In a female led relationships does the submissive have a voice?

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by Rodeo cowboy, Jul 9, 2020.

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In a female led relationship does the submissive have a voice

  1. Does he have a say and no vote

    24 vote(s)
    46.2%
  2. Does he have a say and and a vote

    16 vote(s)
    30.8%
  3. Decisions are equal with equal votes

    12 vote(s)
    23.1%
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  1. Rodeo cowboy
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    Rodeo cowboy Active member

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    I very interested in how the dynamic plays out in your relationship.
     
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  2. MRS.Lilith
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    My husband gets to state his opinion on everything, and usually we make decisions together. However, I hold the final vote usually, so I have ticked option two.
    Aside from being my sub he's also my cherished life partner, and I would not want to exclude his opinion from anything because I value him and what he brings to my life.
    Only in the bedroom he has no veto.
     
  3. MissyB
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    I'd opt for a say but decisions are made by her. He has to trust her judgement, agree to follow her, and let her lead. She has to understand him and be judicial in making choices that can have significant consequences. But he obviously wants her in charge and wants to submit, so that puts her in control. But just my opinion.
     
  4. Rodeo cowboy
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    In hindsight I should have mad3 two separate polls. One for the D or F in the Flr and a separate for the s type or males in a Flr.
    I used the poll format as it is anonymous. I am excited to read your comments, opinions, and if you care to I would be interested in reading why you think the way you do.

    Thank you for sharing with us.

    Rodeo
     
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  5. Jinkyu
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    If course the submissive does have a voice. It just may have a ballgag, hood, or dildo muffeling it!

    J/k
     
  6. King Hippo
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    It is different from couple to couple.
     
  7. jemima
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    i dont know really what you mean about vote. i am allow to vote in the govment one and i vote waht Mistress votes. i have got a voice but i am quiet when im told to shut up.
     
  8. Xileh
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    #8 Xileh, Jul 9, 2020
    Last edited: Jul 9, 2020
    It depends upon the topic of discussion or the situation.

    If it is a large or difficult decision, we work together. We have been a successful team and that has not changed with a FLR.

    During certain activities where safety is involved and/or certain technical knowledge is required, she prefers me to take the helm.

    Day to day, she calls the shots. No votes are solicited.
     
  9. L-u-c-y
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    He does have a say, but what he says can be ignored. If he doesn't like it he can vote with his feet.
     
  10. MrsBR_Saiph
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    He always has a voice. As an individual it is impossible to see all sides of any situation. It is through discussion we learn and grow and talk through other perspectives before making decisions. It is a poor leader that refuses to hear and listen to the voice of their subordinate in relationships as is similar in a work environment.
    I would however be lying if I said I generally didn't get my way. My BR does defer to my decisions, but when he is right I accept that, it is just rare. When he objects I just need to work him over a little until he sees the light. :p
     
  11. SubSnuggler
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    Even the best leader needs other voices in the room to see all the sides of an issue. Our women are no different.

    In my FLR, we discuss decisions all the time. My wife values my opinion and input greatly.

    But you answered your own question with the limitation of being in a FLR. There is no voting in a FLR. If there was, it wouldn't be a FLR. It's her making the final decisions and me helping her make them happen.

    If I don't like it that's tough. If you signed up for the FLR lifestyle, you've made your own bed and can't pick and choose when you want to lay in it.
     
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  12. MistressMusespet
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    In our life. Ms Val and Sir make all the decisions. I only follow them. They know what's good for us.
     
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  13. Darlydixon
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    I agree too this totally it works in all manners of life
     
  14. filltee
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    All depends on the relationship you and the dynamic you share.
    And its different in some way in every case.

    I sometimes wonder what is the point of asking questions that will doubtless invoke responses similar to mine.

    Just saying.
     
  15. Rodeo cowboy
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    I asked an opened ended question with an anonymous poll for a couple of reasons.

    I wanted people to be comfortable answering the poll. Using a Anonymous poll versus a post with a question I hope will allow members feel more comfortable participating.

    To start a conversation that whoever chose could participate in from the least knowledgeable (me) to more knowledgeable members whose experience and knowledge make them immensely valuable participants such as yourself.

    I appreciate your participation and adding to the depth and breadth of the conversation. Your contribution has added value to the overall conversation.

    I acknowledge the question was not artfully crafted.

    Best
     
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  16. Xileh
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    You are so correct.

    I think that is what makes these discussions so interesting. I find it fascinating to read the different ways people answer a seemingly simple question that should only require an equally simple answer. But, then, curiosity has always been one of my greatest failings - and successes.
     
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  17. madams-sissysub
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    Madam makes the decisions and her word is final, she is in control, I am allowed to make suggestions, and madam will listen to them, and sometimes agree, but she always has the last say.
     
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  18. JKL
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    I have a say but never the final word.
     
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  19. bondinchas
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    It has to be consensual from both sides, otherwise it's abuse.
    If it's consensual, then both have a vote, even if one or other only exercises it by choosing not to vote.
     
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  20. MrsBR_Saiph
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    Curiosity is the mother of invention as they say. It is a great quality to have in this life as it keeps the journey moving forward. Focus on the successes
     
  21. hardbodysub
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    hardbodysub BrokeTheMold

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    I'm not trying to be nitpicky, but I don't think the poll results are meaningful because of the typo and omission in the poll question. I'm surprised that nobody has commented on it:
    1. Does he have a say and no vote
    2. Does he have a say and and a vote
    3. Decisions are equal with equal votes
    What is #2 supposed to mean? "A say and a vote" would be the same as #3. "A say but no vote" would be identical to #1. The clearly missing possibilty is "No say and no vote.," but it would make more sense for that to be #1, and #2 to be "A say and no vote," so that there is a logical progression from no voice to equal voice"

    1. No say, no vote
    2. Allowed to voice opinion, but no vote
    3. Equal say, equal vote
     
  22. branded_hubby
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    Misstress and I would both be considered highly intelligent by the academic definitions of the word - although she insists I was short changed on common sense! My opinion is genuinely respected in all matters, but I'm not sure I really have a vote. I'm allowed to talk back on parenting issues, but that's really all.
     
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  23. SubSnuggler
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    This morning after 2 hours of play (for her) I get the speech: "No orgasm for you today, go lock up. Remember that you can never go back. Once the genie is out of the bottle it will never ever return"

    She loves it....and so do I (grr and grin)
     
  24. LockedPom
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    It's not unusual for a wife to have the last word. However, if a husband has no voice then it is an abusive relationship as far as I'm concerned.
     
  25. Samir
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    Even if we have an opinion, it's HER choice if SHE wants to listen or not.
     
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