A Female Led Community

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by Tjeik, Aug 1, 2021.

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  1. Tjeik
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    Tjeik Member

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    As I have told in my introduction at another place in this Forum, I grew up in a female led Community in Denmark, which a group of leftist and feminist young women founded in the year 1970, where my dear little sister Ida was 5 year old, and I was 8 year old.

    I think it may be of some interest for the readers to learn about how I as a boy grew up in a Female Led Community, where all the women and girls were strong believers in the natural superiority of females. And that to such a degree, that our mothers literally tried to create a kind of matriarchal society, which might seem odd today, but not in Denmark in the 1970s, where many young peoples wanted to change the society and were experimenting with new types of family structures, new forms of spirituality, new definitions of gender roles and so on.
    Especially I think it might be interesting, because unlike most people who live in a Female Led Relationship, as I do with my beloved wife Larissa, I was brought up in a Female Led Community.
    Almost all of the girls and boys who grew up in our small community still live in Female Led Relationships, and I think that this is interesting, because of cause all we boys were not "naturally born submissive" (or how you will say it in English). I think that this fact proves that Female led Relationships works, and can endure for generations.

    Before I tell more, I would like to emphasize, that I had a very good childhood, and I certainly don't write this in order to complain about anything.
    For centuries girls and boys have been brought up to believe, that boys somehow should be better or more worth than girls (and so it unfortunately still is in most parts of the world). I am glad, that I was taught to respect girls and women, and even if we were told that the girls were mentally and intellectually superior to us boys, our mothers loved us boys every bit as much as they loved their daughters.

    For better understanding I have to tell something about those times in Denmark:

    Back in the 1970s there were quite a lot of far left organizations in Denmark, all belonging to what was then termed "The New Left".

    My mother belonged to THE RED STOCKING MOVEMENT (DENMARK), which was a radical feminist movement of mostly well educated young women, split in several fractions.
    As the years passed by, and the expected socialist revolution did not take place, some of the feminist, including my mother and the other women in our small community, absorbed themselves in the ideas of the existence of prehistorical Matriarchies and Goddess worship, which in those years were very popular among radical feminist, because these theories seemed to confirm their notions of female superiority and proved that women unjustly had been deprived of their age old traditional leading role in religion and society when the patriarchy was established. And when the surrounding society did not change in the way they wanted, many leftist tried to create their own mini societies in collectives, or in communities like THYLEJREN or the FREETOWN CHRISTIANIA. (Words written in capital letters can be found in the English Wikipedia).

    My mother and her female friends all had a higher education - many of them, including my mother, were academics - but their highest wish was to create a female orientated, egalitarian society.

    In the year 1970, when my sister Ida was 5 year old, and I was 8 year old (in that same year Thylejren was founded) they therefore created their own community, in which, as I think that I have described in my introduction post, all property were owned by the women in common.
    Originally there were about 12-15 women; but later on many more women moved in with their children and male lovers. We really were a lot of children, because not only had most of the women had intercourse with many lovers and therefore children with them, but it was also seen as something great among them to have many children. Motherhood was considered as something almost sacred, because the ability to create new life most clearly distinguished the women as the superior sex.
    My mother had only Ida and me, but most women had three or four children. One mother had five children, and the woman in our community with most children had seven girls and boys, which was quite unusual in Denmark at that time.
    So there were plenty of children in our community, even if it was small.

    Newly arrived women in our community were required to pay a certain amount of money, but then they also owned the fields, gardens, orchards and houses on equal terms with the other women.
    The egalitarian principles were so important to the founders of our small community, that they could not step back on it.
    That the men were excluded from ownership, did not seem to bother those strong minded women: After all, this was a female founded and female led community, and their men and lovers were free to leave, when ever they wanted to. In this regard there was no compulsory exercised by the women over their men whatsoever. And without having part in the ownership of the property, the men had considerably less responsibility than the women, and even than their teenage daughters, who were seen as the heiresses. This gave, I thought back then, the men a more carefree life. And as I said: If they did not want to be there, the men were always free to leave. And if the women got tiered of their lovers, they just told them to leave.



    Both girls and us boys in our community felt our way of life as quite normal and natural, and we boys also accepted the idea of the girls being superior to us as an undeniable truth, even if it was a bit humiliating for us, because that was what our mothers and sisters had told us. But at the same time we of cause were well aware, that our way of life was not the way of life of most of the people in our country. I think you could compare our situation to what children of small religious sects, e.g. Jehovas Witnesses, are experiencing.

    In the nearby village, where all we children went to school, the inhabitants in our community were called "de skøre" (in English: The lunatics).
    At first the village people shunned all contact with us, and their children were even forbidden to play with us. So it was for several years, but at the time that I was 13-14 years old, the attitude of the villagers had markedly changed: Although we in their opinion still were kind of weird, the people in the village had noticed, that we always worked very hard, and hard working people was something these village people really respected. We also were very frugal (as opponents of the capitalist consumer society, frugality was an ideal for our mothers), and this also won us the respect of the villagers. And we were honest, because our mothers hated children who told lies. This also was noticed and appreciated by the villagers, adults and children alike.
    Another important thing was, that the villagers noticed, that we boys always were well behaved towards the girls in the village (this came natural to us, as we from early on had been taught to respect girls of all ages), and we never provoked the village boys into fights and so on.
    Therefore the children from the village at long last were allowed to visit us, which they then did all the year around, not only in the summer time, where the village girls clearly enjoyed seeing a lot of almost naked boys. Close friendships between many of us and them were made, and if the boys of the village had quarrels with boys from other villages in the neighbourhood, they could always count on us to come and help them, because we had a reputation of being really strong, a side effect of our hard work.


    Because I grew up in a Female Led Community I from time to time have read about Female Led Family life on various Internet forums, driven by curiosity. But I soon found out, that many of the descriptions in some of these forums of Female Superiority and Female Led Families don't match my own experiences, to put it mildly.

    I have often read stories of wifes, who spank their men and sons on the slightest occasion. Or stories of moms and sisters, who on a weekly or even daily basis kick their sons or brothers in the testicles, and treat them in the most humiliating ways, bordering on torture. Of course much of all this may be imagination or exaggeration, but even if it is, it is not good, because women and girls do NOT deserve to be described as evil or wicked persons, who in some cases (if true) are almost monsters.

    At least it is not my experience, that girls and women with power turn into bad human beings. And to stress this fact is my reason to write about my upbringing in a Female Led Community.

    Our mother, my dear little sister Ida and I all slept in the same room (our house was not a big house): Ida and I slept in an old, large double bed, while mother slept in a single bed which stood opposite to our bed. I always slept naked, while Ida and mom wore their night gown. As I grew older and became a teenager, my mother more often than before taught Ida and me about the fact of female superiority, always ending with emphasizing, that although Ida was three years younger than me, she all the same was vastly superior to me.
    Well, although I accepted what our mom told us, the suggestion that my little sister should be not only superior, but vastly superior to me, always embarrassed me, and made me blush. I often tried to argue, that considering the age difference between us, Ida and me were equals. But our mom just smiled, and said, that "there is no such thing as equality between sisters and brothers". ("Der er aldrig lighed mellem søstre og brødre", as she said in Danish).
    So it was for a while, until on day in the summer holidays, when I was 14, and Ida was 11 years old.

    A group of German feminist were then visiting us, and they were not only feminist, but also, as it turned out, strong believers in the existence of ancient and contemporary Matriarchies, and ardent supporters of Goddess worship. In fact the visit of these German women started what I would call the Matriarchal and Goddess Worship fascination among the women of our community.

    One early evening during this summer our mother came back home in a quite elated mood from a Women Meeting, where the German women had told their Danish friends, how easy it was to demonstrate and prove, that any girl is superior to any boy. Our mom then ordered Ida and me to stand up, and face each other. This we did, and now mom said, that we should look each other straight into the eyes. To lower one's eyes would be a clear sign of recognition of the other person's superiority. And mom added, that she was very sure that I would have to lower my eyes before Ida, thereby recognizing her as vastly superior to me. As mother had said, it turned out: As much as I tried not to, in the end I could not stand up to Ida starring me right into my eyes, and I looked down, admitting her superiority, as mother triumphantly said. I thought it might just be a coincident, and at my insist we tried the look in the eyes contest again and again and again and again, but Ida won every time. My growing humiliation was causing my penis to grow considerably in my briefs, and a bulge was hastily forming. Ida giggled, and asked mom why my dick was getting stiff ("pik" is the danish slang word which Ida used), and mom replied that this was a sign from my body beyond my control, whereby I in fact admitted, that Ida was superior to me. I then gave up, admitted defeat, and felt utterly humiliated.

