The Wife Has Turned

THAT is the whole chemistry of why chastity denial works.

Your non orgasmic state is high in the 'happy hormones', Serotonin, Oxytocin and Dopamine.
When a male orgasms with a climax, the levels of those hormones are drastically reduced and replaced by others, which cause you to go off sex and have a "downer". It can take hours, days or even a couple of weeks to gradually return to the previous "happy high".

This is result of our evolution.
Males are more likely to ensure the survival of their genes to future generations if they have multiple partners. So, once you've impregnated a female and have had that happy experience of an orgasm, it's time to move on to another female to increase your chances. If she was fertile and you've given her your sperm, there's nothing more for you to do. Losing your happy hormones for a short period makes it easier for you to move on and keep spreading your genes.

In the modern context, not having a full orgasm maintains your happy hormones, which make you more likely to stay with and be devoted to your partner. Because you don't go off sex she's also much more likely to have multiple orgasms, just having one orgasm every time she wants sex can be sufficient benefit.
You are happier for longer periods of time because you don't lose your happy hormones, and she's happy because you stay attentive to her for longer periods of time.
Win-win for both of you all as a result of avoiding that male hormone disruptive full orgasm.

 

Congratulations. Hope you guys have a fun journey together.

I have to say when I first read the headline I was like "the wife has turned.... To what the dark side of the force?!" Lol sorry my first thought was of star wars

 

That sounds like you have a session of at least three months starting ...
Well, you did ask for it!

I too have those fantasies. They're more desires, needs even. The thing is, you usually can't rush your partner when it comes to kink that you've been dreaming about for a lifetime before they were even aware of it existing as a thing. My wife and I have been doing male chastity for a decade, every year we get deeper into it, and she's eagerly doing things that I wouldn't even have dared try to discuss with her when we started, and that was after a relatively vanilla first decade together. It can't be rushed - I've had a set of three butt plugs hidden under the bed, waiting for the opportunity to introduce them... for three months!

We're now at the stage that me being locked up is my "normal". It feels strange and uncomfortable now if I'm unlocked for more than a day, and I can tell that she similarly breathes a sigh of relief and is much more content when I'm caged again.
It's never the complete "real deal" though. That's good, not bad, as even when you think you've got there, there's always another direction to explore!

 

I get what you're saying and I think wives are a bit on a different wavelength. My wife tends to humor me, but not be 100% behind some of my suggestions. I'm a bit surprised, but she seems to be behind the chastity idea. For a few reasons I think. 1) I say it will not impact me having sex with her. 2) I wrote an agreement that put a lot of things on the table. Things she wanted (like more help in what she does outside the house, more chores, more affection, no fighting, total service). 3) I confessed to some weaknesses (like masturbation and porn). I committed to not doing any of that while in chastity.

She mentioned that she felt like I was trying to persuade her. In that she was correct and I told her so. I told her, actually I wasn't trying to persuade her. Rather it was more. I was pleading with her. I really want to experience my life in complete service to her. Chastity will keep me focused on her needs. Not masturbating (it was almost every day if we weren't fooling around), would keep me on edge and also focused only on her. I apologized for pleading but I just laid it all out for her. Don't get me wrong, I'm not weak or submissive so me saying I was pleading carried some weight.

Other than laying out my thoughts, I also agreed that I wouldn't pester her. It's completely up to her. There were some basic things that defined the experience to me and were important. 24x7 chastity with release for cleaning and having sex with her. Otherwise, locked. Minimum 3 months but she agreed to 6.

I cleaned the bathroom this weekend. I mean real clean. Top to bottom, even waxed the cabinets. Bought a nice plant, organized her cabinet, replaced a light in the closet. She tried to thank me, I told her not to. I thanked her for allowing me to serve her. I think she woke up to it then. This chastity thing has some big perks for her and will definitely bring us closer together.

So my suggestion for the two of you (although you know what's best for your relationship): Be honest with her. Do make it about her but admit to what you want. And don't hesitate. Also, don't go the day on/day off way. It's not the same thing. All that is is a little kinky game that you use as foreplay. It's all or nothing (all allowing for her needs though). See how that goes.

 

Thanks for sharing!

 

I think once they get a taste, it's hard to stop even if they sort of want it. My wife wants sex and wants me to cum. But then again, she has seen what locking up and not cumming does. She's kind of stuck, a little confused, She doesn't understand why I would give something like that up for her. She feels guilty wanting me to give it up yet I think she does. Anyway, good luck, congrats? I suppose. Although is it really something to congratulate someone on. It does reach a point of no return. Once you step over the line, that's it. Enjoy, and thanks for the update.

 

Sure sounds like things are progressing for you. Thanks for sharing your story.

 

It took my wife some time as well. But now she really loves it. I must be caged all the time. If not she does get upset. Mind you... health comes first though. She knows that if there is any issues I must take it off and deal with any problem related to it. But after I MUST lock up again. Nice to hear your wife is embracing it all. You created a monster. But it is so worth it.