I am getting married with a lovely girl later this year. She’s a bit older and naturally more dominant. We’ve played on and off with a FLR and chastity periods up to 2 months. During chastity she prefers me being caged all the time and without orgasm during the timeframes we set in advance. That literally means even cleaning and shaving without taking the cage off, but it is possible with the titanium PA cage I have. We decided a while ago our next chastity challenge to break our record with the goal of 3 months. The idea is to start in 2 days and finish shortly before our holiday. However, as we where talking about the fact that I got lazy on my business, she changed her mind into another challenge. Basically she pointed out a profit target for the end of the year which is about 70% more then I am doing now (looking at my monthly profits). Until then no orgasms or taking off the cage (no end date, could run into next year). Her idea is that she believes in me and that I could fix this number before the end of the year. What I know for sure is that I won’t be able to do it shortly as a lot of my time goes to one customer who basically hires me full time for work I cannot delegate. At one point it sounds exciting as we surely will have a very kinky lifestyle together. My concern is that it backfires (bored, less happy with the arrangement/motivated) and she is less likely to break our agreement (or it will be a fail and affecting future challenges where she is less motivated to participated in those kinks). I acknowledge that I have gotten lazy in the last years, but as I invested my earlier income into another business we run together, I need more money to secure my first business and the salaries I have to pay. Important to mention that I am just in my 30s. What do you guys think? Should I go 100% in or discuss to somehow break it into smaller steps?
Well, sounds like she’s not only older than you… but also smarter. You have one client that is preventing you from potentially increasing your profits by 70%. You haven’t dropped that client. You haven’t trained your colleagues to fulfil this role. Take the cage, do as she says and get rich!
You made a fair point. I must say that I am slowly transitioning from freelancing and just have one employee at the moment (who’s doing the actual work we want to keep doing, not a client specific complex project as I currently do). But yes, if I can increase customer base dropping that client is eventually the goal.
It's very American to have a fetish about money and success. In the UK bdsm tends to be a respite from these things.
Hmm. I have a different opinion. Sure, it sounds enticing, and maybe there's some self doubt showing through, but, it's stressful enough running a business without adding this. There's also many things outside of your control. I'd try to keep chastity a bit more fun. Regardless, hope your profits go up.
I don’t really have a fetish about making money, but the business we run together burned all my savings in the first two years. It’s doing OK now but I learned that hard way how stressful lack of funds can be (when having employees to pay salaries). While I agree that BDSM helps me too to relax my mind; at the most stressful times we weren’t into kink at all. As European I agree with you; just to clarify .
It’s what I have been thinking too last night. I’ve discussed to keep the old plan of 3 months and then find a more exciting way to incorporate kink for motivation growing my own business. Playing with the idea of being rewarded with an orgasm for every new customer I bring in as I am doing the sales for my remote business. Might make it more fun to do sales as I don’t really like it that much.
I am a business owner, and my wife has always locked me for very long terms. Allow me to give you my perspective. The idea of having a goal to shoot for is fun, and if orgasms drive you, then easily achievable goals can be fun. Weight loss, miles walked, learning a skill, etc. Rewards for shot term goals can be fun. What is short term? I don't know, but my gut tells me that three months is about the limit. I can get into the psychology of why, but let's leave that for a month. A year is seriously long term. It *might* work if this were some kind of goal such as losing 25kg, or deadlifting twice your body weight, but those are goals over which you have a lot of control. Business goals are stressful, especially when you need to depend upon employees, suppliers, regulations, and so many other factors that can not be controlled. Your sex life - indeed, your relationship - should be respite from the pressures of work. Then, there's the idea that you could put in a lot of locked time for what? One orgasm? After a few months, you may find that you're having orgasms in your cage. How is an unlocked orgasm more of a motivator? Don't get me wrong; I'm actually now locked permanently, but that's an aspect of our marriage that is fun and exciting. I'd really hate to mix my sexual pleasure with how well business is doing.
Yes, I will add to the growing consensus here that mixing business and pleasure rarely ends well. I know I would not want my chastity journey in any way caught up in important life/business decisions. "Kink" should be more of an escape from everyday stress, not something that adds to it. Good luck with your decisions and business....
Do it. You only live once. If you can make it past 3 months of lockdown you should be good. Just have an out if things get so bad that it negetively affects your relationship and/or income. Personally, I would commit to the first three months to see how things are going. Then have a sober conversation and let her decide whether to keep going. A year is more than I would do, but it sounds like a wild time. Also, as a business owner/entrepreneur, you just gotta motivate yourself, really.
Lot's of great advice all. Really appreciate it. Looking at it now I agree it's not the best decision to mix business goals with kink. But her idea came from a good heart as I know she wants to support me with my goals by adding more kink into our life (in an attempt to make me less lazy, but she loves it too). Last time when she discussed the potential year of chastity she asked me a couple times but this is what you want right? I remember that over the past years I dropped it as fantasy a couple of times (hinted on it when we're older, but honestly also not to scare her off as we are just a couple years together and she never heard about chastity before). We know that I am not that submissive when we are not playing with chastity (cage and denial). So we are kind of switching between periods of a FLR (during chastity) and more vanilla sex life (with basically no kink those times). But somehow we have lots more sex when I am in chastity . As we have already decided on 3 months, it will be a great test if the extra kink/playtime/sex and having a 24/7 FLR actually makes me more productive and both of us happy. One week before the end we will evaluate if we both want to continue or make a hard stop after the 3 months. Might also start to feel boring (which is the reason why she currently likes to switch every couple months or so).
Business and pleasure normally don't mix well and can be a tightrope. I worked part time for my wife while having my full time job and extra time on the regular job had me missing some commitments I made to her. She was not at all pleased and while she did understand, it did have behind the scenes repercussions. We were into BDSM and chastity at the same time and some extra hits with the flogger or a week delay for release were her way of getting even. She did come to her senses and realized she had put me in this position and because my work was actually benefiting her bottom line accepted some missed deliverable dates. I would go in smaller steps and set mutually agreeable commitments you both can achieve. As far as lock-up commitments, go slower because 9 months is longer than you can imagine. I once went 120 days without release, milking, or any release and I was beside myself. Some people will say you get use to it, I never did and when finally release was not sure I would ever do chastity again. We came to an understanding and set realistic goals and have committed to them. We did a follow up with 100 days locked without the cage coming off, but my wife found ways to make it interesting and provided me relief with a milking here and there and a vibrator orgasm.
What's the very worst that could happen? As a business owner, you are already weighing the risks of your decisions, and this is no different. Are the costs worth the benefits?
The idea of mixing money and chastity is off putting to me personally but I have always been intrigued by the idea of having to be caged until I have completed a certain of physical fitness or weight loss to earn an O.