121 days.

Thank you.
This is a lot to respond to, Thankfully, I love writing about my relationship… so I’ll definitely get some of these answered soon

 

96 days to go…

Question time with IB-chaste

thanks for your journal.

You’re welcome. It’s not my first, but it’s definitely a slightly different journey this time around. I’ve not looked at them in a while, but I guess reading them now we’d seem like very different people.
https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/how-chastity-really-began-for-me.46890/

https://www.chastitymansion.com/for...extracts-from-my-boring-chastity-life….47655/

https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/little-extracts-of-2023.49315/

. There’s also some off shoots too

https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/going-cold-turkey.51597/

There could be more!.)

- You talk about a strapon and being locked up, but I didn't see you say that your lockup was 24x7 without release for PIV, nor have you said you would be denied orgasms. Is that part of your lockup?

The clue is in the countdown. My wife and I agreed that as my piercing wasn’t healing whilst we constantly played around that I’d be locked indefinitely until that changed. (https://www.chastitymansion.com/for.../self-piercing-stupidity-or-brilliance.51774/) The cage hasn’t been unlocked since mid-November.

My wife had her reservations about this as she likes PIV. She doesn’t mind me cumming at all, in fact I think she enjoys it, but she also likes the side of me whilst I’m denied. This lock up is a stop-gap to something different… the problem is: it’s working really well!

I have concerns about how I’ll feel if I get too much freedom afterwards. It all started as we were on rocky ground in regards to being caged 24/7, so we haven’t concluded the end game. I guess a lot about this is finding what works for us and then perhaps seeing how we incorporate that going forward.

I know right now, I don’t miss my full, uncaged orgasms. I do miss her touch on me, the feel of myself inside her and her face when she watches me cum. So there’s something else that could work better.

- You mention cumming while using the strapon. Forgive me for raising the question, but didn't you know you were reaching the PONR? Should you have stopped?

No. Why would I? In the past the agreement was that I’d have to tell her, or control myself… but something is lost in those moments.

Initially, chastity was introduced to add some fun into our lives. It can get over complicated as we learn new things about ourselves, but we shouldn’t forget why it started. If it was more fun for my wife if I never ejaculated again, then maybe I would prevent it. She actually prefers to know she’s pleasured me.

We can say chastity is about being better for our partners, but it’s also for us. My wife isn’t the sort that she really wants to frustrate me etc. we’ve tried all that and it wasn’t her natural setting, eventually that takes its toll. It’s her rejected. I enjoyed the lifestyle where she ‘controlled’ my orgasms, but I also enjoy this. Where she says there are no rules. Just relax and enjoy yourself.

- Your wife did mention that the strapon as not as warm as the real thing. I assume she prefers the real thing. Is there some reason why you use the strapon rather than figuring out ways to use your own body for her pleasure yet refrain from cumming. Particularly if you can cum while using a strapon, I'd think you should just toss the strapon.

Think I answered half of this, but tossing it away? No! I’m enjoying it. It’s nice to be able to have sex with my wife for longer than I could naturally do, without having to control myself at all, without the hassle of creaming etc. If she’s starting to feel positive towards this situation then it seems like something enjoyable we can continue to do. It’s clear it works for me. I know it’s starting to work for her, she actually joked with me, “last night was fun, we should do it again some time.” She doesn’t really say positive statements about sex, she doesn’t particularly want it discussing so much… so I know she definitely enjoy it.


- Do you find that sometimes your desire is out of sync with your wifes? I assume so. How do you manage being super horny when your wife is less so? Are you ever in danger of being a pest?

Yes! That’s where good communication comes into play. I don’t always capture everything, but when she told me a lot about how she was feeling about it all becoming about my needs again. I explained that it’s tough when I’m at the 10-14 day-ish stage, that’s when I’m the most horny. That’s how we basically decided I’d wait 2 weeks or so at a time, but the responsibility of deciding that timescale is on her, where as she has told me to hold back on my advances. Limit the my aspirations to please her sexually to twice a week. There the basic rules that allow this to work in harmony right now: No key use, 2 weeks minimum denial and 4 days between her orgasms.

