Dram Jar Sessions

Visitation Granted

My Keyholder responded to my message - that I had been fretting about (the one I copied above). But, as it turns out she is 100% fine with me sharing details about my struggles and explained that it lets her know how her subs are doing. And, what is more - she will allow me to edge for thirty minutes tonight! I’ve spent nearly every minute of the last eleven days inside a cramped cage. It sucks and I’m aching. So, naturally, I’m looking forward to being uncaged for half an hour. I’m more than thrilled to be allowed to touch my cock, stroke and edge. I got so excited today that a wet mark developed in the crotch area of my pants - while I was at work. The anticipation made me leak precum from within the cage and out into my trousers. How embarrassing. At the time of this writing I still have about five hours to go before I can take my cock cage off.

For this session I will be providing a proper security video - documenting the entire process - cutting the sealed lock, removing the cage, edging for thirty minutes, and then putting the cage back with a new serialized lock. So, there will not be any chance of cheating whatsoever.

Once I’m re-locked I’m expecting that my next hygiene opening will be three days from now. This is serious business.

 

I feel so warm inside

I just finished my thirty minute edging session. I recorded it on video - for security purposes - as described in my previous post. The video shows the unlocking, edging, and re-locking. I don’t really care about that right now. Who cares about locks, cages, chastity, and so on? Right now the feeling I have is amazing. I was allowed to touch myself. I know it has only been eleven days - but, that was very difficult for me. Knowing someone cared enough to let me feel this pleasure was the absolute best! I just feel so loved this moment - it’s an incredible feeling. That’s all I want to say.

 

The Morning After

I'm still feeling groovy. I didn't even mind the pain from my cage last night. I just had a smile on my face the entire time. Actually, I've hardly slept last night. I just sent my morning verification photo and now I'm getting ready for work. I asked for more time - since my current release date is tomorrow. I'm a little scared to find out how much time she will add. Each time I ask I get more time. First it was 2 days, then 3 days 12 hours, and last time it was 5 days. So, I'm going to guess I'll get 7-ish days added. I can't emphasize enough how hellish a cage is - and I don't mean the good kind of hellish. I mean it just plain sucks on so many levels. But, I'm doing it for my Keyholder - because she wants me to. And, that makes me happy.

 

I’m always worried that I might say something wrong.

So, this morning when composing my verification photo I scribbled a message requesting for a time increase - if she would like to see me in a cage longer. I think that part was fine. But due to a concern that I’d soon be released from chastity I sent a second message asking the same thing. She responded to the second message by saying she saw the first message and that I was brave for asking twice because she “will” increase my time. But, then my time wasn’t increased. So, now I’m thinking that maybe she would like to see me go. And, if that is the case, then - yes, absolutely, I should go. Of course I don’t want that. But, that’s life. I just wished I hadn’t have asked twice like that - because now I feel like I’ve ‘topped from the bottom.’ - which I probably did.

I’m currently set to be free from chastity around 6AM PST tomorrow morning.

• Fingers crossed I can stay in her chastity box.
• Fingers crossed I don’t do stupid things - especially when the horny monster gets me.

 

Short update

She added 8 days and 12 hours to my time. I am happy to march on in a sexless state. My goal for the next week is to do better - as a true submissive would. So, when I have those crazy moments in the dead of night wanting to rip the chastity cage off - I'll have to remember the promise I made to myself and keep cool this time.

 

Security Video Enhancement

I really like the idea of incorporating a security video anytime a submissive’s cage is removed. This would include hygiene openings. I’m looking into using a GoPro with a chest mount for cage and penile monitoring.

My idea would be to provide this video online to my Keyholder as an added layer of security. Every video created would always be accessible at any time while the submissive serves his sentence. Viewing of the video is optional for her - and therefore I would have no idea if she watched any of the videos or not.

I believe this would be a pretty reasonable deterrent for unauthorized activities during hygiene cleanings - as well as providing proof the cage was securely locked on time.

As a side note - the Chaster site has a security flaw when it comes to the hygiene openings. Basically, the sub has to be honest during cleanings. In particular, there is no verification photo at the point that the cage needs to be relocked. So, in theory, the cage could be off for a much longer time than what is allowed. Usually an allowed time of 15 to 20 minutes is used for cleaning only. But, even if the sub is honest about removing and re-caging his cock within the allowed time - the sub still has many opportunities to play with himself while cleaning. We want to take this away from him - and punish all unauthorized activity accordingly. Hence, the security video.

