Hey everyone, I’d be interested in getting some thoughts from you all. I am a newbie to chastity and am on my 15th locked up day today. I am so frustrated and actually had a dream about cumming last night! My wife and I have played before but last time I gave up and my wife didn’t want to do it anymore as I had let her down! Finally, after the Easter break, she told me I was going back into lock up for my return to work! I was so excited, I jumped at the chance and before I knew it I was all scrunched inside my wife’s holy trainer. Problem is, I was talking with her last night and realised that we hadn’t agreed an unlock date or time limit. I brought this up and her reply was “you should of thought about that before I locked you in”. I then pushed further and she said “you are giving me the best orgasms of my life while being locked up, I really see no need for you to orgasm or cum so shut up”! I know that if I used the safe word then she would unlock me but she probably won’t lock me again. I also know that I am happier than anything with our arrangement and trust my wife completely. So, sorry for the long post but do you all think I should be allowed a date to cum or should I shut up and do as my wife says?
Well you seemed so excited when she relocked her property. So enjoy your fate, if She never allows you to cum again that's her call. So yes shut up, MistressS
It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. It's up to your wife to decide. I assume it was your idea to "play chastity", I only say this because it's normally the bloke who initiates it. Well, your wife is well and truly in to it now so you have what you wanted! Just enjoy it, both of you!
i think you shouldnt set a a date its up to her to decide, you could ask for a time to be unlocke but just to be allowed and erection without cumming
Well, I think that you should have a hope to cum again someday ;-) But don't push her about that. I think that once a month would be a reasonable frequence ...
Think yourself lucky! having no expiration dates makes it really serious. Hard but serious and therefore exciting. I would love to go back to that feeling, when you go "beyond" what you think is the limit.
Well She is right. You transferred control of your sexual releases to her. So follow her lead. Plus, not knowing if or when you might get to cum, will only increase the sub feelings you have. That way if you do get a chance you'll greatly appreciate it.
I think that no expiration date is too much for him. He is sort of newbie. She should increase the thrill step by step....
She seems to be happy with the arrangement. It is your job to make her happy and serve her. She is happy with you being in chastity and denied. So you have to allow her her way, and hope she will reward you at some point.
Once you have determined what exactly is the dynamic of your relationship you will be able to best answer your question yourself. And then that answer may or may not prove top be the one you wanted.
Chastity is kink play outside the bed. means that both of you should spend more time in it. How much the effort each of you will do, I think, the better chance things will evolve in a good way. A abandoned husband to chastity could dramatically setup big fails. A persistently bratty husband to wife will be a deterrent to go this way. I did so much mistakes in the past because I was immature with chastity. I have to gain back thrust from my wife to make her do it again. So to speak, the question about a long should be about a good understanding between your desire or fantasy and the reality. Both of you should understand that. So, I would tend to go easy one step at a time. Generally speaking, chastised male tend to get into their subspace if they got rewards or goal. This give responsability to the gf. It could be a huge deterrent! But, we all have to questions what is important in life. We have only one here. Chastity increase considerably the intimacy but needs investment.
It is completely up to your mistress I gave up your rights to her so sit back and enjoy the ride stop roping from the bottom
We started by having set lockup release dates, and it totally changes once you just give up total control and have zero expectations for anything involving her penis. It makes you truly become her sub when you don’t know if and when you might be granted an erection, and the thought of being allowed an orgasm becomes a fading thought.
All play asside, you two need to sit down and talk. A discussion needs to happen between the two of you outlining everything such as: -Rules of the dynamic -Lock up length. (Too much too quickly is a recipe for failure.) -Cleaning schedule -Emergency key location -Punishment for breaking the rules -Your hard limits -Her hard limits -If you have children, how are you going to keep this away from them (They do not need to know) -Who else will know about your lock up -How to ask for help if you are having problems -Scheduled weekly honest check ins with each other. Going into a new way of living without any discussion or new rules will lead to falure. Iso.
Thank you all for your replies. My Wife and I have spoken and I have been unlocked for a few days. If I behave then she may grant me an O
There is no point asking us. One, we are pretty much conditioned to say no. Two, only you and your wife can decide this. Our views are irrelevant. Good luck
Hehe -- that's me by night #2! Excellent. Well done. Now your purpose in life is to make sure that she loves the result so much that she'll want to do this all of the time! Sorry, not seeing the problem here. I'd suggest writing her a very nice note apologizing for your rude assumption, and acknowledging that she has the full discretion on this matter. (That's what I do, and my wife appreciates my honesty about what I realize that I did wrong, and my loving respect for her.) Also, as a surprise, buy her flowers, clean the kitchen and the bathrooms, and ask her what else you can do to make up for your misbehavior. Yeah, that's not the way it works. That's the way it works. It's ok. It's good to talk with others who can understand your struggles. We all struggle at times. It took me a while to accept that my wife had complete control on this topic. Now I gladly accept that. And I also gladly accept that she has complete control on every other topic as well. It wasn't easy, and occasionally it is still challenging (i.e. I am still learning, and I'm far from perfect). But what really matters is your relationship with her, not what any of us thinks or says. Wishing you the best on your journey. And thank you for reminding me how fortunate that I am.