There are 3 types of people in this world ...

Discussion in 'Off topic discussions' started by manintyres, Aug 4, 2017.

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  1. manintyres
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    manintyres Junior Member

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    #1 manintyres, Aug 4, 2017
    Those that can add up .....

    And those that can't :)
     
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  2. Muzzo4you
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    Muzzo4you Bored and looking to find a play partner

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    #2 Muzzo4you, Aug 4, 2017
    So true. Also there are two rules to achieve success:

    #1 Don't tell everything you know
     
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  3. Vinny
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    Vinny Locked up again. Starting year 6.

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    #3 Vinny, Aug 4, 2017
    Our Mensa club sells a Tee Shirt that says there are 10 types of people, those who know binary numbers and those who do not. You need to know binary numbers to understand this.:)
     
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  4. Muzzo4you
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    Muzzo4you Bored and looking to find a play partner

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    #4 Muzzo4you, Aug 4, 2017
    (an oldie but goodie...)

    One day my wife sat down next to me while I was flipping TV channels. She asked, "What's on the TV?"
    I said, "Dust."
    And that's when I became her maid......
     
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  5. AlanThom
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    AlanThom Hi, I'm Alan.....

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    #5 AlanThom, Aug 5, 2017
    A friend of mine drank a gallon of varnish..... he didnt like it.... but what a great finish......
     
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  6. AlanThom
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    AlanThom Hi, I'm Alan.....

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    #6 AlanThom, Aug 5, 2017
    Ok, last one, a favorite......

    What do you call someone who points out the obvious to you?

    Someone who points out the obvious.
     
  7. NsToy
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    NsToy Long term member

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    #7 NsToy, Aug 5, 2017
    A classic it joke. Reminds me of the ID10T errors people always get.
     
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  8. Muzzo4you
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    Muzzo4you Bored and looking to find a play partner

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    #8 Muzzo4you, Aug 5, 2017
    So, why is it that blind people don't sky dive?

    Because it scares the crap out of their dogs.
     
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  9. smoothwoodpecker
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    smoothwoodpecker Member

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    #9 smoothwoodpecker, Aug 5, 2017
    Two for the geeks..

    I used to program in fuzzy logic.... until I got a new monitor.

    I've got a digital watch.. the time is always 1 0 clock.
     
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  10. kellysbitch
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    kellysbitch Long term member

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    #10 kellysbitch, Aug 5, 2017
    Haven't I told you a million times not to exaggerate.
     
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  11. manintyres
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    manintyres Junior Member

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    #11 manintyres, Aug 5, 2017
    i got injured at the seafood disco the other nite.....i pulled a muscle :)
     
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  12. manintyres
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    manintyres Junior Member

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    #12 manintyres, Aug 5, 2017
    2 wind turbines chatting first asks 'what music do you like?'

    Second says 'im a big metal fan' :)
     
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  13. Felix cum ea
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    Felix cum ea Vanilla Chaste

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    #13 Felix cum ea, Aug 5, 2017
    Three submarines at the bottom of the ocean want to play cards but miss a fourth party.
    When an egg swims by the submarines ask whether the egg would like to play along.
    The egg replies: No sorry I have no time, I have to get to my hair dresser's appointment
     
  14. Vinny
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    Vinny Locked up again. Starting year 6.

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    #14 Vinny, Aug 5, 2017
    I would never join a club that would have someone like me for a member.
     
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  15. Muzzo4you
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    Muzzo4you Bored and looking to find a play partner

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    #15 Muzzo4you, Aug 6, 2017
    How do you get Holy Water?
    You boil the Hell out of it.
     
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  16. AlanThom
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    AlanThom Hi, I'm Alan.....

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    #16 AlanThom, Aug 9, 2017
    Why do gorillas have suck big nostrils?

    Have you seen the size of those fingers?
     
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  17. Muzzo4you
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    Muzzo4you Bored and looking to find a play partner

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    #17 Muzzo4you, Aug 18, 2017
    What did the Buddhist ask the hot dog vendor?
    "Make me one with everything."
    The Buddhist gives him a $20, and the vendors pockets it.
    The Buddhist asks for change to which the vendor replies,
    "Change comes from within."
     
  18. manintyres
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    manintyres Junior Member

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    #18 manintyres, Sep 8, 2017
    I usually meet my girlfriend at 12:59 .......... because I like that one-to-one time.:)
     
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  19. MadamBelle
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    MadamBelle Active member

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    #19 MadamBelle, Sep 18, 2017
    What's brown and sickly?



    A stick
     
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