My next hygiene cleaning is about one day from now. I’m not sure if I’ll have the time and resources to kludge something together that quickly - but, we’ll see. I really love the idea of using security videos for chastity sentences.

So delicious.

 

How My House Got Clean Today.

I had another one of my painful episodes early in the morning. It started around 5AM with a strong erection attempting to break free of the cage. I turned over to my side hugging my pillow while gently thrusting my hips toward the pillow. This was minimally satisfying - but, more frustrating than anything else. That cage is such a brutal reminder.

An hour passed as I bobbed in and out of sleep. My erection was still trying to bust its way free. And, as I lay there with my pillows, leaking from caged lust, I began thinking about edging. I thought about what I’d do with my penis if it were free right now.

Normally, when I wake up horny with an erection I start by touching the tip of my penis - just as it gets wet. From there I’ll make little circular motions with the end of my index finger - encouraging more precum to flow in response. In short time I’ll have enough lubricating precum to begin stroking my head. Those thoughts made me feel as if I were having an orgasm just then. And, just as my entire body responded to the erotic thoughts with an orgasmic spasm - I immediately felt the cage gripping back at me - which quickly pulled me from this space - and back into the reality of serving time.

It was then I got up and began cleaning the house.

 

100% of those contacting me are SpamDoms - it's depressing in a roundabout way. Looks like that’s all that is out there

 

What I like about chastity - it's both physical and emotional.

 

Hygiene Cleaning - Security Video

This morning I was able to take my cock cage off for a 15 minute hygiene cleaning. Currently, I am allowed to take my cage off every 3 days for cleanings.

As I talked about in a previous post I had the idea of documenting hygiene cleanings with a security video. This week I bought a GoPro for this purpose and strapped the camera to my chest using a special chest harness - which is also sold by the manufacturer. I think the video is a 4k video and with the default settings 15 minutes of video is just under 5GB of space. I used a video editor to crop and reduce the resolution of the video to get the file size down to about 165MB - which is reasonable by today’s standards.

After my hygiene cleaning was over I provided the security video to my Keyholder - showing every action taken during my cage removal and cleaning - including using the Chaster application.

Chaster works like this, when it is time for a hygiene cleaning you can then obtain your combination code from Chaster. Once obtaining your code the timer starts - in my case I have 15 minutes to remove my cage, clean up, and get back in. I’m using plastic locks each with unique serial numbers - so, I don’t need a combination - but, I still need to press that button on Chaster to begin the timer - which will be logged. If I go over 15 minutes I have a penalty - in this case an additional 12 hours will be added to my time in chastity for failure to get inside the cage within the allowed 15 minute period.

Using the GoPro with the chest mount I was able to capture all of this - starting with accessing the Chaster application, cutting the plastic lock off, showing the serial number of the old lock, washing myself (and yes, I got a few free strokes in - but, did not cum), re-locking myself, showing the new serial number, and logging back in using the Chaster app. This is about as close to having a person monitoring you while you take your cage off.

It was a lot of effort - but, I think this makes it fun for her. And, that’s what I want - to be honest. Maybe I can get a good reference out of this too - one day I’d like to find a lady in my age range to take over.

 

I was just watching my security video of my hygiene cleaning. In the video I took the opportunity to stroke myself. I can't even begin to describe the helpless feeling of being caged - and not being able to touch myself. My next hygiene opening is in 3 days. The feeling is maddening.

 

Online Chastity Play - Is it a Fetish?

Honestly, I think the chances are pretty high that it’s a fetish. I’ve been playing online using Chaster for slightly over two weeks now. The game is set up such that anyone joining after me adds time to my lock. But, there isn’t anyone after me. The only person that engaged fully abandoned their lock. There might be other flakes as well (I’ll have to ask my Keyholder about that). But, here’s the thing. I see scads of men looking for keyholders on FetLife and here on Chastity Mansion. So, I sort of thought there’d be a line of people after me that would perpetually trap me. There isn’t. I’m kind of glad though. But, the point is this - where are they? Where are all these submissive men who want a Keyholder? There are openings. It looks a lot like they don’t like all the work of wearing a painful cage and submitting multiple verification photos per day - among other tasks. But, I’m also guessing that these men want constant interaction throughout their chastity play - and when they don’t immediately get it - they bail. Phooey on them.

Anyway, so back to the question. Is online play just a fetish? This may not be the best question, because we all have fetishes. The better question to ask is if your fetish gets in the way of relationships. Are you selfish?

