What are your rules?

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by laerenielwen, Jul 3, 2020.

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  1. laerenielwen
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    laerenielwen Member

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    Every partnership is different.

    My sub loves chastity, but has difficulty wrapping his head around the idea of 24/7 lock up even though he loves the idea of it.

    I'd be interested to hear what your rules are in your relationship (24/7 or not).
     
  2. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    One rule. Lady C decides
     
  3. laerenielwen
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    laerenielwen Member

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    So you have no boundaries or hard limits? Anything goes?
     
  4. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    Not quite. We worked our way through a list of things that we agreed there would be no limits on, things that needed both our input and, of course, we already know our hard limits as far as kink and sex go.

    But back in the day when I had a tendency to top from the bottom Lady C spat the dummy out and it was going to be her way or not at all.
     
  5. Tessasissy
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    Tessasissy New member

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    The main rules of chastity for us are:

    1) I am not to ever bring up the subject of chastity, it is up to my wife if she wishes to discuss it (only exceptions are injury or cleaning)

    2) I am never to ask for release from chastity or to ask for an orgasm. If I am released for any time or given an orgasm it is entirely up to my wife.(there is no set lenght of time)

    Currently. The time between orgasm is increasing and I have no say and am not alowed to comment. It is now 69 days since my last orgasm with no way of knowing when I will next be allowed one. My prevouse lock up was 71 days.
     
  6. Braddogg4345
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    Braddogg4345 Happily Owned by a Goddess

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    I am locked 24/7 for the most part. My Goddess may give me 1 or 2 days a month with no cage.
     
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  7. madams-sissysub
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    same here! Madams word is law!
     
  8. Cecilia B
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    Cecilia B Active member

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    We aren't full time, although once the lock on his cage snaps shut, I'm the Boss Lady. I had him make 2 plaques he has to hang up when he's in chastity or under discipline.

    One says:

    Miss Cecilia wears the pants. Miss Cecilia makes the Rules.
    Priscilla Prettypanties wears the panties. Priscilla Prettypanties obeys the Rules.

    the other one says:

    Miss Cecilia has the vagina. Miss Cecilia makes the Rules.
    Priscilla Prettypanties has the penis. Priscilla Prettypanties obeys the Rules.

    When he's in Chastity or under Discipline, he has to

    1. address me as "Ma'am" or "Miss Cecilia".
    2. put the toilet seat down. (It's his house, he never had to put it down in his parents' house, so he won't do it in his house. I did get to make it a Rule, though, when he's under Discipline or in Chastity)
    3. ask permission to do things like leave my presence,, leave the table, go out somewhere (even if I'm at work)
    4. When he's not under discipline or in Chastity, if he wants sexual delight, all he has to do is ask. If he's under Discipline or in Chastity, he's not allowed to ask.

    I have some Rules for even when he's not in Chastity or Under discipline. If he disobeys those Rules, he will be put under Discipline, in Chastity or both. Usually, I'll put him in Chastity if i can't discipline him right away., until I can schedule a Disciplinary Session. This also makes sure he has a full load, since he always ejaculates when I spank him OTK. I want him to eat a full load, at least the first time.

    1. His penis is My Property. I don't l;et anyone play with My Property. I am the only source of his sexual delight. I don't permit masturbation. Any time he wants anything sexual, , all he has to do is ask. N o matter how tired I am, how bad I feel, how busy I am, if he wants it, all he has to do is ask and he gets it. If he sees I'm tired or don't feel too good and wants to be a gentleman and not "bother" me, then he can be a gentteman all the way and not touch My Property..
    2. I don't allow pornography.
    3. If I see he's looked at pornography, I assume he's masturbated. He'll be disciplined for disobeying me on both.
    4. He has to be polite to my friends. He's not permitted to be obnoxious to them, even if they deserve it. He's allowed to come to me if they're being rude to him and ask me to get them to back off. I'll do that. If they don't back off, he can come back to me and I'll usually give him permission to speak his mind. I don't always give him permission, though. One of the penalties for disobeying me on that is the person or persons he was rude to get to witness the Disciplinary Session he earns for it.
    5. He has to open doors for me, house, cars, taxis, limousines, Uber, buildings.
    6. He has to carry packages when we're shopping (up to what he can carry, of course).
    7. If he sees me coming home and I have packages or a suitcase, he has to take them and open the door.


    I have more Rules, but these are what I can think of, now.
     
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  9. Sissycaitlin77
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    Sissycaitlin77 Active member

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    Miss Cecilia curtsey,

    I absolutely love your set of rules for in chastity and non in chastity very laid out and a excellent a example of rules I wouldn't mind following myself. Thank you for posting your set of rules for all of us to see.
     
  10. Fiber66
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    She can do whatever she wants with no boundaries or hard limits. But that is because I know and trust her enough to know that she will never do anything to actually harm me. this comes from years and years of marriage, and of playing roughly together. I do not have a safe word with her which is not recommended but for us we have the experience that one one is not needed. I do believe that if I repeated "Red" enough times she would stop. But again that is the trust. Officially I have surrendered my right to a safe word to her.

