How much is reality or fantasy?

For all the time that goes by where there is no attention from your kh verbally or physically does anyone regret or wish they had not suggested the idea? Does the fantasy become mundane but your partner loves it because it ticks boxes their boxes for different reasons?

 

It is very real for us. I'm sure my Mistress would be happy to discuss it with her.

 

Hi, yes she is very happy. I think if you're in a loving relationship, your partner can see what's best for you and will be willing to work with you to realise your needs and, if they can, accommodate your preferences. For me it works because my Mistress isn't 'in charge' in our everyday life -- for all the vanilla stuff, I remain an alpha and make most of our life choices. It's when it comes to sexual things, that's when her underlying control manifests itself.

Like another poster has said, I'm sure my Mistress would be happy to speak to your wife ...

 

My blog /Journey on here is genuine and very much real. There's not much to it at the moment but we are only 6 weeks in and It's probably not that exciting to many of you, also Im certainly not a writer but that's not why I do it. I like to read it back to myself to see how far we have come. Obviously I only log the interesting bits and most of the time not much interesting is going on as we are busy with other aspects of life or I'm just doing chores. She doesn't yet know about CM and I've also been debating in my head if she is ready or up for it. I wouldn't have believed it myself on reading some of my updates and they are not as extreme or exciting as others. 90%of the time though we live a fairly normal vanilla looking family life other than what she has locked around my cock. I'm certainly not dragged around by a leash and it's not ever the main topic of conversation. That said it looks like Chastity is here to stay as she likes the change she has seen in me and I think we have progressed passed the innitial stages.

 

Years ago, Mrs Edge poked around a bit at some different sites, but was pretty turned off. The sissy, cuck, humiliation thing horrified her, and she was worried that it was what I wanted. She doesn't consider herself to be kinky, or dominant - she just enjoys having me locked up. Very tame.

That said, we do play for long terms, and always have. Weeks, months, and now, years long lockups are what we do. Not much else, we're pretty vanilla otherwise.

So, tell your wife that some of it is fantasy, some is embellished, and some is just folks trying to keep the sparks going after a lot of years together.

 

I'm sure a lot do
which leaves it up to you to show her what could be in it for her
She gets home from work knackered... show her how much you can do for her so she does not feel as knackered when bed-time comes around. and of course show her that no strings attached you pleasuring her can at times be preferable to her self-pleasuring.

You want to get her interested then you have to provide her with a motive or multiple motives to be interested.

And of course neither of you has to be interested in anything other than she being your KH.. as the dynamic evolves some thigs may or may ot change. What some might call wierd the Cuckold sissyfication crossdressing etc ll combine to make most noise on this site but they are by no means what this site is all about.

 

As I think others have said, I've never posted anything untrue here, but it is certainly the case that someone could get a wrong impression based on even those things that I have said that are true. The reality is that my wife and I are in our mid-40s and have kids and pets, and we both have full-time jobs, and the majority of our evenings are quite vanilla with both of us sitting on the couch watching TV until she dozes off.

Chastity is a really keen way to inject some kink into our daily lives though. My wife truly loves having me locked, and it's really the case that she only touches my penis when I am locked, and she does so quite frequently to tease me. She gets off on it. When I am in chastity we are both more a lot more horny than when I am not. However, it's not always enough to rise above all the other distractions in our lives, and we rarely find ourselves with time, opportunity, and motivation to do some of the fun and kinky things I or we would like to. For example, she loves to give my ass a good beating, and I would be quite willing to submit to her natural sadism any and every time she wanted, but it has been several weeks since the last time we found ourselves in time and place for that to happen.

And then there can be just the most amazing experiences ever. Just this weekend she indulged me in one of my biggest until then unfulfilled fantasies, and she urinated on me and even allowed me to taste it a little! Later that day we went to see Hustlers, a new movie about strippers and with seemingly constant female nudity. She teased me and tapped my cage and laughed at my frustration, and later that night she rode my face to two orgasms. And she did so with an enthusiasm unlike I have usually seen from her, grinding and writhing on my face and nearly suffocating me. It was amazing! The very next morning she talked about cuckolding me (another huge fantasy of mine) and pushed way beyond her own previous limits in telling me just how badly she really wanted a real man inside her. This as she was directing me to fluff her huge dildo and then to give her two more earth shattering orgasms with the monster cock.

