Becoming my wife's slut

My Goddess took another step forward in finding her Domme capabilities today.

She works from home and I'm currently between jobs. She instructed me to put on my frilly sissy knickers, a satin apron, my six inch platform red glitter pleasers and a prostate stimulating butt plug. I was told to report to her once dressed. (There are photos of today's outfit in my gallery)

I was then given a list of housework chores to complete.

Wow. She's never been so direct with her orders before. I was very turned on.

I raced through the tasks and as she heard me putting the vacuum cleaner away, she called me into her office.

She lifted my apron, revealing by inverted cage.

"Where are the pink knickers?" She asked.

Shit. In my excitement, I'd forgotten to put them on.

She called me closer and told me to remove the apron. She grabbed my balls, holding one in each hand.

She told me that she was very happy with the housework, squeezing the balls with just the right amount of pain to excite me. My clit tried to get hard under the cage. Then she said she was disappointed that I'd not dressed as she wanted.

At that point the pain in my left ball increased exponentially. She squeezed it so hard. I nearly collapsed. She's never hurt me that much before. I was forced to safeword. She released me immediately.

It's the first time I've used the safeword. I'm glad we've crossed that threshold. For me safewords are important. They need to be tested. I need to trust that she'll respect it. She needs to know that I'll use it if things go too far. We both need to know that there's no failure in it being used. Using it and respecting if engenders mutual trust. She also now has a better idea of my absolute limit regarding pain. That means I'll probably spend more time closer to that limit than I previously have. I'm excited at that.

I'm also, weirdly, excited at the thought that we might reach safeword using scenarios again in the future. I want to be treated harshly right up to my limits. We're now starting to find where they are.

Very happy maggot. Albeit with a throbbing left ball.

Oh. My Goddess also hinted at the prospect of some naughty play in the bedroom tonight after dinner. I'm intrigued to see what she has planned. We have some new toys that haven't been used yet. I can't count on her using them. Whatever she wants to do, I'll only find out when she starts to do it. I like it like that

 

We played after dinner. I was unlocked, teased to the edge, then I helped my Goddess get off using my fingers on her g-spot while she used the rose clit sucker.

I was then allowed to fuck my butt hole with a dildo for a while. She even took over at one point. I must have pleased her a lot today at it's rare that she'll participate.

No chance of being allowed to do it long enough to find out if I can have an anal orgasm. I'm absolutely not going to be allowed to cum for at least 90 days from when we started this. The ticker below should show how long I've been denied so far. Barely a third of the way through .

I was told to stop after a couple of minutes.

I thought that would be the end of it and went to put my cage back on.

But then the surprises. We have a new cage and I was told I could try that on for the first time if I wanted to. I hate being given "if I want to" type instructions - I'd much rather be given absolute directions. Does anyone else feel the same?

Regardless of the instruction irritation, I jumped at the chance and retrieved it from our toy draw. It's another FRRK Chinese inverted cage, but this has a kind of plunger shaped steel cup behind the inverter cylinder, and no urethral tube.

I put it on, and it feels very comfortable. I'm going to sleep in it and try it through the day tomorrow.

One more surprise remained. It comes with a screw on silicone penis. It's quite soft. I asked if I could try attaching it. Goddess said yes, but I couldn't try using it on her as it was getting late.

Undeterred I screwed it on. See the photo below for what it looks like. Wow!

Here's something I didn't expect. You may have seen the psychological experiment that they do sometimes on amputees with missing arms. The get them to lay their remaining arm out on a table next to a box with a mirror on the side, then push their stump into a hole in the box. The amputee can then see a reflection of their remaining arm in exactly the place their missing arm would be. Then from the other side of the table, the person running the experiment pretends to touch their missing arm while touching their real arm in the same way. The subjects report feeling real sensation in their missing arm.

Well, after barely seeing or feeling my dick in nearly 40 days, this silicone dick, in exactly the spot that my dick ought to be, is somehow tricking my brain into thinking it's real, despite the stupid pink colour. I can't stop touching it. It's so weird. It really feels like it's mine.

I've got to sleep with it attached. That's going to be weird.

URL=https://www.chastitymansion.com/for...otos/new-cage-with-screw-in-attachment.65912/][/URL]
New cage with screw in attachment by MaggotNub on Chastity Mansion

 

I think something changed yesterday. For the better. I'm still processing, but I'll write something now about the day and how it ended.

The day started with me waking in the new cage. (pics in gallery)

We always have a kiss and cuddle in bed immediately after the alarm sounds. My Goddess was very sleepy. It was mostly a cuddle. Kisses were pecks and she completely abstained from touching my balls, something she usually does. I know better than to ever try and touch any of her more sensitive areas without invitation during these cuddles, and I'm almost always never invited. This day was no different.

In short, awake, sleepy non sexual cuddle, perfunctory kisses, then on with the day.

Goddess had her bath, got dressed and went down to her office to work. I remained upstairs naked.

Sometime later, my phone beeped - Come downstairs wearing only your frilly pink sissy knickers. I immediately complied and met her in her office. She approved of my attire, gave my balls a quick squeeze and gave me some tasks for the day, one of which was an errand outside of the house. She made it clear that the knickers were to be worn all day, under my normal clothes if going out. While in the house, unless we had visitors and until our daughter came home late in the afternoon, I was to remain wearing just the frilly knickers.

I'm supposed to dislike being forced into sissy attire. That was kind of the role play we evolved in the beginning. But the truth is, I really do like it, and can't pretend otherwise. Heck - I actually bought these knickers myself without even consulting the wife. What I really do like and appreciate though, is when she tells me what items she wants me to wear. It reassures me that I have her approval and that I'm always acting within her control.

There really wasn't much interaction with my Goddess for the rest of the day, apart from one lovely moment when I came home from my errand and met her in the kitchen. Our daughter, a teenager who disapproves of any suggestion that Mum and Dad have a sex life, vanilla or otherwise, was already home and upstairs in her room. My goddess called me close, had me drop my trousers and caressed my balls and bottom over the top of the frilly pink satin knickers. It was exciting keeping alert to any sound of movement from the upstairs rooms, and being ready to pull my trousers back up at a moments notice. Sadly, it was over all too soon and I prepared dinner for us.

After dinner my Goddess had a hairdresser visit to cut her hair along with our daughter's. I made my excuses and went upstairs to the bedroom, honestly not expecting much for later given the very sparse amount of teasing she had lavished on me during the day.

I like to be prepared for any eventuality, so took the time to give myself an enema in case anal play might be on the menu. I then got into bed wearing just the frillies, and still locked in the new cage of course.

Goddess eventually came up to the room and I complemented her on her new haircut - She had got it done much shorter than usual - I liked it a lot.

She got into bed and approved that I was still dressed as she had specified. We had a brief cuddle and I got the feeling there wasn't going to be any sexual activity. I was preparing to accept that when she told me to screw the attachable penis dildo onto my new cage. Well, I guess I read her signals wrong!