    We do live the lifestyle 24/7, but with our jobs we are not together 24/7 so it makes it harder to have set rules based on a schedule. For instance there are weeks were she works at an office locally and if that is the case I will prepare her clothes in the morning, have breakfast ready for her, have dinner ready when she returns, and bathe her.

    General rules are:

    -I may never use her name even in public without saying "Miss" in front of it. I always call her Miss, Mistress or Ma'am. Even then I use her name very sparingly. I usually just say Ma'am, Miss or Mistress. I would say I actually speak her first name less than once a week on average. Often times I actually call her by her last name. In addition I am not allowed to address anyone without saying Miss or Mister and I must say Ma'am and Sir as well. For instance if she introduced me to a man named Jake Wilson I would say "Hello Mister Wilson" and if he spoke to me I would end every sentence with Sir.This includes random people like sales associates. Like if someone checks us out at the store I say "Thank You Ma'am".

    -She is always right.

    -I may never leave the room without asking her permission

    -I may never wear mens clothing. I do not own any male clothing. Most of what I own is "drab" basically female clothing that could pass as mens like jeans and khaki pants. I have a few women's pant suits and such. Our favorite TV show ever is the episode of The Office (US version) where Michael wears the womans suit. I cannot refuse if she decides to tell me what to wear.

    -I may never sit on any furniture in the house while she is home and may never ask permission to do so. She does let me sometimes but only if she wants it for some reason. I have a few dog type pillow beds and pillows around the house to kneel/lay/sit on. This includes her bed. When she is not home I am allowed to sit in one chair in the living room. I sleep on a large cushion on the floor in a spare room when she is not home.

    -I am not allowed to spend any money without her permission. I have access to a credit card with a very low limit. She keeps a bank card in a safe that I do not have access to in case of emergencies though. I could call her for the combo if needed.

    -I am not allowed to eat any meat other than fish. I am only allowed to drink alcohol in her presence if she directs me to. I am not allowed to ask for permission either. I can drink when she is not home.

    -I must keep my toenails painted at all times. She will occasionally rotate the colors but I use whatever was last given to me. Sometimes I go for a full mani pedi but usually I do them at home.

    -I am not allowed any body hair except on top of my head.

    -I must workout 5 days a week for an hour a day

    -I may not drive anywhere without her permission. When she is home she drives everywhere.

    -When we go out I carry her purse and any other bag she has or gets.

    -In public I must walk three steps behind her and to her left. I am not supposed to speak unless spoken to, but that is a harder rule to follow and so a lot of leeway is given there. There are times I have to say something. So it is kind of a speak only when absolutely necessary rule.

    -I must always wear nylons

    -I must always wear a collar of some sort. I have a nice metal low profile one she gave to me but sometimes that is switched out for more strict metal or leather ones for play.

    We have more rules depending on the situation. For instance we play at swingers clubs and BDSM dungeons and so I have rules about how to act in those settings and who I may interact with. We also have a long list of "positions" I am to be in if she commands. for instance position 1 is me kneeling, back straight, facing the nearest corner, hands behind my back left hand holding right wrist (if they are not already shackled together) eyes open head up. Position two is exactly the same but head down. 3 is the same as 1 but eyes closed, 4 is the same a two but eyes closed, 5 is the same as 1 but I am allowed to sit back on my heels. Typically this will be longer term. And on and on. We have 42 positions in total. No matter where or when she can say "position 14" and I will immediately move to assume that position. In addition we have 107 clothing/bondage configurations for me. Outfit 1 is whatever I was wearing that day with no bondage items other than the metal collar I wear normally. Outfit two is the same with leather wrist cuffs. Outfit three adds leather ankle cuffs.

    Other things of interest are that I am in chastity 24/7 and have been for years. It is only removed at the doctors office for my annual checkup. I also took her name. Originally when we married she took mine, but we decided to change that. She went back to her maiden name and I legally changed my name to hers. I also changed my first name to an mostly female, but somewhat androgynous name. Think "chris" but even more rare for a male to have. Also we do not hide our relationship from anyone. The only family I keep in contact with is my sister and she is fully aware of our dynamic. We do not talk in detail about sex habits of course.

    The sum of all of it though is she is always right and I live only to serve her. Whatever she says is my law.
     
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  11. MRS.Lilith
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    Our list of rules is pretty simple, as we like it.

    1) I decide when, where, if and how my sub gets to cum.
    2) I can keep him chaste indefinitely if I so desire, he is not allowed to ask or nag me to change this
    3) He is to give me a full body massage daily, emergencies and sickness exepted.
    4) For whatever my sub does for me, he is not to expect reprocriation unless I decide he pleased me enough to be allowed something he wants
    5) He is to obey my orders in the bedroom at all times, unless he needs to use a safeword
    6) I decide what we do on the days we are without the children, the schedule is set to my pace and I decide on any outings, holidays and fun things we might do
    7) He is not allowed to watch porn unless it's erotic literature or hentai
    8) He is not allowed to masturbate or touch my property without permission
    9) As stated above, the penis is my property. I decide what happens to it.
    10) He is edged twice a day, no other sexual act is guaranteed . I decide when we do more, and how.
     
