Why are you in chasity?

I found chastity on the orgasmdenial website, which until recently still existed but it now appears gone (its still on the wayback machine), it was probably the busiest of all forums back then and I put a lot of material into, it was never maintained and better options like this forum came along and it decayed into just bots. I played with chastity a little with my exwife, but it didn't save our marriage that was un-savable, chastity doesn't work in a loveless marriage.

My partner with which we share a deep mutual love met on the basis of Chasity on a fetish website, the first time we met in the flesh I was in chastity. So in our case we were both predisposed to chastity.

These days however we have a fairly vanilla sex life, I am locked until we have sex and she likes me to cum with her so I do, and I dont mind either way as long as she is happy. She always threatens me with orgasm denial amongst other things which keeps me on my toes. She has been threatening about 2024 being the year though...2 days in and we shall see

If I turned sissy my partner would run for the door so quickly there could be flames.

 

For me it's a few things.

1) I like the feeling of being 'held' down there.

2) I masturbate too much.

3) It's good practice for a future relationship.

 

I originally wore a cage as a sex toy, the feeling of something gripping me all day.

It wasn't until I started reading up further that orgasm denial and key holding became a thing

We are still 70-80% chastity being my thing, but I offer words of encouragement each time we have sex and I stay locked

So long as we both enjoy it, I'm happy to be locked and denied, when it gets in the way of our sex life rather than enhancing it, it'll stop (or pause)

 

Before the internet, we heard about sex through word of mouth or stolen books magazines that were hidden with great care. Learning something's in Catholic school before moving on and taking a different course in my life. The first city I landed in and before calling it home I found the dirty part of town with the bookstores, gay bars leather bars. Bookstores became my hangout and being honest easy they were open 24/7 and being homeless, make a few dollars to eat. It was also where I would meet Sir, my mentor, took me out for food at a clock restaurant. After hearing my story, offered me a job working at a bar he owned, the Eagle, and a room in his house until I got back on my feet. I restocked the coolers and cleaned the bar/play room. My first rule was keeping a journal and read a book from the large library in Sirs home, mixing reading up with BDSM books. His friend came one weekend and his slave was in chastity, it was a tollyboy and looked so medieval I could not get it out of my mind. As I think back, Sir was hoping for that with me because within four months mine would come, and I would start my life of being owned by another. So when I think of chastity, it is not when my last release was or the next, but the service I bestow on my owner and if it meets all requirements, then I am unlocked. I cannot worry about something I have never owned, thank you.

 

We kind of fell into this aspect of our sex lives by chance. We invested in a selection of traditional sex toys just to add to intimacy and amongst the usual toys, vibrators, handcuffs, cock rings etc was a cock cage. We started simply with me caged and her doing her thing to tease me. This escalated to days caged and her teasing and me having to satisfying her with whatever means without the use of my penis.

In my experience with my previous sexual partners there was always "a need to perform", and I have never had any doubts in my ability, being caged lifted that burden from me when we are not having PIV sex.

Size of my penis isn't a factor and never has been in any of my sexual relationships, so I can discount that in my case.

My wife and KH controls everything in respect to the sexual side of our relationship. I enjoy being controlled, and sometimes she wants to be controlled, and I'm freed to use my penis, so it's a nice symmetry.

She likes to see my bodily responses to not being able to become erect of have a traditional ejaculation. It's very much a battle of wits and wills!

She loves to leave me begging for release and stopping what she is doing and enjoy my frustration, but then again, it is no different to me stopping stimulation of her clit or G spot !

 

Actually this is a nice part of chastity. In normal vanilla sex I always have that nagging feeling of, 'am I hard enough yet' and 'am I lasting long enough'. When locked you don't have to worry about that.

 

It is a big step to introduce her to that. But once you do it and she gets to realize the benefits of it, your life will be a lot better. Rest assured it is a tough sell to most women because they can not understand the true situation. They can not feel what we feel, especially while locked up. The rush is unbelievable. Take it slow but be honest with her and things should go well. My friend i secretly locked for about a month before I went all in on telling my wife. I just wanted to make sure that I could handle it. Good call on your part and I think you are ready for the real thing. When it happens, just do not overwhelm your wife with it because that will kill it right away. She needs to ease into it and she might forget your are locked at times and not realize how horny you are and why. it takes time so give it that. Good luck moving forward.

 

Thank you for the kind words. We had a very long talk three days ago which ended with me being caged. She’s not physically holding the key but she knows why I’m locking and she approves. She was even flattered when I told her it’s like a second wedding ring: a symbol of my sexual devotion to her.

This has been my kink much longer than we’ve been married. I’ve gone as long as 3 months self locking. I’ve got the endurance to be patient while she warms up to this. I want her to slowly discover what it is to have a chaste husband. Eventually we’ll find what works for us. It will be different than most but it will be ours and I will cherish it.

 

When we started dating over 30 years ago, we were heavily into kink. We switched top / bottom roles all the time. After a while I kept hearing concerns about me cheating on her. The internet and CB--2000 had the solution . I found out like many others that you could pull out of this ball trap device. I already had both PA and frenum piercings
so the next logical step was to incorporate them into the device. This made chastity very real for me. After many months, then years in this situation, I was eventually conditioned to be the submissive one in the relationship. My wife would make me beg for release. She told me she no longer wanted to be tied up and that my chastity would be the ' norm' . Fast forward to present to my ED issues due to high blood pressure medicine. The fact that she didn't want to help resolve my ED made me feel very emasculated which has sucked me down a sissy rabbit hole. Thus, over the years I have been transformed into a submissive sissy that caters to my wife's need and wants. I am now locked in an Evotion wearables device that is almost never removed. The ED combined with the chastity device makes it nearly impossible to self indulge. My only means of release now is via a vibrator applied to my tucked/chaste member while in bondage.... All at the digression of my wife. Be careful what you wish for.

