Feeling locked and forgotten

So right but that is where CM helps when you get on here and realize it is all your locked emotional thoughts and you are not alone. Then your little cock twitches in your cage reminding you she still has the keys and you are still locked it helps ... Hang in there keep communicating and know you are helping to progress your own desires. Good luck

 

Most keyholders have no idea how little they actually have to do to keep us happy and mentally healthy. A pat on the cage when walking by, a taunt here and there that you are locked just like she wants. A text message to let you know how much she loves knowing that you are locked and at her mercy. It hurts sometimes when you feel that she can’t give you even 5 minutes a day when you are dealing with the discomfort of a cage 24/7.

 

This.

I've had this talk with my wife several times. It took her a while to get to the point of realizing how little she has to do to keep me in it. A comment. A pat. Rubbing her ass on me if I come up for a hug from behind. She still doesn't do things every day, she needs to be in the right mood too, but having that conversation several times has helped.

 

The realities of living a life in a cage are sometimes brushed off here. The fact is that it is not always sunshine and riding crops.

Sometimes it’s being sick, overworked, tired, upset, sad, worried, life doesn’t stop when she turns the key. To make this work, it’s imperative we remember that wearing the device isn’t conditional on outside variables. We wear it because it’s what we are supposed to do for her. And just because we are wearing it for her, doesn’t mean it is constantly on her mind. She knows, but it’s not actually a constant like it is with us.

Keeping your mind on the big picture is tough sometimes, but worth it.

 

I can relate.
my typical night is kids in bed by 8:45 with me putting them down. she's asleep by 9 or before i'm downstairs most nights. attempting to wake with a massage or foot rub is met with discouragement. I have been feeling discouraged lately like im wasting my life and relationship potential.

was hoping to have more intimacy and interaction bringing chastity into our marriage.
beginning to think she may have agreed to it as a way of placating my desire for more interaction.

 

For me it’s feeling needed that makes my life very complete, without that I couldn’t manage and luckily she knows that very well

 

I can relate but at the same time with life I don't want to overwhelm the wife with my needs after all she makes me go 24/7 but there are times I won't see her for 2 or 3 days because of work and our schedules. But I obey

 

I look at chastity captions to get me back in the right headspace. Imagine she is saying it to me. She's just too busy to remember, and that makes me feel forgotten sometimes

 

It's a natural human instinct to not want to feel overlooked or neglected. The cage can create another layer of loneliness. There's no real answer apart from platitudes. If it becomes an unbearable problem you need to discuss it with her. Good luck

 

Sorry to hear this, it's rough. Talk to her, find out why she's so tired.

 

My partner didn't even open me up for cleaning for 4 weeks. To forget?

 

I feel you. It's been a rough march so far. I can't remember the last time I was allowed to give my wife oral.

 

That is a tough feeling to overcome. I was feeling that was this week as well. I also wasn’t feeling very submissive, still don’t. It’s been seven days since we had sex and sometimes it takes me two weeks to fully get my head right. Not trying to make this about me but to show you that you are not alone in those feelings. They are hard feelings to suppress. You aren’t forgotten or alone, you just think about it all the time and she doesn’t.

 

If your partner makes zero effort, why make any effort yourself?

 

She must have been feeling the same as me. Lol
Very satisfying oral and strap on session for her last night.

Lesson: patience is a virtue.

 

I understand this one. I'm always ready to do whatever in the "taking care of her physical needs" department (with absolutely zero expectation of anything in return), but her libido is maybe 1/10 or 1/20 what I have, so she's pretty content with a few foot-rubs a day while she reads or watches a movie, plus a back massage to put her to sleep.

It used to bother me horribly, but I eventually reached a sub state that seems pretty permanent now, where I am just kept waiting -- you know, like the origin of the word "waiter" -- to do whatever she asks, sexual or (mostly) otherwise. So if she goes a week or so without any desire for an orgasm, that is simply the way it should be. I need and I get my quality time with her, and that keeps me going. It is an absolute pleasure to be hers. I am interested in her; I'm not interested in changing her.

 

Not a big fan of captions, but there is one that really stuck with me... something like "The moment you want out is when real chastity begins." This helps me get through those times @Nicoftime mentioned above. I'm constantly having to remind myself that chastity is not conditional based on outside pressures. It's our way of life even when it's not sexy.

 

You may be locked but never forgotten.

 

I get this too.
Dont communicate enough and yet dont want to overdo it as getting a vanilla woman into this is gradual.
Each morning I roll into her naked side and slightly push the tube against her side butt so she cant forget. But I havent had pussy since Christmas though she has promised me some soon.

 

Glad your happy. I wouldn't have the patience or desire the the other posters have. We have had the conversation and I confronted her about being forgotten as others have discussed. For us chastity has always been a non-starter as I don't get my needs met. Our visions of what is supposed to occur are too different.

 

Corrected #23 --
Wonderful post. When you've been in chastity for years you have to accept that it's not all teasing and oral worship. There are days and days and weeks of just locked. That's when you're chaste and your erection is suppressed and under her control, those are the weeks when you grow in your submission and accept that you're not like other men who have erections and masturbate and fuck their wives. She hasnt forgotten you're chaste, she's just living the life of a confident keyholding wife freed from service to your erection. Feeling forgotten is just a chaste guy struggling with acceptance of his submission, learning that his penis is not the center of her life.

 

The tipping point for me is this: I would be happy to go a lifetime and never cum again, if I knew it was important to her, and made her happy. If I knew it entertained her, brought her joy, made her laugh, or in any way pleased her, it would be enough. If we could agree that the priority in the marriage is to meet her needs, that her happiness is what I find rewarding, and that together, we follow the path that she wants to follow, with trust and confidence that I so wholly support that path, that it's all I want, and in turn she feels free to have, to do, to be, to take, to deny, and to enjoy anything she pleases, it would be enough.

Enough for two lifetimes. Let alone one.

If I thought she tolerated it, or did it just to humor me, or simply accepted the keys and forget because it never mattered to her, then that to me would be life unlived.

I would be willing to do anything, be anything, give anything, if I knew it made her happy, no questions asked, no hesitation, for the duration of my life. The only thing in return I need is to know. Not guess, not surise, not think, not imagine. To know she's happy. it's enough.