I am, this is a big step for My Love. I've have asked for this many times, if you're not using it please lock it up, so She is. I'm so grateful that She is opening up to this.
She said she also left a list of chores, "You update me on your progress, I'll update you on your rewards"
It's going to be a great weekend!

 

I got home and packed My Loves luggage in the car for Her, we kissed goodbye and She drove away without locking me up, disappointment.
10 minutes later She was back, "Where is my key?" I had thought She forgot but she was just running to get gas!
LOCKED UP FOR THE WEEKEND!!!!
Emergency key is here, but its location is My Loves secret!
My first chore is to do the dishes and put away our laundry.
Happy Happy!