If she wanted more I’d be willing, but actually, there’s something about enjoying the in-between times that is so much more enjoyable.

The greatest part of chastity that is out of sync is how much we both want to discuss it. Stopping myself constantly going on about it is the hardest part.

- Assuming you are seeing real benefits, have you considered making it permanent? In other ords, have you considered permanent chastity and semen retention? If so, or if not, why?

I think about it all the time: Could I handle that? I don’t know if I would want to. This works, but like I say, I miss out on other things. So does she.

If you then change that, if other options are on the table, that’s when choices come into play. Pressure for her to perform the right act at the right time. It’s more complicated. It breeds expectations that sometimes cannot be met.

That’s why I started the thread on different ways to manage chastity. To work out a good solution, I know what I would suggest, but I want to know what my wife has decided first. She actually tends to get things spot on. Permanent chastity could work, but I couldn’t tell you for how long, we’d both lose out on something and you have to have something to look forward to. That’s in all walks of life, whether it’s a new job, pay day, your next holiday… there’s got be something, otherwise the monotony takes its toll and you question what’s it all for?

- Does your wife ever consider a mutual scenario where she, too, is denied? In other words, why should you have all the fun? The act of physical selflessness in your relationship is kind of in one direction. True, it's part of your FLR, but is that ever questioned? Does your wife ever feel that you deserve pleasure, or at least the same level of sacrifice from her, as she is getting from you?

Ah. Well that’s a lot in one question. I think the FLR part has now just been stripped back to who we are, but now we use a cage. She’s naturally more dominant and demanding whereas I’m more submissive.

She does give me pleasure. That’s something we often forget when we think about the fantasy of chastity. I am denied because I want to be, I don’t think there’s is anyone who couldn’t say that. Our reasons can vary, but the heart of my desire for denial is more pure these days. It’s no longer the kink, it’s the rejection of the man that wanted that aspect in the first place. I feel better in day to day life just through orgasm reduction and reduced masturbation, that’s good self-esteem. I feel better day to day knowing that because of this I’m better for her. I feel happy that she gives me that opportunity… it’s a bit lame, but I’m thankful that she doesn’t feel like she can never satisfy me anymore. There’s a lot to be said about contentment.

There’s also a lot to be said for the sexual pleasure she gives me every two weeks, these experiences are far more substantial than when I received sex if and when I wanted. The orgasms I receive (without ever even touching my penis) are epic!

The one truth I haven’t told my wife is that sex just isn’t as good as those. Not for my sexual pleasure alone, but it gives something different, it’s an intimate connection that cannot be replicated so it will always be the most important act we do.

So really, If anyone is currently being denied right now, it is my wife. She doesn’t get dick. Which one of us is really selfless? That’s the question.

Then there’s the female denial aspect. Why would we go down that route? I might have considered it before as a bit of a kink, but what I really understand now is how male chastity has helped us grow. I don’t know if it would have the same effects if she was denied. The reasoning is simple. Although, I’m naturally more submissive in home life, I’ve always taken the lead in the bedroom… I know what I want, how I want it, when (all the time) etc. Taking that side away has allowed her to develop her own sexual identity. She can be dominant, she can add pain, she can frustrate… but she now knows what she enjoys, so the fact that she can simply tell me that she wants sex is massive. She wasn’t vanilla, but she wasn’t confident either. Having that confidence to say what she wants about something she previously struggled to talk about, that’s the only way we can go forward. She has put a lot of effort into giving me what I wanted from all of this, it is now my responsibility to listen to what she wants and come to a mutually beneficial scenario.


- Were you disappointed that you came this past weekend? Did you feel you lost and had to start over? If you did lose something, what was it (besides semen). Did you consider restarting the clock (assuming you have a set amount of time planned), In other words, are you simply going to go forward, or are you going to start over?

The only disappointment I felt, and it’s in no way dissatisfaction, is that I have to wait again for my next playtime. That sounds selfish, but when you are restricted in what you get, you can go months between getting the same thing again. She hasn’t even pegged me since I was locked up, that’s one of our favourites to both of us.. and now the wait starts again.

