Why Isn't Chastity More Popular?

It is getting more popular. Ann summers is a British high street sex shop that has carried cages so they must be selling.

 

Personally, I think chastity brings up the image of Catholic religious practices. That'll scare lots of folks away. They also think it's no sex, ever. At least both of those thoughts were mine. Unless you're a fiend like me, who's constantly researching everything sexual I can find, you'd not know that it's actually an act of servitude to a wife or KH. That changes the dynamic A LOT.

 

Five years ago my Wife (KH) and I had never heard of it. Maybe it needs to be talked about and explained better...JMHO

 

Maybe it just needs to be in popular culture.

Sex and the City did wonders for Rampant Rabbit sales.

Chastity was in californication, but in a way that kinda missed the point. Maybe something more like that might get people interested.

 

I can think of quite a few reasons.

First off, the name. When we think of "chastity devices" we imagine Victorian (or Medieval) contraptions. But as a few minutes on this group will point out, these cages are more of a sex toy, and generally serve to make men think about sex even more. "Chastity" is a bad name for these things.

Sex toys are fun, but people in general don't like things that are complicated. When you realize how many posts are asking for help in figuring out how to wear a device, how to deal with discomfort, how to sleep through the night, and how to manage hygiene, it becomes obvious that cages are not simple items like dildos or blindfolds.

Since men stereotypically want to screw anything that moves, locking a cage on their junk seems counter-intuitive. It's difficult to explain the motivation behind why one would want this.

And that brings up a major point: Cages are associated with submissive roles. Men in submissive roles are often seen as unmanly or lacking in competence. Think about any movie in the past 30 years in which there is a depiction of a submissive male, especially in a BDSM context. They are almost always played off as a joke. Anyone looking at chastity devices online is going to run into some... unpleasant or unappealing tropes.

 

Yes only a decade ago cages were medieval but have really been revolutionised as they get smaller and more comfortable. Someone must have actually seen the marketing value and sat up and took notice.

 

It may be more popular than you think!
I have two nieces who keep their man locked, I have seen the outline of their devices!
It has even creeped into prime time TV shows. There was an episode of Chicago PD, where they pulled a guy over that was wearing a chastity belt under a skirt!

 

It has definitely become more popular. Just look at the main pages of sex shops.

Women have more rights than ever before and it has become more socially accepted for a man to be led by his woman than the reverse.
Quite a few men seem to be unable to negotiate a fulfilling sex life with their wives and resort to chastity to give their wives the responsibility for initiating ("lead, follow or get out of the way").
Porn is ubiquitous and many men are searching for hacks to manage this energy-draining temptation.

OTOH, in terms of raw productivity, self discipline is better for a man than submission.
This drawback is amplified by health risks ("use it or lose it") and adjacency to fetishes like cuckolding that can never truly be accepted by mainstream society.
So I think chastity may become commonplace, but not necessarily cool.

 

And how was that scene played? Did the writers make a joke of it? Was it humiliating for the guy? Did the officers make sarcastic comments about him after he was led away?

"Featured in an episode" doesn't necessarily mean in a good light.

 

A study I read a few years ago and actually shared with my therapist, is that a whopping 94% of women prefer to be submissive to their male partner & relationship Which left only 6% interested in being the dominant in the relationship.

For roleplaying/sex games, it was 75% women preferred to be submissive most of the time & males were 49%. (I believe this was a Kinsey Institute study)

So the idea that FLR, chastity , and male submission is going to take off world wide and become the norm.....not going to happen.

Its only a lifestyle shared by a. small percentage. Just like me being ABDL/ageplayer. Though chastity play, etc, has picked up. I believe its mostly for fun and games.

 

It think it's because of the all or nothing direction it goes in. On and off play can feel like pandering to the sub for the dom, or disinterest in the dom. When both engage with it it seems to head in the direction of full time chastity slavery which is not an easy life. Maybe some guys are smarter than me and realise at the beginning that suggesting it or buying a cage may well be quite life changing permanently.

 

Interesting. It's only been 3 weeks for us. We try to walk the line. My wife is not a dom though. In a sense, I'm the dom, locking myself up for her. I don't think she'd ever take total charge of my cock although it is a desire of mine. So I don't see it turning into a 100% locked and denied kind of thing. Deep down, I guess I'm hoping chastity does provide opportunities for growth with both of us. I learn to sub in a service kind of way, she learns to dom with her own needs. Still, I believe she needs to be fucked. I don't see her ever wanting to give that up.

