My man isn't wearing his cage

Good luck on solving this problem. It sounds like he wants to be caged and you certainly want it. So being decisive on your part is a logical next step. I would think a simple declaration that it is time to put your cage back on, and follow my lead or else, might work. If he professes he wants to be broken then you need to take the lead. Perhaps offering to trim and/or shave in him and then following with putting his cage on would work.

 

Breaking him, to me, is taking control and making him follow your rules and satisfy your needs first. He needs to realize that you are the most important thing in his life and serving you, to whatever degree is most comfortable for you, is what he should do.

 

In my opinion he wants you to assert yourself to the point of no return, things that will cement you as in charge forever.

It depends on what you two are into, but I would say taking that to another level.

It sounded like you were into punishment, crops etc. Well another level might be switching to a paddle and going further, where he is actually begging for your forgiveness (playing safe and with a certain amount of consent of course).

If he has an aversion to his ejaculate, forcing him to consume and light verbal humiliation about it would certainly add a relationship changer to the mix (which one of us eats cum,that’s right you do).

It could be that breaking could be as simple as extended time in chastity, a huge deadline, or verbal threats of never being worthy to be inside you again, he may have to earn it. It sounds like you have a full compliment of toys, he can watch you every night as he is stuck indefinitely or until he’s pleased you enough for a reprieve.

My personal my moment was a punishment session, it wasn’t a play session. We had a slight argument and I was about to sleep on the couch, and she ordered me back and to strip. I was in no mood but she insisted. She paddled my butt, reinforced her being in charge, and we went to bed with no hard feelings and I felt needed loved and looked after. She cared enough to not let me stomp off and sulk.

 

I would suggest that a man who asks his Domme to break him probably means that he wants his will broken. In other words he wants you to really take charge and not let him have a say about what is happening or about to happen.
Certainly enforce your will, insist that he does as you command or else. If he is not used to corporal punishment then restrain him and give him a good caning. Some subs may start to cry, nothing wrong with that but carry on with the number of strokes you decided on. When you have finished, then comfort him and let him see that you care but let him know that to avoid the same again he must obey you. Good luck.

 

Sounds like you need to talk with him more! My wife would say the same

 

This is a tough one - and answers here will run the gamut. From my perspective, if he has a lot of responsibility outside of the home, and is the typical Alpha male in public, at work, in the community, etc., he may want, even need, to hand over control of his sex life, sex organs and even his will in those matters, to you. He wants you to be 100% in charge, and not put up with his little detours. Break him to the cage like an equestrian breaks a horse to the bit and saddle. Opinions will vary, as others here are more universally subservient, and at the other end, some lock-up for a few hours before sex, to add some "juice" to that day's lovemaking. You'll find your groove!

Regarding your earlier question - I debated answering yesterday, but became distracted and didn't come back to it: Remind your man that a vast amount of thought, time and energy goes into masturbation and seeking his next orgasm (even if it's only a distraction for stress relief) when he's unlocked. He's better when he turns that control over to you - allowing him to focus on what needs to be done at work, and in the family. Remind him that you love him, know him, and understand him - you'll take care of what he needs and when he deserves a release. Remind him that he asked you to try this lifestyle, and that you have fallen in love with it - almost as much as him. It really has to be a heart-to-heart conversation to renegotiate your "do-over." And, yes - you're starting again, but from a higher rung on the ladder. Past efforts are not lost.

One locked man's opinion. I would love to have what you two have already achieved! Good luck!

 

Not only do you want that GoddessG, you both deserve and are entitled to it. You should, IMVHO, make sure that he knows that. This is his reality now, and he needs to know that. I am so pleased that it seems you have moved forward. I have my own incredible Goddess, but there are many men on this site who are envious of him, having a Goddess like you to serve. Make sure he kno0ws what an honour it is for him to serve you.

 

Life happens and if its serious keep him out. I'm the same way with my wife. I was out most of the summer. We didn't talk about it much at all. However, I am locked now. With us it goes in cycles but I have noticed the more we do chastity the more frequent and easier it gets for both of us. Hope this helps somewhat for you.

 

Great advice, it can't be wrong if it comes from you. I'm not sure where corporal punishment fits into your routine, but as you mentioned ball slapping I assume it fits in somewhere? My guess is by being broken he means taking this further than he is comfortable with. For me this is probably the most submissive experience. As the sub you fear it and don't want it. You have a fight or flight reaction and you have to force it away and continue to accept the punishment being delivered. That is the only time I have felt broken and ironically also the most loved. On the other hand if you are more of a sensual dom it could be prolonged edging beyond anything he's ever experienced. Bottom line let it flow from yourself, not his likes/dislikes and have confidence to push boundaries substantially.