Yet, she knows me now. She knows I’ll be off my game for a few days but the caged orgasms don’t have that high impact, if she was disappointed she would have said something. She’s good at complaining.


- When you are not with your wife, are you ever tempted to have pleasureable sensations, even if it is not all the way? Are you able to resist? Or do you sometimes indulge? If you do resist, how do you.
- Even if you are not touching yourself, are you ever tempted with porn or erotica? Have they lost meaning to you?

First few weeks are rough. There’s times when I watch porn. Sometimes I think I could do with using my prostate massager… but ultimately I just think about how that would compare to what she could provide. I feel it’s worth the wait. Eventually, everything settles down anyway, the habits are broken and you don’t constantly crave everything you had before.

If she locked me and forgot, and she didn’t match my needs it could be a different story. That’s not the case, she understands me as I am learning to understand her… she wouldn’t leave me pointlessly frustrated unless she had just cause. It doesn’t benefit her for me to pester her or be overly needy.

- Do you ever create your own erotica in the absence of other forms of distractions? Do you find the journal posts are almost a form of that erotica. In other words, do you find that documenting your progress is somewhat erotic?

Actually, I write them because I enjoy writing them. It’s like a hobby. The subject matter is obviously something I enjoy so that helps. I actually like writing my stupid mind farts than about the sex but you’ve got to cater for all audiences (I say as if anyone reads my stuff!)

I was always terrible at English growing up so it’s something I sort of started for self development, but I think I’m past worrying about that too much now.

I did write erotica once https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/ruby’s-friends.50989/ , I got so involved in the storyline that I had to keep finding ways to add something sexy… that’s how things tend to work with me, everything spirals outwards and gets bigger than I ever intended. Eventually, after a break from it I lost track of the character developments! It’s supposed to be a sexy tale and I couldn’t think past motivations and how each character would react etc. it got pretty dark too…

The conclusion was going to be castration, and the storyline was going to show why you would accept that as something the main character deserved.

I don’t recommend. 1 star.

- Does your wife feel she is sacrificing through this somehow too? Does she sometimes resent what your doing. Has she ever considered stopping?

We’ve had our moments. It’s never always plain sailing.

I broke the lock off one of my cages I was so frustrated with her, I think that’s because she was upset about chastity. That’s why it’s so important to make it work two ways and for her to have the ability to tell me what she really wants.


- I believe you feel closer, more connected, more desireous through this. Do you know how she feels? Does she tell you, do you ask? Do you get feedback and is the feedback positive or negative?

She doesn’t discuss sex a lot, I don’t actually need her to tell me, I can read her. Every so often I try and ask, I think it’s once so far and that was a follow up from her telling me what she wanted. She said it’s good. That’s enough.


- In other aspects of your relationship besides the sexual area, has your relationship changed? Is the FLR primarily sexual or more/all aspects? Does that ever impact your sense of being a guy? Did you use to have control over some aspects of your relationship and do you still have them or are they all given up? Do you ever resent that?

Relationships change over time regardless. I cannot remember exactly how things were before and I’m happy with how they are now… so that works for me.

I don’t think of it as an FLR so much as just giving her what’s she wants, mostly without her having to ask for it. That’s just us. We’re actually working towards being more mutually balanced… but that just doesn’t seem to fit so well and we find ourselves back down our natural path.

I remember quite fondly how she grew quite drastically once I was supporting her more thoroughly. She got a new job and then subsequently promoted, before leaving and finding another job. Previous to all of this she was in a rut with her life on that front… I wouldn’t say it was all about chastity and my support, but it certainly helped. If our relationship, or if she has changed through all of this, it is for the better.

Now it’s on me to become someone better for her.


I like your journey. I might say you are a bit of a role model for me. I don't think we have the same kind of relationships with our wives. Mine is vanilla and not very dom. So an FLR wouldn't really work for us. But the chastity and the submission of our physical pleasure to our wives I believe is pretty similar.

I still don’t think my wife is your typical dom, she’s just starting to understand what I want, mostly because she understands why and how that fits into who I am. We’ve had a lot of time to allow her to grow into who she is in terms of the bedroom.

