Last weekend after nearly 3 months of 24/7 permanent chastity with only two orgasms sub hubby felt into a kind of chastity frustration depression. Yea, it’s hard for all of us these days I have to watch him doing chores, buying groceries and being in chastity. So I was not in the mood for kinky stuff the last two weeks, cause of permanent kid-overkill and homeoffice stress. So he didn’t get any release or teasing for a while. All this this ended in a depressed subby who didn’t want get out of bed and was very grumpy and not in the mood for chastity any more. After a while and a little soul-care for him we talked about it and had a very very short night...if you know what I mean....but he didn’t got out of his chastity cage. Even in hard times it’s important to be a consequent Keyholder. I think he will stay inside for a while longer to remember him who is in charge...hihi Stay healthy!! TKIM
Good on you for being such a persistent keyholder! To me, reassurance is so important. When life gets stressful, I tend to get completely turned off by kink and I start to feel a little ridiculous wearing my chastity device. That all gets fixed whenever my wife tells me how much she enjoys it and wants me to stay locked.
I can understand your husband's feelings. My cage experience started as a way to stop a masturbation habit not a sub situation. With everything going on I have totally lost interest but to be honest it was starting to happen before the crisis. My wife has grown to love when I am locked and I would really like to give it up. Neither of us have any interest in turning it into a sub relationship.
And you shouldn't feel like you have to! The chastity community tends to link itself so closely to D/s (with many even considering it as one and the same), but it definitely doesn't have to be that way.
Agree. Not all chastity relationships are D/s. Ours (my wife and I) is not. I don’t desire it and she wouldn’t like it. But we both DO like the chastity cage for extended, sometimes VERY extended (weeks) of foreplay. OP. I will also add that just a little bit of attention and focus means all the world to me. “Lock and forget” is no fun. I also understand she isn’t, and I can’t expect her to be, sexually minded all the time. But being locked up with the occasional tease and awareness is enough to keep me happily locked until she is ready to have me out.
Thanks for your reply. We do not feel pressure to change it into dom/sub. My issue is I have lost interest in the cage but my wife now loves it when I wear it and it no longer interests me. Just wearing it because she likes it for various reasons.
Don't they say that chastity doesn't start until you want to take it off? You say that neither of you want to turn it into a sub relationship, but aren't you submitting by agreeing to stay locked even though you don't want to exactly because she does want you to?
Stay locked and "forgot" can really cause depressions at us as humble servants to our better halves. In particular during these days it is crucial to maintain the balance for KH's and sub's. In particular these days disbalancing of emotions can easily occur. You were just exposed to the effects of that... As chastity / FLR is "playing intensively with the chemicals in our servant brains", things like the current circumstances can easily disbalance these chemicals. So, besides the "beloved consequentness of our keyholders" as servants we do need a bit of stimulance to keep the chemicals in our brains working in such a way, that we stay committed... Therefore, T&D is the "fuel" to keep this process ongoing and unlocking or a lot of kink are not necessary for that at all. Like @Mrloched said "a little fondle" can do these miracles already…
I guess you can look at it that way but I see it more as doing it to make her happy. If I told her I wanted it off she would remove it even though she prefers the cage on. My cage is comfortable and I mostly forget it is there so it is not really an issue other than I unfortunately lost the excitement it used to have for me.