Hi, all, Recently joined after lurking for a few weeks and trying to learn all I can in the 3 months since GF and I started down this road. I guess we are a bit different than many in that this was actually her idea (just found out last week that it was a bit of a setup!), AND she wants "it" more often than me. Over the course of a great 6 year relationship we discovered that: 1) Cheap sex toys were not very exciting, 2) Real stuff from the hardware store was better, 3) She didn't like several BDSM positions whereas I liked most, and 4) When she put a padlock on me something wild happened (well, besides cuts and bruises). She smiled warmly when I happened on a picture of a steel cage the next day looking for something "safer". I was clueless. 3 months later the longest we have gone is 8 days, and no plans on extending that (um, unless I am still really naïve) Rather, she is experimenting with different methods of teasing, locking, etc. to "maximize" my performance. So I apologize that we are not into "real" (i.e. long term) chastity, but she is very clear that this is about her, not me. Which of course again turns me on. About the username: I'm an OCD "wannabe" (apologies to any real sufferers). My technical training and management job mean I am literally paid to not let emotions enter in to things. So why does a tiny cage change so much? It is not lack of sex as the "books" state. Within hours of being locked up (after plenty of sex) I become completely overwhelmed with emotions. I have to hold her, caress her, smell her hair, anything. When I caress her skin it is mine that tingles. When she gets aroused her breath intoxicates me. I am compelled to satisfy her in any way possible. I'm smitten worse than I can ever remember. Its driving me crazy. She loves it of course and only promises to make sure I never know what's coming next. Sorry to be so long winded, and hope we qualify to be here. Any and all advice welcome (especially if you can explain what is happening to me - just keep it secret from her ;-)
hi and welcome to the mansion, its wonderful isnt it? this feeling of someone having control over something so personal. You are indeed a lucky man to have found someone who not only is prepared to dabble into something spicy but is actively driving things further. Go with it and see where the journey takes you but most importantly remember to share it with your new found colleagues here. Enjoy.
hello and welcome. I hope you both continue to enjoy what certainly sounds like an intriguing journey.
The emotional side is also very real for me, I become more submissive and desparate to please in the hope of being granted some release, normaly I would be permitted one orgasm a month, unless my performance or attitude displeased my Mistress, then it would be put back another month, the longest I have had is two months which was very hard. I think this is normal for many in chastity so don't worry everyone has differant responses to things not just chastity but other things like pain or cross dressing, some like it others hate it. Just in case this helps you my response to severe pain doen't arrouse me physically, just the opposite, but psychologically I enjoy the submission and accepting the Mistresses punishment, also seem to be cleansed mentaly for a few days afterwards. Enjoy the journey and have fun, oh yes meeting real people in the scene is worthwhile at muches,parties and events.
There are no "rules" you must follow, and no chastity police looking after your shoulder to make sure you're doing it "right". So no need to apologize. The only 'guidelines' you might want to consider are to keep things safe, legal and consensual. Otherwise, do whatever the two of you want to do. It's nobody else's business but your own.
Thanks all for the encouraging words. BTW: turns out I am naive. No sooner did I post that intro than GF decided to push the timeframe. Yikes! If I get time I'll create a thread in Newbies so all of you with experience can get a good laugh at my expense!