I have been traveling, the kids have been finishing up the school year, stuff has been going on and chastity has taken a firm back seat. I have been really thinking about locking up myself but that breaks my own rule of letting her decide. When I checked my log we only had a week in the past several weeks, it's been infrequent. I go to work, I tend my chores but I feel like a big part of our world is missing. I'm not forsaken but man I miss what became of our relationship. Last night we were getting a little playful before dinner and she firmly says, "No matter what happens tonight, you're getting locked up after." YES! When we get the house quiet and close the bedroom door, I let her know that I was excited to hear she wanted to lock me up again. "We've been doing this for two years, it is a thing now. Am I doing a bad job?" I let her know my preferences and thoughts which she heard and asked more questions. Then she blew my mind. "I like you locked up, it makes you different... better. I mean a little." Now this is a woman who has refused to read any link I shared with her about chastity, she really doesn't like the 'forums' but she just repeated what the books, the forums, the memes, the wifes all say at some point. Wow. She made sure to clarify and make sure my feelings weren't hurt, I was far from hurt. I was blown away. Her objective observation just validated so much of what I have read but always held out as potential fantasy or self-fulfilling prophecy. We had our fun and the cage went on. Life continues.
I understand this completely! I have been in this exact same situation and yesterday mid morning received a text from my wife that I was getting locked back up again tonight... She followed through and stated that I "am a different person when locked and she likes it better"
I've regularly heard things to the effect of "I like how much you're changing, how open you're becoming."
Doug made an interesting point that his wife is not interested in online forms, chat etc. My wife is just the same, both with chastity (relatively recent for us, just a few years) and all our other Domme/sub games we have enjoyed throughout our married life. She just likes the results, in that it turns her on sexually, and in the case of chastity, the different mindset it puts me in, less moody, more respectful.
We had a similar breakthrough in 2014. She realized my behavior changed when locked. It “clicked” in her brain. She told me she preferred my manners in chastity, and said I should be locked up again. It was amazing to hear those words. After years of fooling around she not only accepted but embraced my chastity. It might not have been a circumstance thus I was test-wearing my first custom stainless steel chastity around that time. My wife was skeptical about safety as always, but saw the Contender from MaleChastityNow as more than just a sex toy or a medical device. It must have had an effect on me too. She was actually holding me down on the couch when she had the epiphany. I couldn’t lock up that night. I had just sent the device back to Mark at MaleChastityNow to add the Prince Albert security I had just stretched up into 4g jewelry for. Fortunately he got the device back to us within a week. (That wasn’t the last time he’s turned around modifications promptly, but I was shocked) Soon my wife and I agreed to try for my first 24/7 week in Piercing-secured “real” chastity and it was simply amazing. The effect on my mind with her enthusiasm and the reality of being truly trapped in steel .... you know that Hitchcock dolly-zoom** camera effect?... I felt like that. Anyway, since the moment she said “we should lock you back up” I’ve been under her orgasm control ever since. It reads like a fairy tale but it’s been a dream come true. The reality was slow and patient progress. It took two more years of masturbation denial and orgasm control before she decided to control my chastity or PA jewelry wearing each and every day in 2016 Then just last year I offered her permanent control over my stroking but she refused unless I offered her ownership of all my self-pleasuring. I agreed and she was so proud. Now it’s been over four years since I was pierced for chastity and she’s thanking me for giving her my pleasure. She really enjoys teasing and playing with my mind and body. We’ve become so close. I’m her friend. I’m kind and helpful and ever grateful for her. My submission used to feel like me keeping my head down. Now it’s more like me shining up at her - like a flower basking in the sun. She’s so proud and happy to own me, and that just encourages me further. The chastity is a gift. Her edging and denial is a gift. Anyway. I’ve been gushing (metaphorically) over her lately and I don’t see an end in sight. It can work as a partnership. I just can’t believe how steady our progress has been, ever since that first “you should me kept in chastity” moment. Congratulations to you both! **The Dolly Zoom is meant to represent a "falling-away-from-oneself feeling" or a feeling of unreality, or to suggest that a character is undergoing a realization that causes him or her to reassess everything he or she had previously believed
Sounds very familiar. My wife has zero interest in engaging with the online kink world. But she doesn't need to enjoy our FLR.
That's fantastic! My wife also recently said she thinks I'm "getting better" in chastity--"but far from perfect"!
Years ago ,my wife agreed to tolerate me locking myself in a chstity device. And the miracle happened, she said " I don't want you to remove the cage never ever ,because if that happens ,you will stop beeing nice".... bingo!
When I read your post @Doug Scibor it gave me a good feeling because I can relate to what your saying. My wife isn’t a member here at the mansion. She use to co e here and check on what I was posting but doesn’t even do that much anymore. I’ve connected her with numerous web sights and books to read about Chastity which she has read on her own time. The feeling your talking about that she cares about you to help make you a better person is one of the reasons im still locked after 8 years and don’t want to be unlocked. To serve someone gives me more pleasure than anything else in my life. It was great to read your story I’m looking forward to the continuation. Thanks