I jumped up, retrieved it from the toy draw, made some jokes about Go Go Gadget cock, and the bionic penis, and hastily screwed it onto the front plate of my inverted cage (pictures are in my gallery).

She had me lay flat on my back and clambered on.

Now, before I go further, we've talked about purchasing a harness and dildo for me to use on her, but haven't came close to pulling the trigger on that. My Goddess, who started this journey without any kinky fantasies or background had stated she didn't object to the idea, but wasn't ready yet.

That the new cage came with a detachable dildo was kind of an unexpected bonus - But I should be clear - It's a tiny dildo - Maybe 3.5 inches long and less than an inch in diameter. Perhaps it seemed less threatening, as it surprised me that she was willing to give it a go so soon.

Anyhow, what really surprised me was how she wanted to start using it with next to no foreplay at all.

She has some mobility issues and it was clear that the combination of the tiny dildo - She had trouble getting it in and keeping it there, combined with some pain, meant she wasn't enjoying it. We tried some other positions, but due to how short it was, I couldn't really get it going without getting very close to her, and she couldn't take the weight transfer when that happened.

I should say that for me, the experience was a total mind fuck. Fucking her with an artificial penis, exactly where mine should be was a real trip. I felt so submissive - Exactly how I want to be.

So, due to the small size and her pain, we soon abandoned our first attempt at "foxing". We agreed that the size was the problem (Irony here - it projected about as far as my real penis does - I get 5.5 inches erect, the dildo was 3.5 inches, but it stood clear of my upper pubic area fat pad, whereas my real cock doesn't.) - We're going to research a decent harness for me to wear and she's going to pick a dildo to go with it. I've no hang ups about size - I expect it to be much bigger and more satisfying than my pathetic cock. I hope she chooses something that makes my tiny cock look even more inadequate than it really is.

So having given up the foxing, she was horny as hell, got out the clit sucker and told me to use my fingers on her G-Spot.

Well, this is when things happened. I must have nailed the G-Spot with absolute precision, because she had the most powerful orgasm I've seen her have in 26+ years. She even squirted all over my hand, and left a big wet patch on the bed. I licked my hand clean and fell back on the bed, shaking all over. It was like I absorbed some of her orgasm - My whole body trembled involuntarily. She told me to stop, but I couldn't. I don't know what it was - I didn't ejaculate, and it wasn't exactly an orgasm, at least it wasn't like any I'd ever had before.

Meanwhile, her orgasm totally wiped her out - She was spent, and just wanted the lights out and to go to sleep. Which is exactly what she did!

No teasing or any stimulation for me, coming after a day that had far less teasing that I've come to expect. The mind fuck of using a dildo on her in the exact place my dick should be. The orgasm transfer. Then the abandonment at the end.

Now to the bit I'm still processing - The whole impact of the day and the close to it have moved my submission up a level. I feel entirely "in my place" as it were. Arguably, yesterday was far more about her, and far less about me than any other since we started this, and it made me feel so fulfilled. I'm smitten with her on a whole new level. I couldn't stop telling her, and it didn't change after sleep. It's lunchtime now, the day after, and I want to worship her at her feet.

She truly is my Goddess. I love her so much.

Funny aside - As I attempted to unscrew the dildo from my cage to go and wash it, it completely separated from the threaded metal tube that is used to anchor it to the cage. Unless I can find a glue that can bond stainless steel to silicone, it's done. The cage is fine, but the tiny pink penis won't attach to the cage. That's 2 of my dicks she's got no further use for. What a superb irony.

Other Irony - When I came back from the bathroom with the broken dick, I asked her if I could insert a plug to sleep in. She said, "Yes, I was just about to tell you to do that.". How I wish I'd not said anything. Doing something for her, even if it is something I want to do, is so much more satisfying if she tells me to do it rather than me asking for it.

 

Is there such a thing a Domme drop?

We've had sexual interactions resulting in my Goddess having 6 orgasms in the last 7 days, building up to Wednesday night's truly huge squirting orgasm than induced some kind of cerebral orgasm in me. I said in the last post I felt something I'd never felt before. I don't know if there's a name for it, or if it was any kind orgasm at all, but I'm calling it a cerebral orgasm until I learn if it's a thing with a real name.

I received no physical stimulation during the scene, but felt amazing having shared her experience. I was allowed to sleep with a plug in, which I like.

So today, Thursday, she has given me practically no physical or verbal teasing. I've initiated a few cuddles or hugs throughout the day, but it's all been very one sided. I normally get my caged balls squeezed a lot. I think she touched them once briefly during the day.

I'd hoped we would play when we got to bed tonight, but she said she wanted a night off and wanted to watch TV in bed with me.

Now. I'm signed up to this. I've given her the power and agreed that she calls all the shots. I've encouraged her to be selfish. I'll endure this situation and tough it out. I'm serious about wanting to submit to her and to give her total control over my sexuality. I expect there to be tough times that are hard to cope with. I've even asked her to make things challenging for me. I want to prove my submission.

We finished watching our shows, had a perfunctory cuddle with a very brief kiss that I had to ask for, and that's it. She's gone to sleep.

Sometimes when she's not been feeling up for anything herself she'll assign me a kinky solo task. Maybe I'll have to play with our toys by myself, or she'll unlock me and instruct me to edge, that sort of thing. But tonight, nothing.

This is the most difficult moment I've had on this journey. I'm laying here trying to rationalize my thoughts and experience. I can't sleep. I last orgasmed (a real one) on October 6. I've been finding it easier to cope with the denial as time went on, right up until this moment.

I absolutely want to please her and will comply with her directions and commands. However, the lack of any stimulation for me in the last 24 hours is making this very hard.

I'm hoping that maybe one of two things could be happening with her.

Could Domme drop be a thing? Her orgasm was absolutely spectacular and unlike most we've created before. I'd be interested in any similar experiences from the rest of the community. If it's real, I'll take my abandonment as a badge of honour for having helped her achieve the orgasm that led to it.

Or maybe she's testing me. Deliberately amping up my frustration. If that's it, I'm up for the challenge. I want to please her so much.

My worst case scenario. Has she just forgotten about my predicament and hasn't given a moment's thought to how I'm feeling. I've doted on her all day and would like to think I'm at least noticed.

Maybe this is all part of what I should expect having committed to trying this lifestyle for 90 days. I can cope with it I think, as long as it's not prolonged. Maybe I'm being selfish and should focus more on her. It's frustrating because last night took my submission, love and dedication to her to a whole new level and now I feel cast into the abyss. I pray that whatever is happening is short lived.

When we started this, we agreed that it wouldn't work if I was thrown into a corner and forgotten about. We were clear in our understanding that she would need to focus some attention on teasing and arousing me, even if she didn't intend to use me.

Phase let this be temporary, a test or Domme drop.

