Locked 24/7?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by wifey7717, Dec 27, 2018.

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  1. wifey7717
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    wifey7717 New member

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    So my husband and I are new to this world, and we are still figuring out the right cage for him. he has one that seems to fit ok, although a little short. Even with lube, its been chafing him a bit. We tried a new one last night, but it was a bit tight and we'll most likely switch back tomorrow. My sub has mentioned that a lot of people in this lifestyle aren't locked 24/7, so that there can be a break from chafing and whatnot, and a lot of people are no locked for work or for sleep. Since I am new to this, I am curious how true that is, or is he trying to manipulate his way out of his cage? There's no way he wouldn't touch himself if he were out for any length of time.
     
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  2. HeavyFeather
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    HeavyFeather Long term member

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    I’m locked 24/7. I don’t know him. I may get a night off every once in a while. If I get chaffing, I’m usually told ‘too bad’.
     
  3. Doczilla421
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    Doczilla421 Long term member

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    Im locked 24/7, have been for 13 months so far. My wife dosent trust me not to masturbate, and she is correct . Had to get a custom steel cage so It dosent have to come off to clean. She feels it dosent need to be removed because she dosent need it anymore and she dosent want me to use it either.
    I think that a majority of the men locked are locked 24/7. If I have to be locked I think all should have to be locked 24/7 no part time lock ups.
     
  4. Penney
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    Penney Long term member

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    It certainly varies with each relationship. My wife decides when and how long I'll be locked. I'm lucky in that she isn't so strict that I'm locked all the time, but when I'm locked I'm in for a while, and not out at night. A month or so at a time is the longest she has kept me locked up with a break for a week or so.

    Finding a cage that fits correctly is important though if you are going to keep him locked for extended periods. I find that some good lotion a few times a day helps prevent chaffing.
     
  5. tomf_22033
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    tomf_22033 Long term member

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    I've just started to wear my MM Jailbird 24/7.

    I agree getting a custom device helps so much. Some have got off the shelf devices to work but the reality is that it takes adjustment and figuring out what fits well to get to 24/7.

    I HIGHLY recommend that you consider Mature Metal. Contact them and they'll help you figure out the sizing and what you need to do.

    Also, keep in mind that buying a device, putting it on and going for years is nothing but fantasy. In fact going more than a few days or a week right away is extremely rare as the body needs to get used to the device.

    I always suggest that newbies start with a few hours. Then go for 24. Take it off and let the skin have some time to heal from the initial rubbing for a day or two. Then go for two days. Repeat the time off. Go three or four, repeat time off. Then go for a week. After that go for two weeks or a month.

    Once you can go a month then you're into a range that few make.
    Also remember that most get time out to clean, to shave, and to get an erection to ensure that the penis can still function (although cumin or ruined orgasms are typical)

    So start slow and build up. And seriously consider something custom as they're really worth the extra cost and in the case of Mature Metal they're really not that expensive for what you get!

    Now maybe MM will give me a finders fee for all the referrals ;-)
     
  6. Penney
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    Penney Long term member

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    Lots of good advise!! I'd agree that it takes getting used to. Wearing it a little at a time to get used to it worked for me. It also took a while to get used to sleeping in it. Now it feels funny not to have it on.
     
  7. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    Yes, there's some manipulation going on here. He's trying to retain some level of control, trying to hedge his bets. YOU need to make these decisions, not him. And yes, since he's a masturbator, you need to be careful with any release you might decide to give him.

    Many of the men here are locked 24/7, and many are not. It's up to you. But with masturbators like Doczilla -- and like me -- 24/7 is probably the only way to go. It's not just the orgasms you need to get under control, it's the erections and how narcissistic about our erections we masturbators are.

    From my reading here, this is probably the most common situation -- long term 24/7 followed by short-term releases.

    I totally disagree with my friend Tomf about this. The erections won't go away, everything will still function. Just ask him: "are you getting tight in your cage at night? Does the morning wood make you horny and tight in your cage?" If the answer is yes, the mechanics are working just fine.