Don’t worry too much about role models on this one, just think about what’s going to work best in your relationship. Sometimes you need to discover that first, like semen retention sounds like something that’s going to really create the right you… but don’t forget there’s a lot in your relationship that’s good, get the right balance.

I’ve made a lot of mistakes in the run up to this journal.

 

Nobody would read that book…

 

So you’re saying I should add more detail into my answers?

 

93 days to go…

More pointless ramblings: Things I’ve learned so far in the first month:

Ok, these are things that I already knew, so they’re more re-understandings of previous lock ups. It’s nice to write these things out to get my kind clear.

Number 1: Chastity makes my wife happy. Last night as I spooned her and we had a laugh and a joke and she became annoyed that she doesn’t get ‘any dick now that it has been taken away from her!’ The follow up conversation, in which I explained that I think she only wants it more now that she can’t have it gave more clarity on her feelings, “I don’t even want it. I’m only joking when I say that.” She told me. So that’s one thing I can put to the back of my mind, and I didn’t have to press any further before she gave me some re-assurances about the situation “I’m happy like this. I don’t miss the sex as much as I prefer that you don’t pester me for it. I still love that you grope me all the time even though you can’t get anything out of it. It’s you that will get bored of this!”

I replied with the truth, but as I don’t really want to expose myself too much put a spin on it so it came across as a joke, “are you kidding?! This is the best my sex life has ever been!” Before being more serious in telling her that “I’m appreciating the time when we don’t have sex a lot more now too.”

(Don’t worry, not all 72 points are going to be that long…)


Number 2: I feel content being caged. I desperately want to have sex, but have this feeling I’ll regret the full orgasm, or even access to full orgasms as I please.


Number 3: Overall, I feel more happy within myself without the possibility that I can masturbate. It’s good for my self-esteem… even if I waste most of my masturbation time on CM.


Number 4: I don’t miss my penis being touched. In the first few weeks where my wife wasn’t so ready with her wandering hands I thought I did, but I’ve realised It’s not the touch I really need, it’s the interaction. As she has become more forthcoming with her advances I realised it’s just the attention I miss. Having my caged cock licked was super exciting, mostly it’s about watching her do it than the feeling.


Number 5: Reducing my expectations of how often I ‘need’ to pleasure her to just twice a week has let me relax a lot. I enjoy the non-sex time better as a result without the pressure to constantly be sexual motivated. I always thought it was the other way around, that I created pressure for her to perform, I never really considered the weight of what I was expecting from myself.


Number 6: I love spooning. Spooning after long term denial is fucking erotic.


Number 7: 2 weeks is a good length of time between caged orgasm. Any more and I’m overly needed and begin to overwhelm my wife with my needs… we haven’t tried less, but the time up to then is awesome.


Number 8: The caged orgasms I receive during long period of denial have zero impact on my mood. They’re so exciting it almost makes me more positive about being caged and the hormonal effects feel amplified in some way.


Number 9: If I can’t see the attachments or the entry of the dildo I can 100% forget that I am not really having sex whilst using a strapon. I appear to have learned that she loves this too!


Number 10: Giving oral is incredibly satisfying even without getting anything else in return. I’ve always enjoyed it, I’ve always given it and I know I’m fucking good at it… but in our relationship it’s always been one of those situations that she needs to want. Like she’s not fully comfortable in the act, it dwindled. That’s all changed, I don’t know why, but she expects it every time I’m playing with her.


Number 11: 4 weeks is not quite long enough to want to be released, it’s just getting exciting!


Number 12: Grooming my balls whilst caged is nigh on impossible! My body currently looks amazing… my balls are hairy. She will have to get accustomed to that.


12 seems like a good number. It is Christmas after all.