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  12. Crowe
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    Crowe Member

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    Very simple... Caged 24/7, except when she wants sex, then it's no cumming for me, then back in the cage. Occasionally she give me an afternoon of freedom while I'm doing yardwork and swimming. There is no set schedule for any orgasms on my part.
     
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  13. Darlydixon
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    Darlydixon hornyman

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    We have very simple basic rules do house chores don't bring up the devise and 24/7 lock up
     
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  14. laerenielwen
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    laerenielwen Member

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    Thank you all so much for sharing the unique rules for your relationships!

    So my partner and I do not live together at this time. He is also studying to take the MCAT in two months so work and studying are his life. We are also practicing ethical non-monogamy. Our current rules reflect these parts of our life together as well the fact that he and I are very new to chastity and FLR. Giving up control is difficult for him (alfa in the 'real world) and I am much more a fan of 'positive reinforcement' conditioning than 'brute force' conditioning.

    My rules are:



    1. Always locked in my presence public and private. May unlock only for biking (chosen exercise) and if needed to concentrate on studying.
    2. Safeword to stop all chastity 100% (non negotiable)
    3. At least one day/night of the week for us (flexible in terms of duration and date to fit around responsibilities).
    4. Good morning and good night message.
    5. May cum whenever he likes while locked up. Otherwise no orgasms/cumming.
    6. May communicate with whomever he'd like online or otherwise. If he wishes to go on a date with someone, he will tell me before it happens (I don't need details) and he will be locked up for it.
    7. Boundaries with others:
    - Open and honest, if something moves beyond just a date to something physical, it must clearly be explained to that person the dynamic as to not cause anyone any hurt/pain. This is important to me as I do not like the idea of a person being upset after finding out later down the road and that choice being taken from them.
    - As he will be locked, sex involving his penis won't be happening, but on the off chance I allow it, protection is a must, non negotiable. I don't have any interest at this time in persuing others, but I would follow this rule as well if that changed.

    I see these changing over time as life for us changes but they are a good starting point for us now.
     
  15. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Active member

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    My wife and I have an agreement, but most of it is common sense.
     
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  16. Ormaz
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    Ormaz Member

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    Funny. Who wrote this?
     
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  17. JackStrap
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    JackStrap Member

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    Whoa. That raised my eyebrows :) What I mindf**k!
     
  18. Ormaz
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    Ormaz Member

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    If only you knew how right you are! It sounds to me like yet another dude fantasizing aloud. :D
     
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  19. MRS.Lilith
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    Do you get off on telling everyone they are writing fantasy and not truth on this board or something? It seems to be the only thing you contribute :rolleyes:
     
  20. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Active member

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    Some people on this site are full of it but everyone's situation is different.
     
  21. MRS.Lilith
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    I posted this because the member quoted said something of the sort on almost every thread. And while I agree that some content here may be less quality than the other, I rarely find someone's account to surely be fiction.
     
  22. Ormaz
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    Look, I, like everyone, am not against fiction. Some guys may enjoy that, but it needs to be clearly identified. This is a forum, not a dating site. I only object to the offering of wank fodder, in the guise of advice, by people posing as what they are not. I, for one, certainly don't get off trying to pass for what I am not. I care very little to see this forum go back to the time when all questions about chastity were answered with FLR as a prerequisite, all questions about cages were met with piercing as a prerequisite, “you are not in chastity unless you are in a FLR relationship, you are not a in a cage until you are pierced”. That got boring very quickly. When people with legitimate inquiries are greeted with this kind of nonsense, they get quickly discouraged, and leave, thinking chastity is some kind of chimera that can’t be unachieved, which it can. I’d rather the pretenders left.
     
  23. MRS.Lilith
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    Okay, this is a very reasonable post. I give you that. I agree with most of it too, but then I have to ask why be so focussed on it? You have posted about that a lot, and much less quality contributions like this post. I can see that you have potential to be a great contributer though trough this.

    But I mean ofc there are fakers here, but it's not like the place is run by them. Why not focus on what the site can give you, and ignore the dumb stuff? Works for me.
     
  24. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Active member

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    I have always felt a need to call the extreme BS'er out due their behavior giving the overall resource a lack of credibility.
     
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  25. Blue00
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    Those are good and reasonable rules. It is likely time for me to rewrite my rules soon:


    1) I will surrender all of my private pleasure to her so that she can best build my desire
    2) I will always accept her desire to gift me pleasure
    3) I will put her pleasure and desires above my own.
    4) I will always respect her limits
    5) I will continue to remain faithful as I need only her
    6) *private*
    7) I will seek out ways to demonstrate my devotion and love.
    8) I will seek her advice on any future bedroom toys
    9) *private*
    10) *private*
    11) I will meditate and condition myself to be a better husband
    12) I will follow her lead in and outside the bedroom

    Sorry for that the ones marked *private* will not be shown. Please do not ask. I will not be able to tell you about those as they involve hypnotic triggers and conditioning.
     
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