    As for me, we went 24/7 as soon as we could. She decided when she wanted to use it, and that was usually every two weeks or so. But even when she took him out to use and let him be erect she usually didn't let him spurt -- that pleasure was rare, every two-three months or so. She let him out for a few minutes a week for cleaning and for my weekly long (30-60+ miles) bike ride. Recently, after about two years of this, she's gone to "locked from the minute you get up until the minute you go to bed" and wants to snuggle with the nocturnal erections sometimes.
     
  8. ctrledboy
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    ctrledboy Active member

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    I'd say that most men doing chastity are not locked 24x7. For the vast majority it's probably a occasional game that doesn't last more than a few hours or days. This site is going to have a higher proportion of 24x7 than is normal. To be clear as far as I'm concerned it's not 24x7 if you can't at least wear continuously for a week.

    I used to think that longer than a few days was impossible. But over the past year I've had 2 periods that were over 2 months. The longest of which was 82 days. That's continuous wear without removal for any reason whatsoever. So it is possible, but it's not easy.

    As others have told you getting to that point is not easy at all. It will take time. We started with a Holy Trainer that we'd remove every day for cleaning. Got a Prince Albert Piercing for security. Moved to a Steelheart with a PA fixation. At first we were removing that daily for cleaning, but over time the periods of not removing it increased. Until we got to the point where it was clear the only reason it needed to come off was that my wife wanted it off for some reason.

    One thing that I've learned along the way is that a good daily lube is critical to getting there. You don't mention what lube you're using. But I've found that using a silicone lubricant works for me (specifically System JO Premium Classic Lubricant). Other folks have different preferences. I've seen people suggest petroleum jelly, baby oil, various skin cremes. You may have to experiment to find what lubricant works best for him.

    Beyond that it comes down to device fit. You'd have to be very lucky to use an off the shelf device and be able to get up to 24x7. For ball trap devices there are 3 sizing factors that are important.

    Ring size. This is the size of the ring that goes around the balls and the penis. The general rule of thumb is that this should be tight enough that you can get a finger through up to the first knuckle. When starting out I'd suggest you get multiple rings (even on a custom device). This is the mostly likely place you are to have problems with fit. If you go too small you'll have issues. If you go too big it won't stay on. Note that over time you'll be able to go smaller.

    Tube diameter. This is the size of the interior of the tube. You want the tube to be as close to his flaccid size as possible. Smaller is generally better. So if in doubt go with a smaller size. Especially if he's a grower.

    Tube length. This is the length of the interior of the tube. Some manufacturers include the overall length of the device including ring and the spacing between the ring and the tube. So take note of how the manufacturer is measuring this. This you can pretty much go as short as you want. I'd suggest starting with roughly the flaccid length of his penis. Overtime you can decrease this just line the ring size if desired.

    So with all that said, do I think he's trying to manipulate you? Maybe. It's hard to really say since it's hard to say how much exposure he has to people who really do wear long term. But based on how new you say you are, I don't think straight up going 24x7 is likely to work. I'd suggest you take your time as others have suggested and work up to longer periods. I realize that given your situation that may be disappointing since you're also using chastity to rekindle things. But give it time and you'll have better results.

    I say that because across my 20 years of off and on doing chastity. I've had many failures where my partner and I have just given up and quit doing chastity for a while. Largely because we tried to rush things.
     
  9. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Long term member

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    It took us years to get to where I am now, and even that is "mostly" 24/7. We finally found a cage I can sleep in, but it's not one I can pee in, so the cap has to come off for me to pee. It comes off for cleaning/shaving, and it comes off for doctors/sports/motorcycle. I wear a symbolic stainless ring behind the glans when I'm un-caged. I've had sporadic reactions to the metal in my cage now and then, and had to un-lock.

    A big thing with us though, is we spent years training me out of wanting masturbation, orgasm, selfish pleasures, and being un-locked. In the early years, chastity was short term, and led to infrequent, but mind blowing orgasms. 12 years later and I don't like being un-locked, and would not masturbate or penetrate if I had the chance. It's not as 24/7 as many here manage, but at the same time, mentally, I am fully chaste and denied, regardless. This did not happen overnight by any stretch. It takes a good long time for a chastity cage to go from being a hot sex toy, to a hot state of being, to eventually become ritual and routine.

