The L in FLR

To be honest I didn't intend for this thread to be about me and my relationship. The comments sort of took it that way. I wanted this to be about the L in FLR. Not just my FLR, but everyone's. I've expounded on leadership so let me turn this around in a role where I am a leader. In my construction company I preach a mantra of quality over production. I expect my employees to remember this without me constantly saying it over and over again. If someone needs constant supervision, they are not of much use to me. My best followers are the ones that require the least oversight and correction. So in theory the same should hold true in a sub/dom relationship. The best subs should require the least correction and motivation to properly serve and stay on the straight and narrow. This is why I understand I'm not being a great sub. At the same time the best employees need to be recognized for their contribution and even they need to be monitored and corrected from time to time. Even the best sub can't have a FLR without the L.

I appreciate the positive message, however I'm actually close to one of my spin outs. I told her I'm ready to be submissive when you're ready to be dominant. So when you're ready, tell me to lock up and I will. That was almost a week ago and she has done absolutely nothing dominant whatsoever. She's not even making me do the domestic service she loves so much.

 

Interesting development happened in this department. I came back to the office yesterday to find a 5 1/2 page FLR contract on my desk. I read it with great interest and found that everything she was expecting of me was no problem at all. All stuff I do anyway. Her before me, domestic service, sexual pleasure for her, lock-ups for me. The contract also outlined stuff she would do and again I thought great. As I read it and re-read it though I began to wonder if this was a good thing for her. I realized after reading it closely she was just cutting and pasting stuff off the internet. Was she really prepared for this? Is this what she wanted? Was it my place to question her?

So I wrote a note and put it on the contract and put it back on her desk. My note said the following -

1. I want to do what makes you happy and whatever you tell me to do. If you tell me to sign this I will do so without reservations.

2. I am happy to comply with all of the requirements laid on me in this contract with or without the contract.

3. I am concerned you might be setting yourself up for failure with this specific contract. If you're willing to listen I'd like to explain this further. If not, I'll sign as is.

So she decides to talk to me and I explain my points where I think she's setting herself up to be inconsistent and how that affects me. I suggest she re-visit certain sections and reconsider how she words things. It was a very good and healthy discussion and she decided to re-think the contract, but that she wanted me to start serving again now. I've been locked up for a week, but no FLR and no service, just locked. So I say what like just throw a switch and we go? She tells me to lock the office door and strip. She then has me come and stand in front of her and spread my legs. She then proceeds to slap my balls repeatedly. Not little love taps, but hard whacks. If I flinch or pull away she tells me sternly to stand still and take it. After a particularly hard smack she asks if I've had enough and I say Yes Mistress. Wrong answer she replies and starts again. After a few more whacks she asks me what's the right answer. This time I get it right and say whatever you decide Mistress. So she has me kiss her feet and then get dressed and unlock the office.

We'll see what happens next. Not sure if she'll come back with a contract or not. Hopefully we can make it last. I want to believe this is different this time.

 

I couldn't agree more and I talk about my spin out, when the reality is a mutual spin out. I'm not sure how your husband approaches you with this, however I am the communicator in our relationship as you are in yours. Before chastity or FLR's I was always the one that wanted to discuss things. Analyze the problem, look for solutions. I believe firmly that the domme has the harder of the two jobs. It requires more creative thought and energy. That's one of the reasons the subs service is so important. If I can free my wife from say 10 hours of work a week, hopefully she can focus some of that savings into her role as the dominant. I've always approached the discussions with her with the greatest respect because of this.

I'll give you an example though of what I'm talking about. At one point during the week she had me give her an orgasm using my tongue and her toys. Afterwards as we are cuddling and going to sleep she says to me "tomorrow things are going to change, tomorrow we are going to whip you back into shape". So the next day I'm walking on pins and needles. Doing everything I can to be as good to her as possible. Keeping my mouth shut waiting for something to happen. Then as the day slips away and I realize she has either forgotten or doesn't care enough to see it through I get depressed.

My wife has a long history of doing this. We are going to do ____. Then we never do ____. She forgets she ever said we were going to do ____. If she came to me and said "You're being a sulky little bitch and I'm not going to have anything to do with you until you snap out of it". I'd be good with that. Just tuning out though starts our death spiral.

Anyway this is kind of a bleak post given how well things are going. No revised contract, but I have resumed my service. yesterday I woke her from her nap too early by mistake. When I saw her later she told me to put 5 strokes on my punishment list for my mistake. She seems to finally be jumping back into the Mistress role after a little over a week of lock up. Who knows, maybe it was her idea of a test?