As some of you know, Mistress is punishing me for selfishly wanting to end being her slave back in February. All that after she generously allowed me to climax a whole seven months before I should have. Mistress had to go out of town on a business trip Thursday morning and before she left, she locked me in my maid uniform and gave me a (long) list of chores that needed to be done before her return on Saturday evening. Yeah! I do not know if I am more excited about seeing her or finally being able to shower. She will be back in about 12 hours! One of the things on the list was to take out all of the garbage. She also ordered me to clean out our storage room so there was much garbage to be rid of. We live in a large apartment complex with community dumpsters at the ends of each parking lot. Our building is in the exact center of one of these lots. Of course. Mistress has never made me go outside en femme before. I think someone saw me even though I waited until after 1:00 AM to do it. It was embarrassing enough just to walk to the dumpster without anyone outside. Who knows who could peek out a window at that moment? Then things got worse. As I was walking back and almost got to the steps, a car turned the corner and I was caught in the headlights. It was wonderfully humiliating. My heart began to race and I was scared to death. My first thought was, I only wish Mistress was here to enjoy my first introduction to public humiliation. My second thought was, RUN!!! So I ran up the stairs and into the apartment. It was an incredibly exhilarating experience. My heart is still racing with excitement. Now I am in a dilemma. Part of me wants to suffer more public humiliation as the total embarrassment was a rush. Another part of me wants to never have that happen ever again.
Maybe you'd feel better about it if the exposure wasn't so close to home. If it's a stranger that spots you, you wouldn't have any long-lasting repercussions from an incident of being seen. The :danger: and thrill is still there. Something that might feel more fun would be a scenario like if She dropped you off at on end of a faraway mall parking lot and waited for you in Her auto (engines running) at the other end - making you walk all that way. Do it in a town that's not near your residence. Know what I mean? Or raise the stakes and walk through the mall - yikes!
Lauren1fem, Thank you for your response. Actually, I am not too worried about running into someone I know at our apartment complex as I live in an area where nobody seems to know anyone. It is a large metropolitan area and everybody is rather self-absorbed, including me. To be honest we have been here three years and if the police asked me to describe the person (people?) who live across the hall from us I could not do it. Mistress met them once, but only in passing and to say, Hi. I do believe that Mistress is preparing me to spend more time en femme as she stated recently that if I lose my job because of the rotten economy I would be en femme 24/7 until I found another one. This raises two questions: 1) what can I do Monday to be fired? 2) What can I do to be fired and still get unemployment? I really enjoyed the thought of your suggestion to be made to walk through a parking lot by myself. Mistress has made it clear, though, that I am not allowed to suggest scenarios. She says that she knows what is best and will do this her way. Who am I to argue?
Dear chastiman, i think we all have experienced a similar moment when stepping out for the first time and your emotions are quite understandable. You will get used to and in no time you will feel more comfortable outside, rest assured. You should not ask yourself what you can to to get fired and remain unemployed. Rather you'd ask how can you be more femme without being fired? It happens not very often but it is not impossible either. Hugs, maid katrin
Maid Katrin, Thank you for your response. I was only joking about trying to be fired. I only said that because Mistress told me that if I became unemployed that I would be en femme 24/7. I said it tongue in cheek. Mistress would never do anything to jeopardize my job so I never go to work feminized. The only thing I am made to do at work is wear my collar and no one who sees it ever has any idea what it really is. I love reading your posts and have learned much from you. Thank you.
Dear chastiman, of course i did not seriously believe that you are looking for a way to get fired LOL ... However, there's always to be more feminine 24/7 without risking your job. You can be in sissy underwear at all times just to start with. I am sure your Mistress has something like that in mind already. It's nice to read you learned from me but just remember, we can always learn from each other ;-) Hugs, maid katrin
Actually I am always in a CB 6000 and diapered even at work. When Mistress first introduced me to the CB line, I had a huge problem with one side popping out when I got cold down there. Mistress believed the extra bulk of a disposable diaper would act like insulation and keep everything nice and warm. That plus the plastic backing, which also traps heat, has solved that problem.
Gulp Well, Mistress finally came home and I told her about what happened. Basically, her response was, Good, get used to it. Apparently, in the near future I will be living as a gurl whenever I am off from work. Mistress has to travel occasionally due to her job. My job has a rather generous vacation plan. I was also told that whenever Mistress has to travel out of town I would be expected to take that time off from work so I can be locked in my maid uniform while she is gone. I will have to make sure the house is spotless before her return. Mistress said that she had this planned for me as my punishment if I ever put her collar back on. Mistress also said that since I begged her so desperately to let me wear it again and I promised not to go back this time that she expects me to keep my promise. I am so excited, yet also a little apprehensive. *shiver*