    Finding the right cage or cages is key. For a long time, I had a cage that was great around the house and work, but a different one for wearing under jeans, and a different one again for when my wife and I would have sex. Patience and practice!
     
  10. Sexy Slave 69
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    Sexy Slave 69 Long term member

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    Im locked 247 now and are only unlocked when my lady wants to use or tease her property.
    And i love it.
     
  11. cshorts
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    cshorts Locked in love for SL

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    It does seem that there are as many variations on lock-up as their are men pursuing chastity :). On a forum like this you have a self-selection of more serious folks, so more will be 24/7.

    I've been 24/7 pretty much from day 1. I was very fortunate that the HolyTrainer I started with is a very good fit. I have some chafing problems now and then, especially after a night with especially frequent nocturnal erections, or after being very teased without O. But lube or lotion minimizes the discomfort, and the chafing also seems less frequent and less intent the longer I go (about 3 months now).

    My KH lets me out weekly for cleaning, shaving and play (usually PIV, not always with an O for me tho). This past Sunday she thought my skin looked a bit prunish so she made me stay unlocked for about 6 hours to give it air. But other than those short hygiene and play breaks, it's 24x7.

    The two main factors I've noticed in forum discussions are strength of desire to submit to orgasm control, and physical comfort / fit issues with the device.
     
  12. Ma’ams Slut
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    Ma’ams Slut Long term member

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    I agreee with this in my experience. I also have a mm jailbird and wear it 24/7 and only comes off if she uses me and back in it goes. The custom fit ones when fit properly fit you well he won’t even know it’s on unless he gets or attempts to get an erection or at night while sleeping .
     
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  13. Intensity
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    Intensity Lovely Hot Wife Holds The Key

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    Locked most of the time here, you could say 24/7. When I am allowed to cum, I usually am allowed to stay out for a day then locked back up. I cannot be trusted to not touch myself and she knows that.

    She can also be gratuitous by allowing me extended time out. Was out for a few days during the holidays. This is usually only times when we are with each other so she can keep an eye on me.
     
  14. Naljeans
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    Naljeans Active member

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    People all do what works for their situation, however the effects are much different between continuous and intermittent lock up. Denial of all erections for a week or more is pretty different from orgasm control.

    For reference, I’m in 24/7. Released every two to three weeks to play. Cage typically goes back on within a minute. Reinforces the relationship.
     
  15. jim48
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    jim48 Long term member

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    I also have a MM Jailbird custom device. No reason for this device to ever come off if that is what you want. Have worn for six months with no release and no chaffing or soreness of any kind. It pays to make the jump to a custom cage without wasting money on the cheap models that may or may not fit correctly. Good luck with your decision.
     
  16. Nicoftime
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    Nicoftime The suspense is terrible...I hope it lasts

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    Well it’s impossible to tell without knowing how his cage fits, what kind of cage, or his dimensions and irritation issues. A cage that doesn’t fit is awful for long term wear, and every second wearing a cage that isn’t right is torture. Once the cage fits, it really only needs to come off for periodic inspection of the privates (to make sure no abrasions or lesions), and to groom as needed. The more you experience with the cage and history of no issues, the less you need to inspect.

    Good luck.
     
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  17. LockedPom
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    LockedPom Long term member

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    I would expect that the minority of men with chastity devices are locked 24/7. The majority probably just use it occasionally or during sessions, or tried it and gave up, with the device now in a drawer somewhere. This forum will obviously have more 24/7 and serious types.
     
  18. CivilServant
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    Welcome aboard! Not only to the forum but to your new lifestyle!

    The chaffing indeed can be an issue, especially at first when you have new things rubbing in places that usually aren't rubbed like that. It can take some getting used to. And then there's the issue of finding the right fit. Even with a good fit, there's always the issue of security. And all of that is assuming that it's a good quality and correctly sized cage.