    Now the whole point of my experience, and the reason why I am telling it here, is Ida's reaction, because it tells me something of girls, that do not correspond with most of what is written of girls in many of the forums dealing with the theme Female Superiority which I have read:

    That night I felt very embarrassed as I lay together with my little sister, whom I always had loved, in our big double bed. My feeling of humiliation caused me to have a throbbing involuntary erection, which I only occasionally had in the mornings (which mother said was completely normal), and although we lay covered under a big blanket, Ida of course could not help noticing my erection, and she also guessed the cause. But she didn't tease me. Quite the contrary: She hugged me, and told me not to mind that she was superior to me, because I was still much stronger than her. Much stronger, as she emphasized. Her loving reaction made me realize, not only that Ida really WAS superior to me, but also and foremost, that this was nothing for me to be ashamed about. Next morning I told mom, that I didn't mind being inferior to Ida, because she would always be my dear little sister. Then mom hugged us both, and nothing more was spoken of this matter.

    As to how boys and girls in our female led community were punished, I first have to say, that we boys were never spanked. Never ever. To spank a child was considered reactionary by all the women.
    Girls who misbehaved was reprimanded with stern words, and we boys were likewise scolded, but the scolding of a boy was always followed up with one or two slaps to his face. And it really hurt, when I was receiving a face slapping from my mother. If my sister was present when mom was punishing me, and it was in the summer time, where I only wore my briefs, as a teenage boy my embarrassment often caused me an involuntary erection, which always made my sister giggle, although she tried not to. My mother would then pull my briefs down, and squeeze my testicles, which was very painful. My penis instantly went soft, and then I could pull my briefs up again. I never had corner time (we didn't know the concept), and when my punishment was over, it WAS over.
    Like all girls, my sister was never hit when she was scolded, but I think this double standard was fair, because my sister was always very sad long after mom had reprimanded her, although I always tried to cheer her up the best I could. Her punishment obvious had a much deeper effect on her, than the harsher punishment I was receiving had on me.
    I thought back then, that this difference had something to do with the superiority of the girls. They felt everything on a much deeper level as did we boys.

    I have to point to something of great importance, and that is what my mother and the other women meant when they said, that girls like my sister Ida were vastly superior to boys. As Ida was so nice to point out for me in her effort to comfort me, I of course was stronger than her, but even young girls in their teen or even preteen years were considered more mature than boys, and therefore mentally and intellectually superior. That was what these feminist women meant when they said, that girls were vastly superior to boys.

    You do not need to be a feminist to agree with that, I believe.

    But my mother and her female friends also believed, that a girl always should be morally superior to a boy, which meant, that a truly superior girl never ought to use her mental and intellectual superiority to harm or humiliate a boy. Exactly as we boys were strictly forbidden to hit a girl, or in any way use our greater strength to harm them in any way.

    As our mother always said, with superiority follows responsibility.
     
  2. homebody
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    homebody In awe of GoddesofHomebody

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    This is a fascinating story. Thank you for sharing.
     
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  3. Kat9s toy
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    Kat9s toy Active member

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    Very interesting & informative. I really enjoyed reading this account of how you were brought up. Very thought-provoking.
     
  4. Tjeik
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    Thank you for your kind words, homebody.
    If you find my story of my life in a Female Led Community fascinating, then I can say that I have a lot more to tell.

    So I will go on with my story, since some of you want to read it.
    I know that my posts are rather long, and for that I apologize.
    But nobody is forced to read those long post, and the space on the Internet seems to be endless...


    The first four or five years after our mothers had established our small community, the inhabitants in the nearby village forbade their children to visit us, because our feminist and leftist mothers were considered to be "crazy people". But as I have told in a previous post, gradually the people in the village found out that we were hard working and well behaved girls and boys, and then they allowed their children to visit us, and be friends with us.
    Among the village boys is was common to have some kind of leisure job, especially during the long summer holidays, in order to earn some money. Many of them had such a job, and therefore they did not help us with our work, and we didn't expect them to either.

    We on our part always helped the boys from our neighboring village if they had quarrels and fights with boys from other villages, and we really liked to do it. Although we normally were well behaved, when I look back I think that we boys could be quite violent, if we were provoked, or if our friends were provoked. or even worse: If someone tried to provoke, or did not respect, our girls. Then there would surely flow blood. The blood of the disrespectful. And perhaps also our own blood, but we didn't care about our own pain.

    I think that the explanation for this violent tendency among us - although it only showed up if we or someone we cared for were provoked or attacked - should be sought in our Female Led upbringing, strange as it may sound.
    Therefore I have to tell a bit more about this.

    As I have told, the women who had founded our community owned everything in common. They were strong believers in collectivism and women solidarity, and that meant, that if one of the mothers had financial troubles, the other women always would lent her money. Or they simply gave her money, or helped her in other ways.
    As leftist feminist, who gradually came to believe in Goddess inspired spirituality, our mothers considered motherhood to be something almost holy, and they didn't approve of abortion. (This was a very uncommon attitude on the left wing in Denmark back in the 1970s).

    Although most of our mothers were well educated, and many were academics, their high evaluation of motherhood meant, that they did not want to have a full-time job as long as their children were in their preteen years. If they had a lover, or even better a permanent male partner, he of cause would have a paid job outside our community, but we all lived a very frugal life, trying to be as self sufficient as we could.
    (As I have told in my previous post, our moms and sisters for instance made much of our clothes, especially the girls clothes, in what was called hønsestrik. Later on they even sold their beautiful hønsestrik clothes to the people in the surrounding villages, in order to earn some money).

    But when the eldest daughter of a household came of age - that meant when she was a young teenage girl of 13 or 14 years - her mother would try to find a full-time job (which often was quite easy back then), leaving her teenage daughter to be her substitute when she herself and her male partner were at work, with the right and duty to delegate the day's work to her sisters and brothers, and with full authority to even punish her brothers if need be.
    This our moms did, because they rightly thought, that girls are more mature than boys, and therefore they were vastly superior to us, as we were always told. And because the girls spent their working time at home together with our moms, they exactly knew how our moms used to delegate the different tasks to the sisters and brothers in a fair way. And as the girls were the heiresses, assuming responsibility when acting as their mothers substitutes was a kind of training them for their future life. So our mothers thought.
    In order to tell how this worked in practice, I will use my own little family as an example:

    When my dear little sister Ida turned 13, and thus became a young teenage girl - I was 16 years old at the time - we had a great birthday party for her in our house where a lot of girls and boys from our community and from the nearby village were present.
    Ida was born on the 2. of June, so it was a nice and warm summer day. We played white settlers and Indians, and I remember that we boys - the Indians - won the war game on that day.
    But after the children had left us in the early evening hours, our mom summoned Ida and me in the living room, and told us, that she had got a full-time job at the University in Copenhagen, and that she would start working there after the summer holidays. From time to time our mother had had past-time jobs, but most of the time she had stayed at home with us children.
    But now, mom said, Ida was old enough to assume responsibility and take over the leading role in our house due to her new status as a teenage girl and act as mom's substitute when she was away from home. From now on I would have to obey Ida as I had obeyed herself, mom said, and Ida was authorized to punish me in the same way as mom used to do, if necessary.
    I didn't like to hear that. I blushed, and in my feeling of embarrassment I could even fell that an erection was starting to form in my briefs.
    But then I noticed how proud and happy Ida looked, and that made me feel happy for her. I actually hogged her and congratulated her, and this sign of accept from my part was the right thing to do, because my sense of embarrassment almost disappeared.

    As you might have guessed, Ida never misused her power. She worked every bit as hard as me, and she very rarely punished me with a slap to my face. When she did, her face slapping really hurt, but she only did it on rare occasions, where I certainly deserved it. (As a teenage boy, I sometimes could be quite lazy, I must admit).
    That my sister Ida was in charge when mother was away from home also meant, that Ida had the full responsibility for everything that happened.
    If mom came home, and something was not done to her satisfaction, it was always Ida, never me, who was reprimanded by our mother. Even if I also somehow was to blame, it was always Ida whom mom hold responsible, because she had been given the female authority.
    It often made life easier for me than for Ida, I think. But it of cause also strengthened in me the feeling of inferiority towards Ida and all other girls.

