Erection control Vs. Orgasm control?

Which has the most impact ... hmmm ...

After an almost 4 decades of having my orgasms controlled, I would say this is the most impactful of the two. This is a lifestyle. Almost all the time has been under the Honor System.

My first erection controlling device was a Lori's in 2019 - now have a few.

Even though orgasm denial is the most impactful, erection denial is by far the more difficult for me.

 

I'm torn on this one. I'm fairly new to chastity. My GF/keyholder has been out of town all week and I'm currently on my longest stretch of lockup. Not my longest without orgasm. She told me tonight to unlock overnight, no touching and lock back up after my morning coffee. Yes, I have the backup key while she's out of town. The thing is, I don't want to unlock. She wants me to get hard, feel it but do nothing with it and lock back up after the morning routine is done.

What's worse in this situation? Being able to get hard again and not do anything about it or just the idea of getting hard in general?

As much as I hate to admit it, I need much much more time without either to make any judgment.

 

I don't come out unless it's for travel (I fly a lot and have a plastic cage) or for supervised washing. so I am not allowed an erection and not allowed to cum. Miss enforces this and I am quite happy with this,

 

I'm bi, it happens my kh came out as trans not long after that post so I now have a female kh, different dynamic but still great.

 

At first it was orgasm control which is a huge behaviour controlling factor.
But the thing which hit me hardest, happened way back, when my first Mistress didn’t want to see me erect. (Only something for Her man at the time).
Basically She introduced erection control. It felt as just an extra step, but an harsh one stratifying us more in our Ds relationship. Physically okay to do, due to my impotence. It didn’t stop Her from teasing, punishing me etc etc. But She was quite serious believe me.
(Voted for erection control)

 

Erection denial. For sure. She keeps the lock ups long now because unfortunately im usually lukewarm on keeping chastity going at all as it is, and as we know it’s much much harder after an O, and her record of unlocking me without ultimately letting me have an O isn’t great.

After a while, especially if she’s putting in the effort to really demonstrate dominance, I start to feel genuinely submissive (In a way I think we both wish I would by default) and the lack of orgasms becomes a bit easier to deal with.

But no erection for months does seem to be the real mindfuck. She discovered that early on and has always insisted on a particularly stifling cage. Not to be mean but she knows I struggle with submission, and at least in that area has wisely used my affinity for objectification as a way to maintain a baseline by keeping me from having real erections.

As others have alluded to, I have often pleaded my case for a boner by assuring her I’m not trying to weasel out an O. Either way, she wisely says no.

 

Both are intense but have to go with erection control as most impactful; seems to be more of mindfuck.

There are some days that are so F'n surreal of realizing I'm locked in a metal cage and don't have control over a very intrinsic body function that until we started this journey I've always had control... ZERO complaints as I LOVE my Goddess @n2toys controlling me and it's Her decision on when I'm allowed out and/or get a release.

 

I’d say orgasm control has the biggest impact on US but erection control has the biggest impact on ME. By limiting my orgasms my wife ensures her needs are met completely and I’m always wanting her. By limiting my erections I’m reminded that she’s in charge of this area of our lives and dependent on her permission for even the most basic of sexual pleasures.

 

Great post I empathize with. For me my loves orgasms are most important. I actually enjoy attempted erections in my device. But my chastity desire is to enjoy giving my wife oral orgasms while locked with no opportunity for intercourse at any time. I would gladly go down on her daily caged but sadly she isn't that interested anymore and thats my chastity frustration. I no longer desire intercourse or even my own orgasms but to kiss her body anywhere anytime is my desire.

 

I'd say erection control is harder because for the most part it's involuntary. But I don't worry about it as much. I can get a pseudo erection in the cage. I allow it, kind o like it. The hard thing for me is orgasm control. Between the urge, which is over the top, to control while having sex is a tremendous challenge. Working it though.