 

Good gosh. I was verifying locked cocks today on Chaster - and jeez - some people just don’t shave. I hate that hairy look - especially when the pubes get long. I much prefer clean shaven cocks.

 

I had the 4:30 AM humps as I woke myself up trying to make love to my pillows again. It comes in waves and I’m in another one now. I feel my heart pumping hard and my cage thumping with the beat. I’m longing for visitation with my penis again. It could be such a beautiful thing to be free. I would love that so much - to be allowed that rhythmic feel again. Physical pleasure. The thought of physical pleasure just makes me wet. It’s hard to get there caged. The cage blocks that feeling of sliding in and out. When I get like this I hope for a mental orgasm - I get frustratingly close at times. I have to wonder how others cope - especially when serving many more days than me - when an hour can feel like a week.

 

Well this was incredible.

I have this friend going back to the early 90s - she was my brother’s girlfriend back then. They broke up during the early 90s and that was that. Until 2008 when I got onto FetLife. She was listed as a Domme and I contacted her - when she saw my photo she reveal to me who she was. I was so embarrassed. Then we didn’t communicate again util 2017 to present. More recently we’ve been talking every week.

Last night we were talking on the phone. We both asked how are week had been - the usual. Then I decided to divulge a little about my chastity excursion this month. I gave a brief explanation on what Chaster is, confirmed I was in a cage, and had a keyholder. Although, I did clarify that my Keyholder isn’t really “My” true Keyholder - but the Keyholder of her real life submissive - and that I’m part of a creative game. I’ve merely hitched a ride on the chastity funboat.

As a side note: My Keyholder is too young and that’s embarrassing for me. And, I don’t mean the kink kind of embarrassing - no, I mean, I feel awkward about it. Luckily, I can’t see her and she can’t see me (because we communicate only through Chaster) - otherwise it would just be unbearable for me given the wide age gap. ​

Anyway, back to my friend. So, after I tell her about my current chastity situation - she offered to help me with that - that is, be my Domme. I was floored. I didn’t accept though - but, instead, I told her I’d be fine talking about my chastity experience with her - I’ll just leave out intimate penile related details. I know this person in real life. She’s visited my house before. And, like I said, she was my brother’s girlfriend 30 years ago - so that kind of puts her in the category of ‘family.’ So, the thought of her monitoring my penis activities has a certain eww factor to it - which I also find rather uncomfortable. But, I really do appreciate talking about my chastity with another, real-life, human - as opposed to being 100% online.

I’ve got to wonder if this is fate.

 

We have SpamDoms and now ZombieDoms.

ZombieDoms seem to be actual humans - but they send one-liner messages to you and take a long time to respond. If you text a response it’ll take them a day or more to respond back, and it’s always along the lines of,

"Are you ready to submit, become my slave, do exactly as I tell you? Right now slut?"​

And, I’m like, “Huh? I don’t even know you.”

 

Sex, violence, and marketing!

EDIT: There's a lot going on here. Big corporations, exploitation, and the decay of humanity.

 

Quick Update

Last night my lock got frozen. I was really scratching my head over why that happened. Not providing a verification photo on time will freeze the lock. But, I had submitted my photos that day. I just could not see what was different this time. I mean, I have been submitting two photos per day for the past 18 days (now 19 days). Eventually, I figured out (thanks to discord) that your Chaster lock has this sort of internal 24 hour timer that starts that moment you join the lock. It gets into a bit of detail how I got frozen exactly. Essentially, it was an innocent mishap. But, I did take the time to compose an apologetic letter - as if written to a judge - explaining the situation, the cause, how I can avoid the issue again, accepting responsibility, and showing remorse - then I politely asked for my lock to be unfrozen. For those that don't know - when you lock freezes the countdown timer stops. In my case I have to ask the Keyholder to unfreeze it.

All for now

- Vengash

 

Quick Update II

My offer of goodwill was accepted and my Keyholder unfroze my lock yesterday. I was let off the hook, but in a roundabout way the price was not to stroke during hygiene cleanings.

Every three days I get to take my cage off for 15 minutes to clean. I have been enjoying this time alone with my penis - by stroking. Although, given the short amount of time to wash myself, shave my privates, and clean the cage - I don’t have much time to stroke. So, I wouldn’t say it was actual edging during my hygiene cleanings - but, it was something I really looked forward to. Now, this has been taken away. I wouldn’t be able to cheat either - thanks to the security video documenting all penile activity.

