How does your key holder get you back in subspace after an authorized release?

My Wife(KH) knows the big "drop" I have when she allows me to have a orgasm and she doesn't like it at all. If I get to have a orgasm, she doesn't allow me to wait a day or two to put my cage back on. It's right back to being locked and when it's locked she will tease me and give my balls a good suck to get me back in the mood. It brings me right back to being horny again, knowing it will be a while before my next chance to have a orgasm.

 

This has been my experience too but I don't think I have enough data yet to report because I've had so few orgasms this year. My theory is the more teasing soon after an orgasm, the less the affect will be noticed. I hate to mention this to my wife because I think she believes she can ignore me for a few days after an O and I don't want to burden her. Any one else notce this with heavy teasing after an O?

 

My wife has the same routine. She loves to make me come, and I have no choice as she’s in charge. But she doesn’t like any sub-drop so I have to be back in my cage no more that 30mins after an ejaculation. She will wash and dry me and supervise the cage going back on when she then inserts and tightens the security screw, all the time telling me what a good boy I’ve been and how happy I’ve made her. It works a treat, and within an hour she can get her cage nice and full again with the slightest amount of teasing! Then to make sure I’m reset I get teased for at least 10mins the following morning before I get up to make her coffee.

 

Your ideas all seem great. My cage got tight think of Mistress and I doing those things. I would add bondage to the mix. She can put the cage right back on after release even if you aren't in subspace

 

When we first started MC and me wearing a cage, my Wife(KH) would allow me to have a orgasm once a month. Now after 4 years of MC, I don't get many orgasms. This year so far I have had two. My Wife(KH) did some research and found out males don't need to have orgasms, so now if she wants me to have one, she will allow me to masturbate for her. I get 45 seconds to cum and if I don't...Tough luck, the cage goes back on, and I wait until she wants to have me try again. My Last orgasm in May took about 20 seconds and I felt like crap after. I now don't really enjoy it much anymore, and my Wife(KH) loves it that way...

 

how does she milk you? Does she stop right before you spurt so that it is a real milking and not a prostate orgasm?

 

She sometimes does it herself. She always stops before I get to prostate orgasm.

Sometimes it's her or me doing it with prostate massage toys or one of our cock toys.

She decides when and how. I have been allowed to prostate orgasm with toy's. She always stops so far on my getting a multiple prostate event. I so much dream of that.

 

Wouldn't you feel better if you.got to take the time or if she gave you an orgasm?

I feel like male chastity works by dangling a carrot. But if onece you get the carrot it taste like crap then the motivation to pull the cart would wane

 

Edging after an orgasm helps. You need to ha a rest first for 10-30 munites then edging session

 

That's interesting! I never heard of this. But it sounds like the teasing sessions I proposed but in a much shorter time frame. Has anyone else tried this?

 

I really don't like the "drop" after a orgasm and my Wife(KH) doesn't like waiting for me to get back in the "mood". For me, a orgasm is 10 seconds of pleasure. My Wife(KH) enjoys teasing me, bringing me to the edge and leaving me wanting more, and she knows that works best for her. She has taught me that this way is the best for both of us...

 

Thank you. That is fascinating.
Taught or trained you to accept?

I like both. That drop after an orgasm for me is a feeling of satisfaction. But I am new to this lifestyle so I may change.

.....but I really really love an orgasm that sounds hard to give up.

 

Same here. Although I've never had an interest in cuming, even before meeting @MissAmy.

 

Taught or trained...A little of both...Sometimes my Wife(KH) will give me a choice of a orgasm or not...I turn it down, knowing that she really doesn't want me to have one.

 

This is the exact issue that I have with my own submission. The post orgasm drop feels hormonal and unavoidable--and my wife notices my submission/courtship wane like a wilted flower.

I have been working hard to hide this drop in all around desire/submission. I am by no means good at it. On top of that, She rightfully recalls when I was bad at it. She expects turbulence which means she gives me space.

I often wish she would hold the reins tight after a drop, but I have come to see that maintaining my courtship is my responsibility not hers. She has so much on her plate as it is, if I don't make it easy or fun for her to take the lead then she appropriately applies her energy elsewhere.

This is something I desperately want to address, she wants my orgasms and submission. I want to give her both. While we haven't had time to practice most the following, I have had some thoughts that might add to the discussion:

1. I orgasm first - a true role reversal for us. But then I spend an hour (or some time) focusing on her and her pleasure to get the little guy back in the game -- ending with the first in the new series of denial.
2. Use some couples counseling techniques during the drop. Basically lots of communication. Instead of quietly trying to power through and be submissive, say "I am feeling xyz about this right now.". Trust that she will be better off always with realtime information than a mix bag of submission. Communicating how I am feeling, that stuff works! Very hard to do though when I am just trying to be good.
3. Remove any negative connotation of me orgasming. I would beat my self up with disappointment after breaking a streak --taking myself and mood out of the game unnecessarily. I think I didn't like the feeling of the drop, but when I orgasm she almost always wanted me too, so it's not up to me to be disappointed. I have done this and the drops are much more manageable. I asked her to help with this also, she agreed that getting my submissive edge back sooner is preferable to her than punishing me over an orgasm-thar she wanted.
4. Submit to her the next evening by being fun, doing fun things we both like. Nothing crazy, stuff like scheduling a movie and popcorn with her, draw a bath and foot rub, play a card game. Things we both like that arent made better by me dripping with desire.
5. If I need space, communicate that and then work on a project that betters her household. Something like, "I am sorry, but I am feeling off and might better serve you fixing this or paying the bills tonight.

In the end my wife want to have fun and for me to have fun and be consistent and not keep her guessing. Now I just need to put the above into practice and see where this FLR will go!

 

This is fascinating to me, I have only had a day or a week in chastity this is the longest for me 30 days. She offered an orgasm to me but I turned her down, i did not want loose the physical frustration. Is that the drop?

 

I would think she might want to consider doing all she want to do when she wants to do it but edge you without release more often and leaving you frustrated that way for longer periods.

If she milks you first or encourages much leakage (a similar thing my first ex and I eventually learned) she will also be able to play with you for much longer without you being able to release.

Doing something very similar to that worked for one of my past partners and I for a very long time.. often eventually culminating in dry orgasms which usually left me feeling both exhausted drained and very horny

 

When someone is "milked" will it come with a.prostate orgasm or just leak out?

 

You will just dribble.

 

So if some has a prostate orgasm you'll shoot like a normal one?

How pleasurable is a milking?

 

it depends. If done gently it is quite relaxing. If done with more force than you want, it can be very unpleasant. I had a mistress many years ago who would milk me when asked but always made me regret it.

 

Well that is a mean mistress!

 

Prostate orgasm is different and don't get the typical drop. The discharge is variable at least for me. I have never really spurted like a penis orgasm.

Mine has been more of a flowing event.

 

It has a certain pleasure level but developed strong need to pee sensations.