Professional Key Holding

It would be nice if we could develop a trusted Keyholder network. I am lucky in that my Wife is my Keyholder, but I know if I was a single guy I would definitely want some way other than a kitchen safe to be used to look after my keys. Having a Keyholder, even a professional one, would help a lot.

A trusted Keyholder network would give people the confidence they need to know they weren't going to be put at risk or ripped off. Personally I would rather do this with someone who was a KH for the fun and control it offered rather than for payment, but even if you pay you want to know you are going to get your moneys worth.

The how of this I have no idea!

 

A keyholder would be good for me as having had trouble fitting devices being locked out of things like Kitchen Safes has been a far to frequent occurrence. Often losing the ability to 'play' until the timer unlocks. A real keyholder would ironically make it easier to stick to things like plastic locks as they could be there to verify that the same one is being used. However... There is nothing quite like the feel of a lock being snapped on so that a little more effort than a pair is going to be needed to get the thing off. (That and you could talk to them, should, like me, you have problems with the device and it needs refitting and/or has fallen off. I even posted in Lost and Found the other day re this kind of thing with a slightly unusual suggestion of locking me up but not getting the key.

As to "Professional" key holding that probably has no place in Lost and Found although I would suggest you could start a separate mini-thread for those who want to advertise "paid for" services then web-links and everything the transaction could happen off site. This would also probably be good for the reputation of the site should a dodgy key holder try and scam someone - as CM would not have been directly involved and there would be a clear disclaimer in the thread about doing this at your own risk... .

I'd also like to see lock ups within the community continuing - and it would be a shame if this could not be done with real keys. Equally however I know that I am increasingly having to consider a permanent metal device as plastic is not working. But - where I work this could be very problematic. At times I need to act as quick response so unless emergency release was clearly sorted it would be a no go for me.

Ten posts isn't really that much on this site. But 100 is quite a few. Making the process for allowing soliciting automatic (such as number of posts made) is probably for the best as it keeps it simple and denies culpability for who ever vets should it go wrong. But equally it does make me very wary of handing over my keys. There could be a way of anonomizing (if that is a word) who has what key, but that takes all the fun out of talking to your keyholder.

Personally, I don't see that there is a clear way to do this. So long as we are working through a primarily anonymous message board. The confidentiality we have on here is both a blessing and a curse. I suppose keyholders could be made to make a written application through the site disclosing more information about themselves. Which seems only fair if they are going to be the sole person who can give me access again to my penis... . Nothing would go to the sub but CM could keep details of the address/telephone number etc so they could chase up etc if anything goes wrong. This is of course not foolproof and something which admins probably wouldn't want to take on.

In an effort to simulate the experience of remote keyholding earlier in the month I signed up for the International Chastity Month thread. Which I failed ordinarily I would just move on and put it down to bad form/weakness. However, on that day I was feeling playful and decided to return to the thread admitting that I'd got "carried away" with myself and would try again for longer. Then another member suggested coming back at my unlock time to see if I should. To me this seemed in equal measures both fun and dangerous. Fun because not knowing when/if you are going to be unlocked - as I now finally know - is a very different experience, but dangerous because I don't know these people and if I were them the temptation must be great (out of either a sense of fun or spite) to deny release again and again and again. I even posted another thread a couple of days ago asking if anyone had any ideas of how that could be done fairly. To be honest I didn't expect many, if any, replies and it seemed a fairly wussy thing to do - rather than "man up" and accept what I had coming to me - but the realist in me knew that without a system it was all likely to fall apart... . Still it does rather take the fun out of things and make you seem like a bit of a kill-joy. What am I saying? Well its a bit like introducing your partner to chastity for the first time and telling them how fun it will be, how much in control they'll be, how they'll orgasm all the time at your expense. Then passing them a 100 page rule book expecting them to learn it and getting stroppy every time they go their own way. Sadly fun needs rules.

The only thing I can think of that would definitely work and make me feel both comfortable and without control would be if the keys stayed at Chastity Mansion rather than going directly to the person controlling release. Or at least that a second set of keys was sent that way for safe keeping (I know that most padlocks sadly don't come with three sets of keys as standard - so emergency release could be tricky.) Then should a relationship with a key holder go wrong the submissive could appeal to CM for resolution. They then email the keyholder and ask what is going on. If things still seem at all complicated then the key held by CM is immediately returned.

