When did you pass the point of no return?

Not really… don’t get me wrong, we both enjoy how things are working, but it isn’t a make or break to keep things going.

 

Regardless of everything a mutual respect is required, to not have control is to me extremely erotic, however if there was a point where I want to get out and she doesn't want to let me, we might have a problem or it could be even more exciting who knows.
Either way male sure you're happy.

 

I’m in a fairly new relationship. My so was aware of my chastity and accepted it right away. She likes the idea of holding the key and has instructed me to wear my cage.
She is also starting to feminize me to a minor extent for play.
I find that exciting.

to that extent, we also have a belt for her so we can take turns in the Dominant role.

 

We have it came to that point, no going back. It’s happened slowly. I gave my Queen the keys to my belt in April and told her to use them as she saw fit. I have been out of the belt twice sense. We where talking the other night and I ask if it was permanent. She said yes. We do have a trip out country coming up and we have not decided how to handle the belt during that time. As much as I hate trapped ball cages I may be in one that week. Or, maybe she will let me be free for a week… I have not be free for more than 12 hrs in 7 months.

 

A while ago my wife and I were discussing things and I remarked how when we started there was an understanding if I wanted a break from chastity it would be granted. She told me it has gone from a fun kink to a lifestyle and it now won’t stop unless she decides it does, or I use our safe word which would probably prevent her from ever going back again. In that moment I knew this was my life for the foreseeable future.

 

After about 48 hours. She past the point of no return after about a year

 

For me, I think I reached that point about 2 months ago when I realized my brain was permanently wired to want to masturbate and/or orgasm when it would be best not to. I realized our new dynamic was too tempting to be able to resist an orgasm in the heat of physical intimacy. I also realized that erections in the first 24 hours after a release and orgasm were also mentally challenging & excruciatingly difficult to resist. I I occasionally have moments when I'm sexually aroused and the urge to grip my penis and masturbate is very, very strong.

For my wife, I think she still believes there is a place somewhere down the road when I should be able to go without the cage and be strong enough mentally to resist.

I just can't see ever having the desire to try to resist without chastity because it's an easy barrier to unwanted behavior and it's a hurdle high enough that I can easily resist.

• Slipping up and cheating would be very disappointing to my wife and damaging to her trust in me; I'm sure there would be some permanent damage to our relationship.
• We have a contract that requires me to admit my unwanted behavior to a close friend / mentor and that would be very embarrassing; going without a device would put me at great risk of having to make that admission.
• Slipping up, cheating, and trying to hide it would be damaging to our relationship in different ways. We've been there and I don't want to live like that again.

 

Back when I came up with this hair-brained scheme I thought it was brilliant.
She was like, why would I want this?
I gave her all the beneficial reasons for her, my real reasons were probably more selfish than not though.
Turns out the benefits for her were real.
It didn’t take long before she decided I should always be locked unless she wants to use my cock.
Most of the time that isn’t necessary as she is pretty happy getting off with toys and oral.
Lately it’s a lot of dry humping the cage until she comes.
She says she can get off on pretty much anything and doesn’t need to unlock often.
She doesn’t want to go back.
If I really argued it, she would, and it wouldn’t end our relationship.
But it wouldn’t go back to how it was.
She would never let me use her pussy the way I used to. And there would be less sex and intimacy than ever.
It would really be awful. I can imagine.
So this is it.
I wanted to give her control of my orgasms and erections and now I can’t get them back without ruining the bliss we’ve created in the past 8-9 months.
I wouldn’t want to go back either.
But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t occasionally miss railing her because i woke up with morning wood, or even just rubbing one out here and there.

 

When I got my first custom built cage that fitted well. From that day the journey into the rabbit hole started.

 

We started our relationship as an FLR right from the beginning. We started really slow, but in regard of all the changes that came with time it is really hard to imagine changing to a complete vanilla relationship.
However we already did so for a couple of weaks already, because we ran into a problem we could not solve from within the FLR - at least not in a good way.

That said I think it very unlikely to turn our relationship into vanilla one at any point. But we both tend have a very grounded approach towards the kind of our relationship, our sexlife and our kinks. So even if it might be unlikely to have a complete change, Smaller changes of certain aspects would be more likely should some real problems occur.

Should I get some real problem with something (unlikely) and she would not acknowledge it and / or offer some reasonable solution (even more unlikely) I might start to question her and our relationship. That said there is a reason why we married each other ...

 

There's been a number of "points of no return" on our journey...
When she suggested that I buy a custom built cage.
When lockups became regularly longer than unlocks.
When I promised to never ask her to be unlocked for sex.
When she told me that I wanted to "break the record".