 

I can't help thinking that the dominance and submission is a red herring, and that women would be much more interested by the practical aspects. That any lack of enthusiasm in the bedroom is down to him cracking off a sneaky one in the shower twice a day, or that she can relax when he goes on the sales team golf weekend knowing that there are only 18 holes he'll be trying to put anything into.

 

The chokepoint preventing male chastity from being more popular is that all practical devices can be defeated without leaving evidence. Therefore, the keyholder has to understand and believe in the streak of submissive masochism that keeps the wearer honest.

If there was the dick version of a FitBit that could be fitted to a chastity device, then just maybe they might see some vanilla use.

 

Actually, the killer app would be an adhesive patch as an anchor.

 

Male chastity is popular. Look at how many cages are offered for sale, even on the vanilla sites like amazon and ebay. Not many years ago you'd be hard pushed to find many different models of cage, now you're completely spoiled for choice. If it wasn't popular, they wouldn't make them for sale.

It's just that people are reluctant to admit publicly that they do it, as it goes against the deeply ingrained cultural norm that men are the dominant sex.

 

I certainly think it's a popular kink, but I don't think it can jump into the mainstream without major technological improvements.

 

You will never no how popular chastity or any kink is or isn’t. Do you know the details of the sex lives of your neighbors? How many of them are kinky. Does Chastity improve a couple any better than a great sex life? Is it more beneficial than say puppy play, shibari, role play scenes or the male dominant fantasies in romance novels and “Fifty Shades of Grey”, that women have spent billions of dollars on? Are the chastity benefits really that beneficial (other than as another fun sex toy) for large numbers of women or is that only true of the “echo chamber”, of this and similar websites telling you so? Possibly, the “benefits”, are really just what chastity fetishists are tryin to sell their partners on.

My wife love keeping me in a chastity device but mainly because it extends my bondage outside of the house (not that she hasn’t taken on dates in significant bondage hidden by clothing, but I digress).

I remain baffled that anyone cares about how popular chastity is. I don’t spend any more time wondering that than I do wondering why everyone isn’t more interested in sleepsack, and I don’t think much about it.

 

You and your partner would get more benefit from practicing semen retention and meditating together instead of chastity, and both are wildly more popular than chastity.

 

REPOST had to fix, spelling grammar missing words…


You will never know how popular chastity or any kink is or isn’t. Do you know the details of the sex lives of your neighbors? How many of them are kinky. Does Chastity improve a couple any better than a great sex life? Is it more beneficial than say puppy play, shibari, role play scenes or the male dominant fantasies in romance novels and “Fifty Shades of Grey”, that women have spent billions of dollars on? Are the chastity benefits really that beneficial (other than as another fun sex toy), for large numbers of women or is that only true of the “echo chamber”, of this and similar websites telling you so? Possibly, the “benefits”, are really just what chastity fetishists are trying to sell their partners on.


My wife love keeping me in a chastity device but mainly because it extends my bondage outside of the house (not that she hasn’t taken me on dates in significant bondage hidden by clothing, but I digress).


I remain baffled that anyone cares about how popular chastity is. I don’t spend any more time wondering that than I do wondering why everyone isn’t more interested in sleepsack, and I don’t think much about it.

 

I get your point on devices being escapable, but a spiked device makes this very uncomfortable, so I think the main reason is that so many men are not willing to suffer any sort of discomfort, irritation or inconvenience that they would never entertain wearing a cage.
And I see your point about a dick Fitbit, after seeing some posts about cheaters being caught out because of there Iwatches, then surely a locking I watch strap would help with this.

 

I’ve been in chastity since the 80s and have tracked chastity online and in magazines the whole time. I believe the evidence shows that men’s obsession with chastity has many many more negative impacts on relationships than positive. In fact there is more coercion represented on this site than what I see could ever see as healthy. Therefore, I’ve concluded it is not straightforward. The number of women on this site trying to convince others is minimal. My wife is very chastity positive but, says she would never represent it as helpful to a girlfriends relationship as she believes it is at best equally likely to cause harm than good.

 

The point I was trying to make is that chastity devices only get to be mainstream if vanilla partners believe in them.