Yesterday was my scheduled hygiene cleaning. I had 15 minutes with the cage off. For the first time, I didn’t stroke while my cage was off for hygiene washing. After cleaning up and re-caging myself with a new serialized lock seal - I began to feel a bit desperate. I was so accustom to feeling my own penis during these short moments. I had this sinking feeling - losing that last bit of control over my cock just got to me. I have to say, I regret negotiating away my last bit freedom with my penis.

I broke down and began asking for relief - specifically, visitation rights with my penis. I would so love to have 30 minutes out of the cramped cage and enjoy the simple pleasure of slowly stroking my cock, breathing heavily, and getting very close to squirting. I don’t know when I can do this now - and that’s giving me a bit if a mind fuck.

During my low moment - I just wished that I had kept cool about it. When I get frustratingly horny I know it will pass eventually. But, no, I had to ask and pester again. Well, I guess I can’t suddenly be perfect in a day - it’s a slow (arduous?) process.

 

There’s a Problem - I’m not Working.

I’ve got one day left on Chaster - that is, I have one day left before completing my chastity sentence. After that I can take the cage off and do whatever I want. Last night, I finally had a chance to get a restful night’s sleep. This is in stark contrast to the previous night - where I only got 3 hours sleep. I couldn’t function at all yesterday due to lack of sleep. And, I’ve had many sleepless nights this month. My sleep is often interrupted by strong erections inside my cage - and that would trigger the horny cycle - a downward spiral of unhealthy behavior.

I’ve let chastity games become an addiction - albeit - a temporary addiction. Day and night I’ve been checking the Chaster site, FetLife, and Chastity Mansion. I’ve been looking for a Keyholder closer to my age on the side (nearly all are FinDoms though). And, of course, the physical aspects of abstinence while caged is a continuous distraction that feeds the addiction. This isn’t healthy. For this entire month, I haven’t been working and now have started to miss expectations. I have a gig to perform in a week and I haven’t even begun to study for that. I feel like the recovering drug addict that’s recently fucked up.

Today is day 20.5 of my chastity confinement and it seems so long - but the truth is when I’m busy working often I’ll just plain forget to masturbate for a couple of weeks. So, it’s kind of funny when you stop to think about it. Some view chastity as a means to control men, make them more productive, attentive, and so on. And, while I’m sure this works out in some cases, for me enforced chastity is accomplishing the exact opposite compared to being free. What does that say? It’s a fetish.

After getting a good night’s sleep I feel as if I’ve sobered up and have woken up to finally see the streak of chaos all over my house. I’m sorry this isn’t pleasant or entertaining to read. I’m in a mood this morning. I don’t feel bad or upset - more stoic after taking a step back and saying “WTF?!!?” to myself.

Give me some time to sort this out.

 

I Got 10 More Days

I remember glancing at my Chaster timer before going to bed. The timer indicates how long I need to wait for my chastity sentence to be over. The timer said something like 7 hours. I went to sleep thinking I could have the cage officially removed and be free roughly by 10:30AM the next morning. That did not happen. When I woke I saw my timer had 10 days added. I was really looking forward to taking this hellish chastity cage off my dick. I think the thing I’ve missed the most while in chastity is the true freedom to touch myself down there whenever I wanted.

At this time I will be allowed out of my cage on October 2, 2023

 

I fucked up.

I was allowed 30 minutes of edging. I had not one but four accidents during the first 20 minutes. Since all of this was recorded on video using my GoPro there was no hiding the fact. I tried to play it low key - but, when your dick is shooting hot white cum - it’s a little hard to say it didn’t happen. To be clear, though, this wasn’t a full orgasm - not even close to that. It was more on the scale of premature ejaculation.

So, now I’ve been tasked with coming up with several punishment ideas to fit the “crime” I’ve committed. Off the top of my head I had these two ideas for restitution.

1. No visitation rights (time with cage off, for edging or whatever) for 14 days and add 15 days to my chastity confinement.
2. 15 minutes of Icy Hot applied to my cock and balls

I don't know if my Keyholder is into CBT - probably not - but, I'd prefer a quicker way to resolve this over spending more time in my chastity cage.

 

And, now I wait. I wait for punishment to be handed out. Doom and gloom.

 

And, I feel like such a shit for lack of control. I really thought I could pull off edging without any accidents.

 

I'm really worried I won't be able to touch my penis for a long time. What I mean is I'm concerned I will not get any visitation rights with my penis while in chastity - for things such as edging or wearing my favorite underwear. That'd be the worst feeling. Imprisoned with no hope.