 

Follow up questions? My favourite way to elaborate…

Yes, I do agree that if I was allowed to lead on all fronts I would get bored. I think we all have a predisposition to want ‘more’ than we have.
However, will I get bored in this current situation? No.
That’s not because this is so amazing that I will never want anything more, it’s because my wife has ‘clicked’.
That little term that gets overplayed without real meaning… she has now discovered the true meaning of chastity. The secret to a happy marriage!
It’s not the cage. It’s not the keyholder having everything they want, when they want it. It’s not desperation. It’s not hormones. It’s something so simple that it baffles belief that it isn’t discussed in more detail.

Here’s an example:
“You won’t be using the strapon every time, because if you did, when you get it all the time it will just be ‘Meh’”

So simple. The key to a content, happy chaste life (or not chaste life… maybe we’ll call that ‘living’) is delivering satisfaction in moderation.

When I was given sex 7-10 times a week it became ‘boring’, now I am now dying to really be inside her. I don’t even care that it will only last a few minutes… it will be fucking amazing!

No. I understand where you are coming from, typical erections and stimulation to orgasm is too much. That hurts.
What my wife and I have not tried to do this far is make me ejaculate, not once. As she told me last night, “if you stopped coming all the time I might be able to peg you again.” That’s what she knows works… this is all new discovery.

It’s different in these circumstances. I know full erections still hurt, I still get them from time to time when my body ‘forgets’ I’m in a cage. Mostly at night when my subconscious is wandering. When I’m awake and not attempting to achieve that, it’s like a half flaccid penis just pumping out of necessity. The orgasm is unrelated to that, and probably doesn’t even occur at the same time… honestly, it’s so intense I don’t have a clue what’s happening down there.

In terms of the hormones. I have no idea.
Maybe the non-connected orgasm to ejaculation help.
The thoughts of the night before make me more horny than if I was ever doing something more routine.
Maybe I just have a pre-jac fetish. It’s my life’s calling to never experience anything beyond the faintest of touches.

Whatever it is. I don’t suffer a ‘drop’. In fact, the last time she made me ejaculate I was up early the next morning hoovering and dusting and when she asked why I was honest and told her, “if you can chill all day you might let me go down on you later.”

I think I’m just obsessed with sex with my wife, the more that’s limited, the more I do to get it. A feather duster is the modern day peacock.

 

We looked into the healing time of the piercing and it said around… well it said a long time, so I told my wife 3 months and she decided four.

In her mind that’s how long I need to be locked for continuously for me to have a ‘normal’ sex life again… our normal includes the cage and Emla cream and ruins and all sorts…

As she made that decision it’s something she owns, and therefore, continues.

If she had the choice between my penis and the strapon, she’s probably pick the former. That’s not an option to her, and so it’s off the table and we experiment. Best decision she made to be honest.
Not because I get to fulfil my kinks, but because she is becoming more open to accepting pleasure as pleasure, rather than worrying about how it’s occurring.

 

93 days to go…

Confession time

Ok, so today I had my first shave in a long time. I’m talking full works; my entire body. Before locking up I had taken care of my intimate areas with removal cream but neglected everything else. I really dislike being hairy and there’s something about toning your body and covering it with man hair that’s counter productive. I don’t need to be physically strong or look good for any aspect of my life. I do it purely do it with my own minor narcissistic tendencies in mind. My wife understands this but prefers me to be somewhat manly, yet well cared for. I left hair in the places a man should have it, but trimmed it shorter. The rogue hairs I removed entirely. I looked good!
Honestly, I kinda fancy myself a little.

Flexing in the mirror, I wondered how I would look if I was wearing the harness. How my wife sees me before sex. So thats what I did.

I posed with a strapon dildo.

I don’t actually know what that says about me?

How does something so pointless (wearing a dildo, rather than holding it) have such a high impact?

I am FUCKING weird!!!

 

None! If my wife told me she wants me caged permanently and she’d remove it once or twice a year for sex… I’d go along with that. I’d probably be quite happy. Someone said that chastity is an identity (@Giles_English if your wondering), and as much as I don’t agree in the totalitarianismness of that statement, I do believe being chaste is part of who I am. I prefer myself this way. Being pierced was the only way I could create a solution that was completely out of my control.

How it’s healing is a question! I have no idea. I haven’t seen it this month

 

90 days to go….

It’s all in the hips.