Any feed back, guidance, similar accounts, sympathy, criticism, be careful what you wished for etc will be welcomed.

Frustrated maggot.

 

You know what? I'm a whiney little bitch.

I just remembered. We got a bunch of new punishment devices delivered a week or so and haven't yet used them. There's a flogger, a paddle, single core canes, 2, 5 and 8 core canes, a cane made out of some dense plastic rod, and a crop.

She had me kneel on the bed naked tonight and close my eyes while she took a couple of gentle practice swats with each of them and challenged me to guess which one she was using from feel and sound alone.

Somehow I forgot she did that when I wrote the post above.

Doesn't sound like no attention does it? I'm an idiot. Just because she didn't want any thing for herself, I go and feel all sorry for myself.

What a prissy little slut I am.

Ashamed maggot.

 

I've taken onboard the advice and have concentrated very hard on making it about her, putting my own needs aside.

We had a sexless weekend. In fact, it's been 6 days since she last came. That was the magnificent squirting orgasm I described in an earlier post.

I've kept my distance in terms of asking for anything and have focused on making her life as good as I can for her.

She asked at one point if I'd sneaked an orgasm in somewhere as I didn't seem to be as horny around her as I'd been previously. I took that as my opportunity to explain that no, I hadn't cheated, I was feeling very horny, but was working hard to not try and initiate any sex activity or focus on my needs. I wanted it to be all about her. I told her I wanted to please her in as many ways as i could, both sexually and non-sexually, but that aside from obvious household chores, I would await her instruction rather than initiate anything on my own initiative.

She asked how I felt. I told the truth in that I was missing her attention, and suggested I could cope as long as I was in her thoughts. Deliberately neglecting me to frustrate me - fine. Neglecting me because she didn't want to do anything -fine as long as she told me she had no use for me at that moment in time. Neglecting me because she forgot I existed, not fine.

She agreed that sounded reasonable and said she would take it on board.

Well tonight we came to bed and she told me that she still wasn't feeling horny herself, but had a surprise for me. She set a timer for an hour and had me lay back. Still in my cage.

She spent the whole hour alternating from tugging my balls in a way that causes the cage to move on my inverted penis, which feels great, to squeezing and hitting my balls very painfully.

It was wonderful, particularly because of its prolonged nature. When the timer went off she allowed me to unlock briefly to remove the inverter and had me lick it clean of plenty of pre cum before putting it back.

I noticed a real glint in her eye and a wicked smile when she realised how much some of what she was doing was hurting me.

I told her at the end that I wanted to please her and help her get off. She told me she didn't want to, but had enjoyed teasing and torturing me very much. She then kissed me and said she was going to sleep.

I feel very happy. I'm about as horny as I can get and frustrated at no opportunity to release, but that's what I signed up for and I'm not complaining. My last orgasm was October 6 and we agreed an initial period of 90 days denial with a review but not necessarily a release at the end.

I'm still absolutely committed to that agreement and am already fantasising about what she might do to mark the occasion. One of the very attractive fantasies is the thought of being restrained and subjected to a mammoth, Viagra supported edging session over several hours, not knowing what the outcome would be, denial, ruin or full release. I'm excited most at the prospect of finding out that she chose denial after multiple edges.

Whatever she decides to do at the end, my only hope is that she'll agree to continue keeping me in chastity and will continue using me as her submissive slut.

I feel very blessed tonight.

Happy frustrated maggot.

 

My Goddess and I agreed at the start of October to my request that she accept my submission and take full control of our sex life on her terms.

We also agreed to her leading the relationship overall and that she could use me as her submissive in any way she wanted to for activities both sexual and non sexual.

She's never fantasized about such a role and relationship before, but agreed to give it a go having done some reading of her own.

As a result, we agreed on a long initial period of chastity and orgasm denial for me, with the idea being to let her get used to being in charge while I went through an extended period to understand what it feels like as a lifestyle rather than a short term roleplay. We settled on a 90 day period with complete orgasm denial on my part. I'd have to be caged all the time, except for hygiene and for her to play.

I've been unlocked for her to edge me several times and once for PIV where I was not allowed to cum. There have been no ruined orgasms.

Today marks the 50th day since my last orgasm. It must be the longest I've ever gone since my first ever during puberty, and by quite some margin.

We had a talk tonight about how we are getting on and what our expectations are for post 90 days, with the caveat that our perspective may change between now and then.

We both agreed that its been a positive experience and we want to continue the dynamic. On the question of orgasm frequency - I stated that I don't expect to be relieved on day 90 unless she wanted it to happen. I said I imagined that I might have more frequent releases than every 90 days, and maybe she may experiment with different periods to see what my sub drop may be like.

But I finished that my expectations are irrelevant and that I wanted my orgasm frequency to be entirely decided upon and controlled by her.

I may have set myself up by remarking that she could make me wait a year or more if it was what she wanted. I honestly mean that too. I don't crave an orgasm after 50 days of stimulation more than I crave her having all of the power and control.

As long as she's happy to be in control, I'm happy to wait indefinitely. At least that's how I feel now.

 

My wife went away for the weekend and left me home alone all weekend. I was locked of course. She told me there was a key hidden somewhere in the house in case of emergency. I didn't need it.

Having the time away was useful in clarifying some of my thoughts on the experience so far.

Firstly I really missed her. Like crazy missed her. I was surprised how strong the feeling was. 50 days of denial have absolutely strengthened my emotional tether to her by a massive amount. I told her this when she returned this evening.

Secondly I came to realise that I need to make my submission real. That means accepting things I don't want. I need to feel that I really don't have choices about many things unless I want to put our relationship at risk. I've been guilty of asking for too much too frequently and focused on my needs for attention and kinky play.

So I had a talk with her tonight and vowed that I'm not going to ask her for any sexual contact from now on. I've frequently asked her to squeeze my balls as we've gone about our day for example.

While I'd love all manner of contact with her, I've realised that it has been about me demanding attention. Maybe I needed that arousal constantly in the first month or so? I certainly enjoyed it. But it wasn't submission to her and that's what I've really wanted all along.

She seemed a little challenged when I said that I think I need to have to experience things that I don't like for it to be real. I went further, submission has to be about accepting that I don't have a choice about things and I'll only feel like I've given her all the control when she puts her needs above mine without guilt. If I have to find a way to accept my fate when she directs things in a way I'd prefer not to, then I will. Submission is only real to me when we both have the confidence to take away my ability to choose how things could go.

She pondered on it for a while and asked if that meant she had to make my life miserable. No. Unless she wanted to, or it just happened as a consequence of her decisions. Of course she loves me and considers my needs and wants to make me happy, but she doesn't have to compromise her own wants and desires just because I want attention or to extend our play into new kinks.

How will she know what I want in the future she asked. My response was that my first desire is always to give her what she wants, whether that's sex play, or just to be left alone. She's absolutely free to ask me about what I might like, and she's also absolutely free not to. She's free to ignore anything I do suggest should she ever ask the question at all.