 

As others the “getting a custom cage” was certainly a milestone, and while she’s in “in to it” with me for nearly 10 years now, the real point of no return (at least in my mind) was when she had me pierced - that was very real, and if the cage is on it won’t come off without some serious power tool work that I’d never want to do that close to sensitive bits.

 

it was after getting a high end K3D, and seeing that I can wear it comfortably without end first. Then after about 1.5 years of chastity play, its become an expectation that I'm locked unless she says otherwise. Specifically, after a trip together with family that she let me unlock for (we were together the whole time) she asked urgency if I had locked back up yet, and why not, and how she could be sure I wasn't masturbating or doing anything behind her back.

When that happened it dawned on me that she loves the sense of trust and security so much that I'm not sure if this will ever change. Be careful what you wish for is right... I'm now thinking through if this will ever change and I can't honestly see us going back. It's a part of our relationship now.

On the other hand... the other point of no return is realizing that I also don't want to go back. When I'm not caged I actually find myself missing it. It feels more right being locked than unlocked now. The thought of jacking off to porn solo, or having any sexual experience with out her just isn't as good as what this has given us.

Our relationship is better this way. I love the kinky secret. I love it as a very physical real symbol of my commitment to her, and to each other. I guess we're locked for life together.

 

I don't think I have reached the point of no return. My wife has acknowledge that she sees many benefits but she still fears for the king term effects of harm of the cage. I also have not fully come to terms with wanting it full time even though I too see the positives. I suspect that I've she is comfortable that there are no long term negative effects on my health or happiness that it will be a point of no return.

 

I am intrigued how it would be taken I put this to my wife, if I wanted a break, would she be accommodating?
I think we are past the point of no return. Her words are that I’m a better husband… so if I was to stop she would probably be pretty pissed with my selfishness on that front.
Don’t know when she first told me that. It was pretty early. I’ve heard it a fair few times since. That’s kinda when I knew we wouldn’t be going back… how far forward is my real concern

 

I think I am past the point of no return myself, in that I don't want to go back. My wife, on the other hand, really appreciates the benefits and improvements, but I think if I were to say that I am done with it, while she would be disappointed, I don't think she'd try to stop me. At least not yet, but she may get there.

 

Day 2 definitely day 2.

 

I think it may have been the day before that, actually. But at this point, who's counting, right?

 

We have breaks from chastity every now and then. I usually ask to be locked up.

Now I think my partner would be disappointed if i asked out of it, but it would not be the end.

I think best to say she prefers me locked but its not a condition.

 

It's not any fun if I have no choice and have had a couple abusive KH'ers, so past the point of no return means it's boring for me and I'm done then

 

I’ve been playing around with chastity for a few years but the point of ho return came this year, I decided to visit a pro dominatrix and we got on well, I am now her property and recently I was told to put my chastity on and give her the key, I have one as a back up and for when I travel through airports but I've been locked for a few months now, penetration is in my behind now only.

I love it.

 

I think we reached the point of no return last night when I had him pierced.

I love the control. We’ve been using chastity for almost 2 years—sometimes we’re more serious than others. But I tell him to try and pull out and masturbate in every device we buy, which he always can. So when I tell him to lock up, it’s his willpower and self control that are causing his obedience. I may as well just leave the keys on the counter and ask him nicely not to use them.

I think chastity may have saved our marriage, because it turned a point of resentment, (lack of sex) into a feature of our relationship. And if we were to quit now, I think we’d fall back into a cycle of resentment and anger.

 

We had several such points (on my side), it seems to me, there were several.. each of them had a period of frustration and a desire to end it.. while my wife, after each such event, reacted more and more calmly and was more and more sure that I will want to go back to this path myself - now we don't even talk about it anymore - my position towards her is obvious and a foregone conclusion.. we are best friends and we live as partners, of course, apart from sex life. Thanks to the ban on orgasm, my behavior towards her has changed and we both see that we live better together.. I am happy that she is fulfilled - she sees that I adore her, she has sexual freedom and as a bonus, she has complete control over my sexuality.. and the moment where she realized it was probably the most important point of no return, and then I was the only one who had to deal with it. She sees me completely differently - we worked for it for years and she said many times that she couldn't imagine me in a different role..

 

Several times.

When she bought a BAW piercing attached caged, and all the crappy plastic ones were thrown out.

When she said she really liked locking my cock away and denying erections and orgasms.

When she said she wanted, and ordered, a smaller BAW cage.

After doing 4 continuous months locked, and her saying she wants to do it properly next time, 6 months, but probably 9, but really no end date.

Her telling me she doesn't mind if my cock shrinks a little (It can be a bit much for her sometimes), that if I don't see or touch my cock then it shouldn't bother me either.

There are many more times where I have realised "There is no going back now" since we both really enjoy the experience in our own ways.