I screwed up. I got carried away milking and didn’t stop before i had an unauthorized climax while still in my cage. This violated my Mistress’s control of my climaxes, which She regulates very closely. Instead of waiting for a time when She would grant me a climax, my selfish behavior cheated Her of this joy. I feel horrible about this and realize that this has really hurt my Mistress Keyholder Wife by reducing Her trust in me and in my behavior. I want to say that i didn’t mean to do this and that it just happened. But actually, it didn’t “just happen”-- i knew that i was close and yet i kept on milking, ignoring the little voice inside me that said “danger, danger”. And then, when the climax started, i was unable to stop it. The worst part is that i didn’t really enjoy the climax that much. I mean, i won’t deny that it was good, but even at the height, i was disappointed in myself that this had happened and that Mistress hadn’t given me the green light and wasn’t there to enjoy it or amuse Herself with my climax. So now i have to endure the consequences. I need to rebuild Mistress’ confidence by keeping control of my urges and submitting fully to her. I need to accept that She will remind me of my mistake and taunt me on my lack of control, both in private and with some of Her Friends. And i will set a new personal record for abstaining by going at least 80 days before my next climax, this time, one that Mistress directs and allows.
I understand what you're going through. I too recently had an unauthorized orgasm. I told my wife/DKH and was punished. I was out of my cage when it happened and I know that I disappointed her. I'm back in the cage again and will do better next time.
I think some of us have been where you are. It's sad to fail and be weak but we know that point of no return and we cum. Take your punishment and learn from it.
Thanks for your responses--they are right on the mark. I am trying to humbly accept the consequences. I originally wrote this post as an apology to my Mistress and then we decided to bring it to you all. It's encouraging to hear that others have worked through this, too.
The details of how your relationship works is only know by the two of you. How I situation like this is delt with is also between you and your Wife. So be a man and except what ever punishment she gives you, a small mistake isn’t the end of a great relationship it’s only a stepping stone to making your relationship stronger and stronger. Good Luck.
well least you am sorry that you done it and I spect that after you been punish you migt be forgive a bit. please was you being milk or something else cos milking just makes the mess dribble out a bit. it dont spurt.
Well put Mash. Training for him by her. Always a good thing. Trouble sitting for a few days will help with the lesson.
I am lucky that we have a super strong relationship. My mistake disappointed my Mistress, but it won't jeopardize our Femdom dynamic or overall relationship. We both want our kink to be "real", not just a game we play or scene we do. I try to submit and usually do a passing job of it, but when I fail like this I realize how far I have to go. I appreciate your replies. Your empathy is encouraging, as is your message to do the time, since I've committed the crime.
I fail on occasion. It is all part of the struggle. My Ms, although disappointed when I fail, understands how hard I struggle to be chaste for her. But she also enjoys that I fail because it shows how difficult it all is. She likes the fact that it is so hard for me. Not that her enjoyment of my failures negates the consequences, the worst of which is my own shame.
Giving a quick conclusion to this: my Keyholder Wife granted me an unexpected gift -- a ruined climax a few days ago. She decided to give this a few days shy of the full 80-day sentence i had earned for climaxing without Her approval in November. It was very quick and almost non-sexual, although i was grateful indeed. Lesson learned, i will be more careful and not have any more mistakes.
We do edging a lot (a whole lot), and anal edging can be tough because I'm not really sure where the edge is at if that makes sense. It's good that your Mistress forgave you.
I once let my madam down, she was treating me to an edging session, and I held off telling her I was at a 9 for a few seconds, and it turned into a ruined orgasam, Madam was furious at first, until I explained it was ruined, then she found it amusing, but was still displeased with me for trying to get a little more than I was due.