My supreme want, above all others, is to give myself to her for her use as she sees fit.

I think she understood. I'm going to keep very quiet from now on unless directly asked about what I would like.

When things are hard for me, most likely due to lack of attention, I'll channel the thoughts into a realisation that I'm delivering real submission as I wanted, and that I'm experiencing what a lack of choice and control really is. I think that will actually make it positive overall.

I'd like to get some standing rules from her so I know if there are things I can expect to have some autonomy on. For example, I quite often like to sleep with a plug in. I like it even more if she independently tells me to put one in. I need some guidance from her. Will I have autonomy to do that? Am I not allowed to use a plug unless explicitly commanded to by her? Should I ask her for permission, or am I not allowed to even ask?

We're going to need to work out how we approach these situations and define what she expects. She also needs to know she can change her mind on any of this at any time with impunity.

I feel this is an important stage and that I'm starting to recognise that I have to surrender my free will way further than I have so far.

Does this echo with anyone else's experiences on similar journeys? Is it a stage that many go through? How did it work out for you?

Maggot.

 

My Goddess treated me to some anal play tonight.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, we gave a very thick, ten inch dildo that she's going to take my pegging virginity with. I can train with it and other toys to get my body ready for the occasion. To date I've only managed to get it all the way in on one occasion. It was really uncomfortable and I've not managed to repeat it since. The best I can regularly manage is to get it halfway in with a lot of discomfort. So I'm continuing to train and stretch until I'm ready to gift her my virginity.

Recently another guy on here shared an experience about how his Domme used a fourteen inch dildo when pegging him. He described it as having a bulbous end that was challenging to get past his second hole when she thrust it deep.

I was intrigued so messaged him and asked about the dildo. He shared where he got it from, and I ordered one. That dildo came today. All 14 inches of it. It's not as thick as my ten inch one, and it's quite flexible in comparison.

I can only get about half of the ten inch one in so far, but I've been trying to stretch myself. We've not done any pegging yet. My wife has said that she intends to take my anal virginity with the ten inch, and that I'll need to take it to the hilt when she does.

I'm allowed to use it hand held for training. She only counts mounting me with it in a harness as popping my cherry.

So when she saw the new dildo the same as his she was impressed with it's length and actually said she wanted to try it in her vagina as it was a little thinner than the big one we already have.

She made me watch her get about six inches into herself a few times before taking it out, ordering me into all fours, squirting some lube up me and set into the task of forcing it into me handheld.

She had to use a lot of force to get the head in, but it didn't hurt. She worried me a bit because she couldn't control herself well with the strength she was using, and so as soon as she pushes through my resistance she couldn't help but follow through with about four inches in a very fast movement. That took my breath away.

She then took things slowly. Gradually working it deeper until she hit my second hole and I said I could feel some pain.

She paused the pushing and just held it against that resistance for a few moments before applying a little pressure. It didn't take long before I felt a small pop and it pushed past. She then slid the rest of it in up to the base without further stops.

I felt so amazingly full. Just a little pain, nothing close to unbearable, but not really pleasant. The mental feeling of taking all fourteen inches like her anal slut was the biggest turn on.

She proceeded to fully remove and reinsert it 3 more times, giving it hard repetitive thrusts each time she bottomed it out. I didn't like that feeling much. Then she took it out, made me clean it in the sink (not my mouth thankfully) and had me switch to pleasuring her.

I didn't expect to be able to take the whole thing on my first go, especially as I'm only 3 months into ever putting anything inside me in my whole life.

I can barely imagine how the other guy copes getting pounded with it as a strap on. I don't think I could take that at all. The feeling once it went past the second hole was so uncomfortable, that the thought of having it forced back and forth past that point with force and speed scares me. I'm not ready to get pegged that deep by someone pounding the life out of me just yet.

I think the flexibility helped get it so deep. I imagine it bent around my internal curves. The ten inch one is thicker and stiffer. To get that one all the way in it's going to have to straighten me out inside rather than following my curves. She's going to bury it to the hilt when she does peg me with it for the first time, so I've got more training to do before I'm ready for that. The new one is going to help.

The mental impact on me tonight was brilliant. Taking the whole thing on the first attempt, despite the discomfort made me feel so submissive, slutty, objectified, used and more. So much of my submissive craving has me wanting to feel like I did tonight. A dirty slut to endure discomfort, pain, degradation and humiliation to amuse others.

I feel like my Goddess took me forwards a massive step. I hope she found it as positive as I did. I was allowed to help her get to a fantastic orgasm after she finished playing with my butt, so I know she'll sleep well.

Hopefully she'll feel like repeating the exercise again before too long. I'm not going to ask though. She's fully incharge now and I have to do exactly what she wants without pressuring her to fulfil my wants.

I feel like a very slutty little maggot right now.

 

Something my Goddess said in the past few days has triggered me to create a fantasy about how our 90 day denial period might come to an end.

In reality I want her to decide exactly how she wants to mark the milestone, independently of my input. But if I were asked how I might like it to go, it could be something like this.

She takes me away for the weekend. I'm instructed not to pack any clothes. I am told to bring a bag of sex toys.

She's driving. I'm blindfolded in the passenger seat and forbidden to speak.

We arrive at the hotel. I'm told to wait in the car while she goes and checks in. I have no idea where we are.

She returns and escorts me, still blindfolded to our room. As soon as we're inside I'm stripped naked, apart from the cage. The blindfold is removed and I can see the inside of the room, but still have no clue where we are. She buckles wrist, ankle and thigh cuffs to me, along with a collar. She tells me that's all I'll be wearing all weekend.

It's Friday evening. She orders me to wait in the bathroom, putting the blindfold on me once more. She also puts headphones on me playing music so I can't hear anything else.

While I'm waiting she orders room service. Some dinner and wine. Once it's been delivered she fetches me from the bathroom and sits me in the chair. She feeds me, still blindfolded. I can only guess what the food is from the taste and texture. I'm not allowed to speak.

Dinner is finished and she removes the blindfold and orders me to clear up. She takes us into the bathroom and we both bathe. I feel strange doing it in the collar and cuffs, but that's what she instructed to happen.

We then go to bed and she gets me to use the toys and my tongue to bring her to climax several times. I'm caged and not allowed out. She doesn't play with me at all. No anal toys, ball busting, nipple stimulation. Nothing for me. It's all for her.

When she's finished we go to sleep. I'm still cuffed and collared.

Saturday morning and breakfast comes as room service. We eat and get back into bed for intimate cuddles for a couple of hours.

Then suddenly she tells me it's time to start marking our milestone. I'm told to take a Viagra and she hands me the key to unlock.

I'm then blindfolded once more and she clips me onto the bed, spread eagled, attaching my cuffs to webbing straps that she's run under the mattress.

