Is chastity meant to prevent male orgasms

What is an orgasm ?

 

I am curious about your minimum. Does it take six weeks of forbearance for the male to understand (1) his lack of control over releases; (2) the full aspect of power exchange in the relationship; (3) a true test-time of chastity that's serious period of denial -- as opposed to waiting.

 

Chastity is a game. It does nothing to stop (male) orgasms. It is nothing but an object that stands in the way of direct access, a temporary obstacle at best. A chastised person is only prevented from self pleasuring if the chastity is mental. No device that I know of controls the brain. It is quite amusing how so many think the fantastical nature of chastity actually changes anything. One does not change because of a device they almost certainly asked for. There may be a few here in CM who actually have been put into chastity against their will, or perhaps it was suggested that they comply with wearing a device or some kind of consequence would ensue. But if all are truly honest, dick worship is at the center of 99% of all chastity relationships. The guise of control offered by any locking device, even the most secure and inescapable, can ultimately be taken off with the simple utilization of common tools readily found in most households world wide. The one wearing the device has made a decision to do so, no matter what any key holder thinks in terms of control, the control is all with the wearer. Acting submissive and allowing oneself to be caged and thereby rendered sexually useless is a choice always. Perhaps you can be tricked into thinking there is no escape, but the reality is chastity is but one facet of sexual play, and is merely a speed bump on the highway of sexual interaction. It serves no purpose to train or bend anyone to the will of a keeper. It is an amusement, and very commonly a masochistic fetish play that is self imposed. It is okay to want to feel pain. In this world of exponential technology, social media, faux privacy, there is a very harsh reality that none of us really have any say or control over anything. Pain is a tangible, readily available, and easy solution to a world that is stripping humanity of its connection to nature, to true feelings of connectivity and emotion. Self imposing that pain is relatively harmless. There are no injured bystanders, no fatalities resulting from such self imposed violence. But at the root there is violence. Violence is all around us, constantly. It insipidly works its way into our lives and camouflages to the background so we begin to accept it as normal. But it is what is our undoing. A little sip of poison over time may build an immunity, but at what cost?
It took me some time to admit all of this to myself. I wanted so badly to hand actual control over to my wife and to be dominated past submission to the point of helpless servitude. She liked the idea too. Wanting does not equate anything. As long as sexual organs are in tact, most thinking is done with them in mind, particularly for males. Castration is the only way to cause a change that cannot be undone. This has been proven through the ages in a number of cultures. Nature and instincts are far too powerful for petty little devices to actually do anything other than enhance sexual play. Even with the addition of strictly enforced bondage as consequence for non compliance, where one might feel broken and helpless enough to accept thinking that they are no longer in control, they still have a choice. It is all a game. It is all in your head. Chastity wearers and their key holders are all too often none the wiser, playing their little game as if it is reality.
Violence is part of reality. For humans, it is a choice.

 

@Mistress B - I assume this comment is with consideration to the high rates of obesity found specifically in 'North America' (land of the Trump) given @gyrators analogy to a locked fridge? Well, if not, it still yanked a hearty laugh out of me! Ha Ha Ha stupid Amerikkkans!

 

I think the OP's comment in this thread:-
https://www.chastitymansion.com/for...ally-all-about-humiliation.20762/#post-188799
Speaks volumes about the issues that surround CM. The fact that he feels “special” in a way that seems to imply unwelcome is to say the least of it unfortunate. Threads such as:-
https://www.chastitymansion.com/for...ial-the-right-message-to-be-giving-out.20504/

and this one are, I believe, unhelpful by stopping this becoming a more inclusive place. Some self-control to moderate some of the intemperate language used such as:-

“Sleeping next to someone with a locked cock that smells like a gents toilet? Fuuuuuuck that. ” (Mistress Lucy)

and your:-
“ males spewing semen, (one can almost smell it), it is more like a Roman orgy or a Turkish brothel ”

would help.

My suspicion is that the reason CM has so many “lurkers” is that they drop in to see if there is anything of interest to their level of kink, view some of the more extreme stuff, and do a bunk before their partner sees it and decides a divorce lawyer is needed.

 

Chastity for us is a functional tool that allows my wife to enjoy sex. We never had any kind of kink or fetish. We're still very vanilla.

Our journey into chastity began with me trying to stop masturbating. I had no plans for it beyond being something to help me stop masturbating.

A little background, my wife has always found penetration painful. Prior to chastity she really hated sex. Loathed it. She would often cry during and/or after sex. After so many years of painful sex, she would get anxious and afraid if she even knew I had an erection. I had actually tried making love to her without penetration, but with me having an erection she just couldn't enjoy it because the anxiety was still there because the potential for penetration was there.

After a few weeks of me wearing my device, I really wanted sex one night. My wife said she was menstruating, and maybe I should just stay locked and we could do "everything else". We did all the usual foreplay stuff and as I was playing with her clit she had her first orgasm ever. Later on we discussed it and she confided that she had never felt safer, more loved, and more free to enjoy sex and that's why she was able to experience an orgasm.

We experimented for a while with varying lengths of chastity for me, because she wanted me to have pleasure, too. But every time I was let out, out sex life was a wreck. She would cry, get nervous, the same old things, but actually a little worse because she knew what she was missing now.