    It took me some time to acclimate to the new device. The most painful for me is always sitting; you've got pulls and squeezes and oh my, I'll just stand for a while, thank you.

    After giving myself a few months to get used to it, I dropped the bomb and gave the key to my fiance as a Valentine's Day present in 2008, to be used on our wedding day. At that point in time, though, our wedding date had not yet been set....

    There is definitely a period of adjustment with something like this. I would allow him free access to the key and cage, to put it on and take it off as much as he'd like, for about 2-3 months. After that, you both will know how well it fits, how secure it is, and whether you might benefit from a different model.

    Once that point has been reached, the key is no longer his. But up until that point, he needs to have access to it so that he can get used to it and find a way that's comfortable. Ultimately, you want him to feel "safe" in his cage; it's not meant to be a punishment or something to feel ashamed or resentful towards (well, at least in my humble opinion, anyways). It should become "a part of him" so to speak. Ask any 24/7 wearers how naked they feel without their caged. Again, you want him to feel safe in his cage).

    I think one of the most important distinctions that you will both need to be 100% clear about are your intentions. If this meant to be a lifestyle change? Or just a glorified T&D session? Is he doing this to stop masturbating? Or to allow you to consume all of his sexual thoughts and desires? Really, those two questions will really provide a clear path for the future as I'm sure the both of you probably don't know how to answer those questions. Hell, I sure didn't when I started but now, I can say with 150,000% certainty that it's all for her.

    Good luck! This is new territory you're walking into, and it's easier to learn when you're both walking together, rather than when one is pulling the other, kicking and screaming.

    (don't get me wrong, kicking and screaming has its place, as does biting, scratching, hair pulling, et cetera... )
     
  19. Maid Denise
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    Maid Denise Maid for my Goddess

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    I have been locked24/7
     
  20. Maid Denise
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    Maid Denise Maid for my Goddess

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    For 10 months now. Finding the right cage for him is very important. I am only let out for her pleasure. I will say with the right cage you forget you have it on. I now feel nude if i dont have it on. But your the Key Holder and it should be up to yoy when it is on or off.
    Have a great journey
     
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  21. Chaste J.
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    Chaste J. Long term member

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    It's just the natural thing now!
     
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  22. Mr. Toots
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    Mr. Toots Member

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    We played on and off for a few years using cheap devices. Last year we finally tried the Holy Trainer v3 and I've pretty much worn it 24/7 with little to no issues. She only let's me out for fun, specific things and a few times here and there because of some discomfort. I used to fight having to wear it pretty regularly, but after getting the right device for me and getting over myself about, it honestly feels weird going without now. I found that once I gave more into it, it was really a game changer in our relationship.
     
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  23. Dave Leonard
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    Dave Leonard Active member

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    Locked 24/7 here for the past 3 yrs, yes i do get release every 3 months but the cage goes right back on after that, Get a good cage if you plan on longterm. i wear a mature metal jailbird
     
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  24. Deleted member 11770
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    This year, I have been locked by my keyholder about 1/3 of the time. When locked, it is 24/7, and the lockup lengths this year have gone from 3 days to 36 days. I have a custom Lori device but I still suffer chafing and excess pressure, and this is often the reason for my lockup periods to end. To minimize the need for humanitarian unlocking, use silicone lube generously. And another trick I learned that works very well is to put a bandaid between the skin and ring where you are getting chafing.
     
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  25. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Locked today, tomorrow, forever

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    Well @wifey7717 what can I say. You asked for advice and you get a lot of it. Isn’t it great how everyone is trying to help get people locked up, what a wild and crazy place this is.

    I’m one of the few 24X7 people that only gets my cage removed when My Lovely Wife Wants it removed and that’s not very often. Finding your perfect fitting cage is very important as others have already said. It also takes some time to get use to being locked during the night. Those damn nocturnal erections.

    When we started with Chastity it was 50% of the time and I thought that was to much. Times do change.

    One thing I would like to say is Chastity doesn’t start until He is begging and complaining that he wants it removed. If it’s not showing signs of physical injury than it’s your call when it should be removed. Good Luck.
     
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