About me and requesting advice!

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by mistress jennie, Jul 9, 2009.

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  1. mistress jennie
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    mistress jennie Mistress Jennie

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    Hi to all.

    I am new to here and ordered my slave to make up my name and register me on this site for a couple of reasons. One so that I can check what my cheeky slave is up to and secondly to look for advice and inspiration.

    I am fortunate in that my slave (sandra) and I live together and share the same ideals in this wonderful lifestyle. We have played at this for nearly 6 years but have decided now is the time to step it up a notch or two.

    About a year ago I purchased the CB6000 for sandra and we have had a few attempts at keeping her in chastity, it all goes well for a while then one of us looses interest and it all falls apart again. This time however we are both determined to make it work. My problem is that years ago i was a submissive and never in my wildest dreams did i even contemplate turning the tables and becoming a Mistress, that was until I met sandra. I now have so much admiration for Masters and Mistresses' i never understood and even took for granted the hard work that has to be put in....and often when tired or out of sorts I let things slip thinking sandra will just keep going until im ready to start again, but it just doesn't work like that does it!

    Up until last night sandra had been locked in 24/7 for nearly a week, but last night the device kept waking sandra up every hour and after a while we had to take the device off as she became irritable. Sandras work involves concentration and what she does could be dangerous if over tired so obviously she needs a good nights sleep. Does anyone have any suggestions regarding this as she wants to stay in it 24/7. I have suggested keeping it off during the night and replacing it the following morning, but she has said she is worried that she can't trust herself to want to put it back on.. what can I do to make sure she does and what can she do to make sure she does?

    I have never known her more attentive, loving, obedient, horny, eager to please etc in my life so it is obvious to us both that it works but how do we get over this problem? I would appreciate any advice that anyone can give.

    Anyway I will post more later.

    Thank you all.
    Mistress Jennie
    :cat:
     
  2. Rachel
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    Rachel Owned by Mistress Michelle

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    Mistress Jennie get a stainless steel slave collar. Before you take off the device put on the collar. In the morning the collar doesn't come off until sandra puts the device back on.

    Rachel
     
  3. mikecb
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    mikecb Member

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    Mistress Jennie, I can think of a few options. First, the full steel belts seem to be more comfortable for overnight wear, since they don't pull on the balls so much. If you're really committed to the lifestyle, than one may be a good investment. It not only guarantees security, but also removes the unsightly bulges from the lines of your gurl's panties.

    Another option is to secure him at night. I know xcitex is currently either locked in his CB over night, or tied to the bed, to keep his hands away from temptation. Following up on Rachel's idea, a nice collar could work, with sandra's hands chained to them, so that she can't reach below the waist.

    Best of luck to you!
    mikecb
     
  4. PuppyMastersPet
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    The bridlocked seems comfortable from what I've read but I also agree with Mike about full belts. The other bonus with full belts such as the neo steel is that you can get ones that have a flat front.
     
  5. Miss D
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    Miss D Expert In Femming

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    Was the reason sandra couldn't sleep due to irritation or because she was horny and needed to cum?

    One suggestion to keep her needy but still be allowed a cum is a 'ruined orgasm'. Lock or tie her hands behind her. Then use a little lube and rub her clitty until she is right at the edge - then let go. With a little practice to get the timing down, she'll cum - but it won't be a full orgasm. Just beware - she might try to hump air when you let go - especially if she's a very horny slut. Afterwards, she will be more content in her chastity overnight but still remain quite needy.

    There are plenty of variations on the 'ruined O' - you can get her to the edge over and over before you allow her a cummy. Or you can give her a prescribed time to finish her task (my favorite - because it helps her develop a hair trigger).

    Being able to sleep when in a horny state is a problem for a lot of subbies... Surely, there must be others with suggestions about how they do it....
     
  6. Miss D
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    Miss D Expert In Femming

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    By the way - Welcome to the Mansion, Mistress Jennie.

    Sandra is a very lucky gurl to have such a caring Mistress overseeing her femming.
     
  7. Amber
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    Amber Senior Member

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    Hello Mistress Jennie

    I've been locked in a cb3000 for nearly a month now and have got used to sleeping in my device. After my 1st period in chastity a changed to a different back ring which helped alot . So i suggest trying different back rings/spacers till sandra finds a good fit.

    Welcome to the mansion

    Slave Matt
     
  8. desertsub
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    desertsub Junior Member

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    Mistress Jennie, I had pretty much the same experience as Slave Matt. I ended up using a solid ring for the CB2000 and going to the next wider spacer and it made all the difference in the world! Most of the time during the day I forget I even have the CB3000 on, and at night the only time it bothers me is early in the morning when I get those 'pee hard-ons' and I get up and go to the bathroom to pee and it takes care of that problem. I agree with Slave Matt in that you probably just need to 'tune' the fit of your chastity device to your slave.
     
  9. mistress jennie
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    mistress jennie Mistress Jennie

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    Thank you all very much for your constructive advice, I will certainly talk to sandra about the way forward.

    Mistress Jennie
    :cat:
     
  10. PT109
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    PT109 Senior Member

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    Welcome Mistress Jennie, One thing you did not mention was punishment. How often, if ever, do you spank, whip, flog or paddle her? I have found that punishment is very helpful for me to remain submissive. A little punishment is ecstasy for me, a little more is blissful and a little more puts me over the top- not to an orgasm, but to a state of exhaustion mentally and physically that I couldn't imagine not being able to sleep. The feeling relaxes me for days at a time. Finding the optimum level of punishment can be like dialing in a sissy sub for perfect service because the memory stays with you for days reminding you of your place in respect to your Mistress. Orgasms become less important and yearning less distracting.
     