    I am pretty sure, that the Female Led conditions of our daily life was the reason, why we boys could be really violent if we were in a fight, especially if some of our girls were present.
    Because then we had a chance to show our courage and strength to the girls, and earn their admiration. Here we, not the girls, were superior.
    In our late teenage years, when we were between 16 and 19 years old, we sometimes took the train to Copenhagen to visit Christiania or go to a disco to have some fun.
    We always had some of our girls of our own age with us, and our moms always told us to look after the girls (passe godt på pigerne), because we were expected to protect them if necessary.
    This made us very proud, and if some guys in Copenhagen didn't respect our girls, or tried to mob them, we certainly reacted, and often quite violently. Often the young guys in the Capital mistook us for hippies because of our long hair. But if they annoyed or provoked us, or even worse our girls, they soon found out, that we were not the soft hippie guys that they thought us to be.
    That the roles between the girls and us boys somehow were reversed on our trips to Copenhagen, strengthened our self confidence. And we of cause enjoyed the admiration our girls openly showed us in those kinds of situations.
    So I don't think that boys raised in Female Led families automatically tend to be soft or pacifistic young men. In my experience quite the opposite.


    I don't write about my upbringing and life in a Female Led Community in order to convert other people to live in the same way. Or to say that our way of life is better than other people's way of life.
    I only want to tell people who might be interested, that a Female Led Family can work just as well as a Male Led Family can.
    And in the same way as it in most cases is not degrading for a woman or a girl to live in a traditional patriarchal family, it also is not degrading for a man or a boy to live in a matriarchal family like ours.

    Another reason for me to tell about my own experience with living in a Female Led family, which I still do together with my beloved wife Larissa, is that I during the Corona Lock Down here in Denmark have spent some time reading about Female Superiority on the Internet.
    In many of these narrations of Female Led family life, a lot of spanking of boys and even of men is involved. And boys are not allowed to contradict the girls, and so on.
    But this was not so among us. Although the girls of cause were exempt from corporal punishment, we boys were never spanked.
    And our female mothers valued free speech, also for their children, girls and boys alike.

    Fortunetely for me and the other boys in our little community the women and girls of our Female Led Community besides the use of corporal punishment for us boys also used a varity of more subtle ways to demonstrate the superiority of the girls and the necessity for us boys to obey our moms and our teenage sisters.

    For instance I as a boy of cause was free to contradict my dear little sister Ida, and even to contradict our mom.
    In one of my post I have told of how our mother, when I became a teenager, more often than before taught Ida and me about the fact of Female Superiority, always ending with emphasizing, that although Ida was three years younger than me, she all the same was vastly superior to me.

    (Of cause mom didn't use this english phrase. She actually said in danish: "Tjeik, glem aldrig, at Ida er dig totalt overlegen" which means: "Tjeik, do never forget that Ida is vastly (or totally, if it is correct to use that word in this connection in English) superior to you").

    Well, although I accepted what our mom told us, the suggestion that my little sister should be not only superior, but vastly superior to me, always embarrassed me, and made me blush. I often tried to argue, that considering the age difference between us, Ida and me were equals.
    But our mom just smiled, and said, that "there is no such thing as equality between sisters and brothers". ("Der er aldrig lighed mellem søstre og brødre", as she said in Danish).
    So you see, I argued with my mother, and she didn't mind.
    She even encouraged it, because it gave her an opportunity to argue for the fact of female superiority, that girls are more mature than boys and so on, and of cause mom's arguments were much better than mine.
    But it also was one of mom's principles, that everything should be allowed to be questioned. And children should be taken seriously.
    It was after all by questioning the "truths" of the patriarchal society that mom and her feminist friends had found the opposite and more valid truth of the inherent superiority of girls versus boys, and hence the superiority of the average woman to the average man.

    And Ida greatly profited from mom's discussions with me about girls being vastly superior to boys.
    Because thereby she learned not only THAT she as a girl was superior to me, but she also learned WHY girls are superior to boys.
    And of cause it made her very proud of being a girl.
    If mom had just silenced me by a face slap or by a spanking, Ida would only have learned the "language of power" so to speak.

    It is only natural for siblings that they sometimes quarrel.
    Even Ida and me, who loved each other very much, sometimes did that.
    And I was never punished for contradicting Ida on those occasions.
    If mom was present when we quarreled, with she sometimes was, I think it filled her with pride to hear the often very clever arguments which Ida set forth, because she always won our disputes. Not by the use of threats, but by the use of words combined with superior intellect.
    That to me is a real prof of girl superiority.
    Mom had every reason to be proud of her daughter.
    But when we after such a quarrel lay in our big double bed in the late evening, Ida would always tease my about it.
    She did it in her girlish way, but she didn't stop before she noticed, that my growing embarrasment had caused me an involuntary erection.
    This was a subtle but effective way for Ida to remind me of the fact, that she was superior to me. Because mom had told, that an involuntary erection caused by embarrassment in the presence of a girl is a bodily sign beyond the boy's control which shows that he recognizes the superiority of the girl.
    After such an embarrassing experience it would take a long time before I would dare to quarrel with Ida again.

    So as I said before: Ida and the other girls and women of our Female Led Community used many more subtle ways to demonstrate their superiority to us boys than only using corporal punishment.
    And their subtle methods were in my experience every bit as effective.

    In our Female Led Community all of our rules were made by the adult women in their Woman Meetings, and the rules they agreed upon were by no means optional.
    They were compulsive.
    As my mother always said: "Rules are made to be followed. Not to be broken".
    You may object, that in one of my post I said, that there was no compulsion in our community.
    But that is only true in regard to the young adult men, who lived together with some of the women as their lovers. If they wanted to stay with us, they had to follow the rules of the women, or else they were free to leave. And if they did, there were no ill feelings.
    But we children had to follow the rules.
    And as it was not optional for me to obey my dear little sister Ida when she turned 13, and thereby became a teenage girl - mom simply told me that I had to - it was not optional for any of us boys to only wear briefs in the summer period. Our moms simply told us that we had to follow this restriction

    Back in the month of August 1978, when our mom started at a full time job, my dear little sister Ida begann to act as mom's substitute when mom was not at home, as I have told.
    This included that Ida had to tell me what work I had to do at home, when we came home from school.
    Actually she told me early in the morning what she wanted me to do, and what she herself would have to do.
    In the beginning I sometimes tried to argue with her, because I could be a bit lazy back then, as I have told, but she never gave in to me, she always stood firm. She just smiled at me and said, that she had to decide.
    I soon learned, that it didn't help to argue with Ida, and so I stopped doing it, and I just did what she told me to do.
    A person who is given authority has to be consistent, I think, as my little sister Ida was. Especially when the authority person is a woman or a girl, as Ida was back then, and the person who has to obey her is a man or a boy, who is physically stronger than her., as I was in regard to Ida.
    I gave in to Ida and obeyed her, not because I was afraid of being face slapped by her - which she seldom did, but it really hurt and was humiliating for me when she did it - but because I respected her consistency and her fairness.
    She never demanded more work from me than she did herself, although we had different chores to do.
    To have to obey my mother and later on my dear little sister really made me much more able to accept female dominance socially and thus a better partner to girls and lastly to Larissa, who chose me as her partner when we both were young, than I otherwise would have been.

    You might wonder why I put up with this. After all I was much stronger than Ida.
    Well, first of all I had always been told that unless you yourselves is being attacked by a girl, the use of force against a girl is the worst thing a boy can do.
    It is utterly shameful and disgraceful for him.
    So the thought of using force against Ida or any other girl never came into my mind.
    But then there also was the very strong bond between Ida and me.
    Before moving to the newly founded Female Led Community in the year of 1970, our little family had lived at different places. As I have told, mom had different lovers, so Ida and me only had mom and each other.
    And as Ida admired me for my physical strength, and often expressed it, I admired her for her mental strength and for her fairness and intelligence and her caring and loving way.

    But I will add, that as important as it is for young males to learn to respect girls and women and get used to female superiority, it is of equally importance, that girls and women also respect the qualities of the boys and men. Because respect always has to be mutual.

    Our mom loved me every bit as much as she loved Ida.