 

If you're still having trouble getting him back in, get some handcuffs (from the web) and quickly place them on one wrist. Tell him they come off when he locks back up. He won't go to work with handcuffs on a wrist.

 

Send him a welcome home card with the key sellotaped inside with a little note saying your looking forward to having him back where he belongs all the best x

 

If you are looking for a way to break your husband this was posted by @JuneChas (i think this would scare most men)Hello everyone,

Anyone that has been following my posts knows that I look for was to really punish my painslut husband. Over the past few weeks we have been getting a lot of use out of our humbler. I have been trying new ways for punishing with this since the balls are so sensitive. He was particularly bad a few weeks ago and I had to think of something new for punishment.

I mentioned before that I like the humbler when pegging him and tugging on it while we "play" but here are some things that really would have brought him to his knees (if he could with this device on).

Having him bent over with his balls exposed is very submissive, especially when I have him restrained other ways in addition to this. My favorite thing to punish him with is the riding crop in this position, it is precise and inflicts a lot of pain, I do not think I would ever use the cane on his balls like this because of the potential for damage, but who knows, I may do this in the future. I have bruised his ball sack, but trust me ladies, everything is fine on the inside, the skin is very sensitive. Do not be scared at the visual of bruising, it will heal. I have used some of our whips and slappers as well. Other times I use my hand and slap them over and over and get them a nice shade of red and throw a punch or two to switch things up (make sure you use the flat part of your fist and not knuckles). There are many possibilities here to where your imagination can take you and the color you desire your balls to be. I do HIGHL?Y recommend putting some lotion on his balls before impact play.

Second, we have a few electro shock units, while he is bent over, I have attached pads to each of his balls and punished him this way. Trust me, if you have this on high on his balls and leave him there for 30 minutes or more, he will seriously think twice about doing what he did wrong again. I find not reason to increase the power each time, he usually gets it full strength. When feeling more discipline is needed, I may cane his ass while he is receiving his therapy.

Other things in my evil mind that I want to try soon with the humbler are:

1. Waxing
2. Attaching as many clothes pegs to his balls as I can and whipping them off, I heard that is very painful
3. Make him service me while wearing the humbler

Anyone have any other ideas of what we could do in the humbler?

~Junechas

 

Stress is a big thing and affects us both mentally and physically. You need to talk with him and find out exactly what on his mind. This isn't just about being caged, you can tell him that you still own his penis and one day it'll be back where it belongs. But if he's really stressed, then maybe a hug might work better

 

Who goes to bed at 2130 on a Saturday?

 

It has been known to happen in the Chaste household! We just like our bed and a good read.

 

We do frequently

 

If there really is a lot going on, you could give him a break; personally, you'd think he'd want the laser focus chastity can give.

I pushed back against my wife at the beginning of things. Said she wasn't teasing enough, not playing enough, etc. She told me, "Fine, but then this is over. If we're not doing it my way like you said, we're not doing it." Straightened me right out.

 

It appears, as if he wants your control. Yet, he seems conflicted about it. That is pretty normal. Giving yourself up, is a big decision, and he seems to be wrestling with it.

If, you decide to exert your control, then everything is on your terms. If he truly wants to be controlled, he needs to realize this.

Being “broken”, is what he wants. Maybe, but what do YOU want?

You may take him there, but at your own pace, if at all. You will let things develop and lead him as you grow into your confidence.

Remember, you are in a club of very, very special women. He is incredibly fortunate to have your care and love.

 

I find if I’m allowed an orgasm I find it difficult to get the motivation to put the cage back on. All the excitement drains out of me and I just don’t see the point.

After a couple of days I will put the cage back on though and offer the keys to my wife again.

Does he want you to put the cage on him?

Sounds like he is keen to continue the new relationship dynamic but wants you to take total control. He’s sounding bratty to me?

You could just tell him there’s no cuddles, no sharing your bed, etc until he’s caged agin?

Or get him upstairs for some ‘sexy fun’ and restrain him and replace the cage yourself.

good luck!

 

That’s early
Do you have children who wake up at 6am (OK so it was 6:15 today, my wife is having a lie in and I’m up with them...) every day no matter what time they go to bed?