She pushes a plug into my butt and straddles my face, instructing me to lick her to orgasm.

By the time she's finished the blue pill is kicking in and I feel like I've got the biggest erection I've had in 90 days.

She then uses her mouth and hands to bring me right to the edge and then stops. I feel her get off of the bed. I don't know what she's doing. Some time later, maybe five or ten minutes, I feel her again. She brings me to the edge once more, then stops.

For the next four hours she repeats the routine. Edging me, pausing for a few minutes and then repeating.

After four hours of edging after 90 days of denial, I'm in a frenzy.

She says to me, how shall we mark this milestone? Should I let you cum, ruin your orgasm or just lock you back up without any release?

And that's where my fantasy ends. I don't want to think about how I want the 90 days to end. I want her to decide and from those options. All of them excite me in different ways. It shouldn't be a choice I can make.

I wonder what the reality might be? She'll decide...

 

71 days since my last orgasm.

I had an interesting conversation with my lovely goddess wife last night. She'd just had what she described as one of the best orgasms of her life. Of course, I was denied any release, although she did unlock me and played with what we are determined to refer to as her dick for a while. She even sucked it for a bit which was unexpected. Still left frustrated in my cage when she felt I'd had enough attention. I'm happy with that.

So, the conversation. We're on our first journey into chastity, denial, my submission and her taking charge. This journey started in the summer when I confessed my submissive feelings to her.

We agreed to commit to a 90 day chastity and o orgasm denial period to allow us to explore the new dynamic.

I started the conversation stating that I was really enjoying the experience and that my hope was to continue the chastity and her control beyond our 90 day initial period. She agreed that she would like that too.

I then broached the subject of a resumption of allowing me to experience orgasms. I was careful to state that I didn't want to make her feel that she had to try and conform to what she thought I might want. I said my only desire was that she was to control the frequency and situations that might allow me to orgasm. I said I had no wish to suggest what the frequency might be and deliberately stated that it could be anything she desired, from weekly to maybe even years between them.

She understood and said she felt she would like to be in control on a permanent basis. She didn't feel like I was trying to influence her regarding frequency.

So I asked her if she'd given any thought to how frequently she might consider letting me cum. Yes, she replied. She had thought about it.

So naturally, I asked what she had in mind.

She replied that she had a good idea about what she intended to allow. But she had no intention of letting me know. She explained, I'm never going to be allowed to expect an orgasm. When I get them will be entirely down to her and I most likely won't know in advance that she's going to let me get off.

I didn't expect such a considered response. This whole journey was initiated by me and wasn't a desire she'd previously had.

I think she's really enjoying our new dynamic.

I'm thrilled at her response. I genuinely am ready to let her completely control my orgasms, including the possibility of seriously long term denial. If she wants me to go months, years even in denial, I'm ready. If she wants weekly, then I'm ready for that too. As long as it's what she wants, and she hasn't felt pressured to try and do something she thinks I prefer, then I'll be made up. I'm so happy.

 

Brief update. I'll write more detail tomorrow as it's late and I want to take my time describing what happened.

About an hour ago my prostate was milked for the very first time.

Collected about 10ml of fluid.

Yes. I swallowed it all.

New experience I would never have had without adopting this lifestyle - check.

 

First, the milking. It wasn't intentional, and having done some reading, I don't think it was what most would consider milking.

I think it's actually was a couple of steps on the path to a full prostate orgasm. I think I very nearly got one too, but distractions prevented me crossing the line just as I think I was reaching what could very well have been the last moment before lift off. Of course I don't know how close I got, because I've never had a prostate orgasm before, but I got the same point four times and can't imagine how the intensity could have built further without release. How I wish I hadn't been denied by pets, the time of day and my Goddess who was having her sleep disturbed by my shaking and panting to the point that she ordered me to stop at the crucial moment on my fourth and last run.

So what happened?

She orchestrated a masturbation session for herself that went on for an hour. I was ordered to sit/lay on the bed beside her, and with one hand on her vibration, she set off on her own journey while she used her free hand to absolutely crush my balls as they hung outside my cage.

She really forced both of them through a very physical session using all of her grip strength to crush them as hard as she could for the entirety of her one hour session.

It is extremely painful when she lets rip on them, but in the absence of an orgasm for 77 days now, I find the specific pain from ball busting to be the next best physical, sexual sensation I can experience. I enjoy it immensely and encourage her to hurt me this way more often than she would initiate independently.

She's never sustained a busting session for an hour before, not shorter sessions with such intensity. It was more painful than she's inflicted on me previously and far longer than any other session by a massive margin.

Needless to say, by the time I was released I was in a special place. Pain endorphins must have been at maximum. I was massively aroused. And I had this feeling that my prostate was straining at the seams. It's rarely felt so engorged before, if ever.

I felt as opportunity to maybe try inserting a butt plug with a curved bulb on the end that is supposed to hit the prostate. Sometimes when I put it in its simulates a tiny drop of precum to exit the tip of my penis. If it happens at all, it's a single, tiny drop and only that. Repeated insertions have not enabled further drops in the same session to date. I wondered if the prostate swelling I could feel might promote a more substantial emission this time.

I asked for permission and it was granted.

Standing beside the bed with one leg on the edge, I pushed it in. It felt good, but nothing happened. Knowing that previously I've only had any drip from the insertion stroke, I took it out and put it back in a handful of times.

Then without warning after an insertion, I felt a series of rapid involuntary contractions from somewhere around the prostate. That's never happened before. They subsided so I repeated the removal and replacement.

Immediately, gush. I felt the fluid enter the urethra at the base of her penis, and flow to the tip and exit my cage. I'd hoped something might be produced, so I'd positioned a small plastic medicine measuring cup to collect any thing I might produce. The kind of thing you get with a bottle of night nurse medicine. It can measure up to 30ml of liquid. It captured everything.

I pulled the plug out repeated and got, I think, 4 dribbles into the cup. After that, repeated insertions generated no further product. I left the plug in and sat on the edge of the bed, twisted to face my curious, post orgasmic wife, still flushed from her own exertions.

I examined the cup. I'd filled to the 10ml line. The fluid didn't look like a typical ejaculate from me. It was less viscous and while not completely clear, far less opaque than my regular semen. translucent blue grey is the best description.

Prostatic fluid? I don't know.

That was all new. Three Cheers for this lifestyle enabling an old dog to experience new tricks at nearly 50 years old.

But more new experiences were too come...

Since puberty I've often, when aroused, been curious, even turned on, perhaps, at the prospect of swallowing my own, er, population paste. But as I've seen others share, in post orgasmic clarity, the desire and curiosity has instantly vanished and I've been repulsed at the very thought. I've never managed it.

But there I was, without the thought adjusting effect of an orgasm, still massively horny, with a cup of my output. My wife knew already of what I just described about not being able to complete my ambition so far, and so I looked at her, and with that way long time partners can communicate without talking, observed her facial twitch that gave me permission.