    And as told Ida admired me for my strength and openly said it. And when we were on a trip to Copenhagen Ida told me that she always felt safe in my company, even if we were in an unruly part of the city, as for instance The Free Town of Christiania. This of cause made me proud and gave me some self confidence, which young boys and men always ought to have, I think.
    From very early on I also had a strange ability to endure pain, which was also admired by the other children. And most of us boys, including me, had a much better sense of direction than had the girls and the women. Without me to guide them mom and Ida would often be lost if we were in unfamiliar places.
    Those examples, where we boys were superior to the girls were freely recognized by the women, who also very much respected us for the physical hard labour we performed.
    So in our Female Led Community the respect between the sexes was mutual. As it always should be.
     
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  5. Tjeik
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    As I have told before, our girls were not allowed to wear any kind of cosmetics, and they couldn't spend money on fashion clothes, because our mothers were very much against it, opponents of the capitalistic consumer society as they were, and we also could not afford it.
    So instead of spending much money on fashion clothes, our girls spend much time on making clothes together with our moms. Mostly in the hønsestrik style. (You can find pictures of it on Google by writing "hoensestrik").
    Most of those beautiful clothes our mothers sold to earn some money.

    In the summer time we boys were busy picking strawberry and harvest potatoes in our moms large fields.
    Later on in the season we collected a wide variety of berries and apples and pears in our moms orchards.
    Most of it was sold, and people gladly came to us to buy our products.

    We also had a lot of animals.
    Not only dogs and cats - Ida and me had a dog, whose name was Rolf - but also hens and chickens (because of the eggs, which we also sold) and even sheep because of the wool.
    It was the women and the girls who had to care for the animals, except for the dogs.

    Although some of the women had a past time job, and their men had a full time job, we never had much money.
    My mom only got a full time job when Ida turned 13, and was able to take mom's place when she was not at home.
    (You should not compare our girls back then with average teenage girls. Because our mothers gave their daughters great responsibility from quite early on, and they were used to work pretty hard, they were very mature even as 13 year old girls. Therefore you perhaps better should compare my dear little sister Ida at 13 with an average teenage girl of 15 or 16 year, I think).

    We really lived a very frugal life, as I have told.
    Non of us had a television.
    And of cause we had no cars either.
    We had radios and telephones, but not televisions.
    If we children wanted to watch something on television, we did it by visiting our friends in the nearby village.
    Their world was a kind of wonder world to us.
    They had a lot of things that our moms couldn't afford to give us.

    But strangely enough our community also seemed to be attractive to our village friends.
    They liked to visit us, and did it very often.
    In the long evening hours we used to play a wide variety of games. Chess for instance or draughts, but also many card games.
    And our moms often read stories aloud for us children.
    We also told each other stories.

    It perhaps sound idyllic. And it was.
    But there also was a dark side to it.
    In what I today call the fanatical period of our little Matriarchy some of us boys had to suffer because of some crazy ideas, which our mothers got by reading about the ancient Matriarchies.

    But again: If you try to create a wholly new type of society, this new society more often than not will have some bad sides.
    No society or community is perfect.
     
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  6. Kylara
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    Kylara Happy feminized sub owned by Mistress PHEBUSA

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    Thanks for your testimony, this is a 70's very interesting utopia project, it remind me the Kibboutz and some hippies Community in a way.
    Can you go further? when and with who do you experience your first sexual experience and how it was? How do you feel it? have you learn to please women or do men were allowed to have relation between them?

    And how do you evolve after your childhood into this community.

    But it is quite an impressive experience and it is very nice to read it.
     
  7. madams-sissysub
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    Fascinating reading, thanks for taking the time to post.
     
  8. Jah Rubbings
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    Jah Rubbings Jah Rubbings

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    Fascinating story. Yes, do please keep going. You have a unique perspective that is really interesting. Thank you for sharing.
     
  9. Tjeik
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    Dear Kylara, and dear madams-sissysub and Jah Rubbings

    Thank you very much for your kind words, but first of all thank you because you have reacted.
    I welcome every kind of reactions, also the negative ones.
    If some of you think, that I and my friends from our old Female Led Community are a bunch of crazy people, you are very welcome to say this, and argue for it.
    Or if you think, that my posts are too long, please say it.

    Kylara ask me some questions which I will answer in this and in two following post:

    "Have you learn to please women"?

    Yes, my mother told me, that when I got a girlfriend and she wanted to have sexual intercourse with me, then it would be my duty to warn her when I could feel the urge to ejaculate, so not to risk her getting pregnant, as I have explained it in one of my posts. Among us the girl or woman always sits on top of the boy or man during intercourse, simply because she has to control the sexual act in order not to get pregnant. Today some of the young women in our Female Led families use birth control pills, but they did not use them in my youth. And back then condoms were not easy to get at for us young boys, because we could not buy them in the nearby village.

    As a young teenage boy of 16-17-18 years I had several girlfriends, although only one at a time. This was partly due to the concept of free love, which our feminist mothers adhered to, as did almost all progressive young people at that time.
    But the girls of our community also considered it an affront to them, if a boy openly said no to a girl when she proposed him to start a sexual relationship, "at blive kærester", as we said in danish. This, I think, may have been a consequence of the girls constantly being told by their mothers, that they were superior, because this belief inevitably made it difficult for some of our girls to understand and accept a rejection.
    When we were teenagers, it normally was the girl who took the initiative to engage in a relationship by proposing it to the boy she wanted, but of cause sometimes a boy would ask a girl whom he liked if she would be his girlfriend. But if a girl said no to us, we always had to accept it, because - as our mother had told us - a girl ultimately risked to become pregnant, and therefore a boy should always respect a no from a girl. Of cause condoms and birth coltrol pills were invented, but they were not always ready at hand, as I already have told.
    I don't think that this was unfair or a double standard, considering the potential consequences of sexual intercourse for the girl.
     
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  10. Tjeik
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    Tjeik Member

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    Kylara also asked me:

    "Do men were allowed to have relation between them?"

    I guess, that the question is, if homosexuallity was allowed among us in our Female Led Community?

    Well, there never were any homosexual relations between us boys or between the young men who lived among us as the lovers of some of the women. Not to my knowledge. And our community being a fairly small community, I certainly would have known about it if there had been.

    But I am quite certain that if there had been homosexual couples among us, our moms would surely have accepted it.
    Even in their most Female Superiority and Matriarchy oriented period our moms did not try to persuade other people to live according to our Female Led principles.
    I of cause know, that many small religious or ideological groups are very intolerant and missionary, but our feminist mothers were not.
    They lived by the principle, that if you want to be accepted by other people, you also have to accept those other people and their way of life yourselves.

    What also make me so sure that I am answering correctly here is the fact, that some of our feminist moms actually knew homosexual men, and that they always spoke well of them.
    What the women of our community didn't like, was male chauvinist who did not respect women.
    But homosexual men do not act in a male chauvinistic way towards women, and they also never have a hidden agenda in their relationships with women.
    So I am quite sure, that if I or some of our other boys had turned out to be gay, our moms most certainly would have accepted it.

    Please remember, that there was no compulsion in our community. At least not among the adult people. Everyone was free to leave if she or he did not want to live according to our principles, and there never were ill feelings towards those who chose to leave.
    In fact they often came to visit us after they had moved to some other place.

    But there was one sexual minority which our mothers did not tolerate. It was the pedophiles.
    Well, that's obvious, you might say.
    And yes, that's obvious today.
    But it was not obvious back then. At least not among young progressive leftist people in Denmark.

    In those days back in the 1970s it was quite common among so called "progressive people" in Denmark to say, that "children are sexual beings to" (which is true), who want to explore their sexuality together with adult people (which is not true).
    In the year of 1971 the "Free Town Christiania" (Fristaden Christiania) was established in the heart of Copenhagen by young progressive leftist people, who occupied an area with many old, large and good buildings, which formerly had belonged to the danish military.
    There they established their own socialist utopian society (as our moms a year before had established their smaller Female Led Community in rural surroundings) and absolute sexual freedom was one of the rules of the Christiania Community.

    Many of the kids who grew up in Christiania later on told, how they were sexually abused by the adults. Mostly by men, but also by women, who considered themselves to be politically and sexually progressive.
    The 1970s was a decade were many of the rebellious and experimenting young people went to the extremes all over Western Europe.
    And also our mothers growing fascination with the Matriarchy and Goddess Worship ideas eventually turned into a form of fanaticism, as I have told, but they never accepted pedophilia, although it was a common practice to do so among young leftist people back then.

