Am I too strict?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Her_LM, Apr 4, 2023.

?

Am I too strict?

  1. No, I’m doing just fine!

    73.3%
  2. Yes, I’m being too strict!

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  1. sissymaid_honeydew
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    sissymaid_honeydew Active member

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    i wouldn't know if 4 months would work, it depends on the individual. as a sissymaid i'm used to long-term lock-ups (think years!). my partners were happy, i was happy - and - my service to them became much more useful, extensive, refined and Wild!!
     
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  2. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    Have I been ok this year?

    Should I lock him back up for the remainder of the year?
     
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  3. M@rcellus
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    M@rcellus Long term member

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    It's not too strict in comparison to our situation. I asked for chastity and I get just that. Teasing as in being unlocked and played with would be the dom pandering to the sub. I got ball crushing with her feet last night and was grateful for it. She is preparing me for locktober by having kept me orgasm free for 4 months for practice and is now denying me oral sex. Thankfully she allowed me to massage and do reflexology on her feet as she drifted off to sleep. I am a bit jealous of subs who hold their mistresses to ransom by demanding a schedule of willy-teasing or they will cut off their cages or start being obnoxious. Poor subs. Teasing for us is serving and obeying, no more no less. There is no such thing in our relationship as "too strict" as rated by the sub, that is only for my Mistress to decide. I didn't make the rules but they are the only rules on offer.
     
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  4. Queens servant73
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    Queens servant73 Long term member

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    It sounds like you’re both enjoying everything that’s happening so far, so I’d say just keep pushing his boundaries if that turns you on as his KH. If he gets to a point where he just really can’t take it anymore, I’m sure he’d communicate that to you and together you’d decide how to proceed, even if it just means you go back to once a month releases for him.

    In my case, that’s exactly what I’ve asked of my Wife, to do with me as she sees fit, push my comfort zone and see how it goes. Worst case is I’ll start begging for relief and she’d have to decide how to deal with me at that point. But she hasn’t taken me to the point of breaking yet, but no question she’s running the show and being as strict as she desires.
    Exactly what I’ve asked for
     
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  5. Pepe_
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    Pepe_ Active member

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    Good to go! If you are both enjoying it keep it up!
     
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  6. Socal_locked
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    Socal_locked Junior Member

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    Can you describe some of the SPH you have been using?
     
  7. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    #82 Her_LM, Sep 17, 2023
    Last edited: Sep 17, 2023
    Hi.
    Ok, let me try.

    Comparing him to objects, when out in public, shopping etc. When in pharmacies, how small some items, cans, bottles etc. I quite often say so he can hear me, how the item compares to him.

    Sending him text reminders of how small I think he is.

    Comparing him to past relationships. (He is actually the smallest I’ve ever had)

    Bumped into an old ex, (with LM) from teen years, told LM he was the first guy I ever touched, and he was bigger then than what my LM is now.

    Telling him I can hardly feel him when we have piv.

    Telling him past relationships have touched me in places he’ll never be able to reach.

    Telling him past lovers have felt so big and I’ve orgasmed from piv, never with my LM.

    Lying there being bored whilst he’s trying his hardest to pleasure me with piv.

    I don’t even get to moan, I’m just silent most of the time. (That turns him on so much that he cums within a minute) Its so easy to Sph him.

    Holding him with my fingers or finger & thumb when edging him.

    Holding him between my boobs, saying I can’t even see his dick, past relationships have been lucky and they stuck out so I could kiss them, LM will never have that pleasure.

    Comparing him to porn films, how lucky the women are to experience great sex from a normal/big cock.

    Always saying I think he’s best friend has a much bigger cock than LM, and I bet he knows, and he’s probably told his wife about my LM too. (That’s great to talk about when edging him)

    I’ve made him wear tightish swimwear when on vacation, teasing him that others may see.

    Looking at others and comparing whilst on vacation.

    Keeping him shaved, makes him look even smaller.

    Keeping him locked up, no use to me really. (He’s not locked at the moment though, taking a little break)

    In the past I’ve told LM that if my best friend were to find out, that would be humiliating for him, but also embarrassing for me, she’d probably say it’s a shame for me!

