What are men getting from it?

Another brilliant distillation from @Wonderwomanssub . This is what I was trying to convey about my own feelings above.

 

I wouldn’t say we live a true or total FLR lifestyle. It’s really just confined to the bedroom. What I get out of it besides a better sex life is reduction in stress. I’ve never felt that I have a talent for leadership nor do I enjoy decision making. As the designated leader of our home (by my wife’s demand) I like having an area of my life where I don’t have to be under pressure to make decisions and be in control.

 

I've never fit into what I'd call a traditional sex life, or relationships. I've been married for 26 years, and in addition to my wife, I have a keyholder who is one of our best friends. Through it all, I've been able to explore different aspects of myself, and learn about different ways of expressing intimacy, outside of the traditional vanilla norms.

 

In my experience, the biggest benefit from chastity or an FLR is the continual "almost high" that you get from being denied.

The way that the different male hormones fluctuate is complicated, you don't need to know how it works in detail, just that if a male goes without orgasm, then their level of "feeling good" rises to a point that isn't quite at orgasm level, but it stays there for long periods.
When you orgasm, then different hormones take over and you feel 'down', for different people, and for the same person at different times, the down can have different lengths, from hours to weeks.
For the men who have discovered denial, the very brief high of an occasional orgasm is no substitute for the continual "almost nearly high" of denial. A few men can resist the urge to have an orgasm, hence the honour system, the majority need help, hence chastity and FLR.

For more detail on how the male hormones interact to produce the feelings that they do, a good writeup here: https://www.reuniting.info/node/4865

 

Good question, and i will take time to think about it. but instinctively i would say, fulfillment, achievement, having a purpose that is fitting my deep genuine nature. it has nothing to do about sexuality - the most i can expect for the rest of my life is very occasional milking. it is a lot to give my life to Her in servitude and devotion, but i am receiving a lot in return. She is controlling everything, food, health, exercises, what i read, what skills i am working on etc... shaping me to be totally Hers, but also making of me a better gentleman, employee and boss in the professional life

 

My thanks to Ms. Amanda for starting this thread, and to the many responders - great reading. Like Bertha, my situation with my Lady is one where she is definitely calling the shots. It was a recent transition, from 'am I dominating you right?' to 'Here's how it's going to be'. Aspects of that are a little scary for me, like imagining long term periods of no orgasms for me, but I feel very fulfilled, safe, and happy to be serving my Lady. Pleasing her (sexually but also all other ways) gives me such joy and pleasure. Echoing some others I have said I'd like more kink, but all of a sudden that seems to have caught fire, too. New life, happy wife, happy me!

 

sorry i realized i did i wrong up there..so here again my reply

this is a great question.
i feel, extreemly close to my girlfriend when she puts me in the cage. i feel proud to be her boy. it is a compleatly different way of proudness, its hard to explain. waking up next to her in the morning, going downstairs to make coffee for her, then bring it to the bed, feels different in castidy, even its the same act.
its not even about sexuality, its for me this being proud to be kept in the irons, and i do it for her.
the cage makes me not to a better men, it makes me a proud men.

 

Not related to chastity but runs parallel to it. I grew up in a very paternalistic family, with the women also enforcing it's view. There is obviously nothing wrong with it, but we also know the other issues with it.

So after years of dealing with really bad things, it came to me that I needed to empower my inner feminine warrior spirit and the only way to do so was to become a feminist. I needed to balance things out.

For some guys chastity and service through submission does the same thing. My partner hates with a capital H ... chastity and any views of a less than a dominant man. It turns her off, so I respect that 100%. So I had to look to alternative ways to process this (feminism did it for me), chastity and FLR does it for others.

I am a natural switch so I am very happy being the daddy and putting my partner through the paces, and the fact I also have a submissive part to me, means I know how to really take it there ....

I wish my partner could see the same view, but I am not going to micromanage her sexuality as that is wrong ....