  11. maid katrin
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    maid katrin chaste sissy maid

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    Dear Mistress Jennie,

    i am sorry for being late for saying hello and welcome to the forum.

    As for Your question i agree with mikecb that another device, like a full steel belt, might help Your sissy finding sleep with the device locked over night. It does not stress Your sissy's balls and of course, Your sub will appear much more feminine down there - probably an appreciated side effect.
    Nevertheless You must be aware that a full belt takes some adjustement time so You better start making her wearing it 24/7 during her holidays, when an uneasy night is less important.

    *curtsey*

    maid katrin
     
  12. mistress jennie
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    mistress jennie Mistress Jennie

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    Thanks again for your replies.
    Regarding punishments we have no set ones. We do however have a chore and task chart. Each chore and task is asigned points and at the end of each week these points are added up. If sandra has reached her point goal then she is rewarded with a treat. However tasks and chores that are not completed or are not completed to my satisfaction carry minus points making her goal harder to reach.

    I do have other ideas which i will share with you all soon!

    Any other ideas for gurly chorse would of course be welcome.

    Mistress Jennie
    :cat:
     
  13. ownedbyher
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    ownedbyher Member

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    Firstly, welcome to the site. I was thinking about the situation of how to get a good nights sleep.

    If you want to ensure that there is no masturbation perhaps you could tape a condom over the penis. Use a unique type of tape that only you have access to. If it is removed you will know. If there is an orgasm you will know. Then I suggest a very severe punishment.

    If it is simply a matter of getting them back into the device in the morning. That is rather simple. Make to consequences of not being in the device soo much worse. I liked the slave collar idea. You know your situation best and should be able to tailor a suitable punishment. Something that will really drive home that being in the device is the best place to be.

    There are plenty of great and wise mistresses here that will be able to help devise a suitable punishment regime.

    Good luck and welcome again.
     
  14. chastityslavejohn
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    chastityslavejohn Mistress Irianna's pet

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    hmmmm, a sub that isn't punished? whatever works for Y/you both is fine but i could not live without O/our weekly sessions and the feel of Mistresses' toys as i scream into the pillow.
     
  15. mistress jennie
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    mistress jennie Mistress Jennie

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    slave john, don't get me wrong here sandra is punished, she has various punishments, she loves bondage, floggers whips etc... which makes a good flogging not so much a punishment as enjoyment for her. We both have to balance our real life with out D/s lifestyle and punishments can range from not being allowed to go out and "play" with her friends at the pub, or being totally ignored by me! However I would happily chastise her with a very good caning if she seriously misbehaved.

    She is now entering into her second week of chastity and training and I have to say that we have taken on board a lot of suggestions we have both been given on these forums and working out what works for us.

    Tonight sandra will be experiencing two things that she has not encountered before which will really test her obedience and devotion to her Mistress. She will post on the forum tommorow her experience (sandra locked). So please read and leave her feedback!

    Mistress Jennie
    :cat:
     
  16. chastityslavejohn
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    chastityslavejohn Mistress Irianna's pet

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    sorry for misunderstanding. Mistress.

    i have a love-hate relationship with my punishment sessions. i love the idea of it, i love struggling against the chains, i love being at Mistresses' mercy...and i love the spanking and pain up to a point. i truly hate some of Her toys, especially the cane and the leather paddle. Mistress has broken several canes on my ass. i am always beaten until i am hoarse from screaming.
     
  17. PT109
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    PT109 Senior Member

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    I understand the inclination to attach punishment to bad behavior- it fulfills some expectations of fantasies that are acted out etc. But consider the fact that most of us subs love to be punished. So... if you "reward" bad behavior with punishment, you will never be able to control your sub. If he likes punishment and you like to give him punishment, then use it liberally, randomly and skillfully. Ignoring your sub is not the greatest idea either. If you must ignore him do it in a way that reinforces his submissiveness to you. My Mistress will tell me to go into the closet and close the door. Sitting in the dark closet by myself for an extended period of time gets me out of her hair so to speak. I'm being ignored, yes, but she is ignoring me in an "active" manner- I'm in the closet, in the dark and every minute I am in there is the result of an action on her part. My deprivation is a willful act on her part. You can add a twist to the closet routine by telling your sub to place clothes pins or other clamps on nipples, cock and balls etc. or adding a butt plug.
     
  18. chastityslavejohn
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    chastityslavejohn Mistress Irianna's pet

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    by far the worst punishment that Mistress could do to me is to ignore me.
     
  19. Mistress Kate
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    Mistress Kate Senior Member

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    A belated welcome Mistress Jenni !

    I think the replies to date tell the story really - most guys only get real comfort (and I think satisfaction) in long term wear with a steel belt. We moved very quickly from CB3K to Neosteel and, after the initial wearing in issues, Cobweb finds it pretty comfortable - and that's the Total Belt which is not supposed to be their most comfortable option.

    Yes there were the usual overnight issues already referred to with the CB3K but I think there's also the fact that the wearer knows with the CB range that if they really want/need to break them off they can do - there's obviously no getting out of the Neosteel ! That is the day they really do handover control.

    ChastityslaveJohn - interesting that your worst punishment is being ignored because I find that it is the most effective. If I think that Cobweb hasn't been paying me enough attention, as soon as I stop the flirting/teasing etc and ignore him, it doesn't take long before I have his focus & attention again !
    Since he got his new job in charge of an all female team I seem to be having to refocus him too often - because they all flirt with him too (although I don't worry over him straying - he's not likely to want to get into a clinch with any of them locked in his belt !).
     
  20. mistress jennie
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    mistress jennie Mistress Jennie

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    Thank you all again for your replies, and appologies for not replying earlier. We have been having a few issues, which are now we hope resolved!

    Mistress Jennie
    :cat:
     
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