The balancing of control and respect

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by tame tiger, Nov 29, 2021.

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  1. tame tiger
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    tame tiger New member

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    If recently been thinking of this lifestyle alot and trying to figure were my wife and I went wrong. We tried female led for awhile but I had to stop it when I felt the fun was turning into a lack of respect.

    One day she commanded me 'give me that' quite abruptly. Now this really turned me on I must admit but her town wasnt dominant it was almost with contempt.

    So please any tips on a successful FLR while maintaining her respect.
     
  2. Mojoman
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    Mojoman Long term member

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    You haven't given much information there, but here are my thoughts.

    Is it possible that she's not really naturally dominant and found it too much effort to be the woman you wanted, rather than the woman she is? Maybe it was never that much fun for her?

    Did it stop being fun because she wasn't dominating you in the way that you told her to do it?

    Are you certain that you can tell the difference between domination and contempt, just by the tone of her voice?

    It seems as if you stopped it, just because she wasn't doing it right?
     
  3. tame tiger
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    tame tiger New member

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    Me stopping wasnt because she wasnt doing it right as I said it really turned me on. Problem is at that moment I knew she wasnt enjoying the dynamic shift.

    You are right she isnt naturally dominant, so maybe I was asking for to much.
     
  4. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    Well according to the Official Handbook on FLR, it states.... just kidding.

    There are no rules on how a FLR is run.

    The both of you need to decide how your particular FLR is run.

    Lay out the ground work and foundation.

    Try it out for a week and then reconvene and see what worked, what did not work, what should be kept, changed and thrown away.

    Then repeat, repeat, repeat.

    All relationships are constantly evolving. An FLR is no different.

    Good Luck.

    Iso.
     
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  5. Queens servant73
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    Queens servant73 Long term member

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    Maybe she could just be your dominant as it pertains to your sex life. Our marriage has always been based as a team as far as every day life, and sexually I was the one to dominate her. Up until a couple years ago when we decided to try a swap and caged up the penis. Now she controls all decisions regarding sex, but our “normal” life is still based on team work. Now sometimes she’ll wield her power outside of sexual things, and will tease or threaten to get me to go along with her wants, but if it’s anything serious, she would hear me out like “normal”.
    So your FLR absolutely can be a trial and error thing, or tweaked to something that works for both of you. Obviously talking things out needs to be a constant in any relationship for it to work, so start there and talk about each other’s expectations, wants and desires and see what happens
     
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  6. enslavedbyc
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    enslavedbyc Junior Member

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    There are many many models for an FLR. A Queen has no reason to disrespect her Knight nor does a trainer dare show contempt for her pit bull. I am not submissive, she has the final say in a CNC relationship.

    If you both want an FLR find a model that works for you.
     
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