Here's a weird thing though. She's squeamish at the thought of me swallowing my own load. She's gobbled down mine hundreds of times during our relationship of nearly 30 years. She's a swallower and expert fellator. I've indulged myself in her willingness to provide the most amazing oral experiences of my entire sexual existence. I've had head in preference to PIV many times. The sensations she can make me feel with her mouth are far better than any vagina has ever created in me. Suffice to say, she's sucked a lot of my, now her dick, and swallowed litres of my DNA.

So she shouldn't be phased by the concept of me imbibing of my own vintage. But she was and as I raised the cup to my lips, she looked away. Oh well.

I hope that doesn't indicate an unwillingness to force me to consume my standard normal ejaculate in the future, demanding I overcome the post orgasm reluctance. Since I found my submissive desires, I've fantasised that she'll give me no choice about having to open wide and swallow my own medicine. We'll find out if she ever lets me orgasm via her penis again. That's not entirely guaranteed by the way.

So. Without the hindrance of an orgasm to make me think straight, I sipped it all from the cup with ease. I made a show of holding it in my mouth, swilling it like mouthwash to ensure every surface was coated. And then I swallowed slowly, not wanting to make it appear as if I needed to get rid of a bad taste. Not that she was looking.

That was easy. This isn't wishful thinking. It tasted of sweet caramel. Not exactly that, but reminiscent of it. There were no other detectable flavours and nothing in anyway unpleasant.

Assuming it was just prostatic fluid, rather than complete semen, I'd be interested to hear how the rest of you that have produced and tasted your own, would describe your flavour. Am I unique? I'm a type 2 diabetic, so maybe the sweetness is a consequence my tendency to have excessive blood sugar. When I'm uncontrolled and it's high, my morning urination can smell like the sugar puffs breakfast cereal. Just a theory.

So let's move on to the nearly prostate orgasms.

At the time I had no idea of what the process to generate a Pgasm was. I knew it was a thing but didn't know how to make them happen.

I presumed that they might happen through anal sex for some lucky guys, but many will never have them and that there was nothing more defined than hope anal penetration will produce the goods. I've since read up, and there's a lot more to it for mere mortals that aren't in the lucky guys camp.

So please consider what happened next was in ignorance of how to get the PGasm. I think it's better for that as some of what happened was a discovery of my own body very much like when I triggered my first ever orgasm at 13 without having set out to try and make that happen. Then it caught me by surprise as I was thrusting against the sheets almost unconsciously in an aroused state with no outcome in mind or even thought possible, only to be amazed when I spurted all over the sheets.

So, not knowing the first thing about Pgasms, I wasn't trying to create one.

I sat on the edge of the bed, facing the adjacent wall, the curved plug still inserted and forced as deep as it could go through the pressure of the mattress below.

Remember the contractions I felt? Those were not an orgasm, but from what I've read, are something that happens on the way to one. I didn't know that of course.

What I did know is that I discovered I could voluntarily contract the same muscles at will. I've never been conscious of being in control of that up to that moment. I had another new learning about my body.

I sat there, happily producing the contractions without finding any fatigue in the muscle. I could vary the strength of them and find I could sustain a contraction for some time.

Each time I did, I could feel that plug being squeezed and it felt not quite nice, but some thing I liked.

I found, after some time, muscles elsewhere beginning to tense up. I started to shudder. I found myself holding my breath. I learned to overcome the breath holding without releasing any of my tensed muscles. More muscles joined the party. I find my butt tensing and letting go caused me to rock on the plug a little. It felt good.

Everywhere all over my body seemed to be increasing in pressure. The shaking was apparent all over and getting more intense. I felt an internal pressure building. I'd not felt that before. I continued and everyone I just described kept moving up levels of intensity. I was panting

I got to a point where I had a feeling something was going to release the pressure that I thought couldn't get stronger. And then the cat jumped on me and her claws scratched my skin. Immediately, I lost the moment and everything relaxed.

Once clear of the feline I started the voluntary contractions again and everything started to build

Well, I went through 4 iterations of this and each time was disturbed just as felt the shaking, tensing and build up of pressure was about to transform into something else. On the final round my wife ordered me to stop right at the most developed part of that whole experience. She wanted to sleep and told me to stop disturbing her with my weird panting and bed rocking. What the fuck are you doing anyway she exclaimed. I didn't really know and just shrugged.

From what I've read, I now think I was right on the cusp of the Illusive prostate orgasm.

I know I felt very frustrated at not being able to carry on. My wife had no idea, I'm sure, that she'd just denied me an orgasm that I wasn't aware I was about to have.

Our objective during the current phase of our relationship is to deny me orgasms for 90 days. I've described all that previously. We only ever countenanced the denial of common, all garden, penis centric orgasms. We want to avoid any refractory period, drive my arousal constantly and make me think beyond my own gratification. Chastity is a tool to help us realise that.

We didn't consider prostate orgasms. They don't have a refractory period, so no sub drop should be expected. But the probably would provide me with self gratification, so I would expect to be denied them during this period.

We discussed this and my wife has decided as it would be a new experience, I am allowed to try and achieve one. I was surprised she went that way. She may even try to help me. If the roles were reversed, I think I'd put it on the deny list until we clear this phase.

She's too nice to me a lot of the time.

However, I've tried to recreate the experience 3 times since then, and nothing has happened at all. Can't reproduce the involuntary contractions that I've now read are part of the journey. Nothing at all has worked the same way.

I'm supposed to be frustrated and kind of enjoy it.

But if it turns out I let, what might be a very rare chance to get, what is described as the ultimate orgasm a man can experience, slip through my fingers, I'm gonna be experiencing whole new levels of frustration.

So. I didn't milk myself as I originally thought, but I did come within a maggot's penis of achieving the pinnacle of male orgasmic experience only for my Goddess to find a new way to enhance my denial and increase my frustration.

Maggot.

 

Damn. Went past the 15 min edit window. I'm not happy with a lot of the typos. I'm gonna post a second amended version. Bear with me.

When I've put the new version up, any mods that are feeling generous, please feel free to delete the post above and this post, leaving the one I intend to post below in a few minutes.

I'll be a worshipful maggot if the mod is a dominant and an ally if they happen to be any flavour of locked, denied person.

 

The milking. It wasn't intentional, and having done some reading, I don't think it was what most would consider milking. Something much more special nearly happened. At least, I think it did.

I think it was actually a couple of steps on the path to a full prostate orgasm. I very nearly got one too, but distractions prevented me crossing the line just as I was reaching what could very well have been the last moment before lift off.

Of course I don't know how close I got, because I've never had a prostate orgasm before, but I got to the same point four times and can't imagine how the intensity could have built further without release.

How I wish I hadn't been denied by pets, the time of day and my Goddess who was having her sleep disturbed by my shaking and panting to the point that she ordered me to stop at the crucial moment on my fourth and last run.

