What have you learned? Any surprises?

Apart from enjoying being horny without relief,what has absolutely surprised me is the chemicaly induced change in my behavior! Being cooperative,calm,submissive,willing to serve,etc.,etc.,!

 

My biggest surprise was how many surprises it brings. Like how she has taken to it, like how I thought it would be a game for a few hours or days, like how excited I am that it keeps happening, like how incredibly close we have become, and like Masohedo says, how willing I am to serve.
Probably the biggest surprise has been the associated kinks: panties, pegging, and punishment were all things that only happened in porn a few months ago, but are now part of my life.
What a journey it is!

 

I have learned I can be more attentive to her wants and needs. Which in turn fuels my wants and desires. The connection and communication it has brought to our relationship is incredible!! I would have never thought it was possible.

 

I've seen others on here go a year or more with no orgasm. I never thought I could. I've learned that with the right attention it's possible. I'm only four weeks in so far. We have no set date for me to have an orgasm. She has a few dates picked out but hasn't pinned one down.just to keep me guessing.

 

This has literally changed my life. For some reason I've never understood all the things my wife said. I listened and heard, but never truly understood. I've only been locked 4 days straight and we spent all weekend talking in bed about what I've done to her and how neglectful I was to her and my kids and myself. Now that I know I vow to change not just for her, but for myself. I was able to open up to her about a weakness in my past I've never told anyone. She opened up to me too. For me it's only been a few days, but it is already life changing. I was hoping for some sexual changes, but never expected the extent I would become aware that is nonsexual...

 

Surprises... that she is as willing to keep me in chastity as she is, That she is researching being a keyholder, that when we go to a toy store she searches out devices to see what they have.
What I’ve learned... that it only takes me a couple minutes to make the bed everyday, that I look forward to waiting for her at the edge of the bed to pull the sheets back for her then to tuck her in and make sure she’s comfortable, that I love kissing her bare ass every morning before she gets dressed, that my orgasm doesn’t matter and she will let me have one when She says it’s needed, that when I feel my device, I think of her. And that she is in control.

 

That the longer I go without an O, the less that seems to bother me.

 

What I've learned is how ... flexible ... my inhibitions come the longer I'm locked up.

Some things I would never have been willing to do before become "thinking about it" after a couple weeks, "well, maybe" after a few more all the way to "anything she wants so long as I can cum!" after a couple months.

Also how regular a kink like this can become in daily life. It seems trite to say, but I really do feel odd if I'm not in the cage.

 

Learned and surprised:

• The impact of chastity and denail to my "chemicals", which helps me to explain my changed behaviour
• The increased level of initimacy and "good discussions" since 2 decades with my Love
• The fact that I am absolutely not looking forward anymore to orgasm
• Learned about the difference of "well feeling for 1 minute after an Orgasm" and "feel incredible for days after a T&D session without orgasm"
• That I've learned to please and treat my Love I did never before (she likes the foot pampering before sleep very much…)
• To be patient rather than "pushing my own idea's"....I got the feeling we are not even half way yet…
• Talk about feelings without feeling hampered
• Boosting my energy much more than ever expected
• ….so many more

 

Surprises:

-That I didn't think to play with self-denial when I was single. I've always been into BDSM and it seems chastity and orgasm denial would be a no-brainer next step? Apparently it is not. LOL

-That my wife (who is into BDSM because of me but has come to love slapping me around and is the one who starts our scenes and has taken the reigns of our FLR) "GOT" my need for control and denial and how quickly she made it her own. I knew she'd play but I didn't expect her to understand it, enjoy it, and crave it like she does. She once told me I created a monster...

-That I would need patience for anything other than having an orgasm (but I think that's more the FLR side of things).

-That my wife wouldn't be horny 24/7 like I am.

-That I would need to learn to control my emotions and urges and not be a raving lunatic all of the time.

-How much I would leak?!


It's funny....there was no build-up to me telling my wife about my desires. Like I said, we play, so I wasn't worried about being judged or anything. I don't even know why I told her. We were laying in bed, probably half-asleep, and I just blurted it out. Now here we are half a year later and I'm in the middle of a denial session with no set release date in sight. What?! When we started she could barely let me wait two days because she felt guilty! The quickness at which this is all happening is surprising, too! It's fantastic.

 

Ive learnt just how deep my need to submit and please goes, and how far I am willing to have my limits pushed and moved.

 

I have learned to stretch and grow as a person and partner. I focus my energies onto pleasing M instead of myself and that has brought me a level of joy and happiness I have never experienced before.

I have learned to trust in M completely and know that she will take me places that might be uncomfortable, scary, embarrassing, ot humiliating but always with her underlying love and care for me.

I have learned what a joy it is to give up control and submit to M with my whole being. It is a wonderful thing though the daily trials may be challenging at times.

 

I remember when at the vanilla time I licked my Wife's pussy fast and it was not very exciting to me because I wanted to put my cock into her as soon as possible. Now when I do not fuck her for long weeks or months oral sex is so much awaited. My Wife allows me for that once a week on average. Yesterday evening I could do it and I was so happy licking her sweet pussy, and wanted to do it longer and longer. I am really surprised how wonderful pleasing my wife with tongue could be and how fantastic it is when I can do it after days of wating even having in mind that the whole sex is for her pleasure only and after her orgasm my role is over and I will have to stay sexually frustrated but happy that I made my Queen satisfied.

 

Myself!