    Perhaps you won't believe it, but child pornography was legal in Denmark in the 1970s. It only became illegal by the introduction of a new law in 1980.
    So the danish society at large also accepted this filthy exploitation of children.

    Our Female Led community did not.
    Which to me is one of many profs that women are morally superior. They generally are much more empathetic, they care more for children than the average man do, and a woman instinctively knows, that pedophiles should never be accepted.

    Female Led is better led.
    Not always of cause, but often.



    The answer to Kylara's question about my first sexual experience must wait, but I promise to write and post it in the early evening.
    Please read it, because it is of great importance.
    It is about the girl Hanne and her family.
    A family, that unfortunately had a very false and fatal misconception about what Female Superiority means and implies.
     
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  11. Tjeik
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    #11 Tjeik, Aug 2, 2021
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    As promised I will now answer Kylara's question about my first sexual experience, but first I have to tell about the family of Hanne, whom I at first detested, but who later became my girlfriend.

    Hanne, was a girl of my own age, from a quite extraordinary family, which was one of the founding families of our community. Or perhaps I should better say, that Hanne's and her brothers' mother, whose name was Clara, was among the original founders of the community, because as I have told in previous post all property was owned by the women in common.

    Hanne had two brothers: Martin, who was one year older than Hanne and me, and Peter, who was about two years younger than Hanne.

    Hannes mother Clara was one of the few feminist women of our community, who lived with the same male partner throughout the years. His name was Morten, and although they were not married (our feminist mothers considered marriage to be a patriarchal institution), I believe that Morten was the father of all of the children. But I am not sure.

    What made Hanne's family special, even in our Female Led Community, was the parents very unjust treatment of their children.

    Hanne was a tall and strong girl. She clearly was what in English is called a tomboy, and she always bullied her brothers around: She made them do most of her tasks in the house and in the garden, which meant, that in addition to their own work duties and their schoolwork Martin and Peter seldom had some spare time. And if they didn't do what Hanne ordered them to do, she slapped them in the face, or even kicked them in their testicles.

    Naturally the parents knew all this - we all did - but they did not interfere. Which of cause was contrary to our common ideal, that although girls were considered to be superior to boys, they should not misuse their superiority in any way, and they of course were expected to work as we boys were, and not let their brothers do their work for them.

    This was bad enough, but it was not the worst thing for the boys in that family:

    What Hanne's brothers resented the most, was the sad fact, that every time at Christmas or at birthdays Hanne was given expensive gifts by the parents, whereas her brothers only got some plates of chocolate, some cakes and things like that. This unfair treatment of her brothers I already then found outrageous, and so did my mom. Although my sister Ida was superior to me, our mom loved me every bit as much as she loved Ida. Ida never let me do her work, and at Christmas and at our birthdays we both got gifts of equal value. And so it was in all the other households of our community, as far as I know. I really could not understand, why Morten, the children's father, did not protest. But he never did. Perhaps he didn't dare, but I am more inclined to believe that he thought that it was right to let Hanna be the princess of the house, with no restrictions or duties what so ever.

    As Hanne was the princess in her own home, she was the queen among the girls. She almost always was surrounded by an entourage of younger girls, who admired her.

    She often sought to put up a fight with us boys. But only with boys of her own age or older. This she did to impress her admires among the girls, I think.

    She often picked on me to provoke me into a fight, which was very annoying because of her bad habit of kicking boys in the testicles. But we boys, who risked to be attacked by Hanne, was prepared for this, so she seldom managed to hit her target. Although we boys normally were strictly forbidden to hit a girl, of cause we defended ourself if attacked by a girl like Hanne, and none of our moms objected to that. Although Hanne was very strong for a girl of her age when she was 14-15 years old, I always managed to beat her or to chase her away. I remember one winter day, where Hanne and her girlfriends attacked my friend Knud and me with snowballs. Knud said, that we better should go away, because he was afraid of Hanne, but I took up the fight, and finally it was Hanne who left. But this only provoked Hanne to act ever more challenging towards me, and on a hot summer day the next year my luck was out.

    I think I have to tell what happened, even if it was humiliating for me, because I think it tells something about Hanne's character. It as always was she who started the fight by provoking me and trying to make me ridiculous before her girlfriends, but as I was about to get a hold on her and bring her down, she managed to grip me by my long hair and pull my head backwards, and she swiftly used my moment of distraction to grip me by my testicles and squeeze them with full force. I of cause moaned and bent over. Immediately she pushed me to the ground, and the next moment she was straddling my chest, pinning my arms down. While her girlfriends shouted with joy, she began tickling me around my belly bottom, which made me laugh, despite the pain in my testicles. It was one of the worst days in my life, as I lay naked and defeated beneath Hanne, yet laughing because she made me to. And I was sure, that she would now pull down my briefs as her ultimate humiliation of me. (Of cause I had no erection. You don't have an erection with painful testicles). But Hanne did no such thing. Instead she asked me, if I would surrender, and when I said yes, she immediately got of me and rose, and she even shooked my hand and said, that it had been a good fight.
    This told me, that Hanne's wish was not so much to humiliate me, but rather to show her girlfriends how brave and strong she was.
    And now, when Hanne at long last had defeated me (although only once), she never tried to provoke me again. Now she seemed to respect me, and I also began reluctantly to respect her. When we played "nybyggere og indianere" (white settlers and indians), Hanne and me and some of the other boys of our age would meet beforehand to determine the rules of the game, where and when it should take place and so on.
    (We boys with our long hair and sun tanned bodies of course always were the indians, and the girls were the white settlers).

    But as the years passed by, and Hanne became a young woman, things went very bad for her.

    It is a very sad story. Her eldest brother Martin had already moved to Copenhagen to escape his sister's bullying when he was just 17 years old, and there he had got a job as an apprentice, while he lived by some friends of his in the city. Many years later I by chance meet Martin, and he told me, that Hanne later on also had moved to Copenhagen. She didn't have a husband, although she had had many boyfriends. But they all left her after a short while, because they could not put up with a young woman, who because of her upbringing was so self centered as Hanne was. And because she was not used to work, but to have her brothers to work for her, Hanne could not hold on to a job, and so she was unemployed for long periods of time. She ended up as an alcoholic and a drug addict, Martin told.

    Her brothers on the other hand did well in later life. But they did not continue the Female Led lifestyle of their parents' family, which I find quite understandable, given the bad experiences they had with living in a Female Led Family without restrictions of any kind for their sister.
    The family of Hanne and her brothers should be a warning example for all people, who consider living in a Female Led Relationship: Female Led does not mean Female Dictatorship. And if it does, then it most probably won't last longer than one generation. (And perpahs not even this).

    As I said, it is a very sad story, and I really feel bad for Hanne. I do not think that Hanne was a bad girl, her selfishness and her tough character were just the results of a bad upbringing without limits for her.



    By the way, Hanne was the only girl, who once did pull my briefs down: It was a month or so after she and I had had our last fight, and we were now on pretty good terms, as I have told. On a late afternoon when I was sitting in the backyard of our house and was working on something, Hanne came along and sat down besides me. We talked for a while, but suddenly she pushed me back, and then she pulled my briefs down without asking or saying anything. But Hanne always did what she wanted to do, and took what she wanted to take. She made me have an erection, and she forcefully pulled my foreskin back, which was very unpleasant for me. I didn't protest or try to defend myself out of fear that she would squeeze my testicles, which she hold in one of her hands. She let my testicles roll through her fingers, but she did not squeeze them. After a while she left me without saying a word. So perhaps she just did it out of curiosity. Or perhaps she did it in order to demonstrate her female superiority over me. Or a combination of both. But at least she was considerate enough to do it without any witnesses. But all the same it was an unpleasant experience for me. In the evening I found out, that my mom had seen it from our house. Hanne seems to like you, she said with a smile. But I answered, that Hanne was certainly not my girlfriend.

