First a little back ground about us l. We are rather new to chastity. We began out journey, truly, at the beginning of the year. My husband brought up the topic a while ago, we tried a few cages but mainly used it as foreplay. It has only been since the beginning of 2024 that we have taken the decision to pursue chastity lifestyle full time. I am new to the role, but I am learning as much as I can. This website has helped loads with that. i am enjoying the experience and I believe that it has brought us closer as a couple. We have been more affectionate towards each other. It has been nice to feel the new found confidence that I have developed from my new position. We have been going through lent where my husband has been having no orgasms at all through the period of lent. We have just started two new things tonight. During a bath we talk about all things on our mind about chastity. Almost like a little debrief at the end of the week to see how we are getting along. Normally it is against the rule to discuss it unless I bring it up, but during that time he is allowed to talk about it, ask any questions, while we are in the bath. Another thing we have started is maintenance spanking. This is straight after the bath to remind him of the rules, after he has been able to talk so openly just before. He gets one hit for each rule, which he has to recite from memory. It is hoped that with this he will remember the rules and not be inclined to break them. This is the first session tonight and we will see how this next week goes.
It sounds like you have got off to a good start both of you. The one thing which is good, is you are both talking and working out what you want in your lives. Carry on the good work and good luck in your new experiences.
As a person who gets spanked/flogged often my only advice would be if its meant as punishment, over time he may start to enjoy them. So eventually if it's that the intent it may not work for that purpose anymore. He may start ignoring or breaking rules to be "punished".
Temptress123, what are the rules? How often are you letting your guy cum? I know this is personal and you don't have to answer but how often are you coming? How often were each of you coming before? I know this is much more than about an orgasm but it will help me to understand my situation.
Sounds like a great start on the chastity journey. I'm sure that, as long as the open communication continues, you will find it wonderful for both of you! @Temptress123 , as you move deeper into the lifestyle, you will surely find subtle ways to humiliate and otherwise control your guy psychologically, without more physical things like spankings. Many of us subs have become so accustomed to this that a mere look from Mistress can let me know how She feels and what I need to do to correct the situation. Best wishes on your journey!
Great way to establish your new relationship and get him into the mindset. I'm a sub and masochist. Any pain my mistress gives me is just that, pain but with some kind of pleasure mixed with it but rarely ever just "having my cake and eating it" pleasure only... it always gets the point across who is in charge and what the rules are. I have to behave well or these punishments can be withdrawn in extreme circumstances like unauthorised masturbation, etc. Of course any sexual activity would be banned also.
Congratulations to both of you, and thank you for sharing. My wife and I are on a similar journey, with a two month later start. I suppose I should tell her about this site, so she can learn more as well.
Yeah. My husband told be about it. It is nice to have a place where you can get advice and share experience with like minded people.
Rules my Temptress has for me are - I cannot talk about chastity and how long it has been since my last orgasm. - I cannot use Temptress' title in public/ in front of the kids/ over text. - I cannot imply the initiation of sexual activities. - I cannot directly ask for sex/ when I will next cum. - All orders given to me must be obeyed. - Status of my emergency key can be checked at any time (lives in my wallet secured with a numbered plastic lock, Temptress has this number written down). - And if I don't accept a punishment it will be extended/multiple punishments used. We haven't had PIV since the 12th Feb, since this time she had granted me a prostate orgasm but no PIV. Temptress however orgasms as often as she desires which is most days.
A little update. We had our weekly debrief in the bath tonight. We didn't have much to talk about, only if we were still enjoying ourselves and if my husband needed to improve at anything. He has been really attentive this week. After we did our maintenance spanking as during the bath most of the rules are stopped to allow for open communication. So I have to remind him of the rules so that he doesn't slip up and forget. I treated myself to a new paddle for spanking as we have been using my brush ( flat side down). Also I said that my husband was to recite the rules from memory. After this I noticed that I didn't get much reaction during the spanking. I also didn't get the same thrill hearing him say the rules compared to last week when I read them out. I think it was more that I was telling him what he could and couldn't do. After I asked his opinion of the new paddle, in which he said it didn't sting as much as the brush. To test I told him to lay down again, hit him with the paddle then the brush. I saw him flinch and didn't even need to ask him which stung more. So I decided to continue using the brush as the spanking is to remind him of the rules and potentially punishment. He will still need to memorize the rules as I will spot check, but he isn't going to recite them to me. We will see what happens next week.
If you get a cane or a thick paddle there will be no worry about it not being a punishment. My misses and I have several toys that even using just minimal effort have a lot of sting or pain.
I am trying to write in this every week, so that I can look back over our journey to see how far we have gone. So last night was out weekly bath debrief. Again all rules were removed so we could both talk openly. This week I graced my husband with an PIV orgasm as it had been a while. After I learned that it had been 50 days (not that he was keeping track). He never mentioned how long it had been, so I don't mind him keeping track as long as it isn't mentioned. What followed was a little drop in his mood, but what I have been reading is that this is normal. It took him about 5 days to return to normal and dote on me again. I hope that with time, this change in mood won't last as long. We did our maintenance spanking after, just to refresh the rules back into his mind and so that he doesn't become complacent. I used the brush again, which got a nice sound and a flinch every time it struck him. I don't know if we will bother to get something else, when we have something that works. Let's see how the next week goes.