“A week? I don’t think it will be for that long.”

Where did that come from?

Whether my wife would admit it or not, the strapon has definitely changed the perception of chastity and her need for real sex. It may not be exactly the same for her, but it appears adequate in its role of fulfilling her cravings… so thats two things it fills. Hahaha!

It been another week where my wife appears to have really appreciated the side to me that is brought out whilst caged, she’s relaxed into it and described the situation as being pampered (whilst still taking up her role in the household.). It’s safe to say that as we both continue to live within each others boundaries and maintain our focus on what we’ve both expressed as our ‘wants’, it’s all still working rather well: Even if we almost finished the week without an orgasm for either of us!

While she appears to have found greater satisfaction and a contented bliss in this building ‘lifestyle’, as time has passed my satisfaction from caged orgasms seems to dwindle. Initially, it wasn’t necessary, I almost didn’t feel ready before dropping one of my biggest loads of a lifetime through the simple act of rimming.
I was sated for around two weeks before I felt ready again and ejaculated as a side effect of foxing. It just been a week from that moment and I am desperate for it! I haven’t felt this horny in a while, where thoughts of sex even appear within my dreams…

So with that, and a simple massage where my wife had expressed clearly that she wanted no more (and had kept her privates contained within her panties to illustrate her commitment to this), I was expressing my desire to have full-on penetrative sex! Gagging would be the correct term. Something about massaging her whilst she restricts all sexual access that will drive a man to dream, she replied, “Only 3 more months to wait.” before adding to this, “but I don’t really see why I’d bother to be fair.”

3 months and then at least a week of freedom is the understanding I as working under, I told her this, and after so long, it’s what she would want after all; some normality in our sex life…

Apparently not!

A week is too long and as she then put it, “you’ll just return to old habits, you’re not coming out for that long if you can’t promise you won’t masturbate. I’m not letting you out just to have sex if you’re just going to go back to how you were. It’ll be better to just not bother.”


…………


“There really is no point.”

Fuck, things went from bad (for my penis) to worse. As our toddler was ill and she was trapped in the house all day, my wife had spent the day cleaning the kitchen. Top to bottom, clearing each drawer and cupboard before moving onto the next.
By the time I returned from work she had just a little left to complete. To my horror I watched as she wiped the back door, leaving soapy suds all over the window. Surely she knows better than to leave them to set and create marks where a sparkling pane should be… I intervened with the kitchen towel and started buffing away. I think she liked the help, and as I had a both running for her and had promised to finish the floors and my ‘man cupboard’ on my own, she was in high spirits. “I could get used to this.” She said, as she groped me gently through my jeans. Ok, she does this a lot, but not often while she’s kneeling at my feet (from wiping the bottom of the door) and looking directly in my eyes.

“As if, you love that too much.” I laughed.

That’s when she destroyed me…

“No way, I don’t need that at all!” She said flatly. “There really is no point ever letting it out again, it’s better with the strapon and it’s pretty much the same anyway.” She paused for the briefest of moments before continuing. “You bought it to replace yourself and you can cum in your cage now. The strapon just lasts longer than you can anymore.”

I continued wiping the windows, confused, was this my wife? Did she just say that? I don’t think I even responded.

“You really didn’t think things through.” She said, and then she started laughing. I don’t know if it was a menacing cackle or in her own amusement as she pulled my leg…

I do know one thing, there’s a grain of truth in every joke.


…….


And finally, we actually have an opportunity for a little more heated fun. She had specified however, that she didn’t want me to use the strapon this time. Managing my expectations perhaps, maybe a little restriction of the things she allows to retain the contentment within our sex life… maybe, she just wasn’t feeling it.
Whatever her reasoning, I ignored my commitment to her and kept it within the drawer. I have told her that I will just warm it in case she wants to use it… but she was very specific. No dildo.

She turned her naked body over, satisfied with the effort I had given caressing her back and lower, gently I trailed my tongue from her neck to her navel before starting work on her thighs and more intimate areas. As is our standard in our sexual practice, the wand was needed to bring her entirely over to edge. Bringing it into play, my cage pressed against her moist region while I gave her little passionate kiss.