    And the most embarrassing SPH thing I’ve done is the following.

    For a couple of years or so, I’ve offing talked about making him go into a mixed nude sauna.

    And guess what, this year I took him into one, I had him shaved too. When in there I made him walk around, sit etc so people could see him.
    I made him jump into the freezing plunge pool, in front of others, and then stood back and watched him get out of the pool, he looked so small, it was so cold.
    I was comparing him to others in there too. I was looking at others much bigger than LM, and making sure he could see me looking.

    I do more, I think I do, I just naturally runs of my younger now.

    Is that ok. Hopefully not too harsh.

    PS, if hubby/LM was effected by anything, or hurt, or uncomfortable, then I wouldn’t do a thing, (I’d just think he was small)
    But he’s not, it was his initial idea, he LOVES it, he loves me, and I love him immensely too.

    Hope that helps. X
     
  8. maiden sissypanies
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    maiden sissypanies Junior Member

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    He could be asked if he agrees with you, that way you know for sure. I think you already know though.
    Yes many a sissy will whole heartedly agree with their Mistress and encourage her to amuse and enjoy herself more with her SPH compliments. Giggles.
     
  9. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    He does agree with me.

    I would love receive a higher score. Come on guys, boost my score higher please x
     
  10. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    Been away for a while. Been unlocked for the whole of October, we just sort of run out of steam regarding chastity, she’s only allowed me 1 orgasm though, she’s on multiple.

    Is this normal, wanting to take a break. I feel it’s more my k/h that needed the break, sometimes life gets in the way, and before you know it, weeks have past.

    Maybe I should lock myself up starting November 1st, maybe I’ll surprise her to a little treat, a meal, and then tell her I’ve locked myself for her.

    I am really desperate to cum though, almost tempted to relieve myself without her knowing, but she wouldn’t like that, so I haven’t.

    I’m still in the least I’ve ever had over a year, and two months to go too.

    Should I lock myself back up again?
     
  11. Caged4Sazz
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    Caged4Sazz My wife has become my KH

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    Nice read, but I'm slightly uncomfortable with his KH posting from his account.
    Strikes me as either fantasy or topping from the bottom.
     
  12. M@rcellus
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    M@rcellus Long term member

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    If it is it's not much of a fantasy. It's a myth that being a keyholder is an effort. I would feel neglected by not being locked and unlocked by my kh and not receiving any effort to give me more conventional sexual pleasure. It's on the wrong side of a dead sex life. If we ever have a break from chastity it won't be her idea.
     
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  13. samseaborne
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    samseaborne Long term member

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    Do you love him enough to end his orgasms forever?

    Roll two dice, thats how many orgasms he has left....ever.

    Then see how much he wants his next orgasm.

    :p:D
     
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  14. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    Hi.
    An update. K/H wife just wanted a break from physical chastity, she’s busy and this time of year she’s finding it hard to put in the effort that’s needed, “her words, not mine”

    She has me now unlocked but still I’m under strict instructions not to touch myself, occasionally she’ll have a little tease with me, but never allowing me to get fully hard or edged. She’s still enjoying regular orgasms, mostly by herself still. As for piv, no, I’m not allowed it, she doesn’t want it, I’m too small to even satisfy her.

    She says she’s going to get through the holiday season and maybe she’ll want me locked again from Jan 1st.

    I’m happy to just do what ever she wants, needs or suggests.
    I’m not sure if it’s worse when unlocked than locked actually, knowing my small cock is on view, able to get aroused, or even touched by her whenever she wants is even more frustrating, at least when I’m locked, it’s a definite no, it can’t get any pleasure.

    LM.
     
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  15. littleguy3
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    littleguy3 Adoring husband

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    Have you been obedient? Any slips?
    Doesn't it make you jealous that she doesn't let you participate? Given my state of denial, I desperately want to give her orgasms for the emotional release. If she was pleasuring herself without me, I'd be extremely frustrated.
     
