How real is your FLR

Ours is pretty real, and getting more real all the time. But it really varies moment to moment. Sometimes she still wants me to make some decisions, drive on road trips, make the first move sexually. But she is highly paid and pretty much controls the finances. I'm a househusband and cater to her needs pretty much all the time.

We have been in the swing lifestyle for years but lately she has pretty much laid it out: She doesn't want to share me with any women anymore but she does want to continue having boyfriends. I have a tattoo over HER cock with her name and a key design. She occasionally locks me in chastity but she finds it a hassle because she wants to get it out to play with often.

 

Twice this year, once during extended travel, and recently due to medical reasons, I have not been able to fully submit or serve her. She missed it as much as I did.

I now realize that submitting and serving is not a fetish or sexual game. It is a core need for me.

She Also realizes she likes the control, she likes to be served. It is no longer a game for her. It is her expectation.

To take it further, I have committed to communicate with her if something is not working for me. This relieves any worries she may have and allows her to explore limits without undue concern.

We communicate more now than any time in our relationship. Due to the increased communication, we can also exercise our complete trust.

Our FLR is real in the best way.

 

You are being honest and that is rare. As time goes on, you may progress from “do me” to “what I do for you”.

 

For us the first step that made it very real was when she told me she would control the money and I would have a weekly allowance. I was already dressing by then but that was a private thing, intimate and between us. Moving me to an allowance forced me to think about her control several times a day even when she wasn’t there.

 

What is the definition of 'real' in an FLR? If you have a contract, how many punishments the sub will get, how often the sub is allowed to orgasm?

What is the finalizing thing that makes it more real than others FLR?

I'm not sure exactly what the question is. But anyway, our FLR is very real to me because it's always present in our daily life together. My sub and I are not into a total power exchange, but I do have a final say in our decisions.

When the children are here, we mainly play in the bedroom and we leave the mistress/slave thing for the weekends we are without the children. When we are without the children, my sub will be naked more and explicitly serve me when I want him to. He does traditional gentlemanly things for me like taking my coat and opening doors, and letting me choose where we eat or go in general when we go out.

We're both not very much into corporal punishment, the only punishment my sub can get is an orgasm if he forgets his place and for him that is very unpleasant. But so far he has pleased me enough to have only been punished once in three months. We do spankings and CBT but only for pleasure and not for punishment, as I am a dominant but not a sadist at all.

My sub does wear his chastity cage whenever I desire it, including when the children are here as we are dressed when they are here anyway. He does not enjoy the cage much, but he wears it because I desire him to. That exites me, because it is a truly submissive act.

But yeah basically my FLR means my sub is to spoil and pamper me as much as possible, and in return he gets lots of affection and tease and denial. We have only contracted our hard limits and that's enough for us.

 

@MRS.Lilith, I think you have perfectly answered the question. It is indeed not about the "grade" punishments or "amounts of orgasms" etc. It might be about how FLR is consistently embedded in your life style and that both partners acknowledge that explicitly towards eachother.

Therefore, my Love and I are not in FLR yet, as we did not acknowledge it explicitly towards eachother. My Love likes - and perhaps unaware expects - that I treat her like a "little princess" (her own words). I am running tasks and try to serve her as much as possible, so that she can deliver all her attention to fulfillment of her daily passion. We do not have a total power exchange as well, despite my Love take always the final decisions on important issues. Since I am chasted and my Love is taking full control over releases, I strictly have to follow her instructions. Recently she punished me once I did not took of my cage immediately after she instructed and told me that she was very unhappy with that behaviour.

So, the thing is that we are living more a FLR life than we both may think. However, we did not explicitly speak about that yet. For me the "R" in "FLR" represents at least mutual understanding and respect for eachother. So, there will be a need to go for "round 2" about our life style and discuss FLR to agree upon it in some way.

 

My flr is more than real, it's a 24/7 wonderful experience, the most intense one !!! we started playing some femdom games but i noticed my wife was not 100% satisfied. I wondered why. Now i know why. She has always been a dominant alpha women and i've always been a normal funny guy confident with girls and with myself. I've dated many girls before knowing my wife. And i was not a beta male but i've adopted that status by pleasuring her always more and more. I exactly remember when she proposed me a 24/7 female led wedding including all sacrifices, humiliations and self-denial which such relationship is based on. It was the new year night, 5 years ago. We were both drunk and tried to feel the exciting shivers of doing "adult games" in the dark of my parked car outside the club. Using all her female power, elegance, disarming beauty and innate cunning she firmly hand my balls and squeezed them. She stated she wanted to be my dominant wife, my unconventional mistress and queening me 24/7. I accepted. That's why now i can say my flr is totally real and it goes beyond a simple bdsm hot bedroom game. She queens me whenever and wherever, in public and at home. Real slavery with a real femdom mistress. And it's just for me, always available every day of my life. What's better in life?