Must Choose My Own Punishment

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by barbara desmonsche, Jun 22, 2010.

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  1. barbara desmonsche
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    barbara desmonsche Junior Member

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    Even though i am trying very hard to please my "Wife-Mistress-Keyholder-Goddess" & love of my life, i can still manage to screw up & disappoint her. Last week i had to go to a meeting at a building where they use a metal detector. There was a meeting there once before & i had switched from my stainless device back to my CB2000 with a numbered key tag. Well, i was allowed out of the metal one again for the meeting, but i was in a rush & didn't adorn the plastic device that day.

    When i saw Mary for lunch she had asked me if i was locked, but i had to tell her no. i could tell by the look on her face that she was disappointed with my choice of not following instructions. She is taking a class & buried with studying, so she said i had to figure out how i was to be punished on my own. i have been paddled & flogged in the past for infractions, but she has no time for that with school right now.

    Punishment is supposed to be something you dislike, so i need to find something that will teach me an important lesson so i do not repeat it. Now i didn't pleasure myself while unlocked & had immediately relocked myself when i returned from work that day, so the punishment will be simply for being "unlocked without permission". My wife doesn't really have guidelines or a list of punishments, so i am asking other forum members for help by listing possible consequences for me.

    What do all of you think should happen for my display in being irresponsible by not locking up?

    i will show this post to my wife so she can choose the punishment later. If it helps, i already do many of the chores at home so adding to the chore list wouldn't be punishment. i have not been allowed to have an orgasm since the end of May & do not have any regular schedule, Mary doesn't like one & enjoys being random about it. It's already been established that i am not getting one until she is done with school in July, so i must wait at least that long already.

    Any ideas are greatly appreciated, thank you.

    barbara
     
  2. Slave_Scott
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    Slave_Scott Owned and Controlled By Mistress Shar

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    barbara,
    Well I don't know if this is as much a punishment or just sucking up to your lovely Wife-Mistress.
    Seeing as she is so overwhelmed with school and probaly verry tierd I think you should be giving her lenthy massages every evening so she is able to relax and unwind from the stresses of the day. This way I believe she would feel a lot more appreciated. :rolleyes:
     
  3. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    There's a program called Fond Of Writing. Take a look at it, and also the 'grounding' option. This can keep you occupied without much effort needed by the KH except in checking up on you.
     
  4. cockislocked
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    cockislocked Senior Member

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    might i suggest that you do the task or tasks that She most dislikes. For example i hate and i mean hate ironing, so when i get punished i often find a huge amount of ironing appears...
     
  5. barbara desmonsche
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    barbara desmonsche Junior Member

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    If i didn't already give her regular massages i would definitely try your idea. :)


    That is a very interesting site, i love the concept. Too bad it requires payment to join, i will have to give serious thought to it. Thank you for the name of it.


    This is probably already in the works considering she gave me a shopping list tonight. Tomorrow after work i am to go food shopping for her, she is very busy.


    Thanks for the ideas, i will show them to her later.
     
  6. Celtic Queen
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    Celtic Queen Senior Member

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    For clarity, I'd just like to add here that hub is the owner of the clothing that he is forced to iron..........................
     
  7. Celtic Queen
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    Celtic Queen Senior Member

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    Barbara,

    I punish hub in a number of ways and it can absolutely depend on how I feel at the time. When he does something that requires redress and I am annoyed, tired, busy etc, he gets a few very sharp spanks with a wooden hairbrush. There is no erotic play involved so he doesnt get chance to build any kind of endorphins up so it does really hurt. His last spanking was for touching himself without my permission and three very hard blows on his bottom was quick and effective. If there is a more behavioural re adjustment that is needed, I give it some thought and make it more creative. He has spent time in certain stress positions to reflect on his actions. For example, when he is being negative, I have left him in an uncomfortable stress position with a fish hook device that pulls the corners of his mouth up - as if he is smiling. He has covered this in his blog if you want his perspective on it.

    Kind of a kinky "naughty step" I suppose!

    My view is that it is important to separate submission and service (shopping for her and massages) from both discipline (chastity, T & D) and actual punishment for transgressions which you have committed - hub was punished for the very same thing, ie rushing out with out his device, and he has never forgotten since.
     