Anyway, back down to earth... My point is that there can be moments like this weekend and our anniversary weekend over a month ago that seem like they are straight out of fantasy. And then in between I am lucky to just to have her tease me a little while she orders me to rub her back or feet after a long day. But, overall, the whole experience is simply wonderful.

 

Fantasy? We don't need no stinkin' fantasy!

100% pure permanent reality.

The big 0. Its a number, not a letter.

(You either get it or you don't. Do the math.)

 

I agree that many of us don't often refer to our everyday interactions outside chastity, but there it is undoubtly where most of our time elapses.
In our case ,after several unsuccessful attempts,I finally got exactly what I wanted: being caged .
Our arrangement is peculiar because my KH/Wife has outsourced all the teasing,torments,discipline,etc. to a masseuse and a ProDomme.Time with these ladies is two times / two hours per week with the first and three hours once a month with the second.
My KH/ Wife ,without putting too much effort amuses herself verbally teasing me,and every now and then playing with my cage for a few minutes.
And that's it! Chastity play time is minimal,but keeps things running !
Me, horny,frustrated,.....happy!
My Wife enjoying all the benefits of a devoted submissive.....happy!
The rest of the time we act "normal", vanilla,as if chastity didn't exist!lol

 

Several: HTv3, HTv3 knock-off, Amicus, too large metal cage from Amazon, reasonable sized crappy metal Chinese cage, Cherry Keeper.

The HTv3 knock-off actually seems to fit the best, but my wife doesn't like the closed design and it is hard to keep clean. The Amicus is great, well designed, and attractive, but my left testicle always eventually manages to retract somehow, and I don't think I can go with a smaller base ring (this one fits correctly in that I can, just barely get a single finger underneath it a bit). This cage has twice just fallen off unexpectedly, which almost made things awkward at dinner with the kids one night.

The Cherry Keeper is light enough that it doesn't seem to likely fall off (and the ring is just a tad smaller), but I get substantial chafing after several hours. I tried sanding the base ring down some to smooth it out, and will try wearing it soon, but I suspect it's a little too small for long term wear.

It's a bummer, because I'd like to try wearing a cage 24/7, but the longest I've managed without testicular escape or a chafing sore is 3 days.

 

Is it real? Is it fantasy?

When she snaps the lock shut, when she binds my wrists and disciplines me, when she teases me to the point of tears, when she wants to be pleasured frequently, when she says “no.” Which one? Real or fantasy?

She was very vanilla. Although denial was her suggestion, chastity was not her fantasy — yet it sure feels like reality to me. She genuinely likes control. And, she is taking more.

I’m pretty sure she isn’t doing it for my benefit anymore, if ever.

 

Is it real? Is it fantasy?

When she snaps the lock shut, when she binds my wrists and disciplines me, when she teases me to the point of tears, when she wants to be pleasured frequently, when she says “no.” Which one? Real or fantasy?

She was very vanilla. Although denial was her suggestion, chastity was not her fantasy — yet it sure feels like reality to me. She genuinely likes control. And, she is taking more.

I’m pretty sure she isn’t doing it for my benefit anymore, if ever.

 

The reality is that my penis -- our penis now, really, since I don't get to use it sexually without her anymore -- is locked 24/7. Real life -- work, grocery shopping, cycling, laundry, making her coffee, eating and doing dishes -- goes on, that's reality. Less than 5% of any given day involves teasing, talking about chastity, or licking her. Those moments feel like living my fantasy, but they're real too. My wife is living her life; my chastity is not in the forefront of her mind 95% of the time, that's my reality.

 

It's a beautiful thing when a couple accepts and satisfies each other.

 

It has taken a lot of hard work and committment by both of us, which continues.

We each have had to accept that we both want more from the other than the other can give. That's what makes it reality not fantasy. It"s not easy.

 

Just one more thought...

I think it is not uncommon for partners starting out with chastity, FLR, and Femdom, to begin with one partner’s fantasy. Later, as the fantasy is accepted and matures, it becomes a shared reality and incorporated into every day life.

It seems to be the common pattern of many posts here.

 

What a wonderful realisation!
The fantasy drives us, but true contentment is being happy with the reality.

 

Sounds perfect!