She wasn’t far from climax, yet I got the distinct impression she wanted something more. I think it was in the words she used, “Have you warmed the dildo?”

Honestly, I can’t keep up!

 

Well, you could… but it wouldn’t be entirely accurate.
I don’t know, it’s really hard to explain the complexity of the situation. I’ll try as that’s just me, I love my wife and our relationship and how much work she puts into our life. Even if sometimes she genuinely describes our situation as “I do nothing for you.” Honestly, she said that last night (again) and I replied, “you do more for me by indulging my fantasies than you’ll ever know.”
What’s different now is the balance, I’m also taking a more scrutinuous (that might not be a word) look at our sex-life and ensuring her needs are met too. I’ve had the fantasy, I’ve had the wife that wouldn’t allow orgasm, that played the game really well, but inside I had that inkling of disingenuousness… over time that came to the forefront and she rejected it.

Away from the fantasy, she took my cage in her fingers and stroked it up and down. If she had said something erotic like, “you’ll never get out”, it would be one of those moments a man would dream of… yet she didn’t. What she actually said was, “it’s going to be so long before I get to touch it again.”
When we journey into this life of chastity, we forget what our partners give up (in most cases). My wife loves my cock, she loves making me cum. Yet, she has also learned how much she loves me when I don’t. Also, last night away from my penis, my wife held me close and just stroked my face. She held it. It was the most passionate, non-sexual moment I’ve felt in a long time. I felt it; how much she loved me… and we’d done nothing sexual.

I completely understand her confliction towards chastity. She gets more, whilst giving up so much.

That then in turn has me at, ‘she loves me so much more this way, yet she’s not completely satisfied.’

What a fucking life we live?!

I would happily give up my full orgasms. I’d be pushed to give up any pleasure as such; the ruins, pegging and premature ejaculation have their place. We need a good sex life. All couples do. So when she finds a way that’s satisfying that doesn’t give me the full experience… that’s actually a positive in our relationship.

We now have two methods in our situation: foxing that brings me to orgasm and pegging which brings us both to orgasm.

It all helps. Now I get what I want: denial. She gets what she wants(ish): full on sex that brings me to climax.
If she accepts the positive in this way; that she doesn’t have to waddle to the toilet holding my cum inside her and my constant horn driven mood towards her… we could have something great.

When she accepts that. That’s the time to say “be careful why you wish for”!

P.s. watching her waddle away full of cum was my favourite in our relationship. Denial is tough both ways!

 

88 days to go…

The drunken elephant in the room

Being as intoxicated as I was last night, I was a little liberal with the talk about my caged penis, how much I like her, and all the things I have enjoyed etc.

Usually my wife would be rather unenamoured with this, but in the haze of my memory I still remember her being quite forthcoming with her own conversation on the subject. In fact I remember one very fine detail that will stick with me: She admitted to enjoying the whole new dildo thing we have going on.

I wish I could remember more.

One more flash point, as I was walking past her, swinging my cage in her face… you know, as that’s what adults do. She grabbed behind my legs and gave me a couple of deliciously long and full on licks to my balls. That was nice.

Yet, this moment had my intoxicated mind wandering, and my uncontrollable tongue; that knows not when to shut up, decided it was a good time to bring up my concerns of the future.

Being out of control of her decision isn’t too difficult, not knowing what her decision will be is torture!

Drunken me needed to express my concerns, “I’m a little worried about how I’m going to be when I have an orgasm again, or at least too many orgasms.”

“What do you mean?” She pressed.

“We both know I’m a complete dick when I’m not caged.” I said jokingly.

“I think it’s clear you’ll be wanking as soon as you’re able to, so I think you’ll just be out for sex and straight back in again.”

I gave a sign of agreement before continuing to leave the room. Walking around naked is commonplace during consumption. She hadn’t finished what she was saying however, “maybe that’ll be twice a year or so.”

A little smile told me she was only joking with the frequency… but I feel more at ease knowing I verbalised my concerns. She now at least knows a little more to work with when she decides how this will all play out.