The CM site would have to have a disclaimer making it abundantly clear (for legal reasons) that they are in no way associated or monitoring the relationship between the keyholder and submissive but that they will act as a third party keyholding service in the event of difficulty achieving unlocking (with reasonable reason). Should users abuse the service because they have had enough or simply want to break their keyholders rule they could be banned from using the service again and their keyholder automatically notified. Or maybe given a second chance. What they write in their request for the key could obviously have an influence on how they are treated in subsequent cases.

Obviously this is not a solution to speedy release in the case of emergency. But if you're giving your key to a remote holder you've probably already considered that and either know you will have to wait a while or have an emergency back up system anyway that you could break into should the worst happen.

Apologies for thinking and typing at the same time. Let me know if anything needs clarification or you want any further thoughts or PM me.

 

Personally im not sure how the Mansion could offer this in the form that @OnTheEdge suggested, there is probably more self lockers than anything on here and it would become a full time job Any volunteers ?..........no didnt think so!! For the Mansion I can only see it ending in a legal disaster.

@Wendygirl said "We also have good friends who offer interesting fun and games just because they enjoy doing so . These members are very welcome and are of no worries to this discussion." and that's great as there is no money changing hands, but hey if it does that has become an agreement between themselves and was not offered as a "Professional" service at the outset.

Most importantly and sorry, cant help help it, its the day job but the Mansion would then be placing a Duty of Care upon themselves for the Health and Safety of those "Held" by a "Professional" with probably very little experience, they would appear from every where to make a fast buck, with most of them and the keys, probably never seen again.

Apologies for not having any suggestions as to take this forward in a positive way, but I cant think how it could work in the real world.. Good luck in your quest, thankful my wife holds mine.

It may be suggested that I have a "Professional" interest in the site, as i make occasional references regarding my signature, but I would like to differentiate the Two, im offering "Goods" for sale not "Services" and I have told Jens and said publicly, every device I sell that is as a result of the Mansion, will result in a donation to the cause, I wonder how many "Keyholders" would do so.

 

I can't see how the Mansion would be placing duty of care on themselves for a professional key holder. You are selling devices there is no duty of care there. So holding a key to that device would not either.

 

The potential for legal difficulties/disputes have already been mentioned above and indeed could be exacerbated over time.

It would be a shame if CM became like other sites, dominated by adverts of those seeking profit and thus taking focus away from the rather unique discussions that currently populate this site. If men want to seek out a pro-domme I'm sure google has the answers for them.

Furthermore, I'm unaware of an outpour of demands for the inclusion of pro-dommes but I could be wrong.

Those are my few thoughts, though its not something that would really concern me either way.

 

I think it's important to encourage meaningful interaction within our community. People should become members to read and learn and hopefully share things that add value to the Mansion. Thus, if someone's sole intent, or perhaps main focus, is to offer 'professional services' I think that person should not be allowed to do so.
If someone does the above but also has previously over time added significant value to the membership then perhaps it would be ok.
Another thing is those who join and post that they are looking for subs but don't say anything about money or anything like that. Again I think that should not be allowed if it's obvious that their sole intent or main focus in being a member is to do so.
Deciding what the 'clear intent' is would be an individual case by case judgement call, but I think that's what the Board is for.

I like the idea of a minimum amount of time being a member as well as a minimum amount of posts before being allowed access to lost and found. This in conjunction with swift and consistent removing of threads with such content being posted in the incorrect area I think might be the way to go.

 

I have been on this site a few years now, watched folk come and go (no pun intended), and the one thing I feel that has remained constant is the ability of the community to spot and (usually) politely let those who treat keyholding as a true money-making exercise head out the door. Yes, we have a few genuine keyholders among us who charge nominal fees, but these are regulars, supportive and usually major contributors to the community's discussions.

I don't believe anything needs to change. I feel the community is extremely well self-policed. I trust our Admins and Board to act when appropriate, and I think the continued growth of the community is a great reflection on those folk. Let's not go overboard. In fact, my feeling is, let's leave things as they are and let our leaders do their thing the way they have been!

I'm also going to take this opportunity to thank our Admin/Board members for all their great work, and welcome back those we have missed!

 

Another site I use has a Members Services section. It works pretty well.

Here on CM we could have a listing of anyone that contributes here and wants to offer their services, whether that be cages made, or keys held, or whatever. It wouldn't be a busy section, but it would serve a purpose.

And we could have a separate section called Hook-Ups (for instance) where anyone wanting to place a situations vacant type ad could do so, whether they're a contributing member or not. No 10-posts rule, we want them to have a good time here, and we want to keep them here, who knows they might even have a good time and join in one day. We have thousands of members who lurk as it is anyway. If any piss-takers or scam artists join and post they get deleted as usual.

