Cheating in Chastity? What are the appropriate consequences?

We know little about your or your KH ot your relationship and its dynamic.
Maybe she thinks of it as being as bad a thing as you havving an affair
or
maybe she is just not bothered... only you know.

What is the worst thing you think she could / would do ... I'm not talking pouring a freshly brewed coffee over your genitals but something sane.. Like her stopping playing the game altogether if you can't keep to the rules.. or maybe she just throws the keys away
Your Lady, your relationship your dynamic. Think about it and what you want out of TTTWD

 

I’m not even allowed to touch the outside of my cage once it’s locked without a spanking

 

Early on she said she would hand me the key back if she found that I was doing something sly. Later she changed her mind and said I would be locked for at least a year before she would think of taking it off again.

Things change

 

I did this at first and nearly lost everything. If you think about it cheating or causing yourself to have an orgasm without your wife's consent is probably the worse thing you could do apart from actual penetrative sex with another woman. You just can't do it. I don't know about punishment we have never gone in much for that but if punishment is part of your FLR marriage then it needs to be the most hard ever. I am not locked at the moment and I am alone till tomorrow, my cock is hard and I have not orgasmed for 41 days. I would love to shoot my load It would take seconds if I started but I will remain faithful I will not cheat. My love for my wife is the most important thing. More important than an orgasm.

 

For me, deliberate cheating is almost as bad as an affair. God only knows who or what he was thinking about when he orgasmed. And the attitude afterwards is intolerable. It's totally unacceptable and breaks all trust. If he had an affair one time, I'm out. This includes emotional affairs. If he deliberately cheats, 3 times, I'm out. The punishments would not be sexy in any way, and they would be severe. Total misery. I don't care if we've been together for 50 years and I've invested a lot of time. I'm immune to sunk cost fallacy. There is NO excuse for deliberate cheating.

 

I love that you have developed this level of self-control and have become such a trustworthy and devoted partner. It's far more difficult being uncaged, and takes mastery. It shows how much you love and respect your wife, how strong you are willing to be for her, and that is really, really hot.

An ex of many years was a cuckold, and although we did not practice physical chastity, he ALWAYS waited for my command to release, no matter how impatient he would get, and it meant the world to me. There were days he paced around the house like a caged tiger and he didn't know why he did it, but I did. Still turns me on to think about it. God and he had a ginormous, beautiful cock. I'm glad it wasn't caged but so well tamed, so I could look at it as often as I liked, and then do nothing else with it. I demanded he show it to me quite a bit, usually at the most inconvenient and awkward times, too. It would perk up hopefully every time but of course I was usually just teasing. These frequent reminders made it a lot worse for him He complained bitterly of blue balls but I didn't worry about it. The release was always worth it! And of course I would force him to prolong sex when he was already so desperate. He was never allowed to cum until I ordered it. If he accidentally spilled I'd always ruin it, which he HATED so he quickly learned to last a very long time for me.

I absolutely adore a man who can practice mental / emotional chastity. Guys, being unwaveringly strong for your partner where other men are weak, whatever it takes... it's incredibly sexy to us.

 

Wonderful post Queenofsword. Please don't think I have this totally down I could slip up I know I could. I can't wait for her to get home even though I have care workers visit it's been a long weekend. I have spent a lot of time on here to be honest. I think a man who is committed to FLR and orgasm control has to look upon having an unscheduled orgasm as being deeply unfaithful as if you were committing adultery. It's the way I look at it these days.

 

Madams rules are simple, it’s all or nothing, if I was to cheat, she would simply give me my key back, and it would be over. But given that I am only ever uncaged once a week for a few mins to wash and clean my self, I don’t have the chance to think about it.

 

@QueenOfSwords

" If he accidentally spilled I'd always ruin it, ...."

How?

 

depends entirely on the dynamic of the relationship.

Is it one of funishments? Or physical punishment? Or mental punishment? Or total anger and a withdrawal of all privileges? Or separation? All are appropriate in the right context.

 

One of my past partners and I used to make for hours during the times we had the opportunity. As often as not she would take my cage off ad during those times we would do what couples usually do and some they don't but it would rarely not end up with me being relocked and not having had orgasm.

That did make us both feel great ..her about level of control and me for my self control. It would also have the effect of me feeling drained because of the loss of pre-cum and yet completely charged and ready to go again.

Just imagine having had sex all weekend like you were afraid it might be the last time and then going home hornier than you were when you got there.

We did not need the cage but we both preferred the feelings me wearing it gave.

 

The one time I cheated, that is I knew where the key was so I took it, unlocked, rubbed one out, re-locked and confessed my sin, she put me in my backup cage for a week. I don't like the backup cage - it is a closed design and can get messy and smelly. It was an effective punishment.

 

Technically I made him ruin it. He hated when I was so visibly disappointed when he came before I had (I only date pleasers). So he learned to pull out right before, and I'd bark at him, "Don't touch it!" A few seconds later, a little bit of cum would slowly spill out and he would grunt with excrutiation. Turned me on so much to watch him struggle. Usually he came bucket loads with tremendous force for me, so unlike a lot of guys, he didn't enjoy ruined orgasms on any level whatsoever. He was so strong for me.

 

Lol! "A lot of guys". No, most guys aren't into ruined orgasms at all. I meant to say, "a lot of guys who practice it". I've noticed that most guys who practice it do get a kick out of it. Some might even in lieu of a kick in the balls.

 

I think I can honestly say for myself and most guys that practising ruined orgasms or even completely retained orgasms would be by far much better than a kick in the balls.

 

I have been in mental chastity for 18 months and in that time I have only had 1 slip where I groped myself in the morning while half asleep and confessed this to my Owner who has decided to no lock me when she goes out just to remind me who's it is.

I'm honestly so ashamed of myself as I know I can do better and being half asleep is no excuse.

 

It is difficult not to touch when not caged it takes incredible will power. Our woman know that and love the effort we put in on their behalf.

 

HAHAHA filltee! I know, right? I would agree with you but the male mind is a wild animal. Some lurkers here would have a hard time deciding between the two.

 

This is rather easy: Either someone wants to be locked and chaste or they don't.

Find them cheating one time and that's the end of it.

 

OH MY GOD, YESSSSSSSSSSSSS! Jesus.

I can say from personal experience though, the guys who are really into the kink and not the lifestyle will do just about anything, in the beginning, to pretend they are serious. Very convincing and very eager too. They will say all the things you've ever wanted to hear. But the second She tries to lock him up for an extended period that he didn't have in mind, he WILL cheat. Because ultimately it's just a basic itch he needs scratched on a semi-regular basis, while he remains in control.

I will go even further to say, these guys don't have a submissive bone in their bodies. That kind of behaviour is just using women to get their kicks. Nothing has changed in them, except a deeper porn habit.

 

Agree 100%.