 

Cos i am.

 

After 30+ years together things had started to get stale in the bedroom. Fully committed to each other and still deeply in love, we started on a path of sexual discovery. We both stumbled on chastity and I eventually bought a cage and presented myself to her locked. She mostly liked it but it has taken time to for Her to be fully committed. For us, it has leveled our sexual desire levels, has let Her no longer feel guilty about her decreasing sex drive, and is our sexy secret that keeps us both excited.

Now that She is fully committed to it, we are thinking that it will be a permanent part of our relationship because it has had so many positive impacts. But, who knows, relationships continuously evolve and what feels right now might not sometime down the road. For now, we are enjoying it all.

 

I fell down a reddit rabbit hole one day and after ordering a cage I was hooked. I like the constricting feeling so the smaller the cage the better. Sph has always been a kink of mine then I discovered esteem and ball busting which I love more than actually having sex

 

I just love it, that’s why.
I have been interested in chastity for 20 years. now married to my wife, we have had alll kind of kinks. Both ways, me on the top, she on the top.

She has been a bit careful when on top. But now the last months I somehow got her convinced that she is the ruler, the boss and the goddess. She seems to understand it now and starts to love it. She controls me, my orgasms and all of my money. And I am so thankful for that.

Last release, don’t remember and now it seems that I don’t even care. Just loving being locked by her and for her.
But has to been honest and not to rush into things. Taking it easy and going in her pace, her rules. It’s about her, not me.

 

Just found this thread... I've mentioned in other threads, but for those who are new here, I got into solo chastity to help me put an end to a decades-long jerking off habit. I've been hypersexual since puberty and was a player and a party animal throughout my 20's and 30's. I'm in my early 40's now and situations have changed for me, so I decided it was time to change my lifestyle.

I wanted to be more productive while at my PC and that meant I had to stop jerking off multiple times every day, so I tried chastity and it turned into a fetish for Tease & Denial unto myself. Go figure! But what I absolutely love about being in chastity is I get a serious high off wanting to jerk off (particularly when watching porn) and not being able to because I'm locked up. This sensation has a similar but even stronger effect than smoking/inhaling or drinking something that'll just ensure a really bad day the following morning... Not to mention, I don't throw away my hard earned paycheck just to get off since I don't need that garbage anymore. So, chastity gives me a good reason to stay clean & sober, which I've been for over 2 years now!

Really, I wish I had discovered this years ago... Things might've been better for me alot sooner.

 

You are approaching it the right way. Ease her into it and leave it at that. Make sure it is always for her benefit and be sure to take care of her before you at all times. Keep it on her mind only when she mentions it. That is how my wife and I started. It took a while but after some time, I found myself locked up on a regular basis. And then, I found myself with an appointment to get pierced (Totally fucking hot) but it got done. And then, soon after that, I found myself in a Lori's tube locked up for real and loving every minute of it. It is a journey for sure so enjoy every minute of it and take care of your Wife / Keyholder because that is what it is really all about.

 

Simply put, To forget I have or own a penis.

 

She demands that I'm locked

 

My first owner required it 24/7, found I loved not only my orgasms but any physical touch of my cock. Love the constant reminder of it’s presence.

 

To be a better husband. For my wife to have more control. For the exciting fun it brings us

 

For us it's not a lifestyle, but an kink to spice up life occasionally. Mylady likes to play around the topic of tease and denial und letting my performance in some fields derive the duration of a lockup. See my occasional reports on her ideas. It also happens when I'm doing office work from home, she puts me in for me "getting things done" although an internet full of porn would be available, also shackled to my chair.

 

My mistress is seriously into it. She gets very aroused while I'm locked. I don't really like it all the time but I'm swept away by her need for it and I care about her very much. With a long enough orgasm denial I do get to the stage of acceptance and find some contentment in being her slave and worshipping her body. I also like ball torture and punishment pegging just sometimes wish it wasn't all or nothing but her rules are it's 100%.

 

I believed it was something my then wife and I had stumbled across whilst we were browsing and that we mutually decided we would try it
I now know our stumbling across was contrived and it was definitely something she wanted us to get into. Or rather me to get into and us to experience together

I don't mind the sleight of hand but probably would not have refused the idea had she been open about it, as they say I was up for just about owt back then as long as it involved no other guys

 

Mistress told me to lock it up, and that I was in chastity because that's what I wanted. At first I didn't agree that that is what I wanted (privately...I didn't say that to her), but after some time I have to agree with her. It's what I want. It helps that she wants it too. For me, it's about the surrender & sacrifice to please her.

 

Pretty sure the first time we tried it was when I was traveling for business and she was worried that I would be cheating on her. (I wasn't, but I had in the past, and where I was headed brought up some bad memories and fears for her.) So I suggested a chastity cage as a way she wouldn't have to worry about me being away, and that part worked really well. What I wasn't expecting (without being able to jack off 3x every day) was that I would become so vulnerable to her. She quite liked that. And I quite enjoyed it myself, despite feeling a bit embarrassed about the extent of my complete collapse into submissiveness. I had basically never gone that long without an orgasm. We've been slowly experimenting ever since. The playing field continues to tilt more and more against me, and I couldn't be happier.

 

I have internalized some guilt feelings about sex, particularly masturbation. By locking myself up, with the help of Chaster, I can satisfy that part of me that needs to suffer for being a horny boy. With the chastity device I have, my boy-parts are safe, both from myself and from the world.