After a lot of ups and downs, trial and error, we decided that my chastity would be indefinite. At first she wanted permanent chastity, and it may well turn out to be that, but we decided to leave the duration open in case in the future she changes her mind. Maybe she'll want to have another kid or something.

Our situation is not typical of most people on here, but I wanted to share it because I want others to know that chastity isn't always some BDSM kink fetish thing or a dominant/submissive thing. There are many reasons couples enjoy it. My wife enjoys it because it's the only way she can actually enjoy sex. I enjoy it because I love seeing my wife happy and enjoying sincere affection from her.

 

To be fair, the comment that has been attributed to Mistress Lucy was her way of counteracting a fairly impolite comment that had been made to her. I can't find it right now (it's somewhere in those 18 pages of mostly abuse she received) and can't remember who said it, not that it matters, but it wasn't very nice. She had every right to respond like that. It would have been more appropriate to quote the original comment.

 

Yes ma'am, agree 100% with your viewpoint, there's a huge difference between chastity play/fantasy and real chastity/FLR.

 

Please indulge me - what's the exact ifference between 'chastity play/fantasy' and 'real chastity/FLR' ?

 

Shimone, as I see it, chastity is a useful and practical part of a committed long-term FLR. It heightens both partners' feelings towards each other within the context of that power-exchange relationship.

Chastity play/fantasy is yet another terrific reason to be alive and may (probably) be an important aspect of a FLR but is not necessarily part of one. It can exist independently.

 

I just meant that there are some who see it as a game or foreplay, whereas it is a very serious matter for others. Neither viewpoint is wrong, just noting the difference. What @Mistress B appears to be an advocate of is seriously enforced male chastity as a means of achieving the absolute full potential of a FLR and I just happen to agree with the effectiveness she noted.

 

Good attitude, but if I understand you correctly you are still making an error: Going short term does NOT (necessarily) mean that you take chastity in itself lightly (not serious).

 

Looks to me like you've already answered your own question?

But of course I won't stop without telling my own point of view:
First of all: there's no such thing as "absloute prevention" - mankind can't prevent pollution (one can almost smell it ), pregnancy, diseases or whatever, so chastity as well is only a tool to at least keep things managable.
I think that's one of the reasons I like Madame claiming to be my "orgasm-manager"!

Second: chastity might also be able to prevent female orgasms!

And third: the obviously most wanted effect of chastity - as you described it - as a method to adjust attitudes or such, still bases on the importance of orgasms, which get more valuable each day they are denied. So it shouldn't be that much surprising, that "releases" are getting more important as well!
Of course it fills my heart with envy to read too much about releases here as well (not to mention the smell once more ), but I think it's "part of the game"...

 

I find it odd how much even our own opinions and desires change once we start down a different path.

When I started, I wanted to give up control... that's it. I also thought if this didn't sit well for me I would take off the device and resume normal activity.

Now, besides some extra kinks discovered by both parties, we have evolved our expectations. I wouldn't/couldn't stop wearing the device now, even if things got rocky. Having an orgasm without her would feel like cheating on her at this point. I don't think masterbation is wrong, but knowing how much of a better partner I am without it and doing it anyway, would be showing her very little respect and that I don't care. That being said, I would feel the same way about her...if she got herself off all the time, ignored me, and was a shitty partner because of it, I would feel that she was taking me for granted and be upset if she continued.

I like to call chastity a dynamic, because it changes and evolves, just like our wants and needs.

 

Since one reason I use it on bf isto control his masturbation and pornography viewing, I guess it is to prevent orgasms. He's not going to look at pornography if he can't get a cheap thrill from it. I check his computer history all the time. When he's locked up, there's no pornography on it. When I first started to lock him up, he tried looking at pornography, but he admitted it was only frustrating so he doesn't bother anymore if he's in chastity.

 

we use a device because i cant keep my hands off and we really try to give me an orgasm a month so far we have heard more time but havent made it yet we can see a change in attentiveness by all means and really look foward to more time

 

Yes, Mistress keeps me in chastity mainly to restrict my ability to have an orgasm.

It is one of Her favorite parts about male submission, and i enjoy it very much also. It keeps me horny all the time, and helps to increase my level of obedience and the level of humiliation i am willing to endure.

She uses it mainly as a tool to prevent masturbation, and heavily reduce the number of times i will release each month.

 

I think Vinny say gold the words:
"I can escape at any time or end it by uttering my safe word but I do not want to escape or give myself an orgasm by holding a vibrator against my cage. I would only be cheating myself."

 

Any teasing should be at YOUR sole discretion. Do it often enough that you do not neglect the sexual component, but NEVER do it on his orders unless this is how you both have agreed that this is how it goes. In my FLR, I call all the shots sexually, PERIOD! His is allowed to get on his knees and politely beg for something sexual, but what goes down is my call always. I feel that him getting on his knees adds a sweetly submissive touch to his requests.

 

Not discounting anything you have said and can only speak personally
My wife and i enjoy an active sex life that involves penetrative sex. She nor I would not want to have permanent chastity for that reason (not to mention the yeast and bacterial buildup). With that said after a few days and sometimes a couple of weeks of T&D i have intense orgasms. On her end, in addition to the power trip she enjoys the extra attention i give her and bringing me the intense orgasms. Finally, like most marriages, not all partners have the same libido. When she has no interest it becomes extended chastity instead of rejection.

Fyi we cruise every year and SHE is trying to figure out on she can bring the cage