A KH Wife's response to Mistress Lucy

Thank you, Mrs. JackKing. One other thing that rubs me the wrong way is certain people saying that the women on here are more than likely "not real" Totally bothers me...I know for a fact I am NOT "some dude who could have pulled random pics of women from Facebook" I am 100% female who enjoys keeping her man locked and denied. It enriches our already-great relationship. Makes him more attentive and doting.

 

Also, chastity was a mutual decision between the two of us. We had never even considered it before, but happened upon a chastity cage at the local adult store, and decided to give it a go since it sounded intriguing. That was over a year ago, and he is now locked 24/7 except when i want to use him. Unlike many women, I DO love sex and intimacy, and would never consider him a bother even if we had never even began chastity, if he wanted to have sex. I see it as a compliment.

 

I really wish those who have no relationship experience especially with chastity would stop judging other couples and especially new key holders. Locking up others with zero emotional attachment for your own person gains is entirely different from locking up your boyfriend or husband to help enhance your relationship which is the ultimate goal. The two types of locked up people can't even be compared as the goals are almost entirely different in most cases. I'm sorry to hear you are disabling you cm account Mrs. Jackking. I hope it is for the reasons you stated versus being bullied or attacked by members less understanding of chastity and marriage.

 

Meow

 

We learned 4 years ago that Chastity only worked when we did it our way. I will never lick a boot or be ordered around by anyone. My wife asks me nicely to do things and I can refuse if I wish. As far as chastity goes, she enjoys hearing me moan when she teases and denies me. She also feels I am more pliable when I am denied an orgasm and she does not feel guilty about not wanting sex as much as I do. We both agree on my orgasm denial period and we work together to enforce it but sometimes we don't and no big deal. We have no rules and have lived a fetish lifestyle for 45 years with BDSM being the only one that is a constant in our marriage. These days I am too old to take the punishment I used to want. Plus our girlfriend is no longer with us. She was the one really into S&M.

We have always treated fetishes as a sex game and something that is fun for both of us. We had a few false starts but chastity only worked when we did it our way and not the way most websites portrayed it.

 

You're not the only one. I've all but stopped posting here because I've been called a man one too many times. I have a life outside of this forum and when I'm here I want to enjoy myself and my friends here. I don't want to have to defend my gender every time I log on, I've got better things to do.

I'll get off my soapbox now. ;-)

 

All sorts of women here seem to fall into the trap of thinking any of the other women must be men, just because they behave in different ways than themselves.
Here was can see that to claim such a thing of someone is deeply damaging to the community and to the members themselves and it is clear that CM would be a better place if members were to look to their own input without making claims on anyone else's.

 

It's interesting that every single one of the threads she starts, or conversations she enters, turns into an argument. Suppose it's everyone else though, right?

And maybe it is. When you refuse to give an inch, or acknowledge that 2&2 makes 4, its easy to aggrevate people.

I also find it constantly notable that she derides people here non-stop - women for "indulging" men, men for basically existing, and anyone who dare comment with anything less than a nauseatingly predictable FrankyTeardrop worship fest for speaking, all with nary a word from the peace-making mods who normally step in when one person is repeatedly caustic toward others. I can be a jerk too (this post will surely fall under that category. But I balance it out by talking to other members here about THEM. By participating in a benign way most of the time. That's the difference).

But being a man-hater is not terribly notable. Hell, its cliche. It's the women-hating part that gets me. So much frustration from her about the fact that some women enjoy using this lifestyle to pleasure more than just themselves. That's the one common theme in all the nonsense. "The men are getting something out of it, how dare they" "the women seem to not mind their men enjoying themselves. How dare they!"

Which is ironic, since unless those men in her pics are literally there against their wills, one might surmise that they too must be getting something out of it... Which, if we follow the logic train down the tracks here, means that it's not actually men getting something out their chastity arrangements that bothers her, it's the fact that what those men's partners are getting out of the arrangement isn't what SHE would denand out of it that irks her. And because what you ladies like about the lifestyle isn't what she likes, you're bad.

"what I like is right, what you like is wrong" "if you don't agree with me your dumb" "if you don't do this how I do this you're doing it wrong".

But let's take it a little further. We've concluded that since their not actual prisoners, the men she shows must get something out of their time with Lucy. And therefore if she's okay with that, it's not actually men enjoying chastity or "sub-life" that bothers her, like she constantly claims. So what is her problem? Why is she so antagonistic?

I have no idea. But I have some thought on the subject!

It comes to why she is involved in any sort of D/S lifestyle to begin with. When you are the center of the universe it can be very hard to coexist socially in a healthy, well adjusted way. And if that's the case, finding truly submissive people who will cater to you behavior - behavior that would absolutely be considered anti-social and maladjusted in ANY other context - would be a very attractive prospect. If you can't get along with people because they don't bow down to you and all your teenage wisdom, then finding a community of fish in a barrel who will is an extremely self-affirming goldmine. But it's unhealthy. Period.