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  16. NowIveDoneIt
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    NowIveDoneIt Long term member

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    Yeah- For me, I am giving up my pleasure so I can experience much more of hers. If I am cut out of that then I'm living in a state of punishment hell...
     
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  17. starflyer
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    starflyer Junior Member

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    Some great SPH ideas, will be telling my wife
     
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  18. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    hi. totally obedient, oh I’ve so wanted to pleasure myself, it’s been almost agony at some points.
    So no, I haven’t once decided to takes matters into myself. Even though she might never find out, I think I’d be cheating on her, and on myself too.

    She knows how frustrated I feel, she does like me being that way too. Most mornings she’ll dress in front of me, she’ll show me her body, she’ll stand by the bed and show me her deliciously hairy pussy, boobs too, as I go to touch or ask if I can she’ll always do no, not yet.
    So even though I’m unlocked and she’s taking a break from things, she’s still teasing me.
    I love it.
     
  19. Her_LM
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    Her_LM Long term member

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    Yes, all those things she mentions, she does.
    It’s amazing…….

    One thing she didn’t mention that once whilst I was talking to my best friend over the phone, she was feeling playful while sat near me. We’re extremely close, been life long friends, (and we’d talk about sex with our partners etc to each other, he just doesn’t know about chastity, only that my wife plays dominant sometimes) She then said in a loud ish voice “does he know how small you are now, tell him you’re shrunk over these past years. “Does he know how useless it is now”
    That is 100% the truth…..
     
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  20. Jennifer
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    Jennifer Member

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    In my opinion a keyholder can never be to strict in keeping the husband chaste. There are rules which needed a common agreement, for example pegging or not pegging or developing the relationship to a cuckold marriage or not. But for the kind and strictness of the male chastity only the keyholder should make the decisions the husband should have no say here. After starting with it there will be an absolute natural development to permanent erection and orgasm denial with less effort as possible for the key holder. For my hubby erections and ejaculations are things of the past. Physical sexuality is female sexuality only.
     
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  21. peter7447
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    peter7447 Masochistic Husband

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    It all depends on the question if the INTERACTION between you and her is making you and her happy. No orgasms for even a super long time are ok, if the interaction between the two of you is fulfilling.

    I myself was locked for month and even years (with releases and cleaning) and it was great, since there was a lot of interaction btween my partner and me.

    Then with another partner I was locked for one week and I was realizing it that it was pointless, since that partner just thought its ok to "lock it on and never deal in any sexual way with the sub". For me it becomes pointless, if I can no longer feel that there is any kind of game/tension going on between the partner and me.

    Being locked with no interaction is worlds apart from being locked and maybe just receiving a text message every day saying something like "I wish you a very unorgasmic day, my property." .... or ..."I just came very hard. i guess you just came three month ago." ... or ... even something super tiny and small, like "Just thought of you suffering.".

    Of course there is other more elaborate interaction possible. I just stated the text message example to demonstrate that there are worlds between "nothing" and "something".

    So the real question here is: Is that "something" enough for the two of you? If yes, then there is no "too strict, too hard, too painful, too this, too that".

    Only you two can decide that, each person is different.
     
  22. Mr_anonymous
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    Mr_anonymous Long term member

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    There is no one answer to this because everyone's dynamic is different.
     
  23. NowIveDoneIt
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    NowIveDoneIt Long term member

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    Thanks for letting us know how it works for you. Thank god your idea of hell doesn't apply to us. My wife and I love each other and don't want such a harsh, punishing dynamic...
     
  24. Ms.Shauna
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    Ms.Shauna Member

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    I couldn’t agree with you more Jennifer. Over time it is a natural progression to take your hubby to long term chastity and eventually indefinite orgasm denial. It has worked well for us, and keeps him focused on my needs and his servitude.
     
  25. chastity_longterm
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    chastity_longterm Long term member

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    I wish i was you…my mistress lock me but she is not stricth as your mistress…if she is on the mood she will locked me 24 hour, but if she is focusing on something(like work, holiday plan, kids etc) she sometimes forgot to lock me or did anyting to stop me to masturbate..
     
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