So what happened?

She orchestrated a masturbation session for herself that went on for an hour. I was ordered to sit/lay on the bed beside her, and with one hand on her vibrator, she set off on her own journey while she used her free hand to absolutely crush my balls as they hung outside my cage.

She really forced both of them through a very physical session using all of her grip strength to crush them as hard as she could for the entirety of her one hour wank.

It is extremely painful when she lets rip on them, but in the absence of an orgasm for 77 days now, I find the specific pain from ball busting to be the next best physical, sexual sensation I can experience. I enjoy it immensely and encourage her to hurt me this way more often than she would initiate independently.

She's never sustained a busting session for an hour before, or even delivered shorter sessions with such intensity. It was more painful than she's inflicted on me previously and far longer than any other session by a massive margin.

Needless to say, by the time I was released I was in a special place. Pain endorphins must have been at maximum. I was massively aroused. And I had this feeling that my prostate was straining at the seams. It's rarely felt so engorged before, if ever.

I felt an opportunity to maybe try inserting a butt plug with a curved bulb on the end that is supposed to hit the prostate. Sometimes when I put it in it stimulates a tiny drop of precum to exit the tip of her penis. If it happens at all, it's a single, tiny drop and only that. Repeated insertions have not enabled further drops in the same session to date. I wondered if the prostate swelling I could feel might promote a more substantial emission this time.

I asked for permission and it was granted.

Standing beside the bed with one leg on the edge, I pushed it in. It felt good, but nothing happened. Knowing that previously I've only had a drip from the insertion stroke, I took it out and put it back in a handful of times.

Then without warning after insertion, I felt a series of rapid involuntary contractions from somewhere around the prostate. That's never happened before. They subsided so I repeated the removal and replacement. I was aware of the muscle performing the contractions as something new.

Immediately, gush. I felt the fluid enter the urethra at the base of her penis, and flow to the tip and exit my cage. I'd hoped something might be produced, so I'd positioned a small plastic medicine measuring cup to collect any thing I might release. The kind of thing you get with a bottle of night nurse medicine. It can measure up to 30ml of liquid. It captured everything.

I pulled the plug out multiple times and got, I think, 4 dribbles into the cup. After that, repeated insertions generated no further product. I left the plug in and sat on the edge of the bed, twisted to face my curious, post orgasmic wife, still flushed from her own exertions.

I examined the cup. I'd filled to the 10ml line. The fluid didn't look like a typical ejaculate from me. It was less viscous and while not completely clear, far less opaque than my regular semen. translucent blue grey is the best description.

Prostatic fluid? I don't know.

That was all new. Three Cheers for this lifestyle enabling an old dog to experience new tricks at nearly 50 years old.

But more new experiences were too come...

Since puberty I've often, when aroused, been curious, even turned on, perhaps, at the prospect of swallowing my own, er, population paste. But as I've seen others share, in post orgasmic clarity, the desire and curiosity has instantly vanished and I've been repulsed at the very thought. I've never managed it.

But there I was, without the thought adjusting affect of an orgasm, still massively horny, with a cup of my output. My wife knew already of what I just described about not being able to complete my ambition so far, and so I looked at her, and with that way long time partners can communicate without talking, observed her facial twitch that gave me permission.

Here's a weird thing though. She's squeamish at the thought of me swallowing my own load. She's gobbled down mouthfuls hundreds of times during our relationship of nearly 30 years. She's a swallower and expert fellator. I've indulged myself in her willingness to provide the most amazing oral experiences of my entire sexual existence. I've had head in preference to PIV many times. The sensations she can make me feel with her mouth are far better than any vagina has ever created in me. Suffice to say, she's sucked a lot of my, now her dick, and swallowed litres of my DNA.

So she shouldn't be phased by the concept of me imbibing of my own vintage. But she was and as I raised the cup to my lips, she looked away. Oh well.

I hope that doesn't indicate an unwillingness to force me to consume my standard normal ejaculate in the future, demanding I overcome the post orgasm reluctance. Since I found my submissive desires, I've fantasised that she'll give me no choice about having to open wide and swallow my own medicine. We'll find out if she ever lets me orgasm via her penis again. That's not entirely guaranteed by the way.

So. Without the hindrance of an orgasm to make me think straight, I sipped it all from the cup with ease. I made a show of holding it in my mouth, swilling it like mouthwash to ensure every surface was coated. And then I swallowed slowly, not wanting to make it appear as if I needed to get rid of a bad taste. Not that she was looking.

That was easy. This isn't wishful thinking. It tasted of sweet caramel. Not exactly that, but reminiscent of it. There were no other detectable flavours and nothing in anyway unpleasant.

Assuming it was just prostatic fluid, rather than complete semen, I'd be interested to hear how the rest of you that have produced and tasted your own, would describe your flavour. Am I unique? I'm a type 2 diabetic, so maybe the sweetness is a consequence my tendency to have excessive blood sugar. When I'm uncontrolled and it's high, my morning urination can smell like the sugar puffs breakfast cereal. Just a theory. My diabetes is normally very well controlled, maybe unlikely to bea cause.

So let's move on to the nearly prostate orgasms.

At the time I had no idea of what the process to generate a Pgasm was. I knew it was a thing but didn't know how to make them happen.

I presumed that they might happen through anal sex for some lucky guys, but many will never have them and my understanding was nothing more than hope anal penetration will produce the goods. I've since read up, and there's a lot more to it for mere mortals that aren't in the lucky guys camp.

So please consider what happened next was in ignorance of how to achieve a PGasm. The experience was substantially better for that as some of what happened was a discovery of my own body, very much like when I triggered my first ever orgasm at 13 without having set out to try and make that happen. Then it caught me by surprise as I was thrusting against the sheets almost unconsciously in an aroused state with no outcome in mind or even thought possible, only to be amazed when I spurted all over the sheets.

So, not knowing the first thing about Pgasms, I wasn't trying to create one.

I sat on the edge of the bed, facing the adjacent wall, the curved plug still inserted and forced as deep as it could go through the pressure of the mattress below.

Remember the contractions I felt? Those were not an orgasm, but from what I've read, are something that happens on the way to one. I didn't know that of course.

What I did know is that I discovered I could voluntarily contract the same muscles at will. I've never been conscious of being in control of that up to that moment. I had another new learning about my body.

I sat there, happily producing the contractions without finding any fatigue in the muscle. I could vary the strength of them and find I could sustain a contraction for some time.

Each time I did, I could feel that plug being squeezed and it felt, not something I'd describe as nice, but some thing I liked nonetheless.

I found, after some time, muscles elsewhere beginning to tense up. I started to shudder. I found myself holding my breath. I learned to overcome the breath holding without releasing any of my tensed muscles. More muscles joined the party. I find my butt tensing and letting go caused me to rock on the plug a little. It felt good.