Having people like FrankyTeardrop who are happy to back you up even when what you say (beyond being rude and hurtful) is planely wrong, is a very dangerous thing for someone who may already tend toward extreme narcissism.


I can acknowledge when she makes a valid point - for instance, the frequency of posts from men who, clearly just have a denial fetish, trying to cajole their women into the lifestyle to cater to it all while claiming they want to serve them, is honestly annoying - she's right about that. But I ask you, whoever "you" are - go, right now, and find me one instance where Lucy affirms a decent point made by someone with whom she disagrees, or is arguing with. Go on. I'll wait.


So here we again - with a growing number of members clearly frustrated with the inane ramblings of one member who has no real parallel relationship experience to draw on.

"Before I joined these sites I had an image of the submissive male in my mind, the kind of males I had met throughout my life who had submitted to me in their own ways. sweet, kind, helpful, caring, generous, the sort of male who actually wants to SERVE a woman and contribute to her happiness"

They. Just. Wanted. To fuck you. Sorry - it's a harsh reality, but one I feel like most women learn at 14. Doesn't mean there are no good guys. Just means the good ones want to fuck you just as much as the douchbag ones do. ESPECIALLY when you're a teenager. That's how teenage boys who are "nice guys" try to get in your pants, because they haven't learned any other way yet. And I feel sorry for those boys who became infatuated with the type of girl who will take advantage of them and use them to "serve" her all while pretending they're unaware that the the boy has had the crush.

(My implication that she's talking about teenage experience isn't meant to belittle at all. I promise. It's an acknowledgment that when a 24 year old says "throughout my life" they're likely including teenage years. No?)


The longest car servicing ever is wrapping up, and so must I. Apologies in advance for whatever may offend whoever.

 

BOOM. Drop mic and walk out thatguyontheinternet. Well done.

 

For some on CM they just have way too much testosterone for their own good.

Also if their natural environment is a very macho and boys winding each other up all the time guess what.
The change to having to be polite and respectful is quite a culture shock to say the least. We also have our share of people typing with one hand and the other doing well you can guess.
This then produces some quite random posts often rude or making judgements on people they don't know.

Xx Wendy

 

BOOm - etc.

Except in this version it's a loud klackity-clack as Wendy sits giving serious eyebrow to all and sundry, elbow on table, elegantly curled fingers on chin, while clicking her fingernails on the table top with other hand.

 

Don't have much to add here, as having ignored Lucy long ago, I hadn't realized that she was still provoking people with her posts.

It does strike me as odd that the moderators haven't taken any action against someone who seems bent on driving away active, engaged, friendly female users of this site.

 

Lucy's point is valid to some extent, topping from the bottom is a resilient virus almost any sub had to deal with at some point and we're all well aware of it. But what you seem to fail to understand Lucy, is that chastity for the majority of us is practiced in the context of a loving relationship. Just because the male gets pleasure out of it does not mean the KH got tricked into doing something she wouldn't want to do.

You're not emotionally attached to the subs you're dealing with so the sexual component in these relationships is non existent, which is not the case for most of us. Our ladies love to tease and play with us (Although i'm not allowed any orgasm in 2017 )

At the end of the day, to each his own, and it's about agreeing it's just about understanding the other person's point of view.

Now i'm back to "Meows"

 

I'm not married tho
And i'm not asking you to try anything, as i said to each his own, just understand and respect that's all.
Nobody has any problem with people having online Keyholders, you were the one criticizing the way we practice chastity by manipulating our partner remember?

So if there's someone responsible for that "Two camp separation" kind of thing, it's probably you. Than again, who am i to judge, i'm just a simple cat

 

I believe you have a very valid point there.

Not that there is anything wrong with online chastity(I wouldn't be into it), but it is a totally different animal than experiencing it with a loved one.

I do think you are right that there are far fewer doing this with a loving partner than those that get a stranger to be their keyholders. I've said it before, I am a very lucky guy. I was able to find someone that not only accepts this part of me, but has grown to like it just as much if not more than me. This is a rarity I know. I would also say that many here that actually participate actively here are in this type of relationship. The 25000 other members come and go, buy devices excited to start, only to stop when the thrill is gone.

And you're right on another point...the other members aspire to have their partner be their keyholder. That is the end game. That is what most(hate saying all) would like to have. So no it's not a site for couples only, but I believe that it's what most are trying to achieve at some point.

So upon hearing what couples are doing or into, I can see some individuals assuming they will receive the same treatment, indulgence, and understanding. Of course this is not the reality of life. A stranger is not going to want to put in the effort (it is work despite what subs say), or have a sexual relationship without something more substantial in return besides obedience. What does it matter to a stranger that your dick is locked up? To a spouse it's a sacrifice. The differences are too numerous to put down.

I believe online keyholders are probably more prevalent and the reality to most here...but also believe that if given an opportunity, would jump to find an intimate relationship with a keyholder. So I would not say it as an elite thing, but it is where most here would like to be someday.

Very good points on your end Lucy, and I don't believe one way is right and another is wrong, but so far apart from each other that comparing the two is futile.