What is / are the primary purpose(s) of chastity for you / your partner? What is the appeal or benefit to you and / or your partner?
I prefer to see it as a "lifestyle enhancement." I guess maybe that's close to "relationship enhancement" as opposed to "marriage enhancement" since my GF aren't married, but I picked "Other." Basically, it serves all of the purposes you list in your poll. It was originally used as a sex toy that also served to keep me focused on her pleasure only unless and until she was willing to let me have some focus on mine. I was the first guy she'd ever put in chastity, and once she saw how insanely attentive I was with her and how focused on giving her orgasms I was when I wasn't able to worry about my own cock, she has basically made it a permanent thing. She sees it as a lifestyle enhancer as well. But in reality, it serves all of those purposes you have listed in some way or another for us. Good question, btw.
Other. It’s somewhere between sex toy and marital enhancement. Even more, it is a way of life. It’s not a toy, she really likes the control.
Multiple reasons... personally chastity for me is primarily orgasm denial which keeps me on much more of a sexual edge that Mistress/Wife takes advantage of for her needs. She is too a point in her life she where she can orgasm multiple times almost daily. If I was not caged I would never be interested in keeping her happy. On a relationship level, I am totally submissive to her needs and her service. I take are of household and Mistress needs (non sexual) for anything she desires. In a sense over the years I feel less when I am not caged and lock. Sometimes Mistress will play with me too for enjoyment (although not her main thing) because I enjoy being the toy and being controlled. Its a rare treat and she uses it sparingly.
The short answer is all of them, but I’m not a great believer in shorts answers and that doesn’t paint the whole picture, and so here is the more comprehensive reasoning: Initially, the cage was a kink. It was arousing to be locked, it’s part of the reasons most (and myself) get into this… but overtime it loses that appeal, it becomes the norm, and now I would say that’s no longer applicable. Wearing a cage creates something more akin to frustration. I find myself playing this subtle game where I don’t mention it at all if I’m unlocked and hope that my wife forgets to ask me to lock up. As a sex toy with control? No, my wife enjoys that I cannot/will not climax without her, but ultimately she is more turned on with me out of my cage. There has been a new development on this front though: the key. When I asked her why she seems far more involved with ny chastity now she is wearing it 24/7. She explained that it’s a constant reminder that she controls my penis. It’s like the cage was for me when we first started! Personal/marital improvement. I’ve learned that in better on most fronts when I don’t orgasm. It ticks both those boxes.
All of them. It started as the idea of being locked and obeying to a womans wishes. Kink. Then after showing it and FLR to my wife it made me focus more - not only on her - and stop my jerking addiction. Since she controls my libido we both have better sex and we both are more openminded to new things. If I am locked it calms me down somehow. So it improves everything.
I did select all of them. That said, my partner has told me that it doesn't actually turn her on, rather she just likes it. There is a subtle difference. When she asks me not to climax, then after she has her orgasm I can give her a better seeing too which she says she really likes and feels good (and I really love that as well) . For some reason prior to her orgasm I have a lot of trouble holding back, but once she has I have much better control. Possibly the anticipation of her orgasm is such a turn on. When I do cum she likes me to climax with her, which is always awesum, but that is the end of it, I deflate pretty quickly...lol.
For us, it's now become something akin to birth control.... call it orgasm control. It's a guardrail that prevents us from from going too far during physical intimacy and keeps me from playing with myself when alone. Because of that it's really enhanced our relationship. Its possible that we could live now without it, but orgasms are such a powerful drug that it's better to continue with this guardrail in place. It's why going without birth control is so risky. While we can no longer get pregnant, the consequences would be damaging to our relationship. To my wife, she still believes I need this to prevent myself from masturbation. There were elements of kink and personal improvement for me in the beginning. There may still be an underlying element of kink that I would realize is still there if we stopped chastity. But it's not something I am as cognizant of as i was at the start. It's reached a place where it feels natural to me. I'm no longer worried about discovery in airport security or the gym locker room. It's just a matter of time before someone becomes aware of my device. From a personal improvement perspective, it's become a new norm. I channel time and energy towards pleasing my wife and pursuing friendships instead of focusing on selfish pleasures. Frequent tease and orgasm denial have boosted my testosterone and libido instead of resorting to T replacement therapy. We are able to accomplish it naturally without drugs. As far as I can tell, it's never been a sex toy for my wife. While it has put her in control in the bedroom, she has never expressed any personal appreciation for the device or any enjoyment from being a dominant. She really enjoys the intimacy we have now and misses it greatly when one of us is sick or away overnight. The things she does enjoy about the cage is it prevents me from making a mess of her and the sheets when she teases me and it prevents me from forcing my little guy upon her. Again, that's not so much a sex toy as it is a guardrail.
The primary purpose of my chastity device is give Mistress the control she loves, and to instill in me the knowledge & experience that I belong to her.
It is a kink for me. She has gradually enjoyed the control but more from the standpoint that it makes me happy so she is fine with holding the key and deciding when I'm allowed to enjoy sex. It has absolutely brought us closer together so a plus for the marriage but I truly didn't believe it would when I proposed chastity. Is she becoming more confident with asking for an orgasm without feeling the necessity to reciprocate. Yep. She is much more comfortable with having me service her needs or just grabbing the vibrator for an orgasm and leaving me locked up.
For us it is easy. My wife is bi and leans heavily towards women for sex. She could live her life without my penis with no problem. So chastity is a way for sex to be just for her pleasure and not have to deal with my sexual needs but still tease me and make me want her. She loves sexually teasing me and laughs when I strain against my cage.
Originally the thought turned me on but I had also become vaguely aware that I had a porn and masterbation addiction. When I first bought and put on the cage it was exciting, of course (kink), but it was to save myself for my wife who I knew thought I lasted too long (She didn't know why, but she does now) Over time she has come to the realisation that we are better and happier when I'm caged and mostly denied. So I'd say it started with 1, then 4 became aparent very quickly, then over time as 1 has virtually disappeared 3 has come into play with 4. I'm turned on by my wife teasing me about being locked or playing with me caged or not. It isn't the actual cage that is the kink anymore. As I'm wasting less time thinking about it, it is often only when we engage that I'm even aroused. Certainly I am on a mission of self-improvement and the cage has helped us get to a better us. The changes that the dynamic has on my mind are remarkable at times.