    But the next year, when Hanne and me were 16 years old, we had became kind of friends.
    Hanne was not my girlfriend in a sexual way. Actually I still never had had sexual intercourse with a girl, but that same summer Hanne would change that.
    I was together with some of my boyfriends in our spare time on a hot summer day. We were sitting in the wood, talking, when Hanne came by and joined us. When the other boys left, Hanne and me remained seated and continued to talk with each other.
    Then suddently Hanne, without asking me, pushed me on my back, pulled my briefs down and tickled my penis into an erection, which of cause did not take her long.
    She then lifted up in her long dress, pulled her panties down, and placed herself on my erected male member.
    Her movements gave me an enjoyable feeling, and she clearly enjoyed it to. From time to time she squeezed my testicles and pinched my erected penis at its base to make me soft, in order to avoid me ejaculating inside her. I of cause warned her beforehand when I could feel that an ejaculation was nearing, like my mom had told me to do if I had sexual intercourse with a girl, so that she did not get pregnant. Then Hanne would tickle my penis into another erection, and so it went on, until Hanne was satisfied, and she got of me.
    I of cause still had an erection, but Hanne now masturbated me into a very forceful ejaculation, so that I got semen all over by chest and stomach. I felt exhausted, but it was a very extraordinary and good feeling.
    Hanne smiled, and gave me some leaves from the forest floor to dry myself up with.

    After that I for several month was Hanne's boyfriend. During that time I more than once tried to persuade her to stop bullying her brothers around and treat them in a more fair way, but she wouldn't discuss that matter. Each time I talked about it she gave me a stinging slap to my face and said, that "det rager ikke dig". ("It's not your business"). She eventually got tiered of me, and found another boyfriend - Hanne always got tiered of her boyfriends - but we still were friends.
    Therefore I also feel so sad for what happened to her in her later life.
     
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  12. PawEee
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    #12 PawEee, Aug 2, 2021
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2021
    Thank you so much Tjeik, for this fascinating post.
    That was very interesting story. It might be interestingv as well what attracted you to this community of men’s chastity fans? Did this unique childhood influenced your adult sexual life? Could you reveal something about it?

    I was in Denmark in 1983 and it impressed me immensly to see danish fantastic social organization, visit Christiania and be hosted by a huge family or Wohnungsgemeinschaft with some 6 or 8 couples living in one huge flat in Copenhagen. I still have sn admiration for Denmark with new impressions of Kobenhavn and this fantastic society that always explores things important for mankinds future.
     
  13. Tjeik
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    Dear PawEee

    You ask me:

    "Did this unique childhood influenced your adult sexual life? Could you reveal something about it?"

    Yes, of cause my upbringing in a Female Led Community with plenty of self confident and strong minded, beautiful (because simple and natural) and caring girls of all ages, whom we boys from early on learnt to respect, and who also respected us (and this is important), has very much influented my whole adult life, and not only my sexual life as an adult.
    (Of cause the girls would sometimes tease us boys. Peoples are not angles. But mostly in a kind girlish way).

    That the teenage girls in our community were given the full authority over their brothers when the adults were not at home was not only due to practical reasons.
    It of cause also was a way that our mothers used in order to prepare both their daughters and their sons for their future roles in life, if they chose to stay in our Female Led Community as adults. In fact it was of especially importance for our moms to make sure, that their daughters did not misuse their power, because as the wise women they were they knew, that if we boys did not accept the Female Led way of things, their community would not last for long.
    I think that I have shown this fact very well in describing the loving relation between my dear little sister Ida and me. Also after our mother authorized Ida to act as mom's substitute in mom's absence.

    Later on I will tell you how Larissa chose me to be her male partner, and how our very Matriarchal inspired wedding ritual was performed.
    And also about how I have lived with my beloved wife Larissa in a loving Female Led Relationship ever since, and about our four children.
    But it will take some time before I do it, and I think I will do it in another thread, because this thread is long already.
    I don't think that people like to read long threads on Internet.
     
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    Fantastic, and fantastic that your relationship with some beloved girl from the same community was life-long and so long-lasting.
    I look forward to read more on your unique experience, that is so interesting. And one could dream about femele led society. We all expect such leadership to be more empatic to people and the natural environment.
     
  15. Tjeik
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    Perhaps one of the most fundamental differences between us girls and boys who grew up in our small Female Led Community and most other women and men, who are living in a Female Dominated way is, that the males in such a relationship want it themselves, because they tend to be submissive, and the women I guess also want it, because they tend to be dominant.

    But we boys in our Female Led Community were not born submissive - as I have told already, we on the contrary could be quite violent, if somebody threatened our girls or our friends - but we were taught by our mothers from very early on about the inherent superiority of girls to boys to such a degree, that we simply accepted this to be a fact. And of cause our sisters did the same, and it made them very proud and self-confident, which only confirmed for me and the other boys that the girls indeed were vastly superior to us. (Which they definitely were).

    I cannot deny, that it for me back then was embarrassing to know, that I was inferior to my dear little sister Ida, who was three years younger than me, and to all other girls.
    But in a strange way it also was fascinating and seductive for us boys to know, that the girls were superior to us.
    Because as boys often do, we admired strength. Because of the physically hard work that our moms ordered us to do, we were rather strong ourselves. We didn't look like body builders - far from it - but we were quite strong.
    But our girls were strong too. They were even stronger than us, although it was on the mental and intellectual level. This sometimes made us fell humble, but it certainly also made us admire the strong minded girls of our community.
    And the boys from the nearby village felt the same way. They considered our girls to be more mature than the girls in their own village (and of cause they were because of the authority and responsibility our girls in their teenage years were given by their mothers), and they stopped teasing us about the fact that we had to obey our sisters. Some of our boyfriends from the village later on as young adults even married some of our girls and moved to our community to live with them according to our Female Led principles.

    The fact that our mom on Ida's thirteenth birthday on the second of June 1978 had told my dear little sister and me, that I from now on would have to obey Ida, when mom was not at home, of cause made Ida very proud.
    It was in what I now call "the fanatical Matriarchal period" of our community, where our moms read a lot of books about ancient Matriarchies, Goddess centered religions and rituals, Female Superiority and stuff like that.
    Ida was very fascinated by all this Matriarchy stuff, which our mom told us about, and how shouldn't she be? Even I was fascinated by it to a certain degree, and I was not a girl...
    Already back then Ida dreamed of being the Matriarch of her own family some day in the distant future. I know it, because she talked a lot with me about it.

    Her being in charge of me when mom was absent was a preparation for her future role in life, you might say.

    But you should not think, that Ida or the other girls of our Female Led Community were allowed to bully us boys around.
    (The family of Hanne, that I have told about above, was an exeption, but they unfortunately didn't live according to our moms ideals of Female Superiority, which included mutual respect and love).

    In some cases it even were the girls, who were treated unjust by our mothers, I have to say.
    The authority given a young teenage girl like my little sister Ida could easily backfire on her, so to speak.

    I will give an example of this from my own little family:

    Shortly before Christmas 1979, when Ida was 14 year old and I was 17 year old, our mother, who worked at the Sociology Faculty at the University at Copenhagen at that time, had to help arranging an academic conference of some sort, and she therefore had to be away from home from Friday morning to Sunday evening. Strange as it may seem, we very much celebrated Christmas, and Ida and me used to get nice Christmas presents, because Chrismas was the Winter Solstice, which according to our mothers was an important holiday in the Matriarchal Calendar.
    So Ida and me had a lot to do preparing for Christmas. ("Jul" is the word used in Danish, and Jul is a pre-christian word, derived from danish word "hjul", which means "wheel").

    As a substitute for my mother who was away, it was Ida's responsibility to organize the work and to tell me, what she wanted me to do.
    On Saturday she told me to go to the grocery shop in the nearby village to buy a lot of stuff, but I asked her if I could stay there for a while and talk with Tom, a boy of my age who was a friend of mine.
    Ida said yes, but she told me to come back quickly, because we both had a lot of work to do, and of I went.
    Well, both Tom and I were very fond of chess, and therefore we that day played a game of chess together. Although Tom was a better chess player than I, I won the game, and Tom then asked me for another game, to which I unfortunately said yes. This game Tom won, and then I forgot all about time, so we played a third and decisive game, which Tom also won. And after that we even analyzed our chess games.
    Therefore it was already dark evening, before I came back home.
    Of cause Ida was very angry at me. She scolded me, and gave me a stinging slap to my face.
    I of cause apologized. But although on the next day, which was Sunday, we both tried to make up for the time I had lost, we didn't manage to do all which mom expected us to do before our mother came back home that evening.
    Mom of cause at once noticed, that we were afterwards with the Christmas preparations, and Ida of cause then told her that it was my fault, because I had stayed with my friend Tom almost the whole Saturday long.
    But that explanation did not satisfy mom. She was furious. Not with me, but with Ida. I clearly remember that mom with an angry reprimanding voice said to Ida, that: "You knew exactly where Tjeik was. You should have fetched him and dragged him home by his hair, if necessary (om nødvendigt trække ham med hjem ved håret)". Mom even went so far as to imply, that Ida was not worthy of her trust and of being her substitute when she was not at home, which made Ida have tears in her eyes. I tried to intervene on Ida's behalf, but mom did not blame me, because I was a boy, who didn't have the responsibility. Ida on the other hand she considered to be a mature girl who had been given the authority, and she had failed.