I dont think the 10-post rule is workable, as people just ignore it and it needs constant monitoring.
We should at least have a system that does work - even if it needs constant monitoring. We do that already anyway.

I don't want to see the site littered with flashing ads, but I'd be happy with a small banner ad top-right that could change every 30 seconds or something. If we needed more money to pay for a bigger server, more bandwidth etc.
I dont know who would want to pay to advertise, but kink is a big world, I'm sure there's a few that would.

 

Good post @SubVerity just out of interest and its something I have to deal with regularly, as most people have absolutely not a clue just what it actually costs to produce an item like mine in that material, I know how much my website costs to maintain as i built it and its negligible compared to the £10,000 I have invested in my home workshop, Just how much does it cost to keep a site like this running ? PM welcome too from Jens if he would rather not divulge and i appreciate that.

 

It would perhaps though bring it to the fore front of those, and im sure there are many that think this is all free at the point of entry much like our world leading 2nd to none NHS!!
Regards Ti

 

When Jens took the site on it was around £100 a month. I imagine that might be a bit more once we've been upgraded to some new and shinier electrical famulating grub-trunions.

 

That's not too bad for what you have, i pay £15 ish a month + the site url costs, but will never need the bandwidth, I couldn't make em that quick haha and we dont know what he paid to aquire it and I would never ask, thanks for your honesty.
Regards Ti

 

@SubVerity I was under the impression that a 'minimum posts rule' could be automated. The site already keeps track of how many posts a member has so my thought was that it was possible to create a rule to restrict access to certain areas of the site until that counter hit a certain number and then the system would recognize that and the privilege would be automatic. I guess maybe XenForo doesn't have the capability, but I have seen that kind of system before.
If it had to be done manually, my vote swings the other way, for sure. That would be pretty ridiculous I think.

 

I think there is a place for all. I think what is key is participation in the site and interaction. Not just using the site as an advertising post.

There are subs here I'm sure who would like a genuine KH and dommes here genuinely looking for subs to KH. So if they can tie up here, that's good, both amateur and pro.

Back to my initial thought. Community is key.

 

My thinking is not to restrict our site only to those that want to chatter on threads. There is more to contributing than chattering.

It might be possible to have an automated system that restricted access - by why, WHY would a forum want to restrict itself, or to restrict it's members. Surely it would want to include rather than to exclude.

Spammers and the like can FRO of course!

 

Community is key - but not all the community is chatty. Some of the community just reads stuff, and lurks. Doesnt mean they're not our community, just that you dont know who they are, and they've never said hello. They're still our members.

 

Community is key - but not all the community is chatty.
Just lurking is a totally neutral position.

Agreed - exclude only on evidence....of trying for custom without chatting, communicating with anyone.

Anyone suspicious of another member should report them to the mods for further investigation. We can open up dialog and decide.

 

That's exactly my belief, I was approached directly recently by just such a Pro, and I must admit I did lead her on considerably just to gain a profile to forward to the Admins, and I must admit not as long as the guy from lets say the Indian Subcontinent area of the world who called me at home I might add advising he was calling on behalf of all people in the York area, who had working Engineering, and had suffered from Deafness and could make a claim on my behalf !!! What ? Pardon ? Sorry ? Im mutton geoff (sorry Yorkshire ) ? You'll have to speak up mate ?? long shot is whilst, watching tv i managed to keep him on for 45 minutes, happy days !! On another similar issue, I hold a UK PPL whilst flying to take some photographs as a passenger in a fellow members aircraft (also an instuctor) we experienced engine failure and crashed on take off resulting in the attendance of the Yorkshire Air Ambulance (now my charity of choice) Every time that episode is re-shown both my work and private mobiles are bombarded with people wanting to make a claim, Please can anyone advise me how this happens and where they get my numbers from?? (Sorry long post and slightly off subject )
regards Ti

 

It's late and I've been out all day and all evening so I'm not going to pretend to have read all of the rest of this thread (yet)! But...

I quite agree. As you probably already realize it was intended as a thought exercise rather than a fully-formed practical suggestion. I hope it contributed to the debate though.

Will look through the rest of the thread first though tomorrow before I make any further comment or I might already be out of date

(Oh and self lockers can look after themselves - in this case I was thinking more about members who had had a remote keyholder go rogue.)