Everywhere all over my body seemed to be increasing in pressure. The shaking was apparent all over and getting more intense. I felt the pressure building continually. I'd not felt that before. I persisted and everything just described kept moving up levels of intensity. I was panting

I got to a point where I had a feeling something was going to release the pressure. I felt it couldn't get stronger. And then the cat jumped on me and her claws scratched my skin. Immediately, I lost the moment and everything relaxed.

Once clear of the feline I started the voluntary contractions again and everything started to build. I was back on track to, well, I didn't know where I was going, but it seemed worth exploring.

I went through 4 iterations of this and each time was disturbed just as felt the shaking, tensing and build up of pressure was about to transition into something else.

On the final and forth round my wife ordered me to stop right when I felt I'd gone further than any of the previous iterations. She wanted to sleep and told me to stop disturbing her with my weird panting and bed rocking. What the fuck are you doing anyway she exclaimed. I didn't really know and just shrugged.

From what I've read, I now think I was right on the cusp of the Illusive prostate orgasm.

I know I felt very frustrated at not being able to carry on. My wife had no idea, I'm sure, that she'd just denied me an orgasm that I wasn't aware I was about to have.

Our objective during the current phase of our relationship is to deny me orgasms for 90 days. I've described all that previously. We only ever countenanced the denial of common, all garden, penis centric orgasms. We want to avoid any refractory period, drive my arousal constantly and make me think beyond my own gratification. Chastity is a tool to help us realise that.

We didn't consider prostate orgasms. They don't have a refractory period, so no sub drop should be expected. But they probably would provide me with self gratification, so I would expect to be denied them during this period.

We discussed this and my wife has decided, as it would be a new experience, I am allowed to try and achieve one. I was surprised she went that way. She may even try to help me. If the roles were reversed, I think I'd put it on the deny list until we clear this phase.

She's too nice to me a lot of the time.

However, I've tried to recreate the experience 3 times since then, and nothing has happened at all. Can't reproduce the involuntary contractions that I've now read are part of the journey. Nothing at all has worked the same way.

I'm supposed to be frustrated during my denial and have come to kind of enjoy it.

But if it turns out I let, what might be a very rare chance to get, what is described as the ultimate orgasm a man can experience, slip through my fingers, I'm gonna be experiencing whole new levels of frustration. Imagine if I never get close again? Oh boy.

So. I didn't milk myself as I originally thought, but I did come within a maggot's penis of achieving the pinnacle of male orgasmic experience only for my Goddess to find a new way to enhance my denial and increase my frustration.

Maggot.

 

I got a Christmas gift that has left me floating in the clouds.

She let me out of the cage and used her hands to create the first erection I've had in over a month.

She then went on to bring me right to the edge. That's not happened for a long time either.

Oh yeah, she also dipped her fingers into her pussy and then had me suck them clean, over and over again.

I'm absolutely flying. So horny!

She didn't get me to do a thing for her. Although I'm still denied, that feels like a role reversal. I've got all the guilt she used to have when she used me to get her off while I was locked and denied at the beginning (I'm still denied, but she no longer feels any guilt) What an irony!

I think she may find out how much stamina my tongue has when we go to bed later.

 

Quick update.

Days since my last orgasm, ruined or full - 93

Our 90 day trial has come to an end, albeit with an unplanned extension to 93 days due to a family matter that took priority.

Today was the first chance we got to discuss things.

I told her that as a result of my experience over the trial I wanted to give her permanent control of every aspect of my sexual existence for the rest of our lives. I would be sexually submissive to her and she would be responsible for directing anything I ever do sexually for ever.

She then told me she wanted to take control of my sexual existence for the rest of our lives and use me as she saw fit.

So, it's now permanent. She may use chastity if she wishes. I'm now eligible to experience orgasms again, if she chooses to allow me to have one.

As of right now, I'm still caged and denied. There has been no expectation set that I'll be allowed or denied. It's entirely in her hands (I hope!) She wont tell me if I'm allowed to cum in advance of any experience.

If at any time during our play, I feel myself approaching the point of no return, I have to ask her permission to cum and comply with her response. If she says no, I must stop myself from cumming immediately.

I'm looking forwards to the rest of our lives in this permanent dynamic.

 

Some stats from our trial.

In the 93 days since I last came, my wife has had 33 orgasms.

2 of which she experienced via masturbation in my absence. I don't think she masturbated alone for any she hasn't told me about. I actually find it a big turn on when she tells me she got herself off without me. She knows that so I don't think she would feel the need to hide them from me.

One of her solo climaxes came on the end of a water jet in a jacuzzi. She was alone and thinking naughty thoughts. Other family members could have walked in on her at any time. How naughty!

33 is a huge testament to the effect on her libido of feeling in control and not having to consider reciprocating for me.

If I tell you that she probably had fewer than 12 orgasms with me and solo masturbated no more than 3 times in the 12 months before our trial, you can't help but appreciate the sexual freedom and confidence she now enjoys.

What about me? 93 days denied and I've enjoyed it hugely. I would like to have an orgasm again, but I'm genuinely happy to wait indefinitely for her to decide to grant me one. If anything, I'm a little apprehensive that it might be an anticlimax and that sub drop could be a negative experience for us.

 

I was released on day 94. I don't think my wife planned it as much as she just took advantage of circumstance.

She snuggled up behind me in bed in the morning.

My bladder was full and her cock was trying to get hard, pushing my inverted cage forwards.

She noticed and commanded me to get out of the cage. I actually backed out of it and her dick, which hadn't been allowed to be hard since Christmas day was rock solid.

She had a tone of eagerness in her voice and commanded that I get out of it completely. Despite there being a key on the nightstand, I actually pulled it straight off. Both balls squeezing through the gap with quite a bit of pain, but not so much as to quell my arousal.

She got on all fours, without any foreplay, and commanded me to fuck her.

After 94 days with only being allowed PIV twice, and no orgasms, I didn't need telling twice.

She told me to fuck her hard, and so I did.

It didn't take long before I felt myself getting close to the edge, and so I asked, "Am I allowed to cum?"

I expected her to deny me, and was ready to pull out before the point of no return. But she shouted "yes! Cum in me"!

I tipped straight over the edge and flooded her tight pussy.

And that was my first release in 94 days.

She came 4 times in that 24 hour period. I think that's never happened in our entire 25+ year relationship. Yay chastity and orgasm denial!

I've not been allowed to cum since. Currently on day 5 of denial. No idea when the next one might come. Feeling quite a bit of drop since she told me to come. I don't have the same level of constant arousal that I'd grown used to. Not really feeling very much libido at all. Still want to please her and feel lots of love.

I hope she makes me wait a long time for the next one. I miss the feelings that denial inflicted on me.

 

She has told me that she likes the feeling of me cumming in her, and hinted that she missed it during my denial.

I think she actually wanted to deny me for longer, but couldn't resist ordering me to blow by load in her in the heat of the moment.