Is FLR reverse patriarchy? I read an old topic about some "1950 good housewife" handbook. Everyone in the comment section was offended by the role assigned to 1950s housewives. But isn't FLR just the same system only with the genders being swapped? In fact FLR is much more extreme than what was in for women in that handbook. Housewives don't wear chastity belts or kiss their husband's feet or execute commands when he snaps his fingers. If men can be happy in a FLR, why is it assumed that a traditional housewife is necessarily being subjugated by her husband instead of being happy in her role?
Patriarchy is a societal structure, not an individual relationship structure. What most people object to is the expectation that women fill a certain role. There is nothing wrong with them choosing that role as long as it's their choice. I don't think of my FLR as being a reversal of societies expectations as men assuming these roles has become more common and main stream. One of my good friends is a stay at home dad, while I am a successful entrepreneur. Obviously I don't know what goes on behind closed doors, but I doubt that his relationship is an FLR or that male chastity is involved.
I think patriarchy is mostly an imaginary system where men dominate most aspect of society. Reality is completely different, you just said men assuming female roles is being more mainstream, I think it's more tolerated but not really mainstream but there isn't a system that is there to favor men over women like a dictatorship. For example if your friend had a divorce, I highly doubt he would get to keep the house, the children, half his wife wealth and a good alimony, the judge would tell him to get a job It would be different if the gender were swapped. Now if his wife is the sole breadwinner she has tremendous power and authority over him even if he wouldn't admit it, he's definitely in a FLR even if there is no sexual aspect to it. My point was that he deliberately accepted to take this role and I'm sure everyone on this board will praise him for letting his wife being the leader of the household, but then why are housewives looked down then?
How gender affects divorce is also changing. The state I live in everything is split equally between partners in regards to financial assets. Generally the bread winner doesn't support a former spouse beyond this. Obviously the bread winner accumulates those assets and is giving up half of what they earned under the premise it was earned as a couple. This process is completely gender blind. Kids do end up with moms more often than dads, but that is also not automatic. A male relation of mine also the stay at home dad just got divorced and was awarded custody of the kids. His wife does pay child support, but not alimony. I also don't think housewives are looked down upon. Obviously there are people that do, but as a general perception in common culture it is a respected position.