My Fiance and I are both young (in our early 20's). I introduced Chastity and bondage to my fiance when we where discussing our fantasies. I have fantasized about chastity and submission for quite some time now but she is entirely new to anything even remotely "kinky". While initially hesitant she is slowly growing more comfortable both with being a key holder and becoming more confident and dominant. For my birthday she purchased my first cage and we have been experimenting for just under a month now. After the initial break in period and letting her warm up to this we are potentially looking to make it more lifestyle oriented and less just a bedroom game. I found this site while researching various chastity ideas and topics and thought it looked like a phenomenal resource for 2 people just getting started with this.As we are both new I would definitely appreciate any advice for either myself or her as we begin this new and exciting journey.
Welcome to the mansion. Congratulations on your new Journey. We too are relatively new to this having only been at it for several months. My advice is to take it slow,keep stretching your limits in time locked up. My longest lockup was 18 days ,my last lock up was 11 days.I have just been relocked and I'm hoping this time will be the one where she keeps me locked from now on.
Welcome to the Mansion, glad to see you found us so early in your journey. There is plenty advice available in a variety of threads. Personally, I would say, go slowly and go together. You have been interested in this for quite some time whereas your partner is quite new to it. The best way to explore is together, enjoying the experiences and understanding what makes it enjoyable for each other. There is also the fact that it can take some time to get used to wearing a device. If you both start knowing that it is a journey, not a race, you will have a great time I am sure.
She doesn't at this point seem too keen keeping me locked for long periods of time. She is more into the control aspect of knowing that I can't touch myself or achieve a full erection without her permission.
welcome. Ask away. I think thats completely normal in the beginning. give her time to find her feet and she will blow your socks off. Just dont give her things to read, talk about chastity, or ask to go longer. From what i hear from other keyholders that can be a turn off. Just show her how much you appreciate her and you'll do fine.
Remember to enjoy the journey. You will be amazed at how quick things can progress. I brought up chastity to my now wife and goddess about 18 months ago. The first few months were very slow, and more of an interest in tease and denial than anything else. I would be locked up for a few days or a week and then we would be vanilla for a few weeks. Now we are in a full time D/s relationship where my cock is locked up at all times it is not being used. I enjoy it immensely but I would not have wanted to skip past the time leading to this point. I recommend keeping a journal. It is a great way to see and remember how things progress. Be honest about your interests but not pushy. I think many men like me crave instant gratification and want to go from zero to hero, but there is so much fun ground to cover in the middle. It was a fun and exciting journey that brought us both much closer together.
I was very slow to the idea of being a longtime keyholder. But as I took baby steps through new territory I was able to explore this new lifestyle in more detail. If we had rushed into things I probably would have become overwhelmed and ditched the entire thing. It might take longer than you'd like, but make sure you give her the time and space she needs to explore on her own. This journey is with both of you, but still very personal! Let it bring you guys closer together!
When we started out she unlocked me every night, rubbed me with vitamin e oil, which always led to an O. Then she discovered ruined orgasms, then she was fond of me performing oral on her everyday which was about her and I stayed locked. Then toys. After the toys (Johnson) she began to stop feeling guilty about keeping me locked. Then it gradually became something she gave as a gift to me since she had so much more pleasure with toys. It’s gradual and it has to be at her pace. I always refer to a driving analogy...you don’t ask someone to drive and then complain about the route or speed...let em drive. I myself have never been a “I hope she keeps me locked” Guy, I always want out, but I trust she knows how to drive and let her.