    I felt that this treatment was unjust to Ida, even if I was spared from reproach.
    And Ida most certainly felt in the same way.
    That night neither Ida nor I could sleep. Ida kept reprimanding and blaming me with a whispering voice. She was so mad at me, that she even tried to squeeze my testicles. But I grabbed her by her wrists, and forced her arms back. In her anger she then smashed her knee right into my groin, and hit my testicles. That really really hurt, and mom woke up by the noise of me moaning in pain. But again she scolded Ida. "Don't hurt Tjeik in the groin because of your shortcomings" ("spark ikke Tjeik i skridtet for dine fejltagelser"), she reprimanded Ida with a stern voice.
    The next morning, while we still were laying in our double bed, I again tried to tell Ida how sorry I was for what had happened, but she was still mad at me. But then I said, that I really deserved her kicking me in my testicles during the night, at that made her smile. A little later she hogged me, and forgave me.

    After mom's unfair treatment that day shortly before Christmas I never let Ida down again. And she never had to punish me any more. Because I loved Ida with brotherly love, I of cause did not want to bring her in a similar situation once again, so this experience certainly made me a lot more considerate and responsible than I was before.

    As adults Ida and I have sometimes talked about this episode, and today we tend to think, that mom perhaps was wise to scold Ida and not me, because she of cause knew of the strong bond between us, and that I probably would adjust my behavior for the sake of my dear little sister.
     
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  16. Tjeik
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    If I scroll down to the bottom of any thread on this Forum, I see this warning:

    "Ignore Threads by Nobita".

    Who is this Nobita, and why should we ignore her threads?
     
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  17. Jah Rubbings
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    Jah Rubbings Jah Rubbings

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    Lol. I've always wondered too.
     
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    @Tjeik, thank you for generously sharing stories about your upbringing. Yours is one of the most fascinating stories I have read in a long time. I do hope you will continue now we are getting to know both you and your sister. I can’t wait for the next chapter!
     
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    Yes. This rings so true to me, and because it is a true story I think you could and perhaps should write a book from your Female Led Community experiences! But I hope you continue your writings right here soon. I am particularly curious about what became of it all. Everybody changes with time and communities change.

    Please don't apologize for the length of your posts. I, for one, have read every single word.
     
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  20. Tjeik
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    In the Female Led Community where my little sister Ida and I grew up, the women used corporal punishment when they were punishing us boys, while the girls were exempted from corporal punishment. Even our teenage sisters were authorized my their mothers to punish their brothers in this way.

    But girls and the women have much more subtle ways to assert their authority.
    I have experienced it myself. First as a boy, and later on as Larissa's husband.

    In the little Matriarchy of my childhood, we of cause all knew each other very well.
    We boys knew much about the girls.
    But the girls knew everything about us boys. Much more than we knew about them.
    Nothing could be kept a secret for the girls. We boys were quite transparent to them.
    Of cause we boys had our secrets, and if we were lucky we could keep them from the other boys.
    But we never managed to keep our secrets hidden from the girls, They always somehow found out.
    We on our part never managed to disclose the girl's secrets. The girls being very secretive. And as teenage girls our girls had many thing which they hold secret from us boys.

    Knowledge is power, and the girls instinctively understood it much better than did we boys.
    It was a clear evidence of the social superiority of the girls, and of the social power they enjoyed because of it.

    And of cause also our bodies and our bodily functions were plain open for the girls to see.

    As I have told in one of my post, in our Female Led Community the women upheld the rather old fashioned rule, that it was strictly forbidden for us boys to masturbate.
    And when I was a teenage boy my mother gave my little sister Ida the task to watch over that I did not masturbate during the night. (As I have told we slept together in a big old double bed).
    Masturbation was a punishable offence, because a masturbating boy risked losing some of his strength to work and ability to concentrate, our mother always told Ida and me.
    And if a boy had a girlfriend, it would make his girlfriend really angry if she suspected him of having the nasty habit of masturbation, because it proved, that the boy did not really respect the girl, who ought to be the sole focus of his sexual energy.
    Nocturnal ejaculations, caused by wet dreams, on the other hand, were never punished. And of course not, because this was only normal, as our mother said, and something that every boy had from time to time.

    But this did not mean that I had to live in chastity.
    (To my knowledge, chastity devices for men did not exist in Denmark back then. And if they did, non of us knew about them).

    As siblings often do, Ida and me sometimes engaged in petting, and after she turned 13, Ida became much more interested in this kind of activity.

    It actually was our mom, who turned on Ida's interest in petting.
    One early morning in the autumn of 1978, when mom noticed that I had a morning erection, mom said to Ida that next summer she would be 14 year old, and some day she perhaps would have a boyfriend which she might want to have a sexual relation with, so she better in time had to learn how to control a boys sexual organs in order to prevent him from ejaculate inside her and make her pregnant.
    Mom then gently squeezed my testicles and pinched me at the base of my penis, only causing me a minimum of pain, but enough to make my erection subside. Then mom tickled me to another erection, which was easily done.
    Ida was very curious, as a girl of her age naturally would be, and looked very happy when mom allowed her to do the same thing to me from time to time when she saw that I had a morning erection in order to get some practice.
    But then mom with a smile added: "Husk også at belønne Tjeik når du gør det (Don't forget do reward Tjeik when you are doing it)".
    By this mom of cause meant that Ida should finish of by letting me have an ejaculation, which Ida, as the mature girl that she was, clearly understood without further explanation.
    It was a win win situation for both of us: Ida learned how to avoid getting pregnant, and I got drained of some of my accumulated sexual energy.

    To begin with it was really painful when Ida squeezed my testicles. She didn't realize how sensitive they were. And how should she, being a girl?
    But she quickly learned to be as careful with my genitals as mom had been when she demonstrated the method to her.
    I really looked forward to our petting ritual, because Ida always finished by masturbating me to an ejaculation, as mom has told her to do.
    Next summer Ida actually got a boyfriend, and then her interest in the petting thing gradually diminished
    As a curiosity I remember, that Ida liked to pull me by my pubic hair when she was playing with my genitals. She even giggled when she did it.
    I don't know if Ida had hair down there at that time, but among us the rule of the women was, that everything had to remain natural. Mother Nature being one of their ideals.
    Therefore none of us boys shaved our pubic hair.
    But there was an inconsistency about it, because non of the young men of our community wore a beard. They were all clean shaved. And so were we boys when we became adults. And still are.

    Later on when both of us were adults I asked Ida why she had been so fond of our petting game. I got sexual release, but what did she get out of it, I had often wondered?

    She smiled and answered me, that being in control of my genitals gave her a powerful feeling, and when she was masturbating it turned her on to think about it.
    (It has always been perfectly legal among us for young girls to masturbate).
    She also told me, that the girls talked a lot about us boys (which I of cause knew), and that they compared us down to the smallest detail. (Which I fortunately didn't knew as a boy, because it would have been very embarrassing for me if I had known that).

    So as a teenage girl Ida certainly knew all about me and my bodily functions.
    But I knew very little about Ida in this regard.
    I for instance didn't know, when Ida began to menstruate. But of course at some point I noticed, that she had begun to menstruate, because Ida and mom sometimes talked about it with low voices, but they always closed the door when I was in the house.
    NOT because there was something for Ida to be ashamed about.
    But because it was a girl thing.
    Something that should not concern me as a boy.

    This secretiveness shrouded the girls in some kind of mystery, which in a subtle but very effective way confirmed me in my knowledge, that Ida was vastly superior to me, and that it therefore was the natural order of Mother Nature that I had to obey her like I obeyed mom, and later on of cause obeyed my beloved wife Larissa, as I still do, without she ever has had to face slap me, or even spank me.
    But as I often have told: Nobody was ever spanked in our Female Led Community.
     
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  21. Tjeik
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    Some people say, that boys don't have any sense of modesty, or that they don't ought to have it.

    If you read my above post, you perhaps think that I agree with this, but I do not.

    I totally disagree.

    Although I have to say, that in the summer time, when we boys only wore our briefs when we were in our community, we often on hot summer days, when we were working in the fields or in the orchards took off our briefs. But we only did it in order to have the same colour all over our bodies. If we saw that some of the girls or the women were coming, we hurriedly took our briefs on again. So of course we boys had a sense of modesty too, and I will try to explain a bit more about it here.

    As I have told before, I never feel any kind of embarrassment when I slept naked together with my sister Ida and mom in her bed beside ours, but they were my nearest family, and it had always been so.
    And as told in my previous post I enjoyed when Ida was petting me, but she was my dear little sister who always saw me naked.
    Actually I think, that the last time I saw Ida naked, she was about six year of age. Back then mom used to bath both of us together, but about the time when Ida turned seven or so, she stopped doing that, and started to bath us separately.

    But sometimes Ida's best girlfriend and classmate Louise came to sleep with us, and I certainly didn't like that.
    Most teenage girls like to sleep together with their girlfriends from time to time.
    We boys never slept together with our friends,
    I think it is a typical girl thing. Louise was my dear little sister Ida's best girlfriend. My little sister Ida is three years younger than me, and so was Louise. Mostly Ida slept with Louise at her place, but sometimes Louise slept together with Ida and me in our big old double bed. It happened from time to time in the years when the girls were between 11 and 14 year old, as far as I remember it, and I was between 14 and 17 year old.

    Louise's oldest brother Knud, who was of my age, was one of my best friends. Louise also had a younger brother, Arne, who was two years younger than Knud, and one year older than Louise.
    Louise was a very intelligent girl with long blond hair, and I really liked her. But I certainly didn't like it when she slept with Ida and me in our big double bed.
    I really felt humiliated when I had to be completely naked when Louise was present. Although she was a nice girl from our own community whom I knew very well, she all the same was a stranger. Of cause she saw me and all the other boys almost naked in the summer time, were we only wore our briefs. But we WORE briefs. The girls did not see our genitals.
    I especially resented it, when I had a morning erection. Then Louise would smile or giggle, which made me blush.
    (But I do not blame her, and I actually also did not blame her for it back then, because I knew, that it was as natural for a young girl like her to giggle as it was natural for me to feel humiliated in an awkward situation like this).

    Although Louise never teased me about it, I couldn't help thinking, that she was comparing me with her brothers.
    I hated it, and it shows that boys of cause have a sense of modesty too, and that it should be respected, just as we were told to respect the modesty of the girls.

    I never told Ida that I felt humiliated on those occasions when Louise slept with us, but of cause she knew. The girls knew everything about us boys.
    And as the caring and loving sister that she was, Ida almost always managed to have it so, that it was she who slept with Louise in Louise's house - Louise did not sleep in the same room as her brothers - but because there had to be some reciprocity, Louise sometimes had to sleep with us.

    Ida and Louise are still very close friends, and they both live in Female Led Relationships according to the principles of our mothers.
     
  22. Tjeik
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    An English speaking reader of my posts has kindly told me, that I in all of my posts consequently have spelled "of course" in the wrong way.
    I always wrongly wrote "of cause", and I am very grateful to him, that he has told me this.

    As a non English speaker it is of importance for me to write English in a way that cannot be misunderstood.
    Especially because - as I have told in my Introduction post - I really am a very bad English speaker (I sound like a clown if I try to speak your language), because due to our very frugal lifestyle in our Female Led self sufficiency community, that I have told you about, I have never been in an English speaking country. We could not afford long travels abroad.
    But I have read a lot of English books, because I am very interested in history. Therefore I can write English, and of course I understand spoken English, although I barely can speak it myself.

    You might also ask, why is it not Larissa and Ida who are telling the story of our Female Led Community?
    It of course ought to be one of them who tells you about our life, and not me.

    But unfortunately, non of them speak or write English. And it is sad, because most of the participants on this Forum seem to be men.
     
  23. elias
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    elias 6/7 on the TomAllen-Rectrix scale

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    Dear @Tjeik , I would like to compliment you for your languange skills but moreover for sharing with us your personal history. Thank you for doing that with us!
     
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  24. knight4princess
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    Yes Tjeik, your English skills are adequate enough to tell a very compelling story. Of course I noticed some errors but understood perfectly well what you meant. Perhaps you could ask your wife and sister what they recall and you could translate and tell their stories also.
     
  25. Tjeik
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    Dear knight4princess

    Thanks to you and to the others, who have commented on my posts.

    But where are the negative or skeptical comments?
    Has nobody something critical to say?

    Just because a story is true, it does not follow that all the conclusions drawn from the experiences that are told about in the life story of a person like for instance me need to be true also, I think.

    As an example I will use the Eye Contest, which I have told you about in my first post on this thread as being a prof of Female Superiority.
    Perhaps you remember, that the Eye Contest, that was introduced to our community by a group of visiting German feminist, was the contest where our mom told Ida and me to look each other straight into the eyes. To lower one's eyes would be a clear sign of recognition of the other person's superiority.
    Ida won the contest several times, to my great embarrassment, and this was taken of a clear prof of Female Superiority.

    And not only I, but ALL we boys lost in the Eye Contest with the girls from our community.

    Therefore this contest became very popular among our girls after the visit of the German feminists.

    Especially the more mature of the teenage girls preferred to prove their superiority and dominance in this way, because this was a pure mental contest, in which the stronger willed person always would win.
    And as told the girls always won the eye to eye contest, which often caused the loosing boy to get an involuntary erection out of sheer embarrassment, which on a warm summer day would be clearly visible as a growing bulge in his briefs.
    I can of my own experience tell, that this was very humiliating for us boys, because we obviously for all to see not only lost the control over our own body, but the control over our mind and body went to the girl, who made us to have the unwanted erection. But of cause it gave the girl a very powerful felling, and we all knew that.



    I would like to emphasize, that the above mentioned by no means happened on a daily or weekly basis. In fact it only seldom happened. But it did happen now and then, especially in the summer time, and of course the adults sometimes saw it.

    But the women just smiled. They clearly thought that a girl causing a boy to have an unwanted erection was just confirming her female superiority, and that the girl only used the female power that was rightfully hers. The adult men on the other hand seemed to be embarrassed if they witnessed such a situation. They often tried to look the other way and went away.

    This said I also must add, what I so often have said in my previous post, that the girls of our community were not wicked or evil. They were our dear friends and sisters, and they of cause never pulled our briefs down to totally humiliate a boy. The girls liked the feeling of being powerful - they freely told us that - but they would never humiliate us boys by pulling our briefs down. And if they had done, that would have been considered an abuse of their female superiority, for which their mothers would have punished them.

    But is all this really a proof that every girl is superior to every boy?

    Of this I was convinced in my boyhood, and also long after.
    But today I don't think so.

    Please remember, that in our community all girls were taught by their mothers from early on, that they were superior to us boys.
    And we boys were told to respect and obey the girls, because we were inferior to them.
    Therefore our girls naturally had a lot of self confidence, and I wonder if it was this upbringing that caused the girls always to win the look at each other eye to eye contest?
    Could it be a reflection of our upbringing, rather than a proof of every girl's superiority over any boy?
    Or to put the question otherwise: Would that same contest produce the same result - the girls winning every time - among girls and boys who are not living in a Female Led Community like ours?
    Today I don't think so.

    It is a fact, that young children are very easy to form according to the religious or ideological or otherwise ideas of the adults surrounding them. I could also say, that children are easy to manipulate.

    If you expect a child to be clever and bright, that child will normally try to fulfill your expectations. And if you consider a child to be more or less worthless, and treat the child accordingly, that child most probably will end up felling herself or himself to be worthless.

    We boys were absolutely NOT considered to be worthless by our mothers, but the prevailing female centered ideology of our small group certainly gave us strong feelings of inferiority towards girls.

    Today I think, that the gaze test only showed, that we children - boys and girls alike - acted as the adults expected us to act. In Danish we call it "en cirkeslutning" ("a circular conclusion").

    But I don't blame our feminist mothers. Life has taught me, that it is very common for people with strong ideological or religious beliefs to do everything in their power to prove the truth of their beliefs, and to interpret almost everything in the world in accordance with their beliefs.

    Of course I still believe, that girls are superior to boys. I certainly do not doubt this fact. It is only the about mentioned prof of the fact of the girl's superiority that I am questioning.
     

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