  8. barbara desmonsche
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    barbara desmonsche Junior Member

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    Dear Celtic Queen,

    Thank you so much for the well thought out reply, it has made me rethink the situation i am in. The way you punish your husband makes sense from the deterring certain behavior, point of view. If Mary had time i am sure i would have suffered the consequences by now. The problem right now is that i need to do something that can be accomplished on my own with Mary just verifying that the punishment was carried out.

    Maybe the uncomfortable stress position will be one that works. i have done self bondage in the past so setting up something & leaving Mary to complete her studying should be easy. i would think that a set amount of time, like after i am set up until she is done with her work, i can remain in the position for her. It sounds like a great idea, i will have to run it past her to see if she approves.

    Thanks again & take care.

    Respectfully, barbara
     
  9. Celtic Queen
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    Celtic Queen Senior Member

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    I'm sure you'll get there. One thing that did occur to me was that if your Lady is busy - and obviously a woman of letters, why not ease the KH burden a little and attempt to create a document for her which details what are expected behaviours, undesireable ones and classes of discipline and punishment? One thing that comes across from the threads on here time and again is how men don't realise that keyholding does take time and effort. I have yet to read a believable example of where a woman has introduced a man to this lifestyle and the upshot of that is that it is not difficult to get resentful sometimes of going along with chastity only to find that suddenly, not only does all the responsibility rest on the KH's shoulders but also where there is a failure (for instance cheating the device) it isn't difficult to understand why the KH would just think it is all a little bit too much like hard work and throws in the towel - and that, Barabara, you obviously don't want. So, why not make it easier for her? You probably have a good idea of what she expects of you, what requires sharp correction and what needs loving maintenance and discipline so have a go at getting it out in black and white and then present it - respectfully - to her for discussion. We have just done this as a "behavioural contract" and it was a useful exercise to "out" all those hidden assumptions that always lurk.

    Good luck!
     
  10. cockislocked
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    cockislocked Senior Member

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    Barbara do you have a favourite tv show? If so perhaps your Wife should tie you to a chair with your back to the tv with the sound si low you can't really hear it (to add to your frustration of not knowing quite what is happening) for the duration of the show.
     
  11. cockislocked
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    cockislocked Senior Member

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    So.... The maternity tops they are for me?? :)
     
  12. Celtic Queen
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    Celtic Queen Senior Member

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    If you misbehave, you might just find yourself in a nice maternity smock next time I chain you to the ironing board xx
     
  13. barbara desmonsche
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    barbara desmonsche Junior Member

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    Hi again....

    It appears that my wife may have chosen 2 ways of how to punish me, but it isn't definite yet. The first method may be what Celtic Queen suggested, the strict bondage position. i had mentioned it to her after your post Celtic Queen, & she was amused. The second one will be a combination of a few things added to my to do list. Not chores, but just making them more memorable.

    Regarding the bondage position, she knows that the kennel cage we have is not very big & doesn't allow much movement. Even then, she likes to make sure that i am even more restricted while inside it by using wrist & ankle restraints to secure me to the bars. i had spent close to 1 hour in it & couldn't wait to be released. 1 hour may not sound like much, but between the position i was in & the small size of the cage, it was rough.

    A Domme friend of ours had mentioned that if she was the one that had to decide what punishment i was to receive, i'd be face down on the carpet on my knees, wrists cuffed to my ankles forcing my ass into the air, & then left that way overnight. i am not sure what Mary thinks of that one.

    In making my chores more memorable, she sent a text to me at work saying that she plans to add the points of intrigue from my CB2000 to my new device. Along with the spikes, i am to have a butt plug inserted & then it's off to do the food shopping while dressed en femme. It sounds like heaven in a way, but i am terrified to wander through the supermarket for an hour or more & buy a shopping cart full of food & household supplies dressed in a skirt, blouse, makeup, wig, corset, & heels. i will not have a winter coat to hide in. :eek:

    i am hoping that she will allow me to just wear an androgynous outfit, but we will see.
     
  14. cockislocked
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    cockislocked Senior Member

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    i'd be face down on the carpet on my knees, wrists cuffed to my ankles forcing my ass into the air, & then left that way overnight

    As long ad someone comes and checks you regularly for numbness and coldness. It sounds good but i suspect it difficult to do...... Being in bondage for long time needs careful monitoring! Like you said an hour in a cage feels longer! i was forced to kneel and